"The problem is he loves her more than he would ever show.

He keeps everything for himself.

That's his mistake."

"Do you really want to know?" Jung Ah sighed and looked straight to Sehun's eyes. She lost in his eyes and found nothing but darkness.

"Yes because I've been wondering what I am in your eyes. What we have been doing all these days, months?" He was confused, he was jealous, and his feeling was screwed up. Five shots of vodka but he still held her in his arm, waiting or her answer.

"I don't know, Sehun. What have we been doing? I have no idea. We're just having fun." Jung Ah looked away. She was confused because Sehun asked something she was not sure about.

They are not a couple because they never made it official, but they were too close to be called just friends. Words I love you? They never said it in serious and romantic way. Just friends? Well, do friends sleep together many times already? Share clothes, meals and drinks?

"Why are so clear about that Kim Jongin but not about me?" Sehun raised his eyebrow, feeling more frustrated, he ruffled his hair and sighed.

"Alright. Whatever. You don't have to answer me." He then walked away, leaving the room, leaving Jung Ah dumbfounded.

--flashback--

"Hey, you've been drinking this way too much." Chanyeol approached Sehun who was enjoying hard liquor alone in the bar, shot after shot.

"So what?" Sehun raised his eyebrow and laughed, a bitter laugh.

"What happen with you man?" Chanyeol shooked his head and joined Sehun taking the Absolute Vodka. He does not really fond of vodka, it was just a courtesy since he was having a man to man talk. He prefers something smooth, like wine. But Sehun, he is a heavy drinker, vodka, whisky, anything. Offer him a drink and he would gladly join you.

"Just need some refreshment." Sehun chuckled and lighted up his cigarette. Left hand was holding rocks glass while the right hand was holding marlboro ice blast. Typical Oh Sehun.

"Marlboro?" Chanyeol lighted up his own cig, raising his eyebrow.

"Yeah, trying something new. I left my Lucky Strike back in Seoul."

They just stayed silent until Chanyeol decided to talk first.

"Life is kinda hard lately, isn't it?" He understood that Sehun would never spill out his problem but he still tried anyway.

"Complicated, yes. Sometimes I can't really understand people. I don't know how to say it. It's just, you know, many things happened without you expected." Sehun had never been good with words, and he still does.

"I know. But life goes on, if something belongs to you, it will come back to you." Chanyeol stated.

"Amen." Sehun laughed and finished his vodka. He knew Jung Ah belongs to no one. That scared him a lot. He was afraid, one day he would wake up without her, without his sunshine.

---

It was two in the morning. Jung Ah could not sleep, she was thinking about Sehun, obviously. No, she was not worried about him, she was just confused. She was never been in a relationship because she does not like the idea of being tied to someone. She was afraid of relationship label. Then she was wondering, are they friends in benefit or something more than that?

Suddenly her phone vibrated. Well it had been vibrating a lot but she just realised it then. 2 missed calls, 3 messages.

'Sehun's with me. He's drunk. Where are you?'

'Jung Ah? What happened with you and him?

'I guess you're already sleeping. Gnight!'

All those messages were coming from Luhan but Jung Ah was not in mood to reply.

One more time her phone vibrated.

'Jung Ah? You haven't sleep, have you?' It was from Hyunseung.

Jung Ah smiled a bit and typed something on her phone.

"Beer?" Hyunseung offered Jung Ah the can he was holding.

"Sure. Thanks." They were outside a bar. Sitting on a bench, starring at people who went home after wasting their night inside.

"How are you? I heard you're in SNU now." Hyunseung drank from his carlsberg bottle and looked at her.

"Just fine. Yeah, majoring in fashion design. How about you?"

"Great. Singapore. Friends. College. Couldn't ask for more."

"Are you happy now? With your life, with Sehun?" Hyunseung suddenly asked Jung Ah. He noticed that she is not as cheerful as the Jung Ah he met years before.

"With Sehun? You know, we are not a couple. We're just... I don't know." Jung Ah shrugged, she did not like people keep mentioning Sehun whenever they are talking about her well-being.

"I know. You have never liked being in a relationship. I was just asking in case Sehun changed your mind." Hyunseung said blatantly.

"Yeah, you know me. I'm not ready and I thought Sehun too, until he asked me what we have been doing."

"You just want to have fun, don't you?"

"Honestly, it's not the only thing. No. M