'Yugyeom?' the elder raised one of his brows and pushed Youngjae immediately away from his chest. The younger looked shocked. He kept his mouth open as if he was about to say something but not a single word was coming out of it. Although he felt that there was a lot to explain, for some reason he didn't want to get them untangled for the brown haired. 'Youngjae, aren't you recognizing me? Damn, I'm Jaebum, you seriously don't know who I am?' the elder was scared enough to jump up and stare at the other sitting still and not even winking. Jaebum needed the space to clear his mind. Things got too messed up there.

 Youngjae dropped his regard and now was staring blankly at the floor. He seemed to be putting his memories together in his mind. While in reality, he was aware of everything now. He was just thinking about maybe pretending to not know who the other actually was. But then he erased it immediately from his head and looked at the worrying Jaebum, still observing him like a naturalist in the forest.

  'Jaebum' he accosted the elder eventually. The taller cowered next to the black haired slowly, who was sitting cross-legged. He listened closely and afraid in advance because Youngjae sounded more confused, than he, himself was. 'Can you take me home?' His eyes were about to get filled up with tears. His parents still didn't look for him. At least he didn't get any calls or text messages from them ever since he had been gone. It made him kind of depressed, but being with Jaebum, and going through much more dreary pain was not a pleasure either. And even, it was bothering him so badly, he wanted to eventually talk it out with them.

  The brown haired opened his eyes wider and he seemed to start coming up with million different reasons to make him stay, but all he said was simple and agreeing;

  'Whatever you want'

 Youngjae lowered his regard but still could see the other standing up and stepping out of the bathroom soundlessly. He did sound as if he didn't care. But it wasn't the case at all. Jaebum knew there was something wrong between the two of them and forcing something the other didn't want was the worst idea. The moment the elder was out of sight, Youngjae broke out crying. He did it soundlessly but the temptation to scream was so hard to resist. Lately, he had been feeling awful. He tended to cry at almost everything, like a little girl. That wasn't how he should have behaved.

 Youngjae preferred walking instead of driving. Although the taller told him a hundred times that he was exhausted and they shouldn't walk for such a long time, Youngjae was opposing. This way he still had a little bit of extra time thinking about what exactly he wanted to say to his parents. But it was actually a hopeless case. All he wanted was just being with Jaebum for a little more. He felt a little conscious of having such ugly thoughts when he was with him. Although he didn't really remember them talking about their relationship more detailed, he was acting around the elder as if they were boyfriends. But he wasn't that loyal to him. However, the only excuse he could come up with was that he wasn't one hundred percent sure about his feelings. 

  They both felt ridiculously awkward in the other's company. As if they were strangers, Jaebum was scared to ask, and Youngjae was scared to speak. They were marching next to each other, saying no words, just both staring ahead of themselves. 

  'What are you going to say to them?' Jaebum suddenly broke the silence being so sick of it.

 Youngjae formed his lips into a light smile. It was great to hear the elder's voice being curious about his plan. But eventually, he stopped smiling because he actually had no idea at all.

  'I don't know' he stopped abruptly and stuck his regard on the ground. 'Jaebum' he accosted the one who kept walking, not noticing the other wasn't beside him anymore. 'I think you should go back' the younger lifted his head and pointed to the opposite direction. He didn't know why he was acting like that with the other. As much as he wanted to be with him, he actually wanted to avoid his company too. He never meant to be the leader out of them, he just felt sorrow for Jaebum for meeting him at this period of his life. Although he had a huge part of why Youngjae's life was going to where it was.

 Jaebum stopped and slowly turned around. He was just noticing how far he had come without the younger. He walked back to him without even surprising and swallowed hard. He was aware of that if he starts forcing himself on the other by staying with him and accompany him and hold on until the end against his will, it won't make a single thing easier for Youngjae. And Jaebum knew when he had to stop and obey.

  'Are you sure that's what you want to do?' he asked as he stepped next to Youngjae and touched his arm.

 The younger wasn't hesitating. 'Yes' he nodded then added; 'I've already waited too much. You have no idea how it feels to me not having a good relationship with my parents. Moreover, I'm not even having one'

  'They were throwing awful things at your head. You don't deserve it' Jaebum spoke up a little bit because he did have some thoughts he needed tell the younger. It was his opinion and Youngjae had to know how it looked from the outside.

  'They don't deserve me locking myself away from them. I left without a word-'

  'Because she told you not to ever come back' Jaebum was now shouting. That woman made him feel angry and mad he would have been able to slap her.

  You’re disgusting.

  I wish I haven’t seen what I have.

  I’m still disappointed in you.

  I don’t consider you as my son anymore.

  Don’t ever dare to come back.

 Her words were still echoing in his head. It seemed more bothering for the elder because the other was too blind to see his mother was treating him nothing like she would have. And he thought everything could go back to how it was. 

  'Nothing is going to be the same, Youngjae' Jaebum's voice was so much more soothing and calm. He hated to state something that wasn't one hundred percent sure, but the younger had to admit that they weren't living in a dream.

  'But I need to talk to them. I can't live like this' he whispered as he passed by the elder's arm, heading to his home. 

 With a swift movement, Jaebum grabbed his upper arm and pulled his fragile body tightly on his. The younger hugged back but then a second later pushed himself away.

  'Call me afterward. Please, or just leave a message or something. Don't leave me unaware of how it went' Youngjae nodded then began to walk to their house's direction. He wanted to be over this whole "circus".

 Jaebum already felt so linked to Youngjae, it couldn't make it harder for him. And most importantly, he didn't want to loose him. However, he didn't know he was already losing him.

 As Youngjae arrived at the gate of their house, a sudden thought crossed his mind.

  What if they weren't even at home?

 Although they were always working, Saturday was an exceptional day even for them. He had just opened the gate when somebody grabbed his shoulder and it made him stop. For a second he thought Jaebum had come after him. But as he turned around and noticed someone much taller and more familiar, Youngjae couldn't resist leaning on his wide chest.

  'Hey, what is up with you?' Yugyeom laughed as he got rid of Youngjae's embrace.

  'I'm sorry. I never meant to treat you like I did yesterday night' he was apologizing. Youngjae didn't even notice, that Yugyeom was slightly smiling at him mumbling and talking nonsense. 'Why are you so happy?' he didn't understand his friend's joy. Not like he wanted him to be sad and depressed but his weirdness was freaking him out. 

  'I'm just glad you're back' he kept smiling. 'So, you have finally talked to your parents?' his voice abruptly changed to a more worried tone.

  'No' Youngjae answered without any emotion.

 Yugyeom was acting as if he wasn't in love with his best friend. As if everything was fine and nothing was bothering him.

  'But, are you seriously alright? You're acting strangely'

  'I'm good. Now it's you who needs more safety and caring'

  'That's why I want to talk to them" he pointed at the house referring to his parents. 'This whole situation is making me anxious'

  'I don't think it's the right time to meet them' Yugyeom scratched the back of his neck. 

  'What do you mean?' Youngjae narrowed his eyes. 'Why did you come here anyways?' he asked seeing his friend wouldn't answer his question.

 Yugyeom lowered his regard. Because there was one thing kept hidden inside him. He just wanted to finally get it off of his chest.

  'Why did you try to kill yourself?' The previously stuck smile swiftly froze off of his lips. He was too serious now and was already afraid of hearing the response or his reaction. The elder's eyes expanded. He clearly didn't want this to be known by him. Or else he would have started their conversation with it, wouldn't he?

  'That's why you came here? To tell my parents?' Youngjae was accusing him.

  'I thought maybe they could help you' Yugyeom's voice cracked. He sounded truly worried about his best friend.

  'It was just a misunderstanding' the elder was almost inaudible. He wasn't even looking at the blonde, but as soon as he went deeper among his thoughts, more and more unanswered questions popped up in his mind. 'How do you know it anyways?' But he didn't need to wait for the other to respond. Youngjae was smart, he realized immediately that there was only one person who was present at his "accident".

  'Do you and Jaebum share everything? He does tell you all of the things that happen to me, doesn't he?' Youngjae's voice was becoming shaky from one word to another. He felt like he was being betrayed by the two most important person in his life at the moment. It was ridiculous that he thought of them as traitors just because they were talking. Until then, he always thought they hated each other.

  'He is worried about you. And so am I. What the hell you were thinking? You truly have some mental issues there in your mind, haven't you? But you shouldn't punish the people around you. Because they care about you'

  'I know' Youngjae admitted. He didn't actually want to commit suicide. He was only curious. And now he regretted it so bad 'I'm sorry'

  'Stop apologizing here, you're annoying' the younger sighed with the most unreal smile on his lips. 'And promise me, you would never do this again'

 The suffer inside of him was tearing him apart. There wasn't much left of his real happiness. Not what he was showing but what he was feeling. The more Youngjae hurt himself, the more he was becoming weaker as well. It was like an invisible string that held them together. But Yugyeom felt like it was about to split.

 Everything and everyone was falling apart around Youngjae. But he didn't really realize that. He still had some immense problems to deal with. Although he didn't want to cause anything bad to anyone, it had just happened. He was human as well. And for all human beings, in the first place, there were themselves.

  'Are you still going in there?' the taller nodded to the door's direction. He wasn't too optimistic about his parents' welcome toward their son. He just wanted to protect Youngjae, in case something happens to him. But it was cruel to suppose that his mother and father would hurt him. And that was why he didn't even want to mention it in front of the other. 

  'They must be so worried. And I need them as well' Youngjae placed his hand on the latch, he was ready to come in.

 But Yugyeom could always come up with something to waste his time.

  'What about Jaebum? Weren't you happy being only with him?'

 For someone, who wasn't aware of the details, it was the most casual question, but for Youngjae, that little jealousy and teasing in his voice was more audible. 

  'Please, Yugyeom. Don't even start this right now, right here' Youngjae was praying. He wasn't in the mood of regretting even the slightest little move he made since he was born.

 Yugyeom forced the same, exaggerated smile on his face and eventually told the elder to go and talk it out with his parents.

 Opening the front door was stressful and exhilarating at the same time. All of a sudden, everything he planned to say flew out of his mind. That typical smell of his home hit his nose and it seemed to be fatal.

  'Did you hear that?' his mother's husky voice was heard. 

 After a second, Youngjae could hear their careful steps. They must have believed he was a burglar or something. But he couldn't move. He was frozen at the front door and was waiting for his parents to come out and find him. And he still had no idea how to greet them. Or how they would greet him.

 'Eomma' Youngjae whispered as soon as he noticed his mother's old and wrinkly face. He hadn't realized before how hard-working his mother was and how much she had actually done for her family. She may wasn't the best but she loved her son. 'Appa' His father was following his wife closely. It was obvious who was the boss at home. The man was always next to the woman and supported her in every case. And because she loved their son, he loved him as well. 

  'Youngjae, you bastard' the mother yelled among tears and ran to his son. She hugged him close to her body in order to feel her son was more alive than ever. 'We were so scared. Youngjae, can you forgive me for what I said? I don't care who you have spent your time with or who you have been with. What matters is the present. It's over now. Just never ever leave like that again' she sobbed.

 Although it sounded nothing like his mom, Youngjae was happy to be with them again.

  'I won't' Youngjae stated above her shoulder, then looked at his father, who was watching them in silence with entwined arms on his chest. The boy let his mom go and stepped closer to his father. He could see he had something to say as well.

  'It wasn't the manliest decision of your life' he said without a muscle twitching on his face. Youngjae swallowed hard as he nodded in acceptance. 'But now that it's over, you don't need to be with men. You can now look for a woman in your life

  'Wait, what?'

Their behavior, the things they said, nothing was like them. 

  'We know you were experiencing. And now that you didn't stay with him, it's clear you are straight. Thank God' his mother was smiling with her face in the direction of the ceiling.

 And everything got a reason. Because they were misunderstanding him. Again.

  But screw it.

 Youngjae had no intention to go back to where they were before. It was depressing and exhausting. For now, lying was his only choice.

'Youngjae? Is that you?'

'It is me'

'Then tell me, how did it go? Were they okay? Are you okay?'

'I am'

'Don't tease me. Can you be a little more precise? Are you sure everything is fine?'

'Actually, nothing is fine. I think I have fallen'

'What? Did you hurt yourself? I told you not to go there. If they are the reason why-'

'Jaebum, I'll be alright, but I need some time'

'Youngjae, you sound like you've taken drugs. What the hell are you talking about? What exactly do you mean by that you've fallen?'

'I have fallen out of love'

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Oh my god... I have finished.

Okay, well, I know the ending isn't what you may have expected AT ALL, but to be honest, I couldn't decide between 2jae or yugjae. So the final decision was not to chose either. It may be cruel but I felt like if Youngjae stays with Jaebum, he may lose Yugyeom (that guy is strong but I'm sure he wouldn't be able to bear that jealousy). But he couldn't be with the youngest either because it wouldn't fit the story.

That is why he gave up on both. The "love" towards Jaebum was just a sparkle. It wasn't real.

But they did stay best friends with Yugyeom, it didn't change.

The chapter is almost twice as long as the few last ones because I thought you guys deserved it, as the final chapter.

Thank you all for subscribing and commenting, it was the best eight months of my stay here on AFF, you are all so kind and supportive. I wish I could continue the story, but I felt it a little bit exaggerated now, I had to finish it eventually. 

Thank you one more time for everything, and hopefully, I'll see you soon!

Have a lovely day!

GOODBYE