It was not like Sehun wanted to surprise his boyfriend or anything, not when the older one was already in a misery from his mother’s condition. It was not what he had planned or discussed with Yixing in advance either when the idea of giving Luhan a visit had come across his mind. Therefore he had informed the Chinese about his arrival and wrinkled his forehead as he didn’t hear the excitement on the other side of the line like he expected. But Sehun thought it’s due to the pressure and anxiety Luhan was suffering so he just shrugged it off and went back to pack his stuffs.

Although he had tried his best to rearrange his schedule, he couldn’t make it any sooner than five days after the day Luhan got the phone call. From what he heard, the surgery went pretty well and his mother was already on the way of recovery but there was a slight hint of worry in Luhan’s voice that he couldn’t get out of his mind. That’s why he really looked forward to seeing his boyfriend to make sure everything was fine.

However, at a particular point, Sehun guessed sometimes God must have found it very interesting to play a trick on him.

The reservation he had made at the hotel somehow was not put in the system. He asked the receptionist to check, twice, as calmly as he could but there’s still nothing recorded on the computer. And even though she politely said sorry for the technical problem, she couldn’t do anything but calling for him a taxi to another hotel.

He could have found somewhere else to stay if he made a phone call to Luhan and asked for a name along with address. But Sehun was brought up and taught pretty well about self-reliance. He was the type of rather struggling to find way home alone than asking his nursery teacher to send him home when his mothers were out of town.

The young Korean boy was about to hit the road when he suddenly realized he had to buy some flowers as a gesture of caring. He spun around, walking towards the counter with a small smile at the corner of his lips. He cleared his throat before practicing his accented English

“Err, excuse me. Can you tell me where nearby that I can buy flowers?”

 The female startled at his sudden request, she leaned in a bit and wrinkled her forehead to catch the key words of the whole sentence. It took her a moment to completely understand the situation

“Oh, flower? There is one shop two blocks from here.”

She reached out her hand to motion the direction for him but sensing the bewilderedness lingered on the latter’s face, she stepped out of her spot and signaled him to follow her to the front door.

“You see the Star Buck café over there?”

She pointed her index finger toward the crossroad and Sehun nodded his head, squinting a bit as the sun ray beamed at his eyes.

“Turn right at that corner, the flower shop is 50 meters away on the opposite.”

Flashing his genuine thankful smile, Sehun bowed at her politely and his heels, taking mental the guide he had just received.

Beijing was quite bigger and busier than Seoul and the traffic was exact to what Yixing had told him. What made him nervous was the warning his hyung had given him about the language barrier which could cause many problems and he didn’t want to bother Luhan for being an interpreter even though he knew the latter would be more than happy to do that.

Luckily, the whole ride to the hospital was quite safe to be honest except for the fact that he couldn’t get through Luhan. But again, he found another reasonable explanation on his own and convinced himself that it’s okay to just go straight to the hospital with the info Luhan had given him two days ago.

Holding the bouquet tightly against his chest, Sehun reached out to push the button of the fifth floor, humming a random melody popped up on his mind. He was busy adjusting his clothes when the door of elevator opened. His jaw dropped as he saw Luhan was standing in front of him with messy hair, pale skin, black eye bag due to the lack of sleeping and arm wrapping around a young girl’s shoulder whose almost weight was leaned on the Chinese boy.

They stared at each other for a moment before the elevator started to close and Sehun was snapped back to his conscience by an exclamation of a female’s voice. He quickly kept pushing the button until the door opened again, revealing his boyfriend talking to that girl in foreign language that he couldn’t understand a word.

“Sehun ah.”

Luhan called out his name as he helped the girl slowly step inside, a mixture of happiness, anxiety and surprise could be heard from his voice.

“How can you get here?”

Maybe it just meant like how it sounded. Maybe Luhan truly wanted to know how he got to the hospital all by himself whereas they had agreed to meet at the hotel and Luhan would take him here. But to Sehun’s ear, it said more than that. He could see how Luhan’s eyes quickly shifted to that girl before met with his, how the latter stayed away from his personal space, something never happened before when they were at the same room, how his hand reached out to touch him like an instinct but then withdrew almost immediately as if it was not allowed.

Something was wrong

His mind told him so but Sehun knew for sure Luhan had his reason so he just let it aside and played along with the other.

“Something happened with my reservation at the hotel. Besides I couldn’t get you on phone so I thought it would be easier for us if I meet you here and then you’ll find me another place to stay.”

Luhan scratched his neck apologetically

“Oh, I must have left my phone somewhere at my mother’s room.”

“It’s okay. I’m here already.”

The unease at the corner of Luhan’s eyes turned into a small smile as he caught a glance at the flower in Sehun’s hand.

“Is this for my mom?”

Being startled at the changing topic, the younger one sputtered a bit as soon as he realized what Luhan was asking.

“Ah….this? Yes, yes it is. I don’t know what to bring so…”

“It’s perfect, Sehun ah.”

The little “ting” signaled they arrived at their chosen floor cut off their conversation. On the whole way following Luhan to his mother’s room, Sehun couldn’t help but wondering who that girl was. It’s clearly that she was a patient but what Luhan had to do with her was really the question. He didn’t want to sound like a possessive boyfriend who always nagged about whom his baby deer was friend with but as much as he concerned Luhan didn’t seem to have any interest in girl so this one must be very special. And if something or someone was special to Luhan, Sehun needed to know the full story behind.

There was just an elder woman lying on the bed when they came in the room, who Sehun assumed was Luhan’s mother. He chose to stand close to the door while the Chinese boy was helping that girl sit down on a chair near the bed and said something to both of them. It’s not long before Luhan’s mother noticed there was a stranger in the room. Sehun knew it’s time for him to make his appearance as he saw Luhan turned his head toward his spot and smiled to tell him to come close.

Nervously making a small moving, he could feel his hands were sweating. This was the first time he met his boyfriend’s family and to be honest it could be counted as a big step in their relationship so far.

 He bowed politely as he made the eye contact with the elder woman, tried hard not to stammer on his own name.

“Hello, nice to meet you. I’m Sehun”.

He stopped in the middle, didn’t know whether it’s necessary to introduce him as Luhan’s boyfriend as well. He automatically exchanged a questioning look with the said boy, hoping the other understand what was on his mind.

Taking that as a hint, Luhan quickly did his job as an interpreter, stretched his hand towards the Korean boy and said in Mandarin. Judging from the weak smile curved on her lips and the a little bit long conversation Luhan was making with his mother, Sehun knew he didn’t have to say anything else.

He handed the Chinese flowers and whispered even though no one in this room would understand what he said except for Luhan.

“Tell her I wish her fully recover soon.”

“I already did”

Luhan grinned back at the surprised expression on Sehun’s face. It’s not like he’s going to let his boyfriend standing here for any longer so he planned to make it as quick as possible. He didn’t want his mom to suspect anything of him and the younger. He needed to let her rest for her own condition.

Therefore, the moment he’s done with arranging the flowers, he excused himself and pulled Sehun outside for a more private place to talk.

*********

Shifting continuously in his seat, Sehun nervously stared at the back of Luhan standing at the counter to order their drinks. The whole thinking something is wrong repeated rapidly inside his head. Luhan never behaved like this, all calm and quiet. The baby deer he knew was an active and cheerful type, not to mention that he was the clingiest person he had known in his life.

His observation was cut off as Luhan put down two cup of hot chocolate in on the table and took a seat on the opposite side. However, the awkwardness he felt before was washed away by Luhan’s loving smile at him, even though he could see the tiredness lingered at the corner of his eyes.

“I miss you Sehun ah.”

Yes, he truly did. He wanted to have his boyfriend nearby to wrap an arm around him when he was praying for his mother, to kiss away the weariness that was weighing down on his heart. It’s so damn hard to be all alone through this situation.

“I miss you too.” Sehun reached out to put his hand upon the latter’s one and gave it a slight squeeze “But I’m here already. I’ll give you my strength.”

The Chinese boy laughed at the sweetness and it shocked to him that it felt like he hadn’t laughed freely like this for a long time. And that also reminded him of what he had to tell the other.

“So….” before he could make any move, Sehun spoke up again, his voice was filled with worry “Is there anything that I’m supposed to know?”

He knows something is up

Luhan swallowed thick at the stare Sehun was shooting him right now. It looked like the other could see through his mind and his heart also.

“Uhm…yes.” he hesitantly took a sip on his chocolate, hoping the sweet liquid would give him enough courage “It’s about my mom.”

The Korean boy narrowed his eye brows in confusion, didn’t expect Luhan’s mother would be the main topic here.

“What happens? Isn’t she on her recovery?”

Luhan stole a slow glance at the outside the window, recalling what the doctor had said to him.

“The surgery was good but it didn’t completely eliminate the possibility of a relapse. Besides the doctor said after this she’s easy to have high blood pressure. We have to be really careful around her, try not to make her emotional.”

Sehun stayed silent for a good minute to get what was really under those words Luhan had just said. So that meant their relationship couldn’t be open to his mother, may be to his father too or the whole China as well. But if it’s just so, why he had a hunch of what coming next was really a bad news.

“Okay…” he tightened his lips, eyes more focused on the person on the other side of the table “I see what you mean and I don’t mind at all about pretending to be just a friend of yours in front of your family, even to that girl who I don’t think belongs to any of your relatives if you want.”

“Thank you Sehun ah….”

Luhan was about to explain that Mei Mei was just a daughter of his mom’s friend who had dominated her bone marrow when the other cut off his sentence by holding up his hand.

“I’m not finished.” Sehun bit his lips uneasily. He didn’t want to sound like he was questioning his baby deer but his feeling never failed him “I don’t mind but you have to tell me what’s on your mind, like really.”

Luhan’s eyes opened wide for a split of second before softened a bit at the thought that he couldn’t hide anything from Sehun, even though it’s not his final decision yet.

“I’m thinking of moving back to China after graduating.” he slowly exhaled a long breath “I want to be by her side, to take care of her. But I still have….”

His voice trailed off as he looked straight into the younger’s eyes. This really tore him inside plus all the anxiety and lack of sleeping, his head couldn’t work thoroughly. The vision in front of him became all blurry and the other quickly caught the rest of the sentence.

 “Okay, okay. I get it. We’ll work thing out. Trust me.”

Sehun stretched out a hand to grab his again, this time the pressure was a little bit harder to assure Luhan that they would find a way best for his mother and their relationship as well, even though frankly he didn’t know where to begin.