Donghae

                I had to leave him in the car with the body for a few minutes. I thought it would be a good idea to cover our tracks, and by that I meant the blood stains. I was watching the ground as I walked at a fast pace, and I noticed that we had left a trail of blood all the way to the car. As I went along, I would stoop down and step on the snow until it sunk down and then I would cover it up with more snow so that the red wasn’t visible. I had to stop and do that a few times before I got to the main source. I wasn’t sure how I was going to do it, but I figured I could just do what I had been doing. Cover up the blood with more snow and hope it all melts before anyone happens to discover it. Although I didn’t think anyone would come this far into the woods in the middle of winter, you could never be too cautious.

                There was no visible trace of blood left after I was finished. I was quite proud of my work, if you could be proud over such a thing. If we really did get caught, I would be labeled as a tool in the murder, or assisted manslaughter, I’m not really sure what they call it, but I knew that I wouldn’t get off scot free. No one ever did when something like this happened.

                I got back to the car as fast as I could. I was worried for him, having to be all alone in the car with a dead body in the back. It couldn’t have been the most pleasant couple of minutes ever. I looked into the window of the car door and saw that he was just staring ahead, he didn’t even notice me. It was like before, when I first reached him, so I pulled on the handle, but the door didn’t open. I tapped my knuckles against the glass beside his face and he turned to look at me, startled. He looked as if he had seen a ghost just now.

                “The door’s locked.” I said to him. He unlocked the doors and I went around to get into the driver’s seat. I looked at him with worry. “How are you doing?” I asked. I laid my hand on his thigh, and rubbed it in soothing circles, just how he liked it whenever he was stressed. It seemed to do the job too, because his shoulders dropped a little.

                “Not so good, ya know. But what can I expect after something like this? It’s just so… unbelievable. I can’t even understand how we’re being so calm right now… I mean, that’s a – a dead…” His eyes wandered to the back of the car but then darted back and found mine.

                “I understand. I may not know everything, but I can understand you, because I know you.” I brought my lips close and tried to smile for him but it didn’t go all the way. “You know,” I looked out the window at the trees, “we’re not really calm. Nobody could be calm at a time like this, not deep down. People just handle these things differently, and besides, we don’t have time to freak out right now. Not if we want to get through this. That’s why we’re going to get this done and we’re going to be fine. After that, we’ll have all the time in the world to freak out and tear ourselves away, but when that time comes, I’ll be there with you, so we can do it together. That’s important, it’s so important right now.”

                His hand found mine and he squeezed it tightly. I turned my head to look at him and he was crying. There were several tears escaping from his eyes and he was just looking forward and nodding his head while he clutched my hand in his.