Hello everyone! *waves*

First of all, I really want to say thank you for the encouraging comments. I really appreciate them so, again, thank you. And welcome again to new readers and subbies, I hope you like this story

This chapter is the continuation of Hyukjae's previous flashback. Enjoy ^^

Daeyoung was shocked. He gawked at Hyukjae with widened eyes. “W-what?”

“I love her.” He repeated. “I love your sister.” I love her too much. Hyukjae turned around slowly and pressed a tight smile. “That’s why. Now can you let me go? Nana needs me.”

Daeyoung slowly loosened his grip around Hyukjae’s arm, his expression was lost. He stared at the ground still couldn’t grasp what the other guy just said. “T-then why did you... leave?”

Hyukjae heaved out a sigh, causing the cut on the corner of his lips to sting a little from the breath. “Seems like I can no longer keep this only with myself anymore.” He mumbled softly to himself. He smiled at the dumbfounded Daeyoung. “I think I’ll have some explanation to tell you. But can that wait?”

Daeyoung lifted his head up, he looked at Hyukjae as if he just talked with native language.

“I really can’t stand her looking so lifeless and alone there.” Hyukjae said still keeping his smile. “I hope I can wake her up. She can’t keep sleeping there, you know.”

Daeyoung snapped out of his thoughts. Even though he still couldn’t understand anything, he knew Hyukjae might be the only reason that could pull his sister out of her unconsciousness. He nodded hesitantly.

“Wish me luck, dude.” Hyukjae chuckled and started walking back to the hospital. His exterior might be calm and collected, but deep inside his heart was hammering in anxiety, in fear. He didn’t know what he would do if Nayoung couldn’t wake up.

On his way to her treatment room, pairs of eyes were on him. A paramedic offered to bring him to the nearest pharmacy for the injuries on his face but he politely refused to go there. He needed to do something far more important than healing the gashes on his face.

He stood in front of the room again. Room 104. He shivered when he inwardly read her name tagged on the door.

Gulping down the agitation, he grabbed the door knob and softly turned it. He pulled out a warm smile as he pushed the door opened. There, he saw her again. Still motionless, still pale. It hurt him so much that she looked so dead.

“Hey there,” he whispered. With shaky legs he made his way to her bed.

The sight of her features was getting clearer in his eyes. Her face was almost paler than the white pillow under her head. Her lips didn’t look as pink as it normally did.

Hyukjae swallowed again and took a seat beside her bed. Tremblingly, he took her hand and held it gently. She looked so fragile. The only thing that made him feel relieved was the fact that her hand was still as warm as usual.

“Nana-yah,” he called softly. His eyes went up from her hand to her pale face. If only those sparkly brown eyes would stare back at me now... “How’s your day today?”

He stared intently at her face, hoping her eyes would magically flutter open or her brows would twitch. The question was the one that he had always been asking her whenever they met each other after school, and he was dying for her response now. He sighed when she just stayed still.

“Boring, isn’t it?” He skimmed his thumb on the back of her hand. “Daeyoung said you’ve been... sleeping for four days now. If I were you, I would have suffered a great neck pain. But since I know you’re a heavy sleeper, I know you can stand with it.” He snickered bitterly. “But it’s been 4 days. It’s been too long for a sleep, don’t you think?”

The soft breathing of Nayoung was her only reply for his monologues. She really looked dead, but the sound of her heartbeat coming from the electrocardiograph told him otherwise. The constantly beeping machine was the only thing that let him knew she was still alive.

“Yah,” he tugged on her hands. “Do you know that I’m mad at you now?”

Hyukjae cleared his throat. A huge invisible lump was forming there making his voice shake.

“You’re not listening to me. Just a year ago I told you to take care of yourself. But now here you are, laying on a hospital bed.” he gripped onto her hand firmly. “Do you know I nearly got a heart attack every second when I went here?”

He felt his tears start to form. It prickled his eyes so much that he failed to keep the composed expression on his face any longer. It was just brought to his mind; every second he spent on his way here was a torture.

“Why would you do that, Nana-yah?” his jaw was clenched hard while his voice sounded really weak. “Why didn’t you move away when the car was speeding towards you? I thought I taught you better to look around before crossing a street. I can’t always be there holding your hand and helping you out to cross the street.”

He slowly broke out a pained whimper. Even acting strong in front of an unconscious girl was too hard for him. His head was pounding like mad.

“I really don’t know what to say better than this, but I’m sorry.” He said. “I’m sorry for being weak. For being stupid. For not having any control for things around us.”

Silence came into the room when Hyukjae took a pause. He remembered he promised himself not to cry since the day he chose the decision to leave.

But then it hit him with a bang. He realized that even the strongest guy had to cry if the burden became too agonizing.

“It must have been so hard for you. I can understand that, Nana-yah. I can.” He told her slowly. He raised his hand to the side of her face. “I’m sorry I couldn’t be there for you when things became worse, when uncle and aunty decided to separate their ways. I’m sorry that your hard works to get enrolled into Seoul University became wasted. It’s my fault. I took some decisions too inconsiderately.”

He stopped talking. He shouldn’t be breaking down there beside her. He would only make her condition worse.

“Baby,” he really missed calling her this. He stood up from the seat slowly leaning closer to her. He stared down at her face with a smile before placing a long, soft kiss on her bandaged temple. He took his seat again and caressed her cheek. “You really should wake up. I hate talking alone. I know I’m chatty, but I would look stupid if I you keep not responding me.” He tried cracking out a joke. He sighed in weariness and smiled again. “I’m sorry I didn’t bring a piano here. I should’ve brought one, right? Stupid me. How about I hum a song to you?”

The end of his voice was breaking again. For the countless time he cleared his throat. “The song is your favorite. You said you loved it, you said the song could connect us. So you have to like this song. I can’t guarantee my voice wouldn’t quiver though... but if you want to laugh at it or protest my hoarse voice, then you should wake up, alright?”

He brought her hand up and sealed his pinky around hers. “There. You’ve promised me you’d wake up. If you don’t, I’ll punish you by...” he thought for a minute and sighed. He knew he didn’t have the heart to trouble her more. “Aish, I don’t know how to punish you. Maybe if you don’t wake up, I’d just completely stop humming or playing piano in front of you.” he threatened, knowing if she really heard this she would be sulking over it endlessly.

But even her sulk only made him miss her more.

“Just... wake up. Please.”

Hyukjae took a deep breath and started humming. It was a serenade. The song he played for her on the day he confessed to her. It still gave him sparks.

The sun was starting to set. A beautiful gradation of red and orange streamed through the window from the setting sun. It was calm and peaceful. But as his voice became more husky, it was getting hard to keep it that way. Tears were already filling up his eyes again. He knew he’d lose it. He ended the song halfway when a sob was choked out of his throat.

He couldn’t even end the song properly.

“I’m sorry.” He hung his head low, letting it to fall on her shoulder. Before he knew it tears had started flowing freely out of his eyes. “I’m sorry, Nana-yah. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” He kept repeating it like a broken tape. Well he, himself was practically broken.

He didn’t know he missed her this much. He didn’t know the pressure would be this much.

For a few minutes he allowed the emotion to take over himself. He let his guard down completely, not a single layer was covering the true Lee Hyukjae. He was weak and broken and tired. Spending a moment with the girl that meant the world to him wouldn’t hurt. Leaving her alone would.

Suddenly, he heard someone clearing their throat. He rose up from his seat and turned around, finding a guy around his age standing by the door. He seemed younger than him by a year or two. He was looking at Nayoung.

“Sorry, I’m just coming to...” his voice trailed off when he saw Hyukjae. He seemed terrified with what he saw. “Hey, are you okay?” he finally asked.

Hyukjae observed him carefully. He never knew this guy. Who was he? Nayoung’s school mate?

“I’m fine.” Hyukjae nodded. He felt a little uncomfortable with the younger boy’s stare on him. The wounds on his face must have been the reason of that horrified stare. But he honestly couldn’t care less with that. He shifted his gaze to somewhere else, but soon something caught his attention. The boy was bringing a bouquet of flowers with him. “I’m sorry but... who are you?”

“Oh, I-I’m...” apparently the question had taken the younger boy aback. There seemed to be something that he contemplated with whatever the answer he was going to give to him. Hyukjae tensed up even more, somehow waiting for his answer was making him feel uneasy. “I’m her friend.” He finally said in confidence. “And you are...?”

Friend? A guy friend? Possessiveness tingled Hyukjae’s nerves. Nayoung was never close to any other boys beside him, her brother, and Donghae. And the scrutinizing stare from the younger guy seemed to have snapped something in him.

“I’m her boyf-” he stopped abruptly, realizing what he was about to say. He had no rights to claim himself as her boyfriend anymore, because he no longer was. He turned away feeling angry at his own decision to let go of her. “I-I’m her cousin.”

The boy blinked awkwardly. “Oh, uhm, annyeonghaseyo.”

“Annyeonghaseyo,” Hyukjae nodded.

He saw the boy looking away to Nayoung. He couldn’t help but notice the awestruck expression on the boy’s face when his eyes were on her. Hyukjae gulped. This was not the first time he saw another guy admiring the features of his girl- his exgirlfriend, but somehow this time, he felt threatened. 

It's you the one that had let her go, Hyukjae. He reminded himself.

The shock on the boy’s face interrupted his internal regret. “S-she... h-her hand...!” he exclaimed loudly.

Hyukjae hurriedly turned back to Nayoung, his eyes widening also. He saw her fingers moving slightly. A big smile slowly pulled the corners of his lips. He wanted to scream in relief but he was too speechless about that. He stepped closer to her, but once he saw her eyelids slowly fluttering open, he stopped abruptly. Something held him back.

The smile was quickly diminishing as reality hit him. He couldn’t do this. Another hurried decision from him, he didn’t know what would happen again to Nayoung and her family’s corporation.

Hyukjae jabbed his teeth down on his lower lip, causing the blood to leak out of the cut again. He closed his eyes momentarily. Making up his mind had never been this hard, but... he knew he had to.

“I have to go.” He spoke curtly leaving the room.

“W-wait, she’s just regaining her consciousness now! Don’t you want to-”

Hyukjae stopped walking, his shoes screeching against the hospital floor. “I-I need to go. Just tell her that I...” I love her. I’ve been loving her and will always be.

But he knew it better that he shouldn’t tell her this. If he said this to her and then just leave her like that, the words would only break her down even more.

Tears burned his eyes yet again. Tears of fear and anger.

Why is it so scary just to confess your feelings? I love her. But why does it take so many consequences for me just to say that? He clenched his fists once again, his body trembling. I’m sorry, Nana. But would you wait for me?

“Nothing. Forget it.” He continued walking away. His feet weighed tons of concrete.

“But-”

“O-Oppa,” he could faintly hear her voice.

He was close to falling on his knees at that moment but he quickly pulled himself together. He kept walking, silently exhaling a huge relief. Finally you wake up, Nana-yah. He felt a tinge of happiness inside, his heart was suddenly becoming much, much lighter than before.

Now that Nayoung had gained her consciousness, he felt he could leave with without that much burden.

Hyukjae continued walking down the hallway until he saw Daeyoung standing in front of a room waiting for him. He let out a small smile and greeted him.

“Yah,” he couldn’t contain his happiness inside. “Your sister’s awake now.”

Daeyoung lifted his head and looked at him with wide eyes. “S-she is?”

Hyukjae nodded. “I worked some wonders on her.” He tried to melt down the tension between them.

Daeyoung blinked a few times, his eyes became teary. He smiled gratefully at Hyukjae before rushing to her room, but stopped midway to turn back around. “Get those wounds treated in the emergency unit. You look like a gangster. You need some stitches. Wait for me there.”

Hyukjae flinched. I look like a gangster? He found it ironic, the one who spilled that to him was the one who beat him up almost senselessly.

Daeyoung began running again, but once again, he turned around. “If you leave again I’ll kill you, Lee Hyukjae! And I’m not kidding with that!”

Hyukjae just nodded. He watched his best friend disappearing when he rounded a corner. He emitted a small smile, stuffing his hands into his pockets. With a light sigh he walked toward the emergency unit. Only now he could feel how stinging the wounds on his face were.

Half an hour later, Daeyoung came back to the emergency unit. He was only half expecting Hyukjae to still be there since he could’ve just leave anytime, but to his relief, he didn’t.

He saw Hyukjae sitting on one of the hospital beds inside the emergency room, looking out the window as if an interesting parade was performing out there. His cuts had been treated, bandages were applied here and there. Daeyoung felt a bit suffocated by guilt. Maybe he shouldn’t have gone too hard on him.

Before Daeyoung could even call him, Hyukjae had noticed his presence. He looked at Daeyoung’s expression and his face fell immediately.

“W-what happened?” he choked. Daeyoung’s face screamed weariness.

“She was being a struggling mess.” Daeyoung told him and took a seat beside the bed.

Hyukjae’s heart dropped and was consumed by the stomach acid. “What do you mean?”

Daeyoung shot him an exhausted look. “She thought Kyuhyun was you,” he said slowly. “And then when she realized he wasn’t you, she went all frightened and scared with him. The doctor said it probably was because of the trauma.” Hyukjae hung his head again. “But she’s now calmed down by a sedative injection or something. Poor boy was shocked by her response with his presence there.” Daeyoung chuckled.

Hyukjae took a moment to try to keep his calm. He knew he was in the blame for all that had happened. The trauma was probably not because of the car accident. It could be because he left.

“I’m sorry.” Hyukjae spoke softly, almost muted. He didn’t dare to look at him.

Daeyoung nodded. “You’ve brought my sister back to life again, anyway.” He said. The way he spilled it was like Nayoung were really close to death earlier. But Daeyoung meant what he said. He was indeed scared, he was afraid his sister wouldn’t be back into life again.

The emergency room was deserted, the beds lining up in the room weren’t all occupied. Only a few nurses walked in and out the door. It was quiet again after the two guys talked. However, it wasn’t the type of quietness that anyone would want to keep. Tense was one of the reasons why.

Hyukjae gripped onto the edge of the bed, feeling agitated. He knew he had owed his best friend an explanation. A long, complicated explanation, that is. But he didn’t know how to word it out. How to make things sound more simple and easier to understand.

“You can talk to me, Hyukjae.” Daeyoung suddenly said, breaking him off of his thoughts. Being Hyukjae's best friend since they were toddlers made him know that there must have been something wrong. Something really wrong had happened. He then laughed in amusement. “Damn, I sound like a counseling teacher but really, you can talk it out to me.”

Hyukjae let out a dry laugh. But deep inside, he was confused, not knowing where to start. He couldn’t really remember where everything actually began falling apart. 

Sorry if this chapter ended so randomly, but I think it'll be too long if I continue. Anyways, everything will be unveiled in the next chapter. But since it's now 1 AM here and I'm so sleepy, I think I'll update it in a few hours or something. Wait for it ^^