Time seemed to be against me as my senior year went by faster than I had wanted. I remember the first week at my new school and the new friends I made almost instantly, the time we spent together and even when my baby brother was born. Baro had been grounded for the whole next week for skipping school and throughout that week Gongchan would appear at my house every day to see my little brother and to play with him. Gongchan really did become my best friend throughout that week and soon enough we were always hanging out together when he wasn’t with the band.

What day was it? Another day at school of course and it was a week left until finals for winter break. I walked into my first period class and shot Gongchan a smile before walking over to his desk and sitting beside him in my own.

“Good morning May.” He greeted with his usual smile. Once we had gotten to know each other he really opened up and was a lot more cheerful with me; he didn’t like me as more than a friend and I didn’t like him as more than a friend, we just had a mutual best friend relationship.

“Good morning Gongchan.” I greeted him back and took out my notebook to get ready for some hardcore review before the final in the class. People around us were making plans for the winter and where they were going to go and who was going with them. My family had no plans for the winter and I mostly thought of the break as a time to catch up on my sleep and my video games.

Once the class started the teacher seemed to go easy on the class and allowed time to work on our review sheets in groups of however many people we want. This signaled for Sandeul, Baro, and Jinyoung to scoot their desks over to Gongchan’s and my desk and we decided to work together as a team.

“Hey May what are you doing for winter break?” Sandeul asked when we were all comfortable with our seating arrangement. So much for studying for the final.

“I was planning on spending my time sleeping and staying up late and catching up on my video games.” I responded with a cheeky grin, to other people those plans would sound boring but to me I was looking forward to just not going to school.

“How about no, instead you should join us on our vacation.” Sandeul exclaimed in a little over a whisper as to not seem like we were not studying, when we obviously weren’t.

“You can’t just invite me like that? I’d have to get permission and everything from all the families involved, right?” I replied not trying to sound mean but I really don’t see my parents agreeing for me to go on a vacation with five boys.

“Well—“ Jinyoung interrupted and looked my way, “my parents are allowing me to bring as many friends as I’d like and it won’t be for too long just a week going to L.A. to see the sights and go to Disneyland.” He explained while tapping his pencil against his desk and waited for my response.

THEY WANT ME TO GO TO L.A WITH THEM AND EVEN GO TO DISNEYLAND?! “R-Really?” I stuttered and gulped really hard. “Your parents wouldn’t mind me tagging along?”

“Oh come on May you’re our number one fan of course they wouldn’t mind.” Baro butted his way in and grinned. “We’ve all been friends for years now so they won’t mind us and since we’re all friends with you they didn’t see why not.”

“I’d have to get permission from my parents though.” I sighed and hit my head slightly on the desk. If I really wanted to go I’d have to do a lot of convincing for them to even consider me going to a whole different town for a week with five boys.

“I’ll go with you.” Sandeul added with a huge smile and my eyes grew about twice as big.

“Uh—I don’t think you’ll need to.”

“Oh come on! I’ve never even been to your house while all the other members have—even CNU got to go over once with Jinyoung while I haven’t even seen your baby brother or even your parents.” Sandeul whined and crossed his arms. He did have a point but he didn’t realize how much trouble it’d be to try to introduce my old imaginary friend to them but as a real person who doesn’t even know about the imaginary friend.

“I just don’t think it’s a good idea.” I muttered trying to find a better excuse than that. Nothing was coming into my head, stupid finals are already stressing me out and now Sandeul wants to go to my house now of all times?!

“I think now is a good time as ever and I can help you convince your parents to come along with us. Besides they wouldn’t be thrilled to know your spending your time with an unknown guy so I’ll introduce myself to them.” He proclaimed and it seemed like nothing in the world was going to stop him from wanting to go to my house.

“Okay fine but first things first you are to only introduce yourself as Jung Hwan Lee and nothing else, don’t tell them your nickname is Sandeul, okay?” I explained and leaned up closer to him to show the seriousness in this conversation. They didn’t know his real name because my Sandeul told me not to tell anyone about it since he always wanted to be referred to as Sandeul. If I can get away with him just saying Jung Hwan I think I might pass this obstacle without too much worry.

“That’s an odd request but if it means I can finally go to your house then I’m all up for it.” Sandeul concluded and our winter plans conversation ended there after Jinyoung decided it was time to actually attempt to study for it. He said if we didn’t get good scores no one was allowed to go which caused all of the boys to grab the book and attempt to study as if their life depended on it.

Once the bell rang I quickly packed up my things and headed out the door as fast as I could only saying a quick goodbye to Gongchan before I was out the door. I would have gotten farther but the second I left the classroom I heard a, “Wait!” and sighed. I thought that maybe if I left the classroom fast enough I could make it to my history class without having to walk with Sandeul. Now don’t get me wrong, he is a friend and I do love hanging out with each member of B1A4 but to be honest I was afraid to get close to Sandeul and showed it in more ways than one. I would instantly talk to any member but him, focus on history instead of talking to him, I’d even go as far as not hanging out with another member if Sandeul were to tag along.

I just had this feeling that if I got close to him my Sandeul wouldn’t be important to me and I had this feeling deep in my mind that if I liked this one he would just leave me too.

He soon caught up with a puff of air and patted me on the shoulder, “Wait for me next time I always have to run to catch up with you even though we have the same next class.” He had on that dorky smile of his and I couldn’t help but smile back at him. It was a lonely smile that didn’t reach my eyes because every time he smiled it was like a blast from the past.

“Sorry.” I muttered and started walking again causing him to catch up once more and walk alongside me in the hallway. I hated how much I cared for him subconsciously, I didn’t want to be close to him I didn’t want him to be a big deal in my life, I didn’t even want him in my life! All I ever think about is my best friend and the memories that came with it.

“You don’t look too happy, are you stressing about finals? Don’t worry you’ll do fine and we’ll definitely go on that trip together. I’d love to go see the beach again even if it’s cold.” Sandeul continued talking and seemed mildly concerned about my wellbeing which didn’t help the fact that I didn’t want to get close to him. I refused it and avoided it like he had a disease.

“Yeah stressing over finals.” I agreed allowing him to think that the reason why I’ve been so down was because of school and not him. I can’t help but like him, I can’t help but smile when he smiles or be sad when he’s sad. I can’t help but love him—but because I love him is the reason why I don’t want to be around him.

It was just my luck when we reached History and our teacher just handed us a review sheet and allowed us the class period to work on it. Sandeul took this time to obviously not do his review sheet and talk to me which caused me not to have enough concentration for the sheet and was forced to talk to him.

He was way too cute for his own good. “So I’ll walk with you to your house today so I can meet your parents and baby brother.” Sandeul started up the conversation the second we were allowed to work with a partner.

Why did I have to agree to him coming over? “Uh—yeah but I really don’t think you can convince them to have me go on this trip really.” My parents are normally hard to convince and I couldn’t see Sandeul making it any easier to go on a trip with him and his band mates. This was all just a bad idea and I was still agreeing to it.

“Oh no worries I’ll just use my charm and they’ll definitely let you go with us.” Sandeul winked and I blushed at the sudden gesture. He laughed at my reaction and looked at his review sheet finally and picking up his pencil; was he actually going to study for once?

That was until I noticed him moving the items away and placing his arms on his desk and resting his head on them soon after that he was asleep on the desk and I sighed. Typical.

I stared at his sleeping face for a good five minutes before realizing what I was doing and blushing an even deeper shade of red. Stop thinking about Sandeul, May! I quickly picked up my pencil and focused on the sheet in front of me and soon enough the sleeping boy was out of my mind and I was working until the bell rang which woke him up only enough for him to pack his things and wave a goodbye and reminding me to wait for him at the front of the school when school ended.

And just like that school ended without too much else. Alice and I ended up talking the whole math period and she even confessed to me that she really liked Baro, his real name being Sun Woo, she told me not to say anything though so I only smiled at her little crush on the boy. I did not have the heart to tell her that he actually kissed me and woke up next to me in bed the next morning. Why did he sleep next to me? He never did respond whenever I asked him but he would always get really red and dismiss it saying he’d never do it again. Strange boy.

I waited around the front of the school for a good five minutes before Sandeul finally showed up and said he was late because he was following Jinyoung and ended up getting lost with the boy inside the school. How could he get lost so easily? Jinyoung was still as amazing as ever and my crush on him seemed to go off and on through the few months I’ve been here. Baro and I had an awkward relationship for a little but despite his random blushing we got along quite well and I still didn’t have a good chance to get to know CNU better. Gongchan as everyone knows is my best friend and Sandeul—he’s just Sandeul.

“Hurry up or else I won’t get as much time to see the baby!” Sandeul shouted when I realized he had already started walking towards my house without me beside him. I ran to catch up with him and he handed me one of his earplugs and motioned to listen to some music as we walked to my house. He showed me all his favorite songs and told me about all the things he was going to do once be became famous. “I won’t forget you though.” He winked and I blushed looking away and trying to focus on the song. He said the group was called Super Junior, the song was No Other and while I might not know exactly what it was about it had a nice tone to it and I knew it had to have been something cute.

Once we reached my house and I inhaled deeply and walked to the front door, opened it and called out that I was home and I had brought a friend with me. My mom instantly came out of the kitchen, holding Ashton in her arms and stared at my ‘new’ friend. “Oh, I’ve never seen him before.” I bet if you remembered how I described Sandeul you’d know in a heartbeat who you were staring at.

“My name is Jung Hwan Lee; I’m one of May’s friends at school. You’ve met my other friends, Gongchan, Baro, Jinyoung and CNU.” Sandeul introduced and bowed politely to my mom. She smiled back at him and walked over to stand closer to us.

“Oh my May why have you not introduced me to him before? He is absolutely adorable and really polite too.” My mom complimented him aloud making sure he could hear and I blushed. Oh how she would freak if she knew his nickname.

“I’ve just—uh never gotten around to it?” I stuttered unsure of what to say or how to respond. My only reason for not allowing him over is the thought of them seeing him but I guess I freaked out for nothing, as long as he’s Jung Hwan no one will realize who he really resembles.

“I think she was too embarrassed to show me her amazing family.” He flashed a smile and played it cool. My mom chuckled at his kindness and dismissed herself to go back into the kitchen but allowing me to hold baby Ashton for Sandeul to see.

“This is Ashton. Ashton this is Sandeul.” I introduced my brother to Sandeul faintly saying his nickname as I lightly grabbed Ashton’s hand and pulled it towards Sandeul’s. Sandeul grabbed it lightly and shook it.

“It is a pleasure to meet you Ash.” He chuckled and motioned for us to sit on the couch together. It didn’t seem awkward sitting so closely to Sandeul on my couch as he played slightly with my baby brother. It felt natural and calming and I couldn’t help but giggle when he continued to make faces at Ashton in hopes of him smiling and laughing. When Ashton finally laughed Sandeul jumped up and did a victory dance before smiling and motioning for me to dance along with him. Things just felt so normal with him and I couldn’t help but wish for this moment to never end.

“Now it’s time for me to convince your mom!” Sandeul whispered loudly and walked over to the kitchen; I followed with a sigh and waited for my happy moment to end.

“Oh hello Jung Hwan, what brings you in the kitchen? Are you going to stay for dinner?” She asked politely turning around with a wooden spoon still in her hands.

“Actually Mrs.—May’s mom I would like to ask a favor of yours concerning your daughter.” Sandeul leaned forward trying to be as calm and polite as he could.

“Go on.” He had her full attention and I couldn’t help but back up slowly holding Ashton closer to me as I waited for the explanation.

“Jinyoung and the rest of my friends were going to go on vacation during winter break and Jinyoung was allowed to bring as many guests as he liked. Well the rest of us really wanted to see if May could join us and don’t worry parents will be there and nothing bad will happen and we promise that she won’t even have to pay a single dime for this trip.” Sandeul explained trying to remain calm, but I could see the sweat forming on his forehead. He was nervous, really nervous.

“Well—“

“Please Mrs.—er May’s mom we promise nothing will go wrong and Jinyoung’s parents are really strict so no one will get hurt and everything.” He broke out and almost begged while bowing at a 90 degree angle.

My mom looked at me and sighed. “I’m fine with it as long as her father is fine with it.”

“YES!” Sandeul shouted in excitement and even so dared as hug my mom before jumping up and down. “You won’t regret it, she’ll have a ton of fun and I’ll definitely get the okay from her father!”

“What about me?” I turned and noticed my father in the doorway a little a ways from where I was currently standing.

“Honey May’s friends want to take her on a vacation during the winter break and I don’t see why not since they’ll be paying for her and there will be parents involved.” My mom explained to my father, he seemed really disapproving but after looking at my cute little face, my mom’s reassuring face, and Sandeul’s excited face he couldn’t help but sigh and agree.

And that was that apparently I’ll be flying out of here the day winter break starts and going straight to L.A. with B1A4! My winter break suddenly got a lot more interesting.