Chapter 10

Me and Xiumin and Kris go back to the studio and the others are relieved to see us.

"Tao there you are finally!" Lay said. "Where'd you go? Take a dump?"

I blush, "N,no."

"Woah you really look like a girl. You look even better than Luhan!" Chen said.

"Hey!" Luhan protest.

"Really. You look y in the worst way," Chen cackled and Luhan went red and step on his foot with his stiletto heel. "YOUCH!" Chen hopped around on his foot.

I laughed and so did Xiumin.

"See, there nothing to worry about," Xiumin said, looking up at me and squeezing my hand.

I nod happily and squeeze his hand back. My heart beat so wildly, and i can feel my face heating. Really, who knew Xiumin such a great guy. If I were really a girl.... I mean what? Hahah! Dangerous thoughts!

I let go of Xiumin hand and turn to walk away toward the set but I pump right into Kris!

"Oh sorry!" I said.

And Kris big hands steady me by my shoulder.

"Watch out," he said.

I nod and about to go away but then he tilt my head up by my chin and our eyes meet. I feel frozen I don't know what to do and then one of his hands dtroke the long black hair that tumbled down my shoulder.

"Kris ge?" I ask.

But he doesn't say anything just smirks and then walk away. And if my heart was beating fast holding Xiumin's hand earlier now it's just going crazy!!!

----

Filming ended up fun and after filming went by well too and so we go back to the dressing room to get undressed.

"You did good today," Xiumin said coming behind me.

"Yeah you pulled off the cute concept well!" Chen agreed.

"I guess it's expected since you're the maknae," Lay mused.

"Despite his scary face!" Chen laughed.

"My face isn't scary!" I protesting.

"Of course it isn't you look cute as a button," assured Xiumin.

"Thanks hyung...err I mean--" I take a deep breathe and then I put on my most cute smile, making sure my eye smile show and tilting my head. "Minseok Oppa."

Suddenly the entire room just go silent.

"G,guys?" I ask, my face beocming concerned.

But everyone just frozen. Chen who was ing his shirt just freeze his mouth wide open. Lay too frozen beside the clothing rack. Luhan looks a bit panicked and turned to Kris who dramatically turns away and kneels on the floor. ANd then there's Xiumin who is stnading in front of me eyes and mouth open like a fish as if he doesn't know what to say.

"Hyung?" I try again.

"TAO don't do that!" SUddenly Xiumin shout and grab me and suddenly my back against his chest and his hand is over my mouth. "You can't do that don't you know there are dangeorus hyungs in this room!!!"

Chen burst out laughing and the other hyungs seems to collect themselves. And Lay pry Xiumin away from me and Chen pull me away from him.

"Yah only you are the dangerous hyung in here. You and Kris over reacting! It just a joke, right Tao?" Lay said.

I nod nnocently and Xiumin grumble.

"You got a little blood on ur nose," Chen say.

"I DO NOT!" yell Xiumin and he storm off grabbing his clothes. He seem kind of in a bad moon and I don't udnerstand why. It just a joke, right?

"Don't worry about him. He can't tell the difference between a girl and his dongsaeng apparently," Chen joked, and looked at me, reaching up and patting my head. "You do look like a total girl though. Although a bit ugly!"

I elbow him and pull away and that when I notice Kris hunched on the ground and Luhan croached beside him as if he comforting him.

I wonder what that's all about.

----

*KRIS POV*

It's over. My life is over as I know it. I can't go on like this. Seeing Tao smile like that to Xiumin hyung and the way they hold hands on the way. The way that Xiumin seem to protect him and Tao clings to him. Why can't it be me. But the last straw is when Tao call him oppa.

It not the fact that Tao call him oppa and he look so cute and I just want to die right there (ok maybe it that too). But it also the way Xiumin react. I know for sure, even if Xiumin and Tao don't know it that something going on, something is brewing. If it go unchecked it could blossom into more.

I cna't live with myself if it does.

I sitting in the car while we heading back to the dorm. Tao is sitting in the back. He's leaning his head on Xiumin shoulder and kind of dozing off and I tryng my best to ignore them since i sitting in the front with manager but it hard.

Luhan tried to comfort me in the dressing room but it really no use. I just feel so bumed out. How did it end like this? Why can't i just be content with sitting on the side lines.

We get back to the apartment and Xiumin goes to get a snack and Tao disappearinto his room. I watch Tao and sigh about to just head to me and Chen shared room when suddenly I feel a hand on my shoulder. I turn and see it Luhan and he frowning.

"You're sulking," he says.

"Am not," I reply.

"Are too. Just stop ok. It's pathetic. And like I told you before about the 'Oppa' thing it's your own damn fault."

"How is it my own fault?" I shoot back. "Because I never act on it? Well how I supposed to know he could possible develop feelings for another guy, huh?"

I go to walk off but Luhan just shake his head and grab my elbow.

"Let's take a walk--"

"But," i protest.

"Kris and I going to the conviniece store!" Luhan shout and before manager can say anything we are out the door again.

As soon we out the door I shake my arm from Luhan grip. We walk in silence to the store and we get in and Luhan gestures me to go to the freezer. We go there and Luhan open it and we stand n front and each decide on one and then I pay for both.

We go back outside and start walking andeating out ice cream and luhan start to talk.

"I think you should go for it," he said.

"Huh?"

"You should tell Tao how you feel," Luhan clarify.

I shake my head, "re you crazy? I'd scare him away if he knew how i felt."

"Do you really believe that?" Luhan ask. "I mean... i know you see it too. Him and Minseok hyung are... close. And yeah others are close. Minseok and Jongdae are close. Me and Lay are close. Me and You are close even but it not the same kind of close. Not even the same close as you and Jongdae and you are roommate too. I think if you don't act now it going to be too late once they realize how they feel."

And there it was. Luhan voice exactly how I felt. It was my fear. I was fearful that my suspicion might be right.

"I... But what if he doesn't like me back?"

"We both know that Tao looks up to you. Maybe he just doesn't realize he can like you that way. But if you just propose to him the possibility..."

"You mean--?"

Luhan nodded, "Yes. I think the main reason Tao and Minseok are gong to take a while to realize their feeling for each other is because both of them haven't realized that the feeling they have for each other can legitamtely be anyting else. haha I bet those two in their minds always go 'ah, but he's jsut a brother' or 'he's my member he's just a friend. it jsut natural we guys that I feel this way'. They don't realize it's romantic because the possibility hasn't dawned on them yet. But you advantage on Minseok hyung because you know. So you tell Tao now before Minseok figures it out."

"It feels so underhanded," I said.

"Sometimes the way to get what you want is to act like a snake," Luhan said, and he threw his icecream stick out. "And plus Minseok is most likely only straight. He doesn't eally think of guys like that and probably won't think of guys like that ever. Just... Tao's.. special for him. I think a situation like that could break Tao's heart in the end."

We reached the dorm and stop at the front.

"You think about it ok. I just saying this as a friend. Besides if Minseok doesnt even realize his feelings why should he be the one to win, huh?"

----

*TAO POV*

I get back in my room and I lounging in my bed taking a selca with my phone when I see Xiumin just laying on his tummy on his bed studying chinese so I go over and sit by him. I lay on my back and take a selca so it show Xiumin face stufying in his book n the background too.

"Don't upload that," he said. "I don't have any make up."

I laugh and nudge his shoudler, "Why? It a nice picture. You look so... studious!" I say picking the word.

He sit up and take my phone.

"Hey!" I protest.

But he just look at the icture and then hand the phone back.

"I guess it ok," he said and then lean back down and continue  to study.

 I play on my phone a little but then I sitting there at some point i just looking at him as he study. It kind of nice just sitting beside him while he study. I put on some music on my phone and just recline beside him watchig him.

"What you doing?" he finally ask.

"Watching you," I say.

"How can you say that so frank. Aren't you embarassed" he laugh.

"Why should I be emabrassed?" i say, tilting my head a little. "Beside you look at me all the time too."

Suddenly he blush a little as if he been caught and he try to hide his head in his book. I feel a little proud that I make him a llittle flustered.

"it's not like that," he said.

"I know" I smile. "We just... like brothers."

He seem to tense at that, and I don't know why, but I like the fact that I seem to have gotten to him somehow. Lately I just feel like with Xiumin I want to just make him react. Like when I asked him about Victoria just to get a reaction. But sometimes he doesn't react. Sometimes he does. Like today he definitely react. I don't know what it mean but it make me excited in some way.

"Yeah... you know I always looking out for you. Like brothers," he smile at me. His previous tension gone.

"I never had a sibling," I said. "I don't know how brothers supposed to act. In Korea many people have sibling but in China it not like that."

"Brothers don't act any certain way we just act what's natural and taking care each other," Xiumin reply. "There no limit to the bounds of brother love."

"Really?" I ask, and look at him in the eyes. "Well... you remember how we used to sometimes before just lay here and cuddle. That's ok too, right?"

I watched as Xiumin swallowed before nodding slowly and I scooted forward so that my body pressed against his. And there it was my heart it starting to beat a bit qucker again. And I don't know why I asked that. Normally we cuddle a lot before, but this time somehow I felt I had to ask. Maybe it because now i'm a girl??

Slowly I felt Xiumin arm wrap around me and he resituate his self so that I can press my back against his chest. He rbings his book forward so he can still read it while holding me. Sometimes, when I still a boy he would hold me, orther times i hold him, or even we hold each other. Either way it comfortable and good. Is this how it is to have a brother or is it something else?

It so comfortable and so there and I play with a ring on one his fingers as I listening the sound of his heart beat and the quiet hum of him reading chinese as he study.

"Ne, hyung?" I begin after a few minutes.

"Yeah?" he said.

"You know it weird... today I had the strangest feeling. Just a tiny feeling. It nothing really. i don't know. Just a... just a strange feeling," I began, feeling a little shy.

"What is it, Tao?" he asked and he squeezes my hand that's playing with his fingers.

"I was just thinking that... you know... while we were together and you helped me that it kinda nice you know... that a girl would be really lucky... should you want to date her. I was just thinking like that, y'know. She really lucky."

"Tao..."

"Supposing I was really girl... not that I want to be a girl but supposin I was. Do you think I'd be a good girlfriend, too?" I ask.

There was hesitation and I had to hold my breathe.

"Supposing you were," Xiumin said. "I'd say yes. You would be. And any guy'd be delighted to have you."

I can't help but smile.

-to be continued-

AN - sorry about this update. not much happens but i hope you liked it. expect kris to start making his moves! and also manager hyung will come back!