Chapter 2
Infinitely Forever
Taeyeon sat on his chair in his room, staring at birds outside. The birds happily chirped, flew around. They seemed so free, living without any burden. He wish he could be like them. Flew around freely, visiting places and people he wanted.
“Good morning.” Palms were placed on his shoulders, but he didn’t bother to turn around. He lived with that voice for years.
“Morning.” He replied lazily. He didn’t know but he wasn’t in a good mood to have a little chit-chat even with a nice woman like Sooyoung.
“Birds ?” She sat beside him. He glanced at her. ‘Decent woman indeed.’ He thought. Her hands were on top of her lap, she was sitting straight.
“Yeah. Didn’t you say your shift ended last night ?”
She smiled. “I went here to check on some documents.”
“You still work on your research ?”
“Yes. I’ll be done with it in a few months, I guess.”
He smiled. Sooyoung was like his own daughter, since his own daughter disappeared with his husband a few years ago, and his son flew to US for his college, but he never came back to take care of him and her. It forced him to stay in this nursing home. Taeyeon patted her head. “That’s good. How’s your boyfriend ?”
“Boyfriend ? I’m single, Sir.” She blushed.
“Sir ? I told you to just call me Dad. You’re the one that told me that I’m like your own father.” He sulked and crossed his arms in front of his chest.
She laughed softly and leaned her head on his shoulder. “Alright, Dad.” They laughed together.
“How was last night ?” She asked him carefully, knowing that her was his sensitive topic.
“Hmm ? Last night ?”
Sooyoung took Taeyeon’s hand and squeezed it softly. “It’s okay if you don’t want to tell me. It’s your privacy...”
“It was good.” He turned his head to her and put his attention to the birds again. “She said that my hand was warm. She used to shoo me and calling for another nurse to get me out.”
Sooyoung knew it must be painful for him to see her like that. Everyone knew it well, that he loved her much more than he loved anything. His voice turned dreamy but shaky, as if he wanted to cry, when people asked him about her. She catched a glimpse of happiness in his eyes, though sorrow dominated the expression that reflected.
Beep. Beep.
Taeyeon turned away, the sound from Sooyoung’s phone was the same with the machines’ that connected to her body, and it hurt him, his eardrums. Sooyoung stood up to answer the call, and came back not so long after.
“My friend said the professor wants to meet me. I’ll be going, okay ?”
He nodded. “Take care. When will you visit here again ?”
“I’ll be here as soon as I finish with the professor. Don’t forget to eat your medicines.” She kissed his cheek and grabbed her bag.
“Don’t forget to introduce me your boyfriend.” He grinned.
“Dad !”
Taeyeon watched the slender woman walked away from him until her figure disappeared from his sight.
He turned his attention from Sooyoung to the garden in front of him. Her room was across, he could see her from the opened window. She was reading, but he couldn’t see what book it was. Maybe it’s the book he gave, since the cover had the same colour. Taeyeon couldn’t see everything very clearly nowadays, and he should carry the glasses everywhere and everytime.
He wanted to approach her so badly, that it ached his heart. The knives were stabbing him again and again, until it shattered into pieces. And sadly, he had to pick up those pieces, and her words would break his heart again. The cycle of his life.
She closed her book, and closed her eyes for a while. She opened them and turned her head to his way and smiled at him. Her crescent eyes sent him the most beautiful eye smile he’s ever known. Taeyeon sent her a smile, but little did she know, his smile had two sides. One side when he felt he’s jumping in joy, and the other side when he realized that her smile for him was the same smile she gave to people. Nothing special.
He always conviced himself that maybe she’s just need to be reminded how special he was to her, and how special she was to him. Maybe she acted like she don’t know him because it’s their anniversary and she wanted to give him a surprise. But years passed and she didn’t change a bit, and it made him unsteady. Did the years passed when they loved each other dearly were just an act or was she just play with him ? Is it really a disorder or maybe it's just a big lie ? He would come up with thousands hypothesis, made him tired of thinking further but his mind was still clouded by her. He was tired of thinking of their relationship, where they were going, with her condition. But all he wanted to think about was her, all he wanted to fill his mind with was her.
Taeyeon sighed. All she did was smiling but it made him go crazy. He was tired of the uncertainty, but he never felt so in love before. He took out some glossy papers from his pocket, and grazed his fingers on top of them. It was their photos, old photos. Taken when they thought the world was the most beautiful place to live in, and when two of them could do anything they want. When they were living as young souls, ready to roam the universe.
There was a photo when they went to America to visit her parents. She was hugging him happily, her parents grinning between them. He put the photo on the table and poured his attention to the next photo. It was when they had their first child, and it’s a boy. He remembered he was crying when he saw the baby, and her soft thumb wiped his tears away.
“I want to give him a name.” She smiled.
“What name ?”
“Changmin. Kim Changmin.” She gazed at the sleeping baby.
“Handsome.”
Changmin went to America almost ten years ago, left him with sorrow. He never wanted his son to stay away from his own father, but he convinced that he’d go back right after he finish everything. Ten years passed but Changmin didn’t give him any information where he was, his condition. He didn’t even know if he had married with someone or not.
The next photo made him clenching his fist tighter. It was when his daughter, Seohyun, got married to his husband. They all looked glad there, happy tears were visible on her face. But it was hell after that. Seohyun’s husband, Im Yoong, was a good man and he’s sure about that. A few months after the marriage, Yoong brought Seohyun with him and used job as an excuse. Taeyeon had told them that the couple could come back home at anytime, and he expected grandkids from them. But, Seohyun and Yoong was never coming back, nor gave him any news about them.
Life’s cruelty literally had taken over his most precious gift, his kids. He’s left only with her, but now she didn’t even remember him. Taeyeon could just remind her his name and things happened between them, but she’d forget it soon.
Tayeon put the photos on the table and closed his face with his palms. Tears that he held before fell freely through the gaps between his fingers. He didn’t know that reminiscing good memories can be this painful.
“Did we live a too happy life so we have to face this painful stage ?”
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Sooyoung is a very good and nice woman :D
I feel bad actually for Taeyeon T_T So sad, it's a total bittersweet T__T
And I'm sorry if I can't update as fast as 'Lost'.
Lost was nice but I think it's too simple. I want to put more emotion and since this based on true story, I want to make it feels real.
It is, actually. The background story is real and yeah. It's real :D
Anyway, put your thoughts in the comment box so I know what's on your mind ^__^
Thanks for reading and subscribe :-)
Ciao~
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