here i am trying to dress up. My goal is to look fierce..because i dont wanna be either cute or y but FIERCE. I am actually really nervous right now. I don't know what to wear and i do not know what to say. What are gonna talk about.

I can't start acting all mean and cold, but it just...ugh! Seeing them again just makes me excited but angry at the same time. Kris just does not get me. He think i am being paranoid but... what if it tirns out bad? What if insult them? What if we decide not to see each other? What of it turns akward? What if..  ???

All this questions started burning in my mind. At least i have kris so he can help me... i think he is more kind than me.. but just a little bit..wait...why am i talking with myself..??? Ughh i really need more friends. I need my friends back.

My real friends back.

"Are you still in your closet?" Kris comes in with a bag of chips.

"I don't know what to wear and that is killing me..what if they come all nice and dress up. Can you help me?" I asked 

"That is what is bothering you?? I think of what will you say it is more important that worrying about insignificant stuff like that" he layed down on the bed eating the chips.

"Eww you are gonna get the sheets dirty, i am worried about that too. It is just that i want this to be perfect. Don't you think that a girl worrying about that is stupid??!" I gave him a mean look.

"Stop asking questions...i dont like it.."he covered himself with the sheets.

"Whatever" i lef the room and pulled out my phone, i started to search in my contacts for Luhan. "Here it is" gonna text him for advice.

___ugly Luhan gay punk___

Sica: hey luhan can you help me? Are you still in china?

Luhan: yeah why? Dont tell me you are bored of kris and now you want some od lulu?

Sica: eww no (i explained to him the whole story)

Luhan: so you are asking me for 2 things... what to wear and what to say?

Sica: yes.

Luhan: this may sound a little cursi..

Sica:go for it.

Luhan: ok..first of all.. in this situation the less you care is about what you will wear. Why is that important? Yeah maybe cause you have not seen them for a year..but i think being simple is the best combo here. Jeans and a simple shirt. Just as how you hanged oit when you were close and all that..

Second, what are you gonna say? Nothing else but the truth. Sincerity will be the best thing here. Because what you want is to bring back the trust and all of that with your friends right. You dont need to be all defensive and act cold and all that. But dont let yourself so easy to them. You need to have confidence.

And ... well. It is your friends you are dealing with.. you know them more than anyone.. you should know how to deal with this situation. But lastly dont ruin this. Dont ruin the only chance to bring back your friends. Accept and asume what they say and you tell them your feelings too. Dont ruin the opportunity of being even more happy... that's all.

Sica: wow luhan.. i.. thank you... but if you know all this.. why have you and kris not met with the other boys?.

Luhan: ah ha ha that? That is because kris and i are coward and even more important..we do not deserve to see them again.

Peace out.

Sica: wait!!!

He stopped answering from here.

"Thanks luhan" i said to myself.

The day went slow.. now it is 4.20pm.. time to get ready. I go with all my confidence back to my room and get ready.

"Ohh you are getting ready now? I am alredy dressed up.  Good luck" he kissed mu forehead and patted my head.

"Stop teasing me!!" I pull him out of the room. "Time to get ready!"

I put on a black with long sleeves shirt. With tight jeans and black higheels. I put on light make up. And finaly my favorite B&E glasses.

i got all done at 5.30pm.

"TIME TO LEAVE!!" I exclaimed.

"Let's go. Are you ready?" Kris said.

"Hella ready".

---------------------------------------

We arrived exactly at 5.50pm. It was a small but friendly like restaurant. With walls and floor of wood. The decoration is stunning just like a really expensive tree house.

We go in. I found myself surprised nobody was there but them. Yoona notices me and starts waving so i go there.

"Let's go kris" i gulped.

We are now standing in front of there. When that cute but mother kind of voice says.

"Jessica ! It has been a long time. Come here. Give me a hug!" Sunny says and hugs sica.

"Hi hi sunny" i say.

"Oh my.. your BF kris is so tall. Who would have thought. Congratulations!" Sunny says.

"Thanks.." kris says.

"Sunny calm down we have a lot to say to jessica " hyo says. "Please sit down.

"Jessica. Thank you for coming." Yoona smiles. "You too kris".

"No problem" we both sit in our respective chairs.

"Jessica.. i am sorry" hyo says "i felt pressured by work and all that, that i forgott about my friend."

"Me too honey" sunny says. While doing her aegyo things 

"Yoona told me the story..so i understand" i said to them.

"Sorry to interrupt but what kind of punishment will SM give you if you took jessica's side" kris asks.

"He told us he could kicked us out or he will just find a way to get rid of traitors like us." Yoona answers.

"You know we did not want that! Sica we know we did wrong for ignoring and trash talk about you but please understand our situation too. If we all took your side. SM will just forgett about all SNSD and focused on TTS. " sunny says.

I sighed.

"Well that is funny. That stupid company huh? SM really ... what is he a teenage girl? Theathening you guys like that" kris laughed.

"Sica please five us another chance. Let's be friends again. We cant hang out so publicly but we will find a way to just do it" hyo pleaded.

"You know....no.. did you guys know how much i missed you?" Without knowing i started to cry.

"Can we all hug?" Yoona asks.

"Sure" we all smiled and gave a group hug. 

"Aww that is cute" kris said. "But answer me this. From things i have heard about jessica..wasn't yuri her BFF? Or something like that?"

"Ah that" sunny sighed.

"That hurted me"  i said and looked down.

"Guess... those were all lies. We were all surprised too. She claimed to be ylur friend...but when she found out the group could get in trouble bacause of you...she just totaly forgott you..." hyo said.

" yuri doesn't deserve your forgiveness." Sunny said.

"Us 3 were worried about you alot. We are not kidding! We tried speaking with you or texting but SM is monitoring our phones..."yoona sighed.

"But let's not talk anymore about that." Sunny says.

"Yeah.. better tell us. How did you guys started to date?" Hyo asks.

"Ahh that" kris and i looked at each other.

"It is a long story...well short" kris says.

"Please tell us" yoona says and smiles.

I can't say no to these faces. "Well...i'll give you a quick summary of that". I said.

---to be continued--