#14 The video part 2

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No one said a word,most of the boys were staring shockingly over at Kris as their eyes would occasionally glance over to the guilt ridden Tao,he hadn't meant for that kiss to happen,he honestly didn't. He had been depressed about his crush on Baekhyun and gotten drunk. Tao had never been good at holding his liquor,he never drank to be honest.

And smoke from cigerettes made him feel like vomiting,all it took to ruin everyones lives was one mistake in made in a drunken depression,Baekhyun stared at him with a stone expression,but he didn't look angry anymore,Baekhyun merely looked like he was thinking over everything that happened. Thank god,Tao thought. He couldn't take it if Baekhyun hated him.

Kris was just staring at the crying boy on the video,watching as he tried to calm himself down from the confession he had just made,Kris then took the chance to look over the boy's state. How had they not noticed the blood on his knee,soaking through his jeans.

The bruising split on his lip indicating he had been punched,what exactly happened to Chanyeol before this video was made? Kris turned to look at Chanyeol's parents who were both just looking away from the video in shame,not able to look at the suffering in their boy's face. Kris then thought over the confession,how did he feel about Chanyeol?

He knew he was always over protective of the younger boy,but he never considered Chanyeol in a romantic light before,until Suho came along. Kris noticed he had started to feel jealous whenever Chanyeol would make plans with the other boy. At first he figured it was because Chanyeol was his best friend. His.

Not Baekhyun's,not Kai or Kyungsoo...his.

But then he realized he never got jealous over Baekhyun whenever Baekhyun would say. 'That's my best friend Chanyeol'.  Suho never even said that himself,but Kris always felt like Suho was threatening to take Chanyeol away from him,he wouldn't let it happen.

Unknown to Kris,Suho held affections elsewhere,Suho loved Chanyeol like a brother,but that was all. As a matter of fact,Suho thought as he glanced over at the silent Chinese boy standing in the corner,looking at Kris and Tao with pity,Lay felt someone looking at him and noticed Suho,he grinned a little,Suho returned it.

They all broke out of their thoughts once Chanyeol on the video had collected himself.

"Sorry,I just thought you guys needed to know,I feel a lot better now that you all know my feelings. I don't actually know what happened between you two. But Tao promise me you'll take care of Kris,you too Baekhyunnie,Kris hyung is an idiot,he can be even more oblivious than I am sometimes...and for goodness sake Baekhyunnie get yourself a boyfriend and stop worrying about setting up Kai and Kyungsoo." Chanyeol's bloodshot eyes stared into camera for a minute as if daring Kris to argue then smiled as he finished his sentence. Kai and Kyungsoo looked at one another before blushing a bright red.

"Suho hyung please look out for Kai,he can be a little bit of a troublemaker,Kyungsoo can't handle him by himself,Minseokkie hyung.. I know we didn't get chances to talk much,but you are the oldest,please take care of everyone,but don't forget to look after yourself.

Chen Chen....Yixingie... you two continue to make fun of Kris hyung and make him laugh a lot!" By now the boys were holding back tears,Kris's eyes were watering,he knew it was getting close.

"Luhan hyung,Sehunnie...you two drove me crazy with your constant lovey dovey public displays but it was one of the only normal things I actually looked forward to on  those horrible school days. So you two keep driving everyone crazy with your nasty cuddling."
Luhan was crying into Sehun's shoulder ,Sehun was Luhan's back in comfort,Sehun his lip and blicked tears away.

Chanyeol then stopped as if in thought and looked down for a moment . "I'm reaching the end of my message now,but I had a few more messages."

Chanyeol looked back up,flicking his long redish blond hair out of his face. "Mom,dad...I love you both very much....I ..I just couldn't handle the pressure dad was putting on me to be like him,wanting me to move out and halfway across the city with him and a woman I never even met.

And I couldn't keep picking up after those drinking habits mom,I was trying to support us but everytime I managed to scrape up a little money,you'd spend it on soju and beer..."

"Mom I sincerely hope you stop drinking and find a man that is worthy of you,despite the fact you were a drinker,you were actually very caring towards me and I'll always appreciate it,I love you mom." His mom's sobs sounded out through the room,Kris could vaguely hear her muttering and blubbering. "I'm sorry" over and over.

"Dad...let's face it,you were a bad father and an even worse husband,but if there was one thing you did right,was being there for me when I was little,I don't know what changed you,you were such a kind and caring man...but that woman happened and she changed you....for the worst.

I can only hope you find who you're supposed to be dad...I love you and I'll even forgive you one day,even if I am gone, but I don't think I'll ever find it in me to like you." His dad said nothing,just stared at his son's handsome face,memories taking over his thoughts,memories of when Chanyeol was little,memories of when they were a happy family,remembering the day when he was born,his little body staring up at him with such curious innocence.

He remembered the day they brought him home from the hospital,he would carry Chanyeol around the whole house,telling him what the rooms were for in the softest voice. He remember his first words,his first laughs,those first steps. His eyes watered when he remembered when Chanyeol was a curious little two year old,he could remember working on paperwork and hearing little pitter patter of feet running into his office,Chanyeol's little voice yelling. "Daddy!" He would smile and pick Chanyeol up and make airplane sounds as they 'flew' around the house with Chanyeol's bright laughter.

And it was with that last memory of his precious son ,did Chanyeol's father finally break down into full fledged tears. Chanyeol then smiled. "Kris hyung...do me a favor tell Mac and Hoya I'm sorry and that I thank them for everything,they've tried to do for me. I just could handle it."

He took a breath. "Sungyeollie...you better marry Myungsoo or I'm gonna haunt you! I know I could've lived with you,but to be honest I didn't want to burden you with that task. Love you cuz,you be strong and for gods sake please quit irritating Myungsoo before he breaks up with you!" Sungyeol chuckled a little at that,he was always driving his boyfriend bonkers.

Chanyeol took one last look at the window and then turned to the clock on the wall. "Dad should be back soon,mom said he was coming back,I hope to do this before he arrives..." He looked back at the camera and his lips,wincing a bit at the split.

"Kris hyung...don't blame yourself,meet someone you love and hold onto them with everything you got,if there is one thing I want,my one last wish,it's meet someone who will treat you right,if it's Tao,then that is good,because Tao is a great guy.

I love you Kris hyung,I can't explain why I do,that is something you can't explain. Love just hits you when you least expect it,but you can't control it,so if you ever feel anything,go for it.

Don't be like me and let it be kept in the dark,maybe if I had told you how I felt years ago,maybe if I told everyone how I was feeling about my problems,I wouldn't be sitting in this bedroom making a goodbye video. Just please take care of yourself,look after Bacon,my other idiotic half will need it.

You be strong Kris,you've always been strong...but you always seemed to let your anger control your emotions...please don't blame mom..or dad..or Suho,and please....PLEASE don't blame yourself,no one knew I would do this,I'm just tired ..I'm so tired hyung. I'm tired of waking up everyday and wishing I never woke up,I'm tired of watching families laugh and play in the park when my own family only screams at each other.

I can't bare to see you ignore me,unintentionally or not. I'm just tired. I do want you to always remember one thing."

Chanyeol took a pause. "And that is that no matter what happens to me when I am gone,if I'm in Heaven or hell...and no matter who you meet,marry or fall in love with you will always know that ,I ,Park Chanyeol love you Kris Wu." Chanyeol said it so quietly most of them had to strain to hear him,Suho even turned up the TV.

But Kris heard him loud and clear,Chanyeol really loved him. Chanyeol then smiled shakily as tears filled his bloodshot vision once more. "I guess this is it,goodbye guys...I love you all so much. Take care of one another and know this,it was never anyones fault,things just worked out this way." They could see tear drops fall from Chanyeol's face and he walked over to the camera and the screen cut to black.

Suho was about to look over to see how Kris was doing,but Kris was gone.

The front door wide open.