"I'm hurting myself by continuing what we have been doing. But I love you and so it will be like this; you be happy and I be sad, happy, angry, miserable,  even a loser or whatever." Yoona Im (The Bad Teacher)

 The quote is another one of my faves from Yoona. What are yours?

 Upcoming is a short chapter of Yoonas seriously complex thoughts, short. And so my author note has to be long. Hahaha! For now, read it guys.

 It’s a chapter called 'End of the Rainbow'

 What's in the end of the rainbow?

 A pot of gold.

End of the Rainbow 112

 I locked my door. No mom I don't wanna eat! I'm not hungry. I just wanna lie down on my bed made for this one moment. I looked up to the ceiling, why do I do this often? Is Ada Wong up in the ceiling? No she ain't. But Ms. Jung is!

 Ms. Jung..

 "None of your business."

 Those words, they keep repeating in my head. Ms. Jung, how can you be so cruel? Did you know you broke my ever so fragile heart? I held my forehead, somehow my head aches. Why am I feeling like this, when clearly it was my fault? Jessica warned you, Yoona. There's no love and stress, it was all and pleasure; just play time. Now you're broken hearted, being so emotional and sad when all along you we're to blame. You believed in something that never existed between you two, and now you're all depressed. Very smooth, Yoona. Very smooth.

 Hehe~ Why do you have to be so beautiful, sweet, caring, ever-loving yet cold at the same time? Now look what you have done! You made me give faith in such thing that made heroes in horror movies die; love . Love is something I never considered up till now, I never thought it was even possible for me. Nobody would want a loser like me, who would be interested in a girl who fails in school, doesn't have friends, doesn't know fashion, make-up or styling and only knows video games. Now looking back, Jessica made me feel this love thing. It hurts, it's like accidentally deleting your save from your memory card. If only I could delete it like that. But I can't.

 Jessica, do you know how much I've grown to love you? Maybe if I could, I wouldn't have been such an idiot and treated our relationship like how you instructed; all for and pleasure. I would, if I could but I cannot. I have come to the point that I care for you badly it hurts. To the point where even if it hurts, I cannot walk away. There is no return.

 I am angry. I am angry at you, for choosing him. Not over me, you deserve someone else better. I don't stand a chance for you but I know the best for you because I love you. And thus, I want you happiness and no tears, I believe love should be shared and not one-sided for that; whoever is for you, he should cry when you do, be happy when you are, or even curse when you curse. I'm no expert in love but I know I'm hurting myself by continuing what we have been doing. But I love you and so it will be like this; you be happy and I be sad, happy, angry, miserable,  even a loser or whatever. Oh and one ironic sh-t is; I could die if I don't see you, it is a reason to go on.

 I curled up to the side of my bed. Everything's so confusing and hard. Yoona, just accept the fact that you two are nothing, zero and nothing more.

 I closed my eyes, maybe somehow the pain will go away when I wake up. If I even do wake up that is. Oh I sound too emotional do I? I won't die don't you worry guys! Well who worries about me anyways?

 Nighty night, Yoong.

 "Yoona!" Jessica looks so heavenly in her casual clothing. Blue polo and black pants, so simple yet so attractive. She should be like this often. "15 minutes late, Are you mad? Really sorry!" She clasped her two hands, pouting and pleading. So adorable.

 "It's okay. You are worth the wait, babe." I told her, well it’s a fact. Jessica is worth it, worth more than anything and everything. "So where to gorJess?" I stood up from my seat and gave her the coffee I bought her earlier.

 "Thanks, babe. Oh, where to? Hmm.." She smirked and pulled me near her lips. "Paradise." We both laughed. Oh Sica, you never change. "Can you take me there?" She asked cutely. What can I do? But to grant her request, of course! "Then paradise it is." I held her hand tight, so smooth and soft. She clung on my arm and together we walked, not minding who will see us.

 "Yoona, come close babe." She told me to lend my ear. 

 "I love you." She whispered and gave me a smile. A smile glowing inside this dark theater. We're watching a film entitled, paradise. Jessica had always wanted to see this film.

 "I love you too." So much.

 Dreaming about stuffs like this made me realize, it was all just an illusion. A fantasy of how I wanted us to be that my mind kicked me back to reality. It always does! Jessica Jung is my beautiful English teacher, I am her loser slash loner student, Yoona Im. In my dreams, you love me, in my dreams were in love. Everything is happy, unicorns, cloud nines and rainbows. If we were even together, I wonder what will Yuri say about us? What about your parents? My parents? What about your job? I can't believe I'm thinking like this. Yoona, you’re all too serious with your love on her!

 I am..

 I guess so. I see now that I have loved Jessica to the point where I loved her beyond how I loved myself. Now look what it has done to me, it all crashed down, dragging my interest in everything with it to trash. I can't even eat nor play video games! Bye cloud nine, bye unicorns, bye fairies, bye Peter Pan. And yet I don't believe in fairies. So now I see, that's how our relationship was, nothing but a myth, a fairy tale, a pile of lies. Come on Yoona Im! Yoona.. Be strong.

 Dreams in paper planes, eventually they will go down. It started with a smile, happy as it flown and when it crashes down it can lead to its destruction or another flight. Can I take another flight after my wings have been broken? Is there any chance that I can land on your hand?

 Should I?

 I need to fly and try once more. Try and find the end of the rainbow. The pot of gold, so I'm a leprechaun now. Good thing I'm not a fairy, they're like so uncool and sissy.

 My pot of gold, Ms. Jung.

 How can we ever happen Jessica? Will it always be a dream? I wish I can cry, I wish I was braver, I wish you'd hear my thoughts, I wish you can feel my heart, my love.

 Blocking the light from the bulb in my room, it somehow tells me I should be strong; as no tears could come out of my eyes. It shows I'm fine but I'm dying. I'm in love yet I'm hurting. Why is Loser Yoona Im so dramatic? Anyone listening to me, maybe already annoyed with my dramatic sh-t. Oh well.. Nobody listens to me anyways.

 Time to sleep.

 Ms. Jung, good night. A loser loves you dearly, don't you worry.

 Yoongie said no one cares about her or no one wants to listen to her, we do! Right right? Oh men, our Yoongie is badly hurt yet she still stands up and loves Ms. Jung. I salute her love!

 Yoonas display of love is marvelous and romantic, just hope Ms. Jung knows all of these; words like these can melt any heart. Why isn't the ice princess melting yet?

 Next chapter is chapter 13. I'll give you guys a short shot on Jessica's POV.

Chapter 13 - (Sunday Ache 113)

 Jessica's POV Preview :

 "They should pay more for preservation of water than paying too much on expensive coffee mixed with a sack of sugar.

 Wow, I do fit to be a teacher, guess they're quite right.

 I checked my phone again. Yoona's flooding my phone, saying she's lost. How the hell did she got lost in a mall near our school? Damn kid. Yoona's pretty much innocently stupid, isn't she?

 Somehow.. I feel an ache, hearing you call someone else beautiful.."

 So for now, let me know what you guys think: D and, till next update!

 -choikufu*resting*