okay...this is for real now :) sorry about that trolling thingy :D

(again better if you'll reread the flashback chapters to avoid confusions :D two tabs is better than one :P )

 

Flashback (chapter 32)

YURI’S POV

After Yoong and I broke up the girls acted unusual towards me...

I can’t blame them... Yoong is hurting because of me... when that incident happened, I feel like I no longer belong or I have no right to be in our dorm and worst...i feel like I have no right to be with them.

--

Last night I didn’t stay in our dorm, I spend my night over  our  house...

My mom was a bit surprised with my sudden presence, but at the same time she’s very glad to see me... and she gave me what I needed the most, her hug...

“what’s wrong?” she asked cupping my face... my tears started to fall... words aren’t needed for her to know what I’m feeling...

“it’s over...” I said...and she hugged me again...tighter...

I told everything to her and she was mad about the president’s decision, she said that she would like to talk to the president and stop his non sense, for her side, this thing he wanted is too much...saying that we’re still the one who should control our lives and not them...but I begged her not to, I know my mom is right but I just can’t let that happen...i know He’s doing this thing for our own good...

“maybe...just maybe...we really aren’t meant together... maybe Yoong can find someone better than me...” I said trying to hold my tears...

“if you really love her, you’ll fight for her...no matter how hard the situation is...Yuri-ah...Things happens...if you two were meant to be together...nothing gets in the way...” she said while holding my hands...

YURI’S MOM POV

“I do love her...so much...that im willing to let her go for her own happiness...” my daughter said...

“sweety...Yoona won’t find someone better....because you are the best...” I told her and she just gave me a weak nod.

“mom...why...does..it hurt...so much?” she asked between her sobs... I couldn’t help but to cry...i could feel how hurt she is and  seeing my daughter in pain like this is such a torture...

“because it is real Yuri-ah...” I said wiping her tears and hugged her

How I wish I could ease her pain with a hug, to a mother seeing her child in pain, it’s like an endless pain for us unless we see them smiling again, thus, I am proud of my daughter...she’s a grown up now...she makes decision not thinking about herself alone but for the good of many, love taught her to be selfless and to be beautiful,inside and out...and......Yoona taught her what love is...

I know Yuri’s heart will smile again...and when that time comes...i’ll smile along with her...and I know...Yoona will still be the reason...

 

YURI’S POV

"mom...why...does... it hurt...so much?"

“because it is real Yuri-ah”

Those are the exact words she told me when I confessed to her my relationship with Yoong,

My mom and I were on the dining table having some desserts...

“mom, I have something to say...but please don’t be mad at me...” I started...this is now or never, im gonna confessed to my mom...this is worst than confessing your love to someone -.-

“what is it sweety? You already got a boyfriend?” she asked making my eyes widened

“no...” I said shaking my head...

“a girlfriend then?” she said making me chocked.BIG TIME!

“I’ll take that as a yes...” she said giggling...

“mom...this is serious...” I said

“I know...and I am serious...so? are you going to tell me who’s the lucky GIRL or you want me to tell it by myself?” she said... ‘what the?how the hell?!’

“you knew?!?!”

“pabo-ya, I’m your mother you idiot! Of course I’ll know...thinking of it as I first notice you and Yoona, it’s pretty hard for me to accept it...but at the end what matters is you.” she said...i wanted to jumped out of my seat because of my happiness but instead, I just hugged my mom and thanked her...

“mom...i don’t know how or why but she makes me happy...” I said

“because it is real Yuri-ah...” she said... tears started to fall within me...my happiness right now is just undescribable.

“Yoonyul is real eh?” she teased

“it is more than real..” I said...

 

--Flashback(chapter 32)
 

Early in the morning, I went back to the dorm and just find out that Yoong is sick... I can’t help but to blame myself... this is all my fault...

As I prepared a water and a towel for Yoong and earn a scoffed from Sooyoung...

“so you still care after all?” she asked me...I understand her behavior towards me, I can’t blame her...i know she cares for Yoong a lot so I just ignore her...

“Sica...” I called

“ne?”

“can you do this for me?” I asked her handling the water and towel

“of course” she said and I thanked her... when I was about to leave, Sica called ,me and said..,

“I’m just here” those words were just priceless...she might be called to be an ice princess but of all ice,she’s the warmest... I forced a smile and leave...tears started to fall as I walk away, knowing that someone is still there when the world is against you...it’s a good feeling...

--

I’m in the kitchen preparing something to eat for my breakfast when the doorbell suddenly rang... when the maknae opened the door, I was surprised...it’s GeunSuk...i could feel my heart scrunched as He asked for Yoong...my yoong...

Maknae guide her to where Yoong is...in our room... and then I saw the others went out of the room leaving him and Yoong alone... I tried to focus myself from cutting fruits since the girls were looking at me...

Minutes later...Geunsuk came out of the room...with Yoong...

I looked at them once... one look yet multiple stabs in my heart... i focused myself again from cutting fruits... i’ve been cutting my fruits like forever...i didn’t notice that I was just there..standing,staring, mind flying... heart hurting...

 

“hey guys...i just wanna ask your permission... I would like to date your sister Yoona, and it will be great if I’ll have your blessing…so I hope you’ll all agree” the moment He said that...i wanted to leave...i don’t want to hear anything...

.

.

.

“I already said yes...” ‘yoong....’

I almost fell on my knees as soon as i heard those words...i wanna break down and let my emotions flow...but I can’t...

 

“Taeyeon-shi?” he asked...

“uhh…if that’s Yoona wants and...if that’s what will make her.....happy” taeyeon said... He also asked the others and they all agreed with taeyeon...

“where’s Yuri-shi?”

“Yuri-shi can I bother you for a sec?” He asked...you have no idea how much you’re bothering me right now...

“I guess you heard it right? So is it a yes or a no?” He asked... ‘It’s a No, but I have to say yes’

“U-unnie...you’re bleeding...” maknae suddenly said who’s looking at me... I  assured them tha it’s just a small cut...to be honest, I didin’t know that I cut myself...i can’t even feel the pain... I’d rather feel the sting of this cut than this pain in my heart...

“if that’s what she wants, if that’s will make her happy...if you’ll make her happy...if you won’t make her cry...if you won’t hurt her... ...if you will never broke her heart...if--”  I keep saying things...i don’t even know where it came from...then someone cuts me...

 “enough!” ‘yoong...’ she took my hand and covered my finger with her clothes...i wanted to cry that time...but I just can’t let myself ruin this...i’ve sacrificed too much...

I feel so weak,worthless and helpless after realizing what I’ve just said...the moment I said those things, I know that's the moment  I'm letting her go...it is the moment that I let GeunSuk to take Yoong away from me...

“small cut?! This is a deep one!” sooyoung exclaimed, the girls immediately took a kit. ‘they still cared after all...’

Guilt in me were intense... I’ve hurt her too much and still...here she is...curing my wound... while I...i can’t help her...instead Im hurting her more...

 

--Flashback (chapter 33)

 

Few hours later, Ailee came...  

This is it...the main event...the revelation of a lie...

She greeted the other girls and she hugged me tightly the moment she saw me... I could see among the members the shock on their faces... I know the moment they saw Ailee hugged me...they already knew...

“omo! what happened to your hand?!”

“it’s nothing...it’s just a small cut...”

“are you sure? You should’ve told me but....,you can’t since you left this last night” she handed over my phone... it’s all planned...early this morning before I head to our dorm, I gave my phone to Ailee and planned that she’ll visit the dorm give it back to me so it would look like that we’ve slept together...

Before Ailee could leave, she gave me a peck on the lips...it wasn’t really in the lips...we decided to fake the kiss by making it a quick one so they would believe that it was on the lips...

I was taken back with the sound of a fallen glass... it was Yoong...all along she’s been watching...i don’t like it for her to witness it all......but she has to...

The girls run towards her, including me... but Hyo stopped me...

“Yuri-ah…someone’s waiting down there…” it was Ailee...

While we’re nearing close to the door Ailee stopped and faced me...

“Yuri-ah...just tell her the truth...” she said then she hugged me and leave

‘I wish I could...but I just couldn’t....’

 

I went back upstairs to check on Yoona after walking Ailee outside the dorm...

Once again, I encountered the fuming Sooyoung, good thing her girlfriend was there to calm her...but in that moment I don’t care how angry she is , all I care about is Yoong...

The girls went out of the room as soon as they saw me  standing near the door looking out for Yoong,

“Yoong...” I called softly as I walk near to her...

“go away...please...” she said between her sobs...

“yoong, I didn’t mean to cause you all this, I didn’t mean to hurt you...im sorry...” only if I could punch myself at that moment I would...

“you don’t mean to hurt me?! Do you even know that word?! ‘hurt’ and do you even know how hurt I am right now? I feel so stupid... I thought if I’ll go out with Geun Suk oppa you’ll get jealous, I thought you’ll feel the same thing im feeling but I guess im thinking way too much...i feel so stupid thinking that we still have a chance...”

I decided not to say anything since I might just say the truth seeing her like that, instead, I approached her into a hug...a hug which she responded to...

I closed my eyes and cried along with her...

‘only if you knew how much im hurting right now...how much I wanted to wipe your tears and tell you that everything will be okay...how much I wanted to say I love you...how much I wanted to touch your lips with mine.......how much I wanted to stop this...to stop hurting you...’

“yu-yul... wh-what did I do wrong??” ‘nothing...’

 “I love you so much Yul...I love you...wh-why do I have to be hurt like this when all I did is to love you...i’ve been trying to forget you but how am I going to if everything reminds me you?

Yul...i wanted to wake up from this nightmare”  ‘I wanted to wake up from this nightmare too... but im afraid that you might regret it... maybe...just maybe...this nightmare of yours will eventually become a dream...’

“mianhae...”  I said and leave the room... I couldn’t hold my tears any more...

‘Why do we have to suffer like this when all we did is to love?....’

--

The next day... I found out that Yoong and Geunsuk is out for a date...to whom? Sooyoung told me...

“she’s out for a date with oppa...” she said

“Yuri-ah...you might have started your career as an actress but you can’t act everything out...”

“and Yuri-ah...yes I’m mad about all this...but...it doesn’t mean I hate you...and... I’m still here...All of us are still here...” she said and leaves... I just smiled...somehow I felt that im not alone...

--

After hearing that Yoong  will be out for a date, I asked Ailee to accompany me to check her out... for Ailee it sounds really stupid to spy on them since for her I’ll just hurt myself more... even I thinks that it’s really a stupid idea but I have my reason why im doing this...

 

Ailee and I were outside the restaurant on a disguise looking to a couple who seems having fun...

Then I felt a tap on my shoulder, I bet that one is for a comfort...

The truth is, im not here to spy and hurt myself... im here to see her...smiling... and the moment I saw that smile on her face...somehow my lips curved into a smile too...

 

AILEE’S POV

While Yuri is staring at the couple...or just to Yoona, I’m looking at her...then I saw her smile confusing me a bit, but one thing is for sure...she’s crying inside...

“Now, are you regretting this?” I suddenly asked while looking at her...

“look at her, that smile…I’ve been longing to see that since the day I broke her heart…and if I’ll see that smile on her face everyday  then i guess I don’t have to regret it… all I wanted is her to be happy…

even though... im not the reason behind it…

But I wanted to be the one…again…”

She said still looking at Yoona...Her tears started to fall…I feel bad for asking such a stupid question... I couldn’t help but to pity her…

We might have known each other for just a short time but I know she was indeed hurt.

“Yuri-ah” I hugged her tightly…I can definitely feel her pain...

 

 “why the hell am I crying? I should be happy right? The mission was a success……

 

But why??

 

Why does it hurt so much….

 

...it hurts so much...so much...” she said tears uncontrollably falling down to her face...

“Yuri just tell her… I know she still loves you… no one can make her happy like you do, no one can make her complete like you do and no one can heal her but you…” I said

“…………………”

“I’ve hurt her enough...”

“let’s go now...” she said  and we leave...

 

I never knew that loving someone could go this far...to the point that you’re willing to suffer just for the sake of your loved one...

I was right after all... the first time I saw their video... I knew it's not just a fanservice...it was real... Yoonyul is real...

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

I am a Trooper! Kyaaa ~~ (A/N sorry to ruin the moment,HAHAHAHA)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TBC

oh please....forgive me...