SNSD’s Dorm:

“Everyone! Exciting news, will be working with Donghae oppa for music video Kissing You”

“Cool”

“fun”

YoonA:  Really? Its going to be so much fun!

Jessica: Donghae ? Oh... mkkay

*flashback*

Jessica: Oppa, the media really hates me right now. Its all cause of the picture of me and you before the debut days. I’m like the SM ...

Donghae: you are not! Sica, just stay close to me I wont even let you get hurt.

Jessica: how? Your going to China for super junior-M tommrow.

Donghae: Well, my phones always on!

Jessica: Oppa, have you ever though about us being more then just friends?

Donghae: We are more! We’re practically siblings!

Jessica: noo, donghae, i mean like ... dating.. or what not.

Donghae: ... Sica, I’m so sorry.... theres someone I already really like, and i think she likes me back...

---------------

After that day me and Donghae never went back to normal. We avoided eachother, and i stopped calling him oppa. 3 months after  our conversation he returned to the SM building. ( We all live in the same general area “sm town”.) Other members of both Super Junior and SNSD realised something was going on , they asked but no one really honestly cared. I started noticing Donghae and YoonA talking more, did she replace me.... or was she the girl Donghae truly loved. I admit it hurt me BAD, but YoonA’s my sister and I could never wish anything but happiness on her.

The day of the filiming for Kissing You came. I’m really nervous. Why donghae?! Why couldn’t it be... well , ANYONE else. Its going to be akward, and even seeing him makes the memories of everything that used to be come back up. --- I look to my left and see a familiar figure walking into the set. It was Donghae, i didn’t think it was possible but yes, he did get hotter. Walking in with his jeans and a t-shirt, he makes it look so casual to look so handsome. As far as I can see, the old Donghae, I’ve known and loved is gone...

“Okay everyone gather around!”   

“ This is how the video will go, Donghae, you will be shooting a scene with every single girl. The girls will do there dance with the lollipops, and then fool around for the camera. Pretty simple right? –Okay! Action!!”

“Donghae your up with Jessica and Hyoyeon first--- Wheres Jessica?!  Jessica!?”

I was hiding in the back hoping not be seen by Donghae.

Jessica: “ im right here , sir.”

Donghae turns towards me, then turns away immediately. Its like hes mad at me. I start walking around, me and Donghae don’t make eye contact nor physical contact.

“CUT! Jessica, Donghae I need atleast eye contact! We’re filming here! --- ready? Action!”

OMG! What am I suppose to do?! I decide that this is my  career, I only have on shot at my career and how Donghae thinks of me I don’t care anymore. I look up into his eyes. Although everything else has changed, his eyes are the same. I still feel safe when I look into them, I feel still loved. Then I realise that he doesn’t love me, he never had. I look down immediately. Tears... Don’t you dare come.

“Cut! And we’re done. --- Lets film SNSD’s scenes then do the rest of the solo sets.”

-finishes scenes with snsd-

“Okay I want Yoona and Donghaes scene”

I turn around and I see Yoona and Donghae all ready to go. They’re laughing together, and seem to be having a lot of fun. That used to be me... I can’t stay and watch this. I pack my bags and leave. It doesn’t really matter all of my scenes are done, might as well leave.

Jessica: “ Sir, I’m leaving now, please excuse me”

“Not sticking around for the fun of it?”

“ no I’m a little tired”

YoonA: “ Wait, Sica You can’t leave! You have to watch me and give me criticism!”

Jessica: Sorry YoonA, your doing great anyways. I’m leaving. Byeee!

I look before I leave, and i see Donghae looking towards me. He immediately turns around as if not a care in the world. I walk out the door and now is when I can start tearing.

I call my manager to come pick me up.

Jessica: “ Oppa, can you pick me up? I’m done.”

“ Im sorry Sica, but traffics crazy , can you wait down in the cafe for a little bit?”

Jessica: Alrighty

“Dont get a taxi or a bus, we don’t need more photos of you on the net. Okay byee

I find a table in the cafe, and order myself a coffee. I flip open my phone and start texting who ever i could around the area to come have a coffee with me.  Its Monday everyones busy. I need to make some friends that aren’t famous. I decide to just sip my coffee and have a long think. I think about Donghae, why did he seem mad? What is it that I have ever done to him. Hes the on who broke my heart and left me alone to piece it back together.  I fall asleep thinking.

“Ay Jessica , wake up.”

Whos waking me up! Really! I was having such a nice nap. Probably manager.

“ Oh, Okay Im up, did you finally get out of the traf--- O ... Donghae.”

“ So thats why you didn’t go home.”

“mhmm”

“ Okay I’m leaving.”

“.... okay bye...--- WAIT!”

“ what.”

“ Why are you so mad at me?”

“Im not mad.”

“yea sure, i know we’re not friends any more so you might as well tell me”

“ Fine, you wanna know? You said people were calling you the for those pictures. How do you think i felt? I was the boy who had to defend himself and you from the media. I had boys sending me hate mail, because they hated I was with you, I had girls who wanted to kill you. It was hard on me to. Top it off, you confessed to me? I didn’t want to hurt your feelings, and I know I did, but atleast now you’ve moved on. Thats not why I’m mad though. I told you to call me in the 3 months in china. Yea, we were akward but after waiting for a call a text or anything , that I didn’t get anything. I just wanted a call or text from you letting me know you were okay . I couldn’t make the first move, I couldn’t after i hurt you so bad, so I needed you to. I waited 3 months Sica. I still didn’t give up after 3 months I came back, and still nothing. I gave up after another year. So don’t ask me why I’m mad because I’m not anymore, Its just now I’ve lost my hope in you.”

Jessica:  Well thanks for being honest Donghae. My managers here.  Now, Its my turn to leave.