The day came where Sang Hee could be discharged from the hospital. Kyu Jong was more than impatient. He had to fly home the next day whether she could come or not, his next single needed to begin. So far he’d just penned some loose lyrics that could be for the ballad track he wanted to release.

Kyu Jong went to her ward while the family waited for them to come. He wondered how she was coping. The last week had been rather stressful for her and she didn’t seem to be affected. Or the mask she was wearing was secured with steel bolts.

When he came to where she was he found her dressed and her robe from the hospital folded neatly on the bed. She was now brushing her hair lifting up a section to sniff it.
“Hi are you ready to go?” She nodded and rose, like royalty. He came to her side for she wobbled a bit from not moving about. Linking her arm in his they left the hospital carrying the small travel bag in his spare arm which had held her life for the past week or so.

*

She was quiet in the car on the way to their house. Kyu Jong’s mum quickly told her that all her things had been packed except for what she needed for the rest of the day.
“It’s been good to see you, do come again soon.” All Sang Hee could do was agree with a small grunt.

“Do you want to come to our place for dinner?” His dad asked. “Eunah won’t be eating with us but you’re welcome to join us.”

“Thank you,” Kyu Jong showed his appreciation while at the same time hoping Sang Hee would be friendlier by then. 

Sang Hee showed no change in manner when they joined his parents for dinner. She did however brighten up when it was revealed the main meal was black wheat noodles which were her favourite. Kyu Jong just watched as she ate her share hungrily.

“Wow,” his father began. “The hospital food must taste pretty horrible.”

“Please have more,” she hadn’t even finished the first bowl but agreed. His mother chuckled; Kyu Jong didn’t know what to say. “Her appetite’s improved,” they commented. “And she isn’t as picky as she used to be.” Funny thing to say about a chef but it was true. His mother then asked him if he was ok.

“Aren’t you hungry Kyu Jong?” He’d barely touched his bowl. He nodded and started to eat some more.
“I think I’ve been too concerned over my wife.” He joked while trying to make up for just then.

While his mother and Sang Hee washed up Kyu Jong and his dad sat in the living room chilling with some wine. Sang Hee had meant to be resting however she didn’t want to so as a result she’d taken the place of Kyu Jong in the kitchen, standing next to her mother in law, tea towel at the ready.

His father took a sip from his glass, leaned back against his chair and sighed. “So you’ll be leaving tomorrow morning?”

“Yes, at eight thirty.”

“Will she be well enough to go with you?” They both heard the warm laughter of women which made them look around the corner to where Sang Hee and mother were cracking up from something. Kyu Jong let a grin escape. “It looks as if she will.”

“Good,” his father took another sip before talking again. Kyu Jong had one as he listened. “Your wife, though cold on the outside at times, she’s a good person at heart. She doesn’t know how to express it well. You have to teach her.”

This statement rattled Kyu Jong, his hand with his drink shook for a moment. He placed it down to prevent an accident. “Father what do you—“

“—I got a call from a relative in Seoul a few months ago. Said he saw Sang Hee carrying boxes into the apartment opposite from where he lives.” He didn’t like the expression his dad carried; it was clouded with a serious expression. “I told him that couldn’t be possible. You live ten kilometres away from him.”

Kyu Jong couldn’t respond how he wished. He knew that explaining to his father would prove to be without fruit. He already knew what they’d tried to hide.

“I’m disappointed son. You should have told us that you were having problems. We would have tried to help, comfort you if worse came to worse.” His son lowered his head down to a degree, weighed down by shame.

“Good that you haven’t gone through with it.” His father added after a moment of silence passed. “Otherwise our earnings along with that of her family would have been a waste.” Kyu Jong just sat not moving. The chair squeaked as his dad rose to come over and give him a light pat on the back. He then proceeded to give a brief hug to his son. Kyu Jong received it without hesitation; his father didn’t give hugs often.

*

“Take care,” his mother waved to them as they walked back to their car. Kyu Jong and Sang Hee stood at the front door waving. They then went inside and looked around. The house had been cleaned, all the walls, floors were washed, the windows polished. The kitchen had been emptied of the food, the sink, oven; everywhere there had been food smelt and looked clean.

“It feels weird going home.” Sang Hee said. Kyu Jong took it as a cue to drape an arm around her shoulders. “It’s going to be weird being almost alone again.” Kyu Jong frowned.
“You won’t be alone.”

“My friend will be moving in with her boyfriend soon…”

“So you’ll come home right?” His voice quivered from a sudden anxiety. Sang Hee looked at him in the eyes. Surely she didn’t want to undo every single thing that they had managed to earn while together again. Kyu Jong wouldn’t have it.

“With me… Being the way I am it’s not going to be much good to you.”

“Sang Hee you’re not dying!” She spun around, a fierce look in her eyes.

“But I’m not myself am I?! Having me the way I am will just be a bother.” Kyu Jong shook his head furiously. All patience for her was beginning to wear thin.

“Please stop and listen. I want to help you I want to be there for you.”

“But I don’t need help!” Sang Hee yelled back. “I was fine way before I knew.”

 She stopped and shoved past him to go upstairs. Kyu Jong just stood there unable to decide whether it was safe to join her. He had a drink of water before going upstairs to join her.

Sang Hee kept away from her husband while he struggled to know what bugged her. He didn’t ask her what was wrong for the fact her dark glare kept him from talking. She was attractive yet at the same time also terrifying.

It came time for bed and she still barely said a thing. Kyu Jong decided that if she didn’t want to talk about it then he wouldn’t force her too. He knew from their marriage that she was better at being open about her feelings when she felt like it. So for the moment being he just waited and then settled down under the blankets with her closer to him than normal.

*

Kyu Jong woke, he couldn’t sleep. Everything didn’t feel as if it had really happened. This had to be a bad dream. But he knew that denying this would be stupid. Instead he lay back against the bed, staring at the ceiling. His eyes moved in their sockets to Sang Hee who was on her side facing away.

“Honey,” he hadn’t used that term of endearment for a while. “Can you sleep?” She didn’t answer. Maybe she was indeed in dreamland. He turned to prop himself up with his pillow. Carefully he leaned over to check her.

Why was her pillow wet?

A hand covered her face; soft sound of possible sobs came from her. He lifted her hand away. Indeed she was awake, tears streaming from her lovely eyes. All possible angst of her behaviour melted to bring about his compassionate, gentle side which then brought him next to her and a hand slowly her hair through fingers.

“Honey,” he cooed. “Why are you crying?”

“I…” She composed herself for a moment. “I’m so sorry…”

“Why,” he lowered his head down. “What are you sorry for?” She sniffed, lifting her head up a bit so she wasn’t talking into the pillow.

“…I lied to you.”

He didn’t understand. Or maybe he didn’t want to. He wrapped her in an arm, waiting for her. “I told you that I wanted to end the marriage because it wasn’t working out…” She sniffed, wiping her eyes. “But that wasn’t it… I fell ill at work. I went to the doctor without you knowing. He knew something was wrong I could see it; he wanted to call you, tell you that I needed testing. But I didn’t want that. I didn’t want things to change. So I left before he could refer me. I left and never went back.”

More tears came.

“I didn’t know what to do. He left messages on our answer machine. I deleted them, hoping that you would never know. But I couldn’t keep up… I couldn’t hide the fact I knew I may be sick. So I did what I thought I had to… I asked to end it.”

Now Kyu Jong felt like crying. He’d believed she didn’t love him, that the romance in their marriage had fizzled out and he couldn’t do anything to prevent it. It seemed like he’d drunken a bottle of sweet and sour sauce to now know he’d done nothing wrong.

He caught himself; he wiped his eyes with a hand. Sang Hee just started sobbing again, saying one phrase over and over again. “I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…”

“Honey,” with a catch in his voice he spoke to her. “I love you. I really do. I don’t want to lose you. I want to be with you whether you’re well or not well. Didn’t we promise that we would be there for each for better or for worse? Did you forget so easily?”

He swallowed, the emotions rising too fast. “I know I didn’t tell you this before but you’re the only person who didn’t shy away or become disgusted when I told you I had Hepatitis B. For once I had someone who didn’t care or even try to ask how or why I have it.” Kyu Jong noticed the catch in his voice as he said. “It may sound silly but that meant so much to me.”

A tear drop fell on a spot above her head. “I didn’t protect you or be your shield when you needed me to. Give me the chance to show you how much you can rely on me. Let me hear of your worries and your sorrows, let me at least hold you like I am holding you now. I won’t leave you. I won’t. I love you.”

He didn’t know if Sang Hee said yes or no but her sobbing increased so he could only hope that she would let him. He nestled up close to her, hugging her from behind with a gentle strength; strength to show that he meant every word of what he had said. Kyu Jong placed a kiss on the top of her head and then lay his head down, listening for her to settle down. He vowed he wouldn’t fall asleep until she did.

~*~

I welled up when I was writing the last part. The more I write this the more I fall for Kyu Jong and then I remember my bias is Hyung Jun hmmm.

A few chapters left to go. I hate ending it on an odd number so I will make it probably be 20 or 22 chapters long. Thank you all for reading once again.