"Umma,I'm going down to clear the trash." Doojoon slipped on his slipper and exit his house.

At the same time you exit your front door. Both eyes met with each other. Both of you just head to the lift and you pressed the button. 

It's been 2 weeks since you've met him face to face or even talked to him since the incident and it was sure awkward meeting him.

Both of you enter the lift and it was just silenced. You wanted to say something but hesitate to do so.

"Where are you going at this late night?" he asked, without looking at you.

"To the mart. I wanted to eat ramen but I ran out of stock." 

"You could have taken some from my house. And a female going out at this timing is dangerous." 

"I did went to check at your house but it was out of stock too." 

Usually if you were to went out late at night you would dragged Doojoon to tag along. However since both of you were not talking to each other, you had no choice but to go alone.

*Ah that's right I ate the last packet of ramen yesterday* Doojoon thought to himself 

The lift reached the first floor and you were ready to go in separate direction from him.

"Wait at minute." Doojoon said to you and went to clear the trash first. Once done, he went towards you.

You looked at him in puzzled.

"What? You said you wanted to go to the mart. What are you waiting for?" he said and walked ahead of you.

The journey was silenced again. You were thinking of what to talk to him.

"I heard you applied for Seoul University." you tooked the courage to asked him.

"Umma must have told you." 

You nod your head and smiled awkwardly.

Silenced again.

"Why did you do that?"this time Doojoon tried to break the silence.

You looked at him confused.

"Why didn't you even try? Don't you want the best for your future?" Both of you stop walking.

"Doojoon ah you have to understand that I'm not the type to--"

"Not the type to study? I've heard that a million time from you Jaeah." he cut you off.

"You didn't even try and just give up on everything. Don't you pity yourself? If no, maybe think about your parents. You think your dad will be happy seeing you in this state? You used to be the brightest kid ever but you're acting like your entire life just ended." he seem to have said everything that had been bottled up in his mind.

"Yes. You're right! My entire life just ended the moment my parent left me! Even if I did well, who do I want to impress?! Other kids have their parents to brag too whenever they received good results, but me? I have no one. No mum or dad to say I did well or give me a hug when I want to! In middle school, when everyone brought their parents to school to introduce while holding hands, I don't even had a parent to hold hands with. Every teachers and friends. saw me as a rebel teenager with no parents or future. So you tell me who am I doing it for?!" you vent out your feelings after hearing him.

You were going to cry but you held it in, not wanting to be weak in front of him. You looked at the floor avoiding having eye contact with him.

"Me.You could do it for me." he said.

You looked up to his face however you don't know how to react to what he said.

"Am I nothing to you?" he added.

"Ani. That's not--"

"Am I just someone who mean nothing to you?" he looked at you with sadness in his eyes.

"Doojoon ah that's not what I mean. You are definitely important to me but--"

"But what? But never good enough to make an impact in your life?"

You were speechless not knowing what to response to him.

"You have me and my family but all you care about was yourself. For once, I hope that you will at least do something with me in mind, but I guess that never happen. I am just a guy that hide behind your shadow just like what our schoolmates always said.I guess there's never a space for me in your heart and mind."

His eyes looked sad and disappointed.

You looked at him capturing what he just said.

"I gotta go." Doojoon turned back around and head back home.

You stood at your position, looking as you saw Doojoon's back leaving you behind. Your heart ache seeing him moving further step by step. 

You woke up feeling hungry and miserable. You never even bought the ramen you intended to buy after the incident that happened last night. 

*Am I nothing to you* you recalled what Doojoon said last night.

Those words had been in your mind taunting your sleep. You felt bad remembering his sad and disappointed eyes from last night. Yes, you felt bad. but you're sure that he would feel as bad too.

You looked at your fridge for breakfast but there's nothing to eat. Usually you will go next door and eat with his family, but this morning you were reluctant to do so. 

You grabbed your wallet and decided to go to the mart to buy the ramen that you intended to buy yesterday.

You slipped on your footwear and opened the door.

You saw a plastic bag hanging on the doorknob.

"Who left it here?"

You checked the content of the bag.

Inside was a packet of ramen that you wanted to buy yesterday.

"Yah Song Jaeah, you're such a pabo." you scolded yourself.

It must have been Doojoon who left it behind. You felt extra bad after treating him like but he's always there for you.

Maybe he's right, all you ever care about was yourself. 

"Ugghh. What have you done Song Jaeah?" you asked yourself.