Disclaimer : Vomit, curse word

***

The shaking of Kyungsoo's leg under the table had become a habit that Jongin started to notice, despite how much he tried not to pay any attention to the penguin.

Jongin didn't like the habit that Kyungsoo had developed. It wasn't because he found it annoying, but more because he started to worry about the older.

It started the day of the fight, which was now officially one week ago.

That night, while Baekhyun was getting punched by Zitao over and over again, Kyungsoo was sitting on the stairs, trying to calm his nerves. Jongin never saw the older so... scared. Usually, Kyungsoo has a neutral expression on, but this time, it was so different.

Before he could think of a reason not to, Jongin found himself walking over to the penguin, kneeling down and rubbing Kyungsoo's knees in an attempt to comfort him. Kyungsoo had his eyes covered with his hands, so he didn't know it was Jongin.

And then Heechul walked in, and then the police came, and then everything happened all at once. Jongin and Kyungsoo went back to the way they were, not talking.

Jongin blamed himself for this. Kyungsoo offered to be friends again, to pretend like the kiss never even happened, but Jongin couldn't do it. He wanted to rid his mind of the penguin, he wanted to get rid of his feelings for the older. But seeing him every day, living with him, made the task much harder for Jongin. He couldn't be friends with Kyungsoo without wanting more. That was impossible.

So now, the two sat next to each other, silently eating dinner. It was a strange occurrence when the pair were sitting next to one other, but it just so happened that the only spot left for Kyungsoo at the table was right next to Jongin.

Nobody talked, the substitute caregiver was watching over all the boys like a hawk. 

After dinner, the routine of chores and showers followed as normal.

At school the next day, Jongin found himself not being able to focus on the lesson, but rather thinking about his penguin. 

Jongin constantly thought about Kyungsoo during the school day. It was a fact, and the younger didn't like it. But his thoughts on the older today weren't like they normally were. Jongin found himself worrying about Kyungsoo's well being.

Kyungsoo's anxiety always showed up when there were big fights. The penguin never liked the yelling, the anger, or the sound of bones breaking.

All Jongin wanted to do was comfort Kyungsoo, hug him and let him know that everything was going to be okay. But Jongin couldn't do that, he was a coward...

"Jongie," Dahee said, prompting Jongin to look up at her. "Lets go eat."

"Oh." He said, not realizing that it was already time for lunch. "Okay."

Jongin didn't eat lunch a lot anymore. He would always skip with some guys and go smoke before class started again, but Dahee was growing suspicious, so Jongin went along with her.

"Jongie, you have to eat. You've been looking sick." Dahee noted at the lunch table, their other friends not listening as they were wrapped up in their own conversations. 

"I'm not sick, just a little tired."

Dahee didn't look satisfied with Jongin's answer, but let it go when he finally picked up the chopsticks and began eating.

Kyungsoo never came around the cafeteria during lunch time, so Jongin never saw the penguin there. The older typically spent his free time in the library, reading a new book every week. So there was certainly a shock when Jongin saw Kyungsoo walk through the large lunch room, the other looking green and yellow.

When it came to Kyungsoo, Jongin lost all sense of what he should and shouldn't do.

Like, maybe Jongin shouldn't have just gotten up from his table mid-conversation with Dahee and follow Kyungsoo to wherever the older was going, but Jongin did it anyway.

Jongin didn't think about how he must of hurt Dahee in that moment, his thoughts solely on the older boy who looked like he was going to vomit.

Jongin pushed through the doors, entering the empty hallway where Kyungsoo went in moments before. Except now, the younger had lost the penguin.

How could Kyungsoo just, disappear?

Not even a second later, Jongin got the answer to his question... when he heard sicking sounds coming from the boy's bathroom that was right around the corner.

Running into the bathroom, Jongin didn't even have to look anymore until he found the person he was looking for. Kyungsoo was kneeling against a toilet in a stall, hands gripping the edge as he puked again.

"Soo?" 

Kyungsoo didn't respond to the sound of his name, not being able to move.

"Soo." Jongin repeated, sitting down next to the older and putting his hand on Kyungsoo's back, rubbing it back and forth gently. 

The penguin took a couple more minutes until he could pass the sicking feeling that made him vomit so suddenly, leaning back and flushing the toilet while putting the cover down so Jongin didn't have to see. Kyungsoo grabbed some toilet paper, cleaning around his mouth.

"It's embarrassing for you to see me like this." Kyungsoo said. "H-how'd you know I was here?" The older asked, catching his breath in between words.

"I saw you in the cafeteria, and you looked sick... so I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"You don't look that good yourself, Jongin." Kyungsoo paused, realizing the words he had just used. "I-I mean, you look sick too. Have you been getting enough sleep?"

No. "Yes."

"Liar."

"It's not important."

"It is important. Sleep is very important."

Jongin scoffed. "Yeah, sleep." He muttered under his breath. 

"It's important that you are feel okay." Kyungsoo paused. "Why haven't you been able to sleep, Jongin?"

"Why else? The beds are like rock. Who can sleep like t-"

"You know what I mean." The older cut him off. "Why haven't you been able to sleep." He repeated the question, more serious this time as he gazed at the younger so intensely.

Jongin had to remember to breath. "I don't know. I just haven't. Has anybody been able to sleep since what happened?"

"With the fight?" Kyungsoo questioned even though it was implied. "You care about that? I didn't think it mattered to you."

"It doesn't." The younger replied, looking away from the penguin and shifting his gaze to the floor. "You matter to me."

Kyungsoo felt his heart skip a beat, blush rising to his cheeks. "W-what?"

"It's not like you didn't know." Jongin tried to play it off, but his voice was small and weak.

The penguin did know. Of course he knew. After all, the younger did confess to loving him one time, but it still made Kyungsoo wonder.

"You haven't been getting sleep... because of me?" Kyungsoo asked, dumbfounded. Jongin nodded like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "But, what?"

Jongin sighed, still not looking at the older. "You haven't been okay since the fight. And it worries me, okay?"

Okay? No. It was not just okay.

"I..... I worry you?"

"As if that wasn't ing obvious." Jongin answered bitterly. Honestly, did Kyungsoo know nothing of the younger's feeling for him?

The older was at a loss for words. He didn't know where to start, because there was so many things he wanted to say. So many apologies and emotions he needed to say.

"Jongin..." Kyungsoo began at the only place he knew where to start. Silence creeped in the air around them, the older struggling for words. 

"I think I should go-" Jongin began to get up, but Kyungsoo immediately grabbed his wrist, pulling the younger back down. Jongin sat back, shocked at the action.

"Please," Kyungsoo begged. "I know I don't deserve it, but please, stay. Please."

Jongin blinked, not believing what Kyungsoo was saying. Maybe it was all just a dream? An incredibly realistic dream...

"I'm sorry." 

Jongin felt his heart squeeze. Why was Kyungsoo saying all this? Why now? Why during lunch? Why right after he just puked his guts out?

"I'm just scared." Kyungsoo admitted, letting go of his hold on the younger's wrist. "I don't know how I feel about you, it just doesn't make any sense. I can't like you. We're both guys. I can't like you like I do."

"You..... like me?" Jongin muttered, his voice trembling.

"I don't know what it is." The penguin wrapped his arms around himself. "I like you, I like you more than I should like you."

Jongin felt like saying something, but all he wanted was to hear more. All he wanted was to understand what Kyungsoo was going through, to understand what Kyungsoo was feeling.

"I miss being friends..."

Friends. That's all it would ever be, right?

"We can't be friends." Jongin stated, doing his best to not let his voice waver.

"Why not?"

"I already told you!" Kyungsoo shook at how Jongin's voice raised in a matter of seconds. "It not fair, Kyungsoo." Jongin let a tear slip out. A stupid tear. "You're always making me feel bad for feeling the way I do, and no matter how hard I try I just can't stop loving you. I can't pretend that these feeling don't exist," Jongin finally looked into the older's eyes. He saw how broken they were. "It's already hard enough seeing you every day. And you're always with Minseok-hyung." The younger hissed out the name. "I had no one before you. You were the first person who actually cared about me, the first person who took care of me. I can't just forget that."

Silence. More skin crawling silence. The type of silence that Jongin hated, because there was so much more to say, but both jut sat on the bathroom floor, looking at each other.

"Can we start over?" Kyungsoo asked, filling the silence. Jongin didn't understand, and his face showed it. "I-I mean, can you give me another chance to make this.... right?"

This was real. It had to be real. Jongin couldn't make this up. Jongin could never dream of Kyungsoo saying what he just did.

"I don't want to force you to do anything you don't what to do." Stupid Jongin and how much he loved stupid Kyungsoo. 

"I want to try again." Kyungsoo rushed out, his eyes pleading. "I want to be.... with y-you. I-I want to b-be your... boyfriend." Jongin felt his stomach do flips, his heart actually stopping this time. "I don't know what this is exactly, but I do know that I like you. I like you, Jongin. It's not love, yet. But, just give me time, please."

Jongin couldn't hide the smile that was playing on his lips. He couldn't even believe what was happening.

"I'll give you all the time in the world, Kyungsoo."

"So is that a yes?"

Jongin nodded. "It was always a yes."

Kyungsoo grinned, the baggage he felt being lifted at Jongin's playful expression. 

"I would kiss you right now, but after you just..." Jongin trailed off, looking towards the toilet, both laughing. 

"Later," Kyungsoo blushed again at his own words. Later. "But now, we should get back to class. I don't want to be late."

The pair both stood up. "Uh, Soo?" 

"Yeah?"

"The bell rang a couple of minutes ago."

Kyungsoo's smile faded and panic took over. Jongin chuckled at how cute his... boyfriend was.

"Really?" Jongin nodded in response. "But I didn't hear it ring." Kyungsoo's mouth gaped open. 

"Go to the nurse, Soo. You're sick."

"But-"

"No buts." Jongin cut the shorter off. "Sometime you should listen to your, boyfriend." Kyungsoo shifted under the younger's gaze when he used that word. Jongin couldn't say that word enough. Kyungsoo is his boyfriend. "I'll take you."

Jongin pulled the older along, despite the many complaints that Kyungsoo gave. 

Just like that, the two were back to normal. Of course, it wouldn't just go back to the way it was before. Kyungsoo still had to figure out his feelings, but that was okay. Jongin finally had Kyungsoo, and that's all he ever wanted.

Crazy. How all this happened in a bathroom. This will be a story to tell.

***

Does it seem rushed? The relationship between Kyungsoo and Jongin? I think it was about time they got together ;) because in my story, these things tend to drag out for days/weeks, so I think this was perfect timing for them to get together:) Anyways, tell me what you think! Hope you enjoyed the chapter! <3 And I really wanted to show the impact the fight had on everyone, because it wasn't just one small fight :o