Sooyoung runs from there, crying. She can still hear yoona voice calling for her, telling her to stop. But she just gets into her car, and drive. It’s raining too hard that people can hardly see the street. Even if she got wet from running earlier, she doesn’t care at all. All she wants right now is running, running from this stupid relationship, from yoona, from all that lies, from anyone.

She can feel her heart break into pieces. She knows, that she still in love with yoona, so much. But still, her heart can’t take the pain anymore. Why should she keeps a relationship when the other person doesn’t even willing being with her.

She can see that all this time, yoona never want to be with her. She met the girl when she entered high school. That time she falls for her eventhough yoona doesn’t have any feeling for her. For about two years later, she feel all her effort courting for yoona has been paid when the latter agreed to be in relationship with her.

It was few weeks after that, sooyoung found out that actually, yoona never been in love with her. She accindentally heards yoona’s conversation with her friends. She remember it clearly.

“hey, I heard that you’re in relationship with choi sooyoung. Is that true?” one of yoona friends asked her.

“oh yeah, I don’t know that you’re in love with her.” Her other friends said.

“I don’t” yoona answers her friends question while reading her magazine.

“you don’t? so why did you agree being in relationship with her?”

“you know, it’s been two years since I know her. And all this time she always says that she love me. Even everytime I tell her that I don’t have any feeling for her, she never stop. So, I think if I show her that I don’t love her she will give up on me.”

“by being in relationship with her?” her friends ask her curiously.

“if she don’t stop even after I tell her that I don’t love her, then I will just show her that we’re not meant for each other. I will just make her break up with me”

“is that why you act so cold to her? So that she will breaking up with you?”

“ yeah”

“I should have stop when I heard that.” She is crying while talking to herself “why should I become this stupid to believe that I can change her, that I can make her fall for me.” Tears runs down from her beautiful eyes. She can’t think of anything at all. All she hears just her phone keeps ringing.

She doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t know where to go, doesn’t want to do anything at all. She’s trying to find a place where she can be alone. A place where she doesn’t have to meet anyone, especially yoona. That’s why she can’t go back to her dorm. She is afraid that if she sees that girl crying she will run to the girl to comfort her like how she usually does. How can she does it when she is the one who needs it right now.

 She keeps driving until she arrives at her home. Her sister’s house.

“after all, this is what she wants. Don’t you dare crying choi sooyoung” she mumble slowly while wiping her tears before going out from her car. She can feels herself trembling from the cold.

She is walking to her house while trying to think for an explaination in case her sister asks her about what happened to her. Well, seeing her condition right now, she actually should think about one’s.

“yeahh, wait..” she hears a woman voice after a few knock. “didn’t I said… oh God, choi sooyoung, what the hell happened with you.” Her sister, soojin appears from the door after looking at her soaked sister, with puffy check, red nose and eyes. She can clearly tell that her sister has been crying.

“well, you see.. it’s raining” sooyoung grins, not looking at her sister, while walking through her, entering the house.

“yeah, but it doesn’t explain why you’re crying” her sister grabs her hands before she can walking further.

Sooyoung sighs. She doesn’t know what to explain or how.

“it’s her again, right?” her sister cupped her face, trying to make sooyoung looking into her eyes.

“it’s not that, unnie.. I’m just… you know, tired.. sleepy.. ”

“you should give me an explaination, not an excuse. Sis..” soojin staring at her sister who still refuse to face her. “this is not the firs time you come home in mess, soo... What did she do now?” soojin said sofly, wanting an answer. She is abselutly worried for her. Sooyoung is her only sister and she hate it when she have to see her sister like this.

“I’m okay, sis.. I just need to sleep..”

“soo.. who are you seeing me as? A stranger? I’m your sister. I know something wrong, and I really want to help you. I know you are in pain, But I don’t even know what to do or what’s wrong.” Soojin starts to raise her voice to see her stubborn sister, a stain of tears fall from her eyes. “please, at least let me help you.” Soojin said softly and realease her grip from sooyoung’s arm.

“I’m sorry, sis.. I just really tired right now.  I promise to tell you after I get some rest, okay?” sooyoung hugs her sister. She needs time, to think about what to say to her sister.

“okay..” soojin said softly while hugging her sister back.

-----

Yoona runs to her room, crying, when they arrive at the dorm. She can feels her heart breaking. It’s like someone keep crushing her heart, and every little pieces that remains, keep being crushed.

“I never know that it will hurt this bad” she keeps mumbling while tears seems can’t stop running from her eyes.

She is sitting on her bed, while crying when the door open, revealing an angry taeyeon with jessica who is trying to calm her girlfriend down.

“satisfied?!?!” taeyeon asks while looking staright to the latter who seems lost her word.

“yeah, of course. All these time, this is what you want, right?” taeyeon said sarcastically.

“tae.. please stop..” jessica trying to pull taeyeon arm to get the girl out from that room.

“this is your reason to hurt her, right? You must be happy now. Why are you crying? Are you trying to put an act right now, so that sooyoung will back to you and you can hurt her again?”her voise getting higher and nobody seems to be able to stop her.

Yuri and tiffany come to the room, trying to stop taeyeon anger. While tiffany come to yoona side and hugs the latter.

“give her time tae, let’s just..”

“you know, I always tell sooyoung to break up with you. I’m in pain when I see her like that. Always tell us that she is okay when she isn’t. she always keep her own pain because she doesn’t want to burden us. But she just love you too much that she keeps on telling us ‘just wait a little bit’” taeyeon keeps talking cutting yuri off. “do you even know what had she done for you?”

“I hurt her… I don’t deserve her” yoona said between her sobbing

“that’s it?!! After all she did for you, that’s all you can say” taeyeon glare at the girl. “it’s 3 years, she is fighting for you. Now, it’s not even a day and you already give up on her!! You know what? You’re right. You don’t deserve her. Out of all people she can fall in love with in this world, why it has to be you.” Taeyeon said in anger, with that she leaves the room.

Seeing that jessica go after her girlfriend. At least to make sure she’s calming down. Yuri just sighs while looking at yoona who is being hug by her girlfriend right now. Taeyeon anger seems make her guilt bigger and she is having a hard time to stop her tears.

“you know, taeyeon is not that bad actually. She is just angry that you hurt her bestfriend.” Yuri tried to calm the crying latter. “well, even if she is right that you’re really bad to soo…” yuri continued which earning a glare from tiffany.

“I mean, that you’re not really good to her” yuri gulp when seeing her girlfriend glare. “and what taeyeon is trying to said is that instead of sitting here crying, why don’t you go to her and apologize? At least to show her that you’re sorry. You know, you’ll be really surprised to know what sooyoung had been done for you. Taeyeon is really angry because after all the stupid things sooyoung had done for you, all you do is giving her pain.”

“do you remember that time when you have a chat with your friends?” yuri sits beside yoona and staring to the wall. “she heard you. We heard you actually. Trust me, that time you can’t imagine how mad taeyeon were. She kept on telling soo to break up with you. Well, in fact we did. But she just calm taeyeon down and told her that it’s okay. She simply told us that just wait a little longer. Maybe you can change.”

Hearing that, yoona seems can’t control her tears anymore. Tears keeps on running from her eyes. Without noise, it’s like water which just can’t stop from pouring out. While tiffany can only rubbing her back.

 “or do you know when you she were waiting for you all night and fell asleep on the couch? I lost count already for how many times she was fallen asleep on the couch with her phone on her hand that maybe you will call or text her.”

“do you know that she rejected a scholarship from Japan just stayed with you? I think it a month after your relationship. She rejected that and prefered to be with you.” Yuri chuckled bitterly “I guess you don’t”

“how about that time when it’s your birthday? Do you remember. You made her sick waiting for you all night. Which you just simply told her that you forgot your date with her. Do you know that she waited for you until morning on the rooftof? And after that she got sick for days?”

“and you don’t even remember her birthday. You choose to go to that agency party with your friend instead being with her on her birthday. Being with someone else…”

“all this time taeyeon and I keep on telling her to broke up with you. And now, after you two really broke up I don’t know whatever I should happy for her or not.” Yuri sighs, turning her face to look at yoona who still crying.

“well, just in case you want to apologize, she is at her sister’s” after saying that, yuri stand up and walking out from that room.

“I will leave you to think about that, okay?” tiffany asks, which just earning a nod from yoona. Then tiifany go after her girlfriend.

“should I go? What if she hate me? What if she just tell me to leave? does she even want to see me? Oh.. God, what should I do?” yoona mumbled to herself with her eyes closed.