Hoya POV
It's been about two months since I last talked to Kana. Of course I saw her practically everyday (fate just isn't nice to help you forget someone) but I never talked to her any of those times. As a matter of fact, I think if I tried to, she would just completely ignore me anyway. None of the Infinite guys talked to her either, even though they each have a class with her.
To say it is difficult to try and forget her, to talk to her, is undermining the word difficult, practically an insult. In better terms, it's like writing with your right hand your entire life, then having to suddenly change to your left hand. It . But what can I do about it? It wasn't my choice. I should respect her will, right?
I was sitting at a lunch table with Infinite but no one was speaking. We just ate in silence. Or was it just me? I can't even tell. Ever since that day, my mind has wandered quite a bit...more like a lot. Kana. Choi Kana. Why must you do this to me? We had only just met, we had only talked during our lunch date, we had only gotten to know a small fraction of each other. Yet, why do I feel this way?
"Hoya hyung~. Are you listening? OI! HOYA HYUNG. CAN YOU HEAR ME?!" Sungjong yelled. I snapped out of my thoughts and blankly looked at him. "Geez, what did you do to Kana noona? She barely talks to me anymore!" I was confused. Noona? When did this kid get close enough to her to call her noona?!
"Yah," I glared,"Lee Sungjong. Why are you calling her noona, huh? Why are you so close to her?" He only shrugged his shoulders, not fazed and said,"She works at the music store with me. She is like my sister. But not anymore! Now I barely talk to her! Only about stupid work stuff! What did you do?!"
I rolled my eyes at him. Why is he being such a diva today? Gosh...wait, what does he mean what did I do? I didn't do anything! "What on earth are you talking about? I didn't do anything! She's the one who decided to not be social with us anymore! I didn't do anything! Sunggyu hyung can prove it. He was there, right hyung?"
Little did I know that Sunggyu wasn't eating with us today, but was off trying to talk to a girl who refused to speak to anyone. That anyone being Infinite. That girl being Kana.
Sunggyu POV
I'm tired of this nonsense. Just because of those annoying fan girls, she refuses to even talk to us? That's rediculous! They respect Infinte and know that our business is our business. They understand that we can befriend more than just each other. We're humans after all! (Author's note: Infinite are NOT humans. They are gods! How can I even write such nonsense...)
I searched everywhere for her--the roof, the garden, the back, the field. I was just about to give up looking when I passed by one of the music rooms and heard and piano playing. I followed it and soon heard Kana's voice singing.
Achim haessare nuneul tteugo
Haendeupon sigyereul bogo
Eoje junbihan oseul ipgoseo
Seodulleo jibeul naseojyo
Maeil jeulgyeo deutdeon noraereul
Honja heungeolgeorigo
Iksukhan i bilding saireul
Honja geotgoitjyo
Monday, tuesday, everyday…
Geureokjeoreok nan jaljinae
Chingudo manhi mannago
Yojeumen utneunildo manhajyeosseo
Summer, winter, spring & fall
Siganeun ppalli ganeunde
Wae naneun jejarieseo
Neol gidarineunji
Neowa gadeon keopisyop
Uri dulmanui keopisyop
Ni hyanggiga naneun igoseseo
Meonghani anjaisseo
Ajik itji motaeseo
Uri gieogi namaseo
Nado moreuge tto beoreutcheoreom
Yeogi wanneunji molla
-"Coffee Shop" by B.A.P
I knocked on the door which startled her. She stopped singing and faced me, but a frown immediately graced her face. I heard a faint,"Oh, it's just you," coming from her which made me frown a little. I walked into the music room and walked up to her to have a chat. She was about to stand up and leave, but I pushed her shoulders gently to sit back down.
"Kana-sshi...why are you being like this? Because of fan girls? They'll stay away from you if we say so. They're nice and respect us. (Author's note: YEA INSPIRITS!) If you think being our friend is troublesome, we can prove to you it's not at all. Hoya hasn't been the same ever since you left us at the park two months ago."
Truth be told, I haven't been the same either. My heartbeat would become irregular every time I saw her or heard her sing in class. What am I to do? I had to, for my sake and Hoya's, get her back in our lives. Whether I liked it or not, Hoya kind of needed Kana in a way. He told us he thought he could get over her since he only liked her for about a day so it practically wasn't even real.
It it was a lie. A very big lie. Who knew this girl would have such a big impact on him? After knowing each other really for a day, you'd think it was just false pretenses. Nope. Not at all. He liked her. A lot. After that one day, it was like a deciding moment and he couldn't get over her, no matter what.
I looked at at her hopefully thinking she'd consider what I said, but by the look on her face, I started to doubt it. "Sunggyu-sshi...I can't..." she said. "Yes you can!" "No I can't! You just don't understand!" "Of course I don't understand because you won't tell me anything!" I half-screamed at her.
She hung her head and didn't look at me. She said,"No matter how much I wish maybe, I can't. It doesn't matter that they're nice and respectful because one of them isn't. No matter what. And that one will hurt me again. I don't want to be hurt like that ever again. That's why I made that decision. Can you understand that now? I don't want to be hurt!"
My heart hurt after hearing that. What could've possibly happened to her before? "Kana-sshi...please...what makes you think you'll get hurt again? Infinite will protect you...I'll always protect you. You don't have to worry." I heard a small sniff and the shake of her shoulders implied she was crying. Why?
Kana POV
Two months. I haven't talked to Infinite for two months. It's definitely difficult seeing how all of them are in one of my classes. However, I've kept up the cold front for two years so this is nothing. But is it really? Am I really going to just let this go because I'm afraid of some stupid jealous fan girls? Is it really so wrong to want to be friends with people? Apparently...
I've been trying my best to avoid them, minus class, and have been going to one of the music rooms during any breaks/lunch. Music has always been the greatest way for me to escape any troubles I'm having however, this problem has not been going away at all. Every day, all I see are those faces of brokenness, complete confusion, and sadness.
It was like they were saying without saying,"How could you do this? What kind of a person are you? Why did you do this? Don't you think about anyone besides yourself? How. Why." Every day. All the time. Non-stop. It's been eating me up all this time, but what's done is done. No matter how much I might want things to be different, nothing can change now.
However, that all changed when Sunggyu came into the room and tried convincing me to stop ignoring them. He just doesn't understand. He's never been hurt like I have. He's never had to go through what I did and still do everyday. He doesn't understand. So why is he trying to?
"I'll always protect you. You don't have to worry," he said. I flashbacked to a moment when Changjo said that to me oh so long ago, promising he won't let Hyeri hurt me like she did. Those words stung my heart so bad. I've never trusted guys ever since, I've never wanted to be hurt the way I was ever again.
So I cried. How can he lie like this to me? He can't protect me. Only I can protect myself. That's what I've believed for so long and I won't let it go so quickly. Then, Sunggyu hugged me. His arms were wrapped around my body, his hands soothingly rubbing my back. Is this supposed to be comforting? Am I supposed to just give in and cry like all those stupid romance stories?
Instead I got up and ran. Far away from him and from Infinite. I went to the music store and sat in the back room, crying my eyes out. What is wrong with me? Why am I being like this? I didn't stop, but I kept crying. I went into a room that had a piano and recording equipment and just started playing.
I didn't know someone was in there. They didn't know I came in. I only played my heart out--my sick, hurting, cold, black heart. I played and played some random tune until I felt a little bit better. Then as I was slowly calming down, came the clapping. This person, who was just in the room for however long that I never noticed, had enjoyed my small recital displaying my emotions.
This person, was Hoya.
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HELLO EVERYONE!!! I sincerely apologize that this update took forever! Like, 100% FOR.EV.ER. Even I was getting tired of waiting...Anyway! Here is VERY long awaited update! Enjoy! Comment! Subscribe! Please! Thank you! I have no idea what I'm doing! I'm very excited! Okay I'll stop now...
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