Soon Hee’s POV:

I woke up to a quiet dorm. Jongin Oppa slept on the couch again as was best. I knew if I was beside him at night, I probably would have done something I would regret. I already did at that point. I played the kiss in the elevator back in my head. Over and over. It wouldn’t disappear. A part of me didn’t want it to but, it had too. I had Jae Ha. I just cheated on my boyfriend with his cousin nonetheless.

I got out of bed and soon realized I was alone in the apartment. I saw a note taped to the fridge. I went closer and saw Kai’s writing.

“Good morning Soon Hee.

The members and I went to the funeral and most likely will be gone for the whole day since we will go to the burial as well.

If you need anything, text me.

I’ll have my phone on me.

-Jongin”

I read the note again and placed it on the table next to me. I just sat there staring into nothing. I didn’t know what to do or what to feel. Ever since Jongin Oppa came into my life, my entire world got turned upside down. It was too late to change it. It was too late to turn my life back around to what it was. I didn’t want to at the same time. I went over to the bookshelf to look for something to distract myself.

I picked up the first thing I saw titled, “Debut Days”. I thought it must be stories from when the group debuted. I opened it to see photos with notes taped behind them. I saw twelve boys sitting around a dance room eating food and laughing at each other. I saw people piggybacking each other. I saw practices full of sweat and tired faces. I saw a picture of their first debut on stage. I turned the photo around to see a note; “Never give up! Let’s always remember how hard work pays off when we want to accomplish our dreams. The road will be tough, but always worth the sacrifices.”

I reread the note multiple times. Something about it spoke to me. I didn’t know what it was. I put the picture back in the book and proceeded to grab all my stuff. I knew what I had to do. It all made sense in that moment.

I grabbed my bag and searched for the closest bus station which thankfully was only a train ride away. I left the house with a note taped to the fridge going towards the train station. Once in the bus station, I purchased the next ticket home.

Kai’s POV:

The funeral was meant to be quiet but was filled with a lot of press and reporters. Once I saw SHINee and Super Junior hyungs holding onto the coffin, I wanted to burst into tears like the rest of the company. We all lost one of the most talented people in this company. He was one of the faces of the company and we all knew it.

Once the burial was over, a few of us went back to SHINee’s dorm, which wasn’t far from ours, and just stayed there holding onto them. We are men. We are born and raised to not show feeling so it took a while, but Key couldn’t contain his tears along with Minho. Taemin and Onew hyung were silent. I went over to Taemin who fell onto my shoulder in tears. Just a few months ago, it was me falling on his shoulder crying my heart one. How much life changes within a short amount of time scares me.

I checked my phone with no texts from Soon Hee so I assumed she was okay. While holding onto Taemin, I replayed that kiss in my head for a short moment. It made all this bearable. I knew I have done something unforgivable, but it was something I wanted to do for such a long time. She understood everything about me. She was the void in my life that I needed.

After SHINee’s manager told us to leave, the members and I decided it was best to go back home. As soon as I came home, I searched for Soon Hee only to find all her stuff gone. I started to text and call her when Chanyeol hyung called me over to the kitchen.

I came over to see him staring down at a piece of paper by the fridge.

“I think this is for you.” he said as he held out the note to me.

“Jonging Oppa,

I had to go back home. There’s something I need to do.

Don’t worry about me.

I figured out where the bus station is and I’ll be there safe and sound.

Remember to always smile. Even when you’re upset, a smile can bring some form of happiness.

-Soon Hee”

She went back to Jae Ha. I knew it. She was going to choose him after all. He’s my cousin, I knew this, but I love her. I’m in so much pain.