The Season of Giving

I was never really any good at getting gifts for people, and everyone understood that. I guess to be completely and totally honest, I never tried that hard to find that special something for someone, you know? It’s horrible, I know, but I just never wanted to put in that extra effort into gifts. They knew I cared, I showed it in a lot of other ways, so I never found the point of giving a really meaningful gift to show them that I did. The obligation to get a gift made it all seem so fake to me.

But a couple of years ago, I met someone that made me want to try.

Christmas #1

“I can’t believe they –”

“Excuse me miss?”

A voice and a tap on the shoulder made me turn around.

That was when I first saw her – Kwon Yuri.

Not too tall, but she was taller than me. Tanned skin, black hair, and a kind, nervous smile were the next few things I noticed. Then, it was the way she was dressed. It was kind of a mess, really. Regular old converse, grey sweats, and a plain dark blue hoodie made me think that she hadn’t really given much thought before she stepped outside. But what caught me off guard was the out-of-place Minnie Mouse Santa hat on the top of her head.

I had to admit, the whole get-up worked for her.

“Um, miss?”

I snapped out of my daze and put on a polite smile. Tiffany always told me I needed to smile more. “Ah, yes?”

The grin on her face grew and she held out a pink box in her hand. I raised a confused eyebrow at her. “I overheard what you just ordered, and uh, this is the last tiramisu cake they had. You can have it instead.”

She said all this with a smile as she gently placed the box in my hands. “W-wait,” I stuttered, “I can’t take this.”

I tried to hand it back to her, but she shook her head lightly. “I saw how disappointed you were. Please, just take it. Consider it my Christmas gift to you,” she told me, the ever-so-pleasant smile still on her face.

I couldn’t help but smile myself. It was my favorite cake, after all. And her smile was sort of infectious, I guess. “How could I accept this? We don’t even know each other.”

She held out a hand to shake this time. “Kwon Yuri.”

“Jung Jessica.”

The way she made me want to do something so out of the ordinary was so surreal.

And so, for her sake, whenever the season of giving came around I started to search for the perfect gift – the perfect way to show I care. It was really hard to do because she was practically the queen of gift giving. But I still tried for reasons I couldn’t explain.

I failed every single time.

Christmas #2

Our first Christmas together didn’t really count because we had known each other for a week. So, the next year, it was my first time spending the holidays with a significant other. I wasn’t sure how to go about getting a gift for her. I asked Tiffany for advice and she told me that handmade gifts could never go wrong.

Except if you’re me, of course.

It was supposed to be a mug, but it looked like nothing one. It looked more like…well it looked like, nothing really. I wasn’t even going to give the darned thing to her, but she found it wrapped sitting on top of my desk on the day we exchanged gifts. Her smile faltered a little when she opened it. Nonetheless, Yuri, being the kind-hearted soul she is, hugged me and told me she loved it.

“I’ve never received anything like it before.”

Christmas #3

They always say that the third time is the charm.

Well, I’m here to tell you that it’s not.

I asked Sooyoung to tell me what a good gift would be, and she told me that a well cooked meal was always a good idea. Figures that she would suggest food as a gift, but I had to admit that I wasn’t a bad idea.

Except for the fact that I can’t cook for the life of me.

This small but important fact slipped my mind, and I proceeded to make possibly the worst Christmas feast one could ever set their eyes on. I honestly don’t know what I was thinking. Perhaps I thought that some sort of Christmas miracle would happen or something. It’s too bad my life isn’t a televised Christmas special, otherwise that probably would’ve worked.

But, even so, Yuri sat there and ate every last piece.

“No one has ever cooked this much for me before.”

Christmas #4

This time I asked the most sensible person I knew for advice.

“She likes Mickey Mouse, right? Just get her something to do with that.”

It was perfect.

Until it wasn’t.

I failed to recognize the millions of other Mickey Mouse merchandise she already owned.

And despite the generic gift, she still smiled at me and hugged me and told me that she loved it.

“This Mickey is special because it came from you.”

I just couldn’t find a good gift. What was the definition of a good gift anyway? I wasn’t sure, but I knew that Kwon Yuri was the best at getting them, and I couldn’t help but feel inferior to her every single time. I didn’t want her to think that I didn’t care as much as she did, or that I didn’t love her as much.

I was being extremely insecure, but I couldn’t help it when I had someone so great showering me with all these amazing gifts.

Our fifth Christmas together was in a week, and I was still stuck.

But then she showed up at my door, and instead of that smile I was so used to, she had a frown on her face.

“Sica,” she said with a frown, “I’ve been talking to some of our friends and…”

She walked in and plopped down onto the couch.

“And what?” I asked her.

She pouted and I rolled my eyes at her. “They might’ve mentioned something about you thinking you never get me good gifts.”

I sat down next to her. “Well, it’s true, isn’t it?”

There was still a frown on her face. “Why in the world would you think that?”

I gaped at her in shock. “You seriously want me to explain why my previous presents were horrible?”

Yuri laughed and reached out to grab both of my hands. “Your gifts were not horrible, and I mean that. Look, Sica – wait, before I explain,” she stopped to lean forward and give me a kiss. We both pulled away grinning before she continued. “You remember our first Christmas together? We met two weeks before that, so we didn’t get each other anything special, but we did get together that holiday season, didn’t we? I lured you under the mistletoe and we shared our first kiss. That was an amazing Christmas, Sica.”

“But –”

“Wait, I’m not done yet. Then there was our second Christmas, and you made me a mug. Granted, it didn’t really look much like one and you can’t really pour liquids in it…” I pulled my hands away and hit her on the shoulder. She only laughed and grabbed my hands again before giving me another kiss. “But, I still have it sitting proudly on my desk because no one’s ever given me a handmade gift before, Sica. Plus, it’s kind of nice because at first glance everyone will know that it’s from you.”

I moved to hit her again, but she held onto my hand tightly and continued to talk.

“Then there was our third Christmas. I’m usually the one doing the cooking for everyone, so even if it wasn’t exactly, um, edible, the gesture was probably the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.”

I could only smile at this point.

“And last Christmas, well, I could tell you were a bit upset that I had a million other Mickey Mouse stuffed toys, but I’ll tell you again what I told you last year. That one was different because it came from you.

I will love whatever you get me, Sica because I can always see the effort you put behind it. You see, that’s the secret about gifts. It’s not about what the actual gift is, it’s about the persons’ intentions behind it. I don’t know how many times I’ll have to tell you that for you to believe it, but I’ll tell you the same thing every year if I have to.”

I laughed and shook my head at the girl. She was honestly too cheesy for her own good sometimes.

It was a good thing I liked it so much.

“Okay, I get it. You make a good point, but…”

Yuri let out a deep sigh. “Can’t you just agree with me and that’ll be over with?” I only shook my head and moved to lean against her, feeling her arms wrap around my waist and her head lean against mine. “Then what else is there?”

“I know you love whatever I get you, because you’re you and have this weird heart-of-gold thing in you. But I just…I want to get you something that’ll really surprise you, you know?”

“Well, to be fair, that meal you gave me two years ago really surprised me…”

“Oh, be quiet.”

“The very fact that you want to try so hard for me makes all the difference,” she told me as she ran her fingers through my hair. I leaned further into her and closed my eyes, letting myself relax. “Just stay with me, Sica,” she whispered, “That’s all I ever really want from you.”

I smiled. “You know what my favorite part of Christmas is?”

“What?”

“You get extra cheesy.”