I want to say one BIG shoutout to a new subscriber and someone who reviewed my story! MikaSykes! I got a 74/100 and I know I need to do better if I ever want to get anything in the 90's! The review shop is http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/270013/cherries-and-sugar-review-and-graphic-shop-open-accepting-request-review-reviewshop if you would like to check it out! ^_^ They're really nice so drop by if you have a story you want reviewed~ Thank you once more for your nice review and I hope you enjoy reading my chapters as they come out...even if I do take forever updating since I'm a silly college girl. Oh and don't worry from after this chapter I promise each update will be happier and happier! :3

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I spent hours on those notes believe it or not; I spent all that time sitting at my desk with a pencil tightly in my fingers staring at each blank page waiting for what I wanted to say to come out. Was I being a bit too sentimental? Most likely, but what would you do if your only true friends were leaving at the end of the semester to never see them again? What about Alice? I really don’t know her that well to be honest, I wish I did but every time I try to get close to her I feel like I’m going even farther away. I remember when I went to her house and pretty much crashed her dreams of being with Baro, and I was surprised to her see smiling at me the next time I saw her in math class still wishing to be my friend. Growing up without girl friends must’ve been why I’m so mean to her, but I can’t help it.

I glanced over at Gongchan during class and saw him reading his note and I already knew the others were reading them as well even if I didn’t dare look behind me to see. Gongchan who normally would be the one to smile was staring seriously at the note with a softened expression that only I could see. He didn’t dare look at me since I had told him not to read it yet, but I knew he was going to anyways knowing his personality and all.

Dear Gongchan,

                You are my best friend hands down. No one could ever take your position from you because I know that for the rest of my life I’ll never find someone as fun and challenging as you are. Remember when you stole my history book? My math book? I’m sure you’ve stolen all of my books at some point but that really helped me get to talk to you and get to know you believe it or not. I don’t know why you chose me as your best friend when you already have four wonderful ones that I’m happy to call my friends, but I am still glad you chose me. I might not see you after this semester, but I’ll always remember you and hey I’ll keep up with your music so you better not forget about your number one fan here. You truly are amazing and I know B1A4 will do wonderful, so as you say in Korea FIGHTING!

--May Meadows

What? You’re surprised I signed it my full name and not just my first name? Yeah my full name is May Felicia Meadows, but really I do not like my full name at all and prefer it for people to just refer to me as May and nothing else. Maybe it’s because I don’t have a strong relation with my family or maybe I think Meadows is a cheesy name for the first name of May.

First period ended just like that and the second the bell rang four boys crowded me at my seat with hugs and even kisses on the cheek along with, “Awwww!” and “Thank you!” for the note and chocolate to go along with it.

“May I’ll make sure to give CNU his share when I see him in my fourth period class.” Jinyoung nodded to me with a sincere smile and for once my heart didn’t skip a beat, I think finally my heart has moved on from him after finally writing that note.

Dear Jinyoung,

                You mean so much to me and I bet you are going to be a wonderful leader of B1A4 when you five debut in South Korea. Count me as your number one fan, ‘kay? I do have one thing to say to you and don’t take it too much to heart since feelings change but from the beginning you were the one I looked up to the most and I didn’t want to ruin any friendships but you were the one I liked the most. Your smile was something I wanted to see over and over again, your eyes when you smiled looked so perfect I’d almost catch myself staring. What I’m trying to say is that when I first met you I had the hugest crush on you and it became so much that I’d try to hide it from you, but really I guess I’ve finally accepted something and that high school crushes are usually not the boys you spend the rest of your life with and I’d rather keep you as a great friend then ruin it with relationship problems. I feel like you’re leaving now and not at the end of the semester but I just wanted you to know now.

--May Meadows

“Great, thanks.” I smiled at him and turned my attention to the other boys. It had seemed that Gongchan had already left to go to class and Jinyoung nodded to me and left as well leaving me with only Baro and Sandeul left. I knew I had class with Sandeul next so him being around made sense, but Baro still next to me made me wonder why he hasn’t left for class yet.

Dear Baro,

                You were my first kiss, I know I said I’ve kissed someone before but I was just lying to make myself look cool in front of my new friends. You mean so much to me but I know its not the same way you want me to feel about you. I love you as a friend and I’m sorry if you did like me as something more because it won’t work you’re leaving for Korea and I’m staying here for college. Don’t think that college and leaving is an excuse because it really is not, I just don’t feel the same way for you as you might for me. Believe me though that my first kiss I was happy to have it with you, but you know one thing about that night still throws me off…why were you in my bed that night? I guess the past is the past but it really was a surprise to see you there.

--May Meadows

I looked at Baro and then turned my attention to Sandeul. “Can we talk after school?” Baro suddenly asked and I knew he was referring to the note. I nodded silently not wanting to trust my voice and grabbing Sandeul to get to our next class without being late—though I was not sure how I could handle a period with Sandeul after writing the note I did for him.

Dear Sandeul,

                There has always been something about you that has attracted me to you. Your features? Personality? Smile? From the first day I felt like I’ve known you for years but yet it was our first time meeting each other. Were we friends in a past life? Or maybe you have such a friendly face I couldn’t help but want to be your friend from day one. I know I’ve been avoiding you lately and that I’ve been trying to never get you alone for fear of what might happen since our time on the beach. I fainted and dreamt of something—something that felt more like a memory than a dream. For some reason I felt like you were a part of it but it wouldn’t make sense if you were since it was a small boy in the dream not you. A boy with black hair and thick glasses, but you look nothing like that. What I’m trying to say is I’m not going to avoid you anymore because our time is short together and I want to make the best of it while we’re all still friends here in this school.

--May Meadows

He didn’t sleep like he normally did during History class, he seemed distant and lost in thought with his head resting in the palm of his hand and his eyes looking directly towards the board but with eyes that showed he was not even paying attention to the lesson—it makes me wonder how he was passing this class if he never paid attention in it, but why should he care if this history doesn’t concern him.

During the remainder of the day I wondered how everyone was doing since they all seemed so different after that and barely spoke to each other. CNU was probably reading his letter by now since it hit fourth period and I started at my Science teacher without paying attention to a single word he was teaching in the lecture—I’m sure I’ll be fine without the knowledge of one lecture.

Dear CNU,

                We’re barely friends and when we do talk it’s usually awkward and forced. I feel bad for not getting close to you like I had done with the other members and I want to make it a point to show more friendship for you since we don’t have long until I won’t see you again except online when I follow your band. I want to spend from now until the end of the semester with all five of you to get to know all of you better and to have as much fun as possible. Just you wait by the end of this school year we’ll all be the best of friends.

--May Meadows

The rest of the school day seemed to pass by fast seeing that I only had two more classes until the end, but I knew I had to talk to Baro after school which caused me to stare at the clock in my Math class angrily silently wishing for the time to just stop. Alice was happy to receive chocolate from me and even received a chocolate from someone else that day and told me all about it during the beginning of the class before the lecture started. She seemed all blushy and happy to be getting something so it made me wonder just how much she liked Baro if she was going to be all cute around other guys, but then again Baro was only a crush—and I did crush her dreams about going out with him a while ago.

Riiiiing!

Damn it! Well there’s no escaping it now, I knew I had to talk to Baro but at the same time I didn’t want to end anything between us—I just wanted us to be friends. “Why do you look so down?” Alice asked breaking me from my depressing chain of thought.

“Oh, nothing just thinking about something I have to go do now.” I smiled nervously and stood up from my desk, gathered all of my things and left the classroom. I was happy to have a friend like Alice even if we barely talked and I know absolutely nothing about her. Maybe I need to spend some time with her as well, but I don’t want to lose any time with B1A4 either.

“Hey May.” A familiar voice rung through my ears and I knew he found me the second I walked out of the front doors of the school. Students were leaving left and right, friends were smiling and couples were holding hands with thoughts of going out on a date tonight, but I was different. I had to face the one thing I did not want to face, having to reject Baro’s feelings for me. Even from the beginning they were quite obvious though I don’t see why he liked me so much, I always thought Asians went for Asians not American girls.

“Hey Baro.” I greeted back looking at his usual illegal style of uniform as well as his hat that he wears every day after school ends. He motioned for me to follow him to a clearer place with less students and sat on the brick wall that outlined the front of the school. I sat beside him and tried to keep my eye contact on everything but him; he noticed and only scooted closer to me to cause me to glance his way.

“That letter…” He trailed off unsure of what to say as a response to what I had wrote him. The awkward feel of the atmosphere seemed to increase with each second that passed. “It was obvious, wasn’t it?”

I was silent for a moment to think about what to say but finally I ended up just saying, “Yeah.”

“Were you really happy that I was your first kiss?” He asked suddenly causing me to look at him to see if he was really asking this; the blush on his cheeks proved that he was really asking it and not teasing me.

“True love’s first kiss is a myth and just because you kiss someone doesn’t automatically make them fall in love with that person. I was happy it was with you and not some creepy person who didn’t care about me. We’re friends, good friends I hope, and I don’t want to lose that. Everyone…all of B1A4 means the world to me, but I know not all endings are happy.” I looked at the ground and shuffled my feet as I talked, as I explained to him how I’ve been feeling for a while now. I don’t want to lose anyone and I don’t want to end things on a bad memory—they mean too much to even think about ending anything badly with them.

“South Korea is pretty far…the language barrier, the culture and style everything is different. It has been a dream of ours since we formed this band to debut there and be the best we could be, and nothing is going to stop us. You’re always mentioned when we practice without you, you’re always brought up when we eat together and even if it’s just two of us, or when we’re all by ourselves you always seem to enter our minds. We don’t want to lose you as much as you don’t want to lose us.” Baro sniffled slightly as he spoke and I could tell he wanted to cry but held it in. “Why can’t you just come with us? Why can’t you just drop everything here and be with us? I don’t want to leave you! I love you!” He shouted and by the way his voice cracked several times I knew he was crying. I knew he didn’t want me to leave as much as Gongchan, as much as Sandeul, anyone from B1A4.

The thought of dropping my family, my life here to just go to another country seemed almost ridiculous, just to go for five boys? “I-I know.” I stuttered and brought my head down. I didn’t even notice him bringing his arms around me into a tight hug.

“Why can’t you accept my feelings?” He asked; I could feel the tears on my shoulder. I knew other people were watching; I knew he was being serious if he could cry so easily in front of all the students still hanging around school.

“B-Because I love someone else.” I whispered through my cracked voice, I knew I was going to cry, I knew I couldn’t hold back my tears when I knew Baro was crying his heart out for me.

“Is it Sandeul?” He asked and I froze up in his touch. I did love Sandeul, the real one and the imaginary one. I don’t want to hide my feelings from him but I know it’ll never work out. “So it is…” He released me and wiped his tears away. He attempted to smile but it just looked like the saddest smile in the world to me.

“I just…” I couldn’t even explain myself to him, I couldn’t tell him the connections I had to Sandeul; they wouldn’t make sense to anyone.

“I understand.” He stood up and turned his back on me. “Because,” He turned around to face me once more, “I know he loves you as well.” He flashed that same sad smile and turned away this time to walk away. He didn’t speak anymore and he didn’t turn around once he finished. He waved goodbye in a nonchalant way and acted like he wasn’t the one crying his eyes out to me only minutes beforehand.

But that last sentence hit me hard. Sandeul loves me too? How would Baro know that? Was he really giving up just like that? “That boy…” I whispered and shook my head. He understood one thing that’s for sure—to never mess with love even if he loves me too.

Friendship, loyalty, and trust. These five boys had all of those and they stick to those morals and codes more than anyone I’ll ever meet. That is the true bond of B1A4.