“You know if you wear it too much, it’ll get dingy..”

Luhan still refused to shed the hat, pulling the colorful accessory even further onto his head.  It isn’t that I don’t want him to wear it; I couldn’t be happier that he loves it as much as he does.  But I worry that he might even be showering with it.  

“I do take it off, if that’s what you’re implying!”

Luhan’s voice reverberated through the aisle, the bookshelves absorbing most of the volume.

“Quiet down!” I say, pressing my finger to his lips, “this is a library, not your house!”

I can feel Luhan’s lips pull down slightly, signaling the cute pout he always makes when he’s upset.  I chuckle lightly, adjusting myself against the bookshelf while pushing aside a pile of books that had gathered on my side.  Chairs had never really been my thing when it came to libraries: the floor always means maximum space.  My finger leaves Luhan’s lips that soon find their way to mine.  

“How can you even understand those?”

Luhan takes the book from my hand, squinting his eyes as he tries to decipher the writing on the cover.

“Ca-cacha in da lie?”

I laugh, taking the book back from his small hands.

“Catcher in the Rye.”

Luhan’s eyes widen- well, as much as they can- as he looks at me in pure surprise.

“Wow, your english is amazing,” he says, eyes changing from surprise to curiosity.  “How did your english get so good?”

“I’m actually not sure.  Ever since I could read, I’ve just been drawn to English.  Everything about it- from the sentence structure, to the grammar, to just the sound of it- it all just kinda clicked.  When I got the hang of it, I discovered literature, English literature.  Bronte, Dickinson, Shakespeare, Salinger: I’ve read them all.  Reading has always been an escape; a way to take a step away from reality and jump into an adventure.  An adventure filled with pirates, mermaids, trust, loyalty, heartbreak, and death.  The way a writer can just ensnare you, control your emotions and your thoughts.”

I take a deep breath and look over at Luhan, who hasn’t torn his eyes from me since I began talking, before I continue.

“I think about all the times I’ve cried over people who don’t exist.  The times I’ve angrily thrown a book across the room only to pick up where I left off.  All this through only the power of words,” I bring my knees to my chest, voice trailing off into nothingness.  “I’ve always wanted to do that.”

___________________________________________________


“THERE’S NO WAY YOU’RE GETTING AWAY WITH THAT!”

My legs carry me swiftly from one side to the other, dodging Luhan’s futile attempts to hit me.  If the giant pillow in his hand compared to mine isn’t handicap enough, I’m practically backed into a corner.  The only ways of escape is around, heavily guarded by the smaller pillow he wields in his left hand.  

“FINE! I SURRENDER OKAY?”

Luhan grins in victory before advancing toward me.

“Nuh-uh, I still haven’t gotten my revenge~”

I take this chance to run to his left before he regains hold on his giant pillow.  I dive straight to the bed, intent on taking cover on the opposite side.  Instead, Luhan uses his body to pin me down, letting go of his pillows to grip my arms on either side of my head.  He straddles my stomach, face inches from mine.  His breathing is shallow, each breath hitting my face and intoxicating me with his honey sweet scent.  My eyes land on his pink lips just barely ghosting over mine.  My tongue darts across his bottom lip before he presses his lips against mine.  His hands release my arms to cup my face, bringing our faces even closer together.  

Perfect

I pull away from him, hand still gripping my pillow, and let out an evil laugh before smacking him square on his .
“I guess that means I win.”


My nose crinkles, eyes fighting to stay shut despite the fact that I can’t fall asleep. The ringing in my ears echoes in my head, pounding and hammering against my brain.  Her voice pierces through the silence of the night, stinging me like bees.

Ugly

Useless

Stupid

I soon find myself downstairs, the light in the kitchen just enough to keep me from tripping as I splash cool water on my face.  The ringing just keeps getting louder and louder, soon it’s all I can hear; the sound of the crickets chirping and trees yawning burned out by the pounding in my head.  

Suddenly, the light brightens, my vision clouded by tears I didn’t know I shed.  

Arms embrace me, my nose burying in the fuzziness of a robe and filled with the scent of tonight’s dinner and a hint of perfume.  Her hands rub circles into the small of my back, accompanied by a string of “It’s alright”’s and “I’m here”’s.

“Thank you.”

“How many times do I have to tell you to stop saying that?”

“Just.. thank you.  Thank you for being the mother I never had.”

A/N
okay this is slightly more.. indepth than my other chapters?
iunno I feel like this one has more substance I guess
FIRST UPDATE IN FOREVER SO sorry for its crappiness...
it's gonna start getting a little more angsty from now on... so be prepared!! ^^