Kai’s POV:

We all said goodbye as quietly as we could. Being in the paparazzi's view was hard after that break of freedom I had. Being with my members made it a bit easier. We saw SHINee and all the other artists from different agencies. We had to put on a brave face as this was our company. We had to be okay.

We went towards our dorm in silence. Everyone was thinking about this incident. We entered the room and the only thing I wanted to do was find Soon Hee and hug her. I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I looked all over the dorm and couldn’t find her. She must’ve went out I thought so I called her cell but she didn’t pick up. I called again, she still didn't pick up. 

I ran into my room and quickly changed into more normal clothes. The members started asking what I was doing but before they knew it, I was running out the door. I looked between all the blocks closest to the dorm. I could not find her. I kept calling but she would not answer no matter how many times I called. I really started to get worried. This was her first time in Seoul by herself. Something could happen if she doesn't have her phone. Seoul isn't a safe place for anyone, especially a girl who's never been. She must have been so scared. I wanted to scream her nam ein hopes she owuld hear me. Soon Hee come back please. come back to me. I pleaded this in my head over and over again. 

I finally ended up in a park and sat down on the ground. I picked up my phone about to call the members but I saw someone sitting looking up at the sky. I looked up too only to see the sky turning purple. I followed the fading colours with my eyes to a girl walking along the river side. I recognized Soon Hee right away and got up running.

I ran towards her back and embraced her harder than I ever have. She jumped up confused but didn't force me off of her. She must have known it was me. 

“How could you disappear and not answer your phone?” I whispered into her shoulder, “Do you have any idea how terrified I was? I can’t lose you Soon Hee. I can’t”

She just stood there and lifted her arms to rest on top of mine.

“I forgot my charger at home so my phone died an hour ago. I’m sorry” she whispered back.

We stayed like that for a few more minutes until I let go. She turned around to face me. I hid my face as I knew how red it was. She placed her hand on my chin to make me face her. She just stared in my eyes and the tearing intensified.

She knew what it is like to lose someone dear. She knew how terrifying it was to get close to people again in fear that you’d lose them too. For someone so young, she knew more about my fears than I did. For someone so young, she still knew how to smile in spite of these fears.

We walked back hand in hand to my dorm. I needed the comfort of another and the only other person I’d want is in more pain than I am after having lost his hyung. I needed her. Once we got closer to the main road, she let go. I looked at her in confusion and then she said, “Paparazzi can be anywhere and you can’t be in a scandal”

I looked at her shocked and wanted to say, “If it’s with you,  I wouldn’t mind” but she was right. SM can only deal with Jonghyun Hyung right now.

Once we got into the building and in the elevator, something happened and the elevator stopped. We both looked at each other in confusion. Soon Hee started to press the alarm button and we waited but no response followed. I pulled out my phone only to realize the elevator doesn’t have service.

The only thing we could do was wait. Soon Hee came towards me and sat down with a sigh. I sat down next to her and began to ask her what happened.

“Jae Ha called me earlier freaking out. He was worried and he wanted me to come home”

“What did you say?”

She looked into my eyes for a good few seconds before replying with, “I told him I wanted to stay here with you. How am I meant to leave you alone? You need me… er you need someone here with you.”

And with that, I couldn’t contain myself anymore. I grabbed her face with my hands and leaned towards her. I pressed my lips into her own and held the kiss. She placed her hands around my neck and brought me closer to her. By this point, I couldn’t help myself. I brought her closer to me and my hands were intertwined with her long hair and her hands were playing with my hair in a large mess. The kiss became deeper and more intimate. I requested access to go in further and she let me without a question. We had to break apart as we couldn’t breathe anymore.

Our foreheads leaned against one another as we gasped for breathes. My hands remained on the back of her neck keeping her close to me. I needed her, I wanted her. I love her. This thought popped into my head but I wasn’t scared. I knew I loved her the moment I saw her in that chicken vest and cap running away from me after seeing me. I knew I loved her when she collapsed before my eyes. I knew I loved her when we stood on the balcony together sharing our deepest secrets. I also knew, she was my cousin’s girlfriend.

She realized this too and backed away with the saddest look I’ve ever seen on her.

“Jae Ha.”