pairing:  2jae

Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters mentioned herein after. This work is purely fictional and is interned for fun.

Message to my giftee: Merry Christmas dear. I hope you enjoy this work and I look forward to reading your thoughts on it. Have a great joyful holiday and Happy New Year as well.

I apologize if it seemed rushed towards the end but I lost my original work and had to rewrite most of it within two days of the deadline

Summary: His father entrusted him with Youngjae`s life, Youngjae entrusted him with his heart. Torn between a sense of loyalty to the man that took him off the streets and a love to a man he protected. This is the story of the Bodyguard.

Guard my Heart

It rang loud and he stirred from his ever troubled sleep slightly. Less than a second passed and instincts that have been honed and trained for years made him sit up abruptly, steel eyes taking a sweep of the room. Nothing was out of sorts, no immediate danger resided with him. It rang again and he closed his eyes rubbing a hand over his tired face before pinching the bridge of his nose, knowing the moment he accepted the call, his peace and quiet for the moment would be broken and he'd have no choice but to obey orders.

He lifted the arm off of his waist, setting the limb non-too gently on the sheets, uncaring if its owner woke up or not. It would be better if they did. The sooner the woman woke up, the sooner she would leave. Throwing back the sheets, he grabbed his pants, drawing them over lean hips, passing the belt through the loops before buckling it. Padding barefoot, he made to his jacket, where it lay on the back of the chair, along with his gun and hostler, where his phone was ringing nonstop. He took his time putting on the shirt not bothering to button it just yet. He fished into his right inner pocket and the phone was in his hand and he wanted to throw out from the balcony, his room on the 52nd floor would ensure its destruction.

It's been almost a year.

Actually, tomorrow would be the first anniversary of his departure. It's been almost a ing year from the last time he had seen him in person, heard his voice. It's been almost a year since the last time his name lightened up his mobile screen, flashing repeatedly, mocking, taunting, and pushing against a wound that bled still. He had left, where he had demanded of Jaebum not to follow. All he had known that he went to his mother and the ex-wife of Mr. Choi changed countries like one would change their underwear. One day the media would spot them in a ball thrown by the former minister of Italy and the next week they would be in Paris for the fashion week and so it went. He had bloomed, blossomed into a remarkable young man. Influential, handsome, and kind-hearted. Money and fame had not tainted Choi Youngjae.

The ringing picked up again, his thumb hovering over the green icon that would enable him to accept the call. He debated not answering, letting it go to his voicemail instead, a decision that would give him a brief satisfaction and a small victory of winning over the hold the other still had over him. He pressed the green icon and swept it to the right and answered. Call him a masochist or answering out of morbid curiosity.

Silence greeted him and the soft breathing reached his ears. Something akin to a heavy weight shifted and his shoulders sagged a bit and he could breathe a little better after a year of incapability to breathe at all.

Endless nights of watching him breathe as he slept near him, in his bed and in his arms had caused him endless sleepless nights after the other left; where he didn't know if he breathed still or not.

He remembered so vividly those times. He had spent them in a daze, hallowed out of any reaction or feeling. All he knew and felt was pain. Gut-twisting pain, squeezing his insides from fresh memories that delighted in tormenting him. He had walked about with a noose around his lungs, tightening with each breath he drew. It was only a week later after Youngjae` sudden leaving that a call came in, informing Mr. Choi of his whereabouts and being over 21, Mr. Choi could do nothing but agree to let Youngjae go much to Jaebum`s dismay. He had wanted the vicious tycoon to drag him back to Seoul kicking and screaming. Even if Youngjae did not want Jaebum anymore, having him near was better than not having him at all.

Three months after the call, time had passed so slowly, uneventful and he had relayed on articles in magazines or on the internet to keep up with on his news. He almost felt like a stalker, collecting crumbs on the object of his affections. He had stopped waiting for his calls to be picked up or for a call to come through, anything to tell why one moment they were in each other`s embrace and the next Jaebum was left behind.

That call never came and Jaebum had been devastated and it took him getting four bullets in a drive by shooting to wake up and realize that Youngjae was not coming home. It took him months to get better and get back to his job, being one of the personal and most trusted bodyguards of Choi Dong Joon; powerful business man and owner of Choi Investments, Choi Gourmets and Choi Couture, brother in law to Song Joong Hoo, business tycoon and real-estate prince with alleged ties to the mafia.

Jaebum still wondered to this day what had happened between them. The final hours before Youngjae left, he had spent asking, demanding and begging for answers the young heir refused to give. What left Jaebum baffled was that Youngjae looked just as crushed as he had been if not more, the decision causing not just Jaebum but him immense misery.

The steady breathing broke and he heard the catch as if the other was standing in front of him, trembling and softly crying and he hated how Youngjae affected him still, even after what he had done to them, that he still had the ability to soften his heart. He supposed as long as he continued to love him, Choi Youngjae would always have power over him.

He heard rustling and looked at the bed, the sheets dropping to reveal the cheap flesh of the girl he picked up at a bar this evening. She was a poor substitute to the real thing, to the thing he wanted. He had chosen her because she was both the opposite and the identical copy of Youngjae. She had the same coloring; dark soft hair and bright doe eyes. Approximate height and weight. Soft round cheeks, highlighted by fake blush instead of the natural coloring Youngjae had around him. Yet it wasn't enough. She didn't have that small scar behind a knee from falling off the motorbike, he knew because he had checked. She didn't kiss where the bullet he took for Youngjae had skinned his neck like Youngjae used to do whenever the younger was in his arms. She didn't fit him like she was made for his body. She was fit, years of taking care of her body whereas Youngjae`s body was untouched, fitting around him in a perfection that Jaebum could only grow addicted to; to which he had. She didn't cradle his head against her neck as he took them to heavenly heights and back. She didn't say his name in that breathy whisper just as Youngjae did.

Youngjae used to have and do all of those things.

"Jaebum…"

Just like that, in that breathless tone of his. Youngjae made his name sound so special, so warm. He uttered it like he was caressing it, the letters rolling around his tongue intimately.

"I am not ready to see you tomorrow!"

Ah yes, the reason why he went out and sought someone to silence the demons roaring inside his head. He figured if he ed a version of him, he'd be able to erase him, erase wanting him so that when he would see Youngjae , he wouldn't kiss him senseless or trap them in one of the many rooms in his father`s mansion.

Said girl walked toward him, not bashful of her ness. She flaunted it, hoping to catch his attention and have him for another round or two, as if the previous three were not enough for her. If he had to be honest the first one was one too many for him. Bile rose in the back of his throat as he took in the marks he left on her body; teeth and hand on her neck, s and thighs where he had non-too gently ed into her. He blamed the drinks and his bruised heart.

"Jaebum!" pause, hitched breaths "Just don't hang up"

She went to her knees, unbuckling and lowering the pants he just put on until the fabric gathered around his ankles. She took the phone, Youngjae`s breathing becoming distant until she ended the call, setting the phone on the table behind him.

He allowed her. He wanted to forget just for the night. He wanted the numbness. His fingers trembled as they fisted her short hair at the back of her neck, easing her down on him. She took him with a filthy moan vibrating around him. He tilted his head back, a dull thud where it rested against the wall, his hips bucking into the wet warmth surrounding him.

“J-Jae……”

Choi Youngjae was coming back to Seoul tomorrow.

►►

Choi Dong Joon closed his eyes as long soft fingers began to message his flesh, releasing the tension in his aching neck muscles. A whiff of sultry perfume reached his nostrils and he let himself lean back in his leather chair, both to relax and get closer to the addicting smell.

"Rough night?" the owner of the hands that were beginning to work their magic, purred suggestively. The sound once upon a time acting like euphoria, heating his blood and hardening his body. Now, it did nothing but grate on his nerves, the tone akin to nails on a chalkboard.

Patting her hands, a sign to stop her wandering touch. He gave her a sideway smile, feeling his facial muscles protesting while stretching to bare his teeth at her.

He wasn't always like this, nor were his feelings this cold towards her. There was a time when she was all he saw, all he breathed. Blinded by her and her young beauty, he was swept unaware in her web of seduction and manipulations. It wasn't until recently that he had started feeling a little bit more free, the spell she wove around him, lifting bit by bit.

Suzy was not always like this …correction... he hadn't seen her for what she was; a conniving scheming gold digger, looking for a sugar daddy to drive into an early grave after convincing him to turn all of his assets to her and only her, driving his only child away from him in the process.

He looked at his desk and frowned. He didn't know why he hadn't noticed the missing pictures before or how they were replaced by others. Pictures of his only son was gone. Pictures of his family were absent as well. The shelves were also void of any sign of his old life, a life before Suzy. Instead, pictures of her were almost everywhere. On his desk, on the shelves, a big portrait hanging on one of the walls, a similar one was in the living room, the dining room and their bedroom. She had invaded his life, took it by storm, wrecking everything, the only traces left were the ones that belonged to Suzy and Suzy alone. His lover after nineteen years of failed marriage.

After his divorce, the single multi-millionaire business tycoon was back into the market of eligible bachelors despite having a nineteen year old son. Suzy had studied in the same university as Youngjae. The two had become fast friends, Youngjae not knowing that he was being used as a means to an end. He had been introduced to the young lady on a dinner ball he had held where Youngjae had confided in his father that he had a crush and intended to ask her on a proper date after the party. He had felt guilty when, he a man twice her age, had fallen for her charms and the way she`d call him ‘Oppa’ while she got down on her knees and took him into . Once aware of Suzy`s new status in the Choi clan, as his lover; his son and Suzy had a falling out.

His son had felt used, and his lover felt justified and he had been blinded by Suzy that he felt estranged from his own flesh and blood. Two years were apparently the limit to his son's patience before he left Korea to join his mother and being over twenty-one he had no choice but to agree to it.

At first he had felt happy, the mansion no longer icy with the cold stares of the two strong-willed people he had known. He ate his meals relaxed, enjoying devoting his attention to the beauty next to him, no stress of offending his child with showing affection in public. They had the house to themselves and he was no longer worried about keeping the sounds of to a minimum and they had enjoyed christening many rooms in the large mansion. The novelty soon wore off. Now it had been close to two months since he had taken Suzy to his bed. The latter had been more than willing, in his bed, in his car, in his office, each and every place but he had always an excuse to put the brakes on her advances and turn her down. Much like he just did a few minutes ago.

"Not now Suzy. I am a little busy here!"

"You're always busy Oppa." She whined as she turned around to sit on the plush leather couch opposite of his desk, crossing her long bare legs suggestively, trying to tempt him. The sight of those legs did something to him a long time ago, now it filled him with nothing but boredom. It was always the same tricks with Suzy. He did desire ual intimacy but he found himself longing for companionship. Someone who asked about his day, who would cook for him, pick out his suit for a ball or a business dinner. Something his ex-wife used to did. At that time he despised it but now he found himself missing those silly acts of love.

"I need to go over the last details for the security team. I can't have any slip ups or incompetence."

"You're changing staff?" He arched a graying eyebrow elegantly at her raised panicked tone, knowing full well what she was fearing.

"Merely rearranging. After all, I can't have my only child and heir unprotected, now can I?" he stressed the words 'only' and 'heir' on purpose, becoming aware of her true intentions. He had asked himself why he kept her with him if he knew what she was after, the big fat wallet in his back pocket. His answer, payback. Show her that no one tricked a Choi and got away with it; a lesson he learned from Youngjae when he had Suzy pick up a priceless diamond bracelet he had gotten to his ‘step-mom’ from a pond of mud, her humiliation to tricking him.

"Youngjae is coming back?"

"The jet should be touching ground as we speak. So Jaebum is there to pick him up."

"Jaebum?"

"Yes. He is his bodyguard just like he once was!"

►►

Incheon International Airport

He stood his back straight and his shoulder squared back. His face was hidden behind the black aviator sunglasses, lips firmly pressed; emotionless. His hands were clasped in front of him, his feet evenly apart. Dressed from head to toe in black, he was the primal example of the perfect bodyguard. On the driver's side, a similarly dressed man stood waiting to get behind the wheel and start driving the white Mercedes. He was posted on the passenger side, ready to open the door to the backseat and slip in his afterwards. Two black cars were parked behind them, with four men each posted strategically, covering every corner, eyes open to any possible threat, each one armed and trained to take down threats in the least amount of time.

They all bore the same emotionless expression, from the outside as well as the inside. They appeared calm and collected, focused on the job; providing optimal security to the Choi heir. His mission was no different except from the inside he was burning with turmoil. His eyes, had they not been covered would have betrayed him. He had seen them first thing in the morning as he stared in the mirror after his long shower. They had been bright, unusually so. The usually guarded black eyes were stripped down bare to the very basics of feelings. Angry at him, pained because of him and longing for him.

He could feel his own irregular heartbeats thudding against his ribs, with enough force to be physically painful. As the jet came to a stop, the door opened and the stairs were being lowered to touch the asphalt. The barn where the jet was always kept, was property of Mr. Choi thus the cars were allowed inside to pick up the lone passenger on board.

He willed himself to stay in place and not move a muscle against the instinct that roared to life that demanded that he walk closer to Youngjae, see his face, touch it, touch him, and maybe he could whisk them away from the guards, from his father and from him, Youngjae himself.

He heard the engines roar to life yet the distinctive sound of his boots clicking on the ground was getting louder and louder the closer he got to him.

His face was partially hidden by the hate he had on his head and a pair of aviator sunglasses that obscured the eyes he had longed to see. The once strawberry blonde hair was now dyed a rich brown-reddish shade, shaved off on both sides, the rest pushed back by hair products no doubt. He took stock of his charge, of his former lover, his eyes whilst hidden behind his own sunglasses roved hungrily over each inch of Youngjae who was looking ahead in his direction as he walked closer. He wore a simple black jeans and Jaebum had to swallow hard from their tight fit around his hips and thighs. He had on a simple white shirt and jacket. He looked flawless, as if he had stepped out from a photo-shoot. His sense of style changing as he had been exposed to a whole new world, one he had explored for a year alongside with his mother.

He turned, opened the door to the expensive vehicle and waited. He was within arm's reach, Jaebum could reach out and touch him. Feel flesh and bone and Youngjae.

Youngjae was at the door and in a second he would be inside the car and they could start their way back to the prince`s castle, where the poor servant boy couldn't follow. He paused and even with the heeled army boots, he barely reached under his chin and he was reminded with a time where he found out that Choi Youngjae`s head stopped two inches under his chin.

He was facing him now, pausing and he waited with baited breath as his head lifted, revealing itself to his eyes. He could see his reflection on Youngjae`s glasses before he lifted them up and over his head. His lips were naturally painted pink, round flawless cheeks, dark curled lashes fluttering until they reveal the hidden pearls inside. Two brown ones stared unblinking back at him, holding his own captive even behind his dark shades. His face showed nothing of the emotional wreck that called him last night. They both held their masks in place. The cool ice prince and the cold-hearted guardian.

Once the trunk was closed with his suitcases inside, Youngjae lowered himself inside, staring ahead. Carefully, he closed the door and slid in the comfortably leather seat of the car.

Pressing on the flesh-colored earpiece, he gave firm directions as to how they will commute and the roads they're going to use. The Choi security staff preferred to travel on the main roads instead of back roads where chances of an attack was likely taking advantage of closed-quarters and the low population.

One of the black cars drove ahead, and they followed it, the third one falling behind them. He itched to rub the back of his neck, where a patch of skin was visible where his shirt ended, his hair not long enough to cover it up. He could feel two holes beginning to form.

He dialed the private line of his boss, Youngjae`s father and waited until the call got picked up.

"We are thirty minutes away, sir. Anything else Mr. Choi?"

"Just keep my son alive, Jaebum."

The ride was silent except for the occasional orders he gave. It wasn't until the pulled up to the iron gates of the mansion that Youngjae had spoken up.

"What are they doing here?"

The 'they' he was referring to was a swarm of flashing cameras and people blocking their entrance. As far as he knew, no one was told of his comeback, hell even he wasn't informed until a day before his flight. His father wanted a smooth and safe return to his only child, not wanting to alert anyone who might have an agenda against him that his Achilles heels had returned home.

Once they were spotted, like a swarm of bees, they surrounded the car, blinding flashes of the cameras and microphones were being shoved at the windows, over the ceiling to try to pick up anything.

They drove up the mansion, the gates closing behind them, the shouts of the press ignored. The car came to a stop and he sighed, knowing as his personal guard, assigned by his father, that he had to watch over him constantly; within and outside the Choi mansion. His room had been moved to the same floor, next to Youngjae`s own room. It was just them, alone and the thought was scarier and nerve wrecking than facing the firing squad.

Youngjae was back and he had no idea what to say or how he was supposed to act around him. Should he act as his personal shadow, all about the job, without any regards to the fact that they had been lovers? What if they ruined any chance of getting what they had lost, what Youngjae had thrown away carelessly?

Youngjae stepped from the car, brushing invisible lint from his jeans before starting to walk to the front door. Jaebum followed, falling a step behind the younger. Two lines of maids and butlers were standing on each side of the marble staircase that would take him to the upper floor. They all bowed, one maid in her black and white French maid uniform stepped forwards and took his jacket and sunglasses, awaiting further instructions.

"Have my things moved to my room. Is my father home?"

"He is in the study young master. Do you wish for us to tell him of your arrival?"

"No. Tell him I am in my room and I don't wish to be disturbed."

He walked, boots clicking on shiny marble floor and started to ascend the stairs. He stood still, face looking ahead as Suzy stopped on her way down, facing them. Former friends stood within a foot of each other, not looking at one another, and everyone waited for one of them to push the other down the stairs. That was how much they hated each other.

It was Youngjae who turned, at the top of the stairs before they staircase split into two, one to the right and the other to the left. His eyes bypassed the other girl, landing squarely on Jaebum. His full, usually pouting, lips stretching lazily and Jaebum found himself gulping nervously. This wasn’t the sweet innocent Youngjae that he used to pick up from college in his first year, or the one that blushed to the roots of his hair when he saw him bare-chested in the swimming pool, or the one who touched him so softly in a night where he took Jaebum`s breath and Jaebum took his innocent. This person was strong… no Youngjae was always strong but this one seemed much more than that, aware of the power he held and the one he would inherit someday. More assertive, mature and not willing to be pushed around, certainly not by Suzy, a woman who was trying to become the sole person responsible for the Choi fortune. This was Choi Youngjae 2.0. New and enhanced and all his.

"Aren't you coming, Jaebummie hyung?"

He removed his shades, pocketing them before following up the stairs. He paused a stair away from where Youngjae was facing him. With a nod, he turned and took the left stairs that would lead them to their secluded section of the mansion. He paused before he made to follow. Leaning closer, his breath would surely tickle the other woman as he whispered in her ear.

"I'll never be yours, Suzy."

He stepped back, fixing her with cold mocking gaze as his eyes looked up and down at her, scoffing like he found her severely lacking.

"It's always Youngjae. Always!"

►►

Strong broad shoulders broke the mercury rippling water. The pool twinkled with light. The glass ceiling allowing the bright stars to shine on the vast water. It illuminated the room casting shadows along the walls. The silence was broken by the occasional sharp and the sound of angry splashes of water.

He felt his muscles straining against the effort he was putting. He supposed it has been a while since he took a dip in the tempting water while this angry; this tense.

Standing in the shadows as the Choi mansion buzzed with non-stopping activities was tiresome. It has been almost a year since he last took such a permanent residence in the mansion. That all changed with the return of the Choi heir.

Before the sudden return of the young heir, not that he minded, he had been reassigned to be on Mr. Choi personal team. It meant more time at the firm, less time at the mansion. He didn't mind. He welcomed it. Anything was better than being surrounded by reminders of Youngjae every second of every day. He was bound to either commit mass murder or commit suicide. It had been bad enough that he could no longer go back to his loft. It had been tainted, his image haunting him. Laughing in one corner, breathless in another. Phantom giggles and soft sighs had woken him up for weeks in the middle of the night after he left. And no matter how much he washed his sheets and pillows, they always smelled of him, of them. They just wouldn't leave much like their owner left him.

For the life of him he could not figure out what had gone wrong in the span of the five hours they have been apart. Gods knew he had tormented himself enough to the point where he had become obsessed. He had been consumed to the point of madness. He hadn't known how much Youngjae had gotten under his skin, in his veins and coursing through his blood until he had tossed Jaebum aside to suffer from a severe case of withdrawals and a sudden feel of lose.

He missed a second and his next was sloppy and he cursed under his breath. The young heir hasn't been back for a day and he was already wreaking havoc in his life, more so than the day he first met him.

He could still remember the way he descend the stairs, as cheesy as it may sound, books against his chest, soft caramel hair dancing as the wind picked up speed. He was unaware of the trails of broken heart he had left in his wake. He was surrounded by three other handsome young men around his age but he looked bored out of his mind, yet polite enough to smile and give the illusion of being interested in their talk.

The college campus had been packed with students, almost too much. A perfect place to try something. He had taken note of all the possible entry and exit points and several plans had developed just in case. He had never realized that the threat would be from someone he passed over as a best friend.

He had done his homework as he waited in the car for school to be over. Kim Yugyeom, Park Jinyoung and the school`s princess, Suzy. Never had he thought that the day where Suzy would become the lover of Youngjae`s father and later his step mother and the once best friends would be at war with each other.

That day was three years ago when Youngjae was nineteen and life was simple. He hadn’t known that a year later he would be ready to give his life to save his and a year after that he would watch the younger as he slept in his bed. And no matter how hard he had glued his feet to the ground in regards of their affair, nothing had prepared him for the night he left.

‘This,’ Youngjae motioned to the space between them ‘has to end. Don’t you get it?’ He closed the distance, clutching the lapels of his open shirt. Jaebum had put it on inside-out in a hurry and panic as he saw Youngjae dressing in the darkness of his bedroom. Youngjae`s voice quivered and his brown eyes shown under the dim lighting of his balcony. The material crumbling between his small trembling fists as he looked up at the elder with so much despair that Jaebum was forced to look away. He shook him. He was strong or maybe it was him that was weakening. ‘We`re over, Jaebum!” he let him go and he staggered from both his release and the effect of his words.

‘We shouldn’t have begun in the first place.’

He stilled his body and ceased movement. He was in the middle of the pool, the moonlight flirting with the droplets of water that clung selfishly to his back.

The events played in his mind as if they happened mere seconds ago. The pain just as fresh.

Why, Youngjae?

He took a deep breath, trying to stay alert and not be caught in the web of memories that were forming in his head. He refused to go back to that place in his mind no matter how much he wanted to become that man again.

The stillness of the water was broken and he cursed himself for being so distracted by him again that he missed the presence of another being.

Soft hands traced the lines of his back before going around his waist, teasingly tugging at his swimming trunks.

Their owner pressed flush against his back. Full s temptingly pushed against his frame.

Lips touched him boldly and he felt the hint of tongue against his flesh. He tried to quiet the demons in his head, they were loud tonight with his return. Involuntary, he flashed back to a time where he came to him in the darkness of the night for a few stolen minutes together.

He brushed the wet strands back and away from Youngjae`s round face. Big eyes shone bright and his cheeks were flushed a pretty shade of pink. His small hands rested on his shoulders while Jaebum trailed his down the small of other`s back, down to encircle full round hips.

His heart pounded against his ribs threatening to break them and he feared Youngjae would hear how the beat raced with him being that close to Jaebum. He had no idea that an innocent invitation from his charge/crush would turn this risqué.

"You scare me so bad!"

Youngjae shivered at the idea of him so out of control. Doing something crazy, dangerous.

"Would you kill for me?" It felt so wrong to like the idea.

"I would. I have."

"Would you die for me?" equally wrong. Equally thrilling.

"Yes. A million times over!"

"Jaebum!" a feminine sigh brought him back to reality. It did nothing for him as it should to any hot-blooded male. It had the opposite effect.

He regretted allowing himself that moment of weakness with her. It was all she had needed from him to go ahead with her plans to have her way with him.

Suzy made it no secret that she wanted him as a lover.

The fortune of his boss filled her pocket and she needed him to fill her bed.

That had been the plan and she made no qualms that she would do whatever it took to see it through.

And he had been idiot enough to fall into her trap in a moment of weakness.

Drunk, angry and basically carrying all the symptoms of a heart-broken man, he had sought comfort in countless of women. Hoping that it would ease the excruciating pain that was slowly eating away at him.

Suzy had been there, and he was convinced that it had been planned rather than fated to happen. And even though he had stopped before it was too late and where regrets did nothing to save him from the wrath of his boss, Suzy had seen the act of weakness as a green light. That had been a year ago. No matter what he did or said, she kept at it. Determined to the very end regardless of the fact that her husband, should he know, would no doubt end them both.

If anything, Mr. Choi hated anyone making a fool of him by going behind his back.

He didn’t want to know what would happen if one day Mr. Choi knew that the man he entrusted with his one and only son had not only fallen in love with the young man but had taken away his innocence as well.

"Jaebum," her voice purred in his ear again and he shivered. And he knew he shouldn't. Suzy would mistake it for pleasure rather than revulsion "I miss you. I need you." She swam around and faced him. He glanced at her fleetingly. She was gorgeous, no denying that. Her bikini was revealing, too much so and he rolled his eyes at her pathetic attempt to tempt him.

Silly of her. A man loyal to one would never be satisfied with another. A notion Suzy refused to understand.

"Suzy," he removed her hands away from him” how many times do I have to tell you and show you that I am not interested." He swam to the edge of the pool, pulled himself up and began drying himself. She followed him and stood practically on top of him. "What about that night?" she cooed and tried to slip her hands inside his swimming trunks. "If you've forgotten, I haven't. I think about it all day and all night, in the dark, all alone, in my bed...I,” She paused and Jaebum wondered briefly if whoever was in charge of things heard his pleas for her to shut up. He found her looking, smirking over his bare shoulder at something behind them. He turned around and his stomach dropped. Youngjae was there and if by the devastation and disgust on his face was anything to go by, he had definitely been standing there long enough to have heard everything and came to his own conclusion, which Jaebum knows were very much close to the truth about what happened.

“Youngjae…”

He had taken a step but stopped when it served to make Youngjae snap out of his daze, sneer at them with so much distaste that Jaebum wished he hadn`t seen before he turned and headed back inside.

Suzy sighed and rested her chin on his shoulder and grinned, her words coming out bored “Let the brat be, he`s just still sulking I wasn`t interested in him. He can`t just quite understand that I need men not little boys...”

►►

It wasn’t that Youngjae was expecting anything. On the contrary. He knew nothing changed or was allowed to for that matter. It had been silly of him to think otherwise. But again, he had been young and in love. He still was though both things bound to blind one`s sight and fly them away from reality. So it shouldn’t matter what he had witnessed moments ago.

Right?

His hands shook as laced up his tan safety boots. The images were still dancing in his mind, projecting themselves from every side and angled that one would wish to see not that he wanted to see them. Ever.

Never had he imagined, so freshly returned, that he would witness the man he loves…loved with another; his step-mother of all people. He knew Suzy was not above going around and hooking up with the entire home and office staff, men and women alike.

The lights in the pool area had been on and his feet had dragged him there before he had thought it through. He had always taken a swim right before dinner time, Youngjae chuckled. How times changed where he had used those facts, Jaebum`s stubborn habits against him. Where Jaebum`s strict routine had aided him in getting closer to the older man. And now, said habits have turned against Youngjae. Those precious seconds in the pool area that the lovers once enjoyed, have become a place for another also trying to get closer to the dark and mysterious bodyguard. And from what Youngjae had seen, Jaebum had not made an effort to push his employer`s wife away.

"What about that night?"

Cruel images conjured themselves in Youngjae`s mind, twisting and mocking. What was that night that Suzy spoke of? When was it? Questions that tormented him as he ran to his room upstairs. It had taken him minutes that felt more like hours to get his bearings together. And now he stood, ready to... he didn't know what for but what mattered at the end of the day was that he was ready.

"Young master," one of the maids assigned to his floor bowed, her voice timid "The car is ready downstairs."

"Did you tell them my instructions?"

"Yes, sir. You father wishes to see you before you go. What should I tell him?"

He looked at the mirror as he shrugged on the black leather jacket that was two-sizes big on him, part of his impromptu revenge plan.

Let that mess with his head like he`s messing with mine.

"Tell him you missed me by a minute!"

For almost half an hour, Jaebum sat in the car; waiting. He had no knowledge of any outing tonight for any of the Choi family. That alone made him stressed out. He had no time to prepare or to go over the routes or check out the place they were heading for.

The front door opened and he started the car. The requested choice of attire puzzled him more. 'Dress casual' that had been the order, be it the only one he got after he stepped out of the pool area. So he dressed causal. Dark jeans, dark t-shirt, finishing it off with dark jeans jacket.

The door to the passenger seat opened and he watched in slow motion as the man who haunted him for years on end slipped inside so casually. The slamming of the door shook him out of his shock. In a matching outfit of dark jeans and shirt, Choi Youngjae, Choi heir and his tormentor sat beside him unaffected unlike Jaebum was.

"You`re not Joon!" He blurted out his first thought watching his charge, his former lover just minutes after the pool incident. Briefly, his eyes moved over the very distinctive tear near the neckline of the leather jacket Youngjae had on. The same place his own had just one identical to it. The same leather jacket that has been missing for almost a year.

Could it be?

"How observant." his voice was ice cold, eyes staring forward. "If you`re done staring, I very much would like to go now." He spared him a glance and raised an eyebrow when he did nothing.

"Is something wrong, Jaebum-ssi?"

"Just waiting for the rest. I don’t see the rest of the guards. Are they joining us in a separate car?"

"Nope," the 'P' sounded with a pop. “I gave them the night off. Seeing how you`re my personal shadow for the duration of my stay here, you`ll just have to tag along with me.”

Jaebum had an inkling that tonight would be disastrous on all ends. Nothing good came out when Youngjae ditched his father`s rules and rebelled.

►►

It was stifling. The air was hot and humid. Taking gulps of it did nothing to cool the hot gyrating bodies. Instead it brushed the sweating skin teasingly, shifting when bodies shifted. It amplified the feeling of arousal. Stimulating bodies into overdrive. Hormones raged and danced, uncaring of wound tight control.

The music pounded through the crowded room, bodies gyrated and hands took advantage of close quarters and dim lights. Hot rhythms and cold liquor was the theme tonight, as it was virtually every night at club 'Temple of Temptation'. The latest in a series of clubs owned by the Song family, Youngjae`s paternal uncle from his mother`s side, that was located in Gangnam district, half of which Song and heir owned as well. It was crammed in an old warehouse, the exterior looked just like one would suspect a warehouse to look but the interior was a maze of dance halls, seated drinking nooks, bars and game rooms. The place was three enormous stories, each floor outfitted as something different; the main floor was a virtual inferno. There were several walls encased in glass that seemed to be perpetually burning with hot flames. Red and orange motion lights illuminated the room and two huge glass tubes which periodically erupted with bursts of dancing flames were centered on the dance floor. The other floors ranged from a Caribbean flavor on the second with Latin music and live palm and plantain trees throughout, to the third floor which was painted completely black and was illuminated by thousands of tiny white lights, giving the impression of dancing among the stars.

Jaebum didn’t like it one bit for two very glaringly obvious reasons. One being that he had never been there before and therefor the layout was a mystery to him. Sure he had managed to scan the entry and exit points and the blind spots, taking notes of the cameras which he was sure were there for shows. The crowd was both an advantage and disadvantage rolled up into one awesome package. It would make it hard to spot them and it would make it harder to get away and the worst was he could so easily lose Youngjae in it. The second reason was being Youngjae himself. The young Choi heir made no qualms about his status, buying drinks and drawing attention. He caught his eyes a few times and he could see the challenge in them, the rebellious streak Jaebum knew very well. Youngjae had snuck out a lot in the past, to escape Jaebum at first and then to see Jaebum.

It all happened so quickly after that, mostly a blur but he knew he`d be able to recall it very vividly because he would never forget the look of terror crossing Youngjae`s face when he realized what was happening. Jaebum was standing one minute near Youngjae who was conversing so lively and animatedly with Kim Yugyeom and the usual party had now turned into ‘let`s celebrate Youngjae`s return’ kind of party and the next minute; he was pushing Youngjae`s head down amidst the screaming of the crowd. He had spotted the unusual laser pointing around in random directions as if to throw anyone watching before it rested center point on the back of Youngjae`s head. Jaebum thanked years of honed instincts and reflexes as he pushed past Yugyeom to reach Youngjae, a beat later the glass of the fish tank the duo were in front of shattered into bits and pieces. For once, Jaebum was happy that Youngjae was not putting a fight as he pushed past his friends and acquaintances to get them to safety. In fact, Youngjae followed him with practiced ease, slipping his hand into Jaebum`s and keeping his head down and sticking to corners. Safety came as they stepped out of the random gunfire and into the hallway that would lead them out of the club. He vaguely noticed how none of the Song security team was to be seen knowing very well the beloved nephew of their boss was inside. He casted a look over his shoulder and he locked eyes with Youngjae. His charge and former lover looked shaken and no matter how many attempts has been made on Youngjae`s life since Jaebum became his assigned guardian, his reaction would be the same. Jaebum guessed that some things you can`t ever get used to.

“Okay?”

Youngjae nodded and Jaebum hurtled them through a set of stairs going around the back of the building, another exit point he had noticed as he circled the building before going in. He felt a small squeeze around his fingers and looked back.

“Okay?”

The small word made Jaebum`s stomach whirl and drop, the magnitude of concern showing in that one simple word soared his heart. Youngjae cared. His Youngjae cared after all.

Their exit could not have gone any smoother and that alone raised alarming bells in Jaebum`s head. He was taught when things seemed too easy, it meant he was walking into a trap. The trap came when he and Youngjae made a dash from the building towards the car.

The first bulled whizzed by them so fast he thought he might have imagined it. Three masked figures have rounded the building and it was obvious that the group`s intention and secondary plan was to flush them out in the open, clear shot instead of amidst a rowdy crowd.

He drew his own gun and tucked Youngjae behind him as he cleared a path to their car. It worked until he heard Youngjae gasp and his attention flattered and a bullet nicked his jacket and the burn had been so painful and so sudden he almost dropped his piece.

“DRIVE!”

He got in after Youngjae who started the car and peeled away with a loud screech, jerking the car from side to side and Jaebum hoped because he wanted to lose the trail of gunshot not because he was still a lousy driver.

With Jaebum`s instructions and directions, it wasn’t long before their tail was lost and Jaebum had them parked in an abandoned alley and taking a taxi. They rode in the back and in the dark quiet cab and for the first time in almost a year, Youngjae reached for Jaebum first with trembling hands and teary eyes.

►►

“Sorry.”

Youngjae bit his lip and looked up to find Jaebum with his eyes firmly shut, tight-lipped and breathing harshly. The cotton ball he`s been dapping the burn mark with was dipped with alcohol and soaked with dark blood.

They had reached the loft undetected and after sending a quick message and address for pick up to Youngjae`s father, the two made their way to Jaebum`s unknown loft in relative silence with Youngjae jumping at the smallest of noises, unconsciously pressing closer to Jaebum.

The night`s events were still fresh on his mind and he could not quite stop the tremors in his hands more so when Jaebum shrugged out of his shirt with a loud groan and Youngjae had to stare dumbly at the breathtaking physique of his former lover.

The year apart had not diminished Jaebum`s beauty but only enhanced it. He had grown into his muscles and filled out even more if that was possible, his shoulders broader and arms thicker. He wasn`t surprised by the scarring marring his back and skin, his fingers itching to run soothingly over them. His heart aching to reach out for Jaebum as more than a bodyguard and his charge.

He had strode over when it was obvious that Jaebum would not be able to care for his wound and with shaky hands, Youngjae took over.

“`s okay”

The words were shoved out of his mouth and he remembered a similar time when Jaebum was the one dapping at his skin from when he fell from the motorbike, distracting him with passionate kisses.

Would Jaebum let him distract his mind by pulling him for a kiss?

Of course not, he hates you. He has Suzy now.

He bit his lip and blinked against the sting in his eyes. Had Jaebum forgotten him so easily? Had he truly been only a duty to the older man? Even after everything they have shared for almost a year? A baggage? An annoying burden he had to carry because no one wanted the job? Had it been all a lie?

“I’m telling you that I’m not in love with that brat. It`s a pain in the and I couldn’t stand this for just a bit. It`s a constant headache with all the sneaking and scheming going on.”

Something within him rebelled at the thought of Jaebum deceiving him or playing him. What he had felt for him and what they had was true, of that Youngjae had been blindly sure, but the things Jaebum had said to Jackson that day had been so convincingly voiced, Jaebum believed them to be true.

“I’m just doing my job. It is my job to protect. Of course I will be worried if anyone gets hurt. I don’t want to get fired. THAT’S ALL.”

“Youngjae…”

Jaebum had now grasped his wrist within his and was towering over him and Youngjae refused to look up from their feet. He could not understand why a year worth of self-control, of keeping himself from running back into the arms of the first person he loved and what he knew for sure would be the last had come crumbling down tonight. He could blame the emotional distress from being shot at, which was nothing new if you were a Choi, or what he had witnessed between Jaebum and Suzy in the pool but he knew it wouldn’t be true.

He looked up, eyes shimmered in the darkness, confused. Jaebum`s mirrored what was probably in his eyes. He withdrew his hand and the flash of hurt that crossed the elder’s face made Youngjae regret the action almost immediately. Instead, his hand reached up and cupped the back of Jaebum`s neck, keeping him in place, as he pressed himself up. He paused giving him a chance to turn away.

His eyes fluttered close as he brushed the lips fleetingly, feeling his knees ready to buckle to the floor. He took a step closer; brushing the trembling lips once more before settling over his completely. On a heavy sigh, he parted them beneath the softness of Jaebum`s lips and brought his body flush against the firm lines and edges of Jaebum. In the back of his mind, he was aware that Jaebum was kissing him back. Out of pure instinct resulting from millions of years of desiring tall handsome men, he grabbed onto the broad shoulders, rubbing against him as he stood on his tippy toes, giving himself an extra inch in height. He felt Jaebum`s hands fanning his neck and brushing his jaw, running his tongue along Youngjae`s bottom teeth, his own straining to follow. With a soft sigh, he allowed Jaebum to deepen the kiss.

They broke apart, heaving much needed air, foreheads resting against one another. Against his chest, he felt the crazy tempo of Jaebum`s own beating heart.

“..I…”

He wanted to tell the older how much he still loved him, how he never stopped, how he shouldn`t have left in the first place, how…

“You left me… “

►►

The confrontation is just what they expected. Lots of yelling and frustrations, their roles revised now. Jaebum pushing Youngjae away and Youngjae trying to break through the walls between them, ones he had built almost a year ago.

Sleep evaded them and when Jaebum reached for Youngjae in a heated moment, the younger gave in. Unlike before, their reunion wasn`t sweet, clawing hands and imprints of hands on skin. Hot tears scalding Youngjae`s neck from Jaebum pressed his face.

Youngjae admitted to everything and how pushed by Suzy and what he mistakenly overheard from Jaebum talking to Jackson, he had made a decision controlled by insecurities. Jaebum told him how stupid he had been and he should have talked to him, how he cost them time together, damaged both of them.

Jaebum later pulled him to his chest and tipped Youngjae`s head and told him he loved him, would always love him.

They would have many things to work through, built their trust in each other once more, find a way to get rid of Suzy; Jaebum joked to make his young lover smile, Youngjae scowled and pouted and pulled Jaebum for a firm kiss, whispering ‘mine’.

“It`s always you, Youngjae. It`s always been you!”