After Taeil left, you repeated what you did when Hansol left. You learnt to live without him although the initial part was hard because over the time both of you had spent together, you had relied on Taeil so much. Now that he’s gone, it’s like the boat holding you on the surface of the water has finally sunken and the water threatens to drown you now. Initially, you felt like you couldn’t breathe. Then you taught yourself how to swim. Finally you’ve reached the shore and you’re walking on your own two feet with no support, but barely. Like with Hansol, life without Taeil was empty, but you’d have to learn to live without him nonetheless. Bit by bit you managed, it started by trying not to think about Taeil and slowly learning how to do things independently like learning how to stay awake while pulling late nighters without thinking that there will always be reliable Taeil around to wake you up when you accidently fell asleep. Learning to let go of Taeil was much easier than learning to let go of Hansol, after all, the emotions did not run that deep, the memories only considered an abum when the memories you shared with Hansol was enough to fill a room. But nonetheless, it still hurt.

When final year came around, work began to pile onto you and being so overwhelmed with mountains of work left you no time to think about either of them. When awake, your brain was too busy trying to loads books worth of information into your brain or getting your tired body from lecture to lecture. When asleep, your brain was too busy catching up on much needed sleep to even be able to conjure up dreams about them. By busying yourself, you have successfully gotten rid of the 2 of them from your mind.

But no amount of work will ever be able to get them out from your heart. One was a dear friend, the other was your childhood friend… and lover.

-

August 2018, the night before your graduation ceremony

“I can’t believe it’s been 5 years since you’ve been away from home.”

“I know. I can’t believe I managed to get myself through this crazy course for the past 5 years.”

“But no matter, you’re graduating with a master’s degree. It’s all been worth it Liz. Mum, Dad and I are sorry that we can’t be there for your graduation ceremony.”

“It’s fine Lisa. Save that money up. The family has already spent so many on my education, I wouldn’t dare to ask you spend more by flying over.”

Lisa hummed in response, unsure of how to reply me. After a few moments of silence, I spoke up.

“I really can’t wait to see all of you in Japan tomorrow.”

“Me too and have you packed your luggage yet? Your flight is arriving at 10pm right?”

“Yup, I got to be in time to catch the last train to your place.”

She chuckles from the other end, knowing my reason for saying so.

“I agree, the taxis here are just too expensive.” She sighs softly, her fatigue evident in her voice.

“You’re going to be home soon Liz. I’ve missed you so much.”

“Same here Lisa, I’ve missed you so much. I’d love to keep talking but I can tell you need rest. Please go to sleep once we’ve ended the call.”

“Hmm. Good night Liz.”

“Nights Lisa.”

Pressing your thumb to the red button on your screen, you set it down softly on your table. You brought on