“Jimin!” Sakura cheered as I answered my phone.

“What’s up, sweetheart?” I smiled as I held the phone in between my ear and shoulder, working on cleaning up for the day.

“Wanna get drunk tonight?” She asked, sounding sneaky.

“Um…” I checked my watch. “Yeah, but let’s eat first. You wanna come over and eat dinner?”

“Are you even gonna be up for getting drunk afterwards? You kind of seem like a grandpa.” She laughed. “But I’ll come over. I’ll bring pizza, how does that sound?”

“Sounds amazing.” I grinned. “See you in half an hour, then?”

“See you!”

I made my way home quickly, showering and changing into joggers and a henley. I snuggled with Jack on my bed, kissing his shaggy head.

“Your favorite lady’s coming over today. Aren’t you excited?” I asked, ruffling his fur. He whined in protest, nudging at my face with his nose.

The doorbell rang and both of us sprung up, eager to answer it. I looked forward to Sakura coming over. I liked her, a lot. I didn’t know how else I felt about her, but I certainly wouldn’t say no to another sleepover.

I opened the door with a wide grin spreading across my face. She stood there with a pizza, her curly hair down and out around her shoulders. It was wild, springing in every direction. I absolutely adored it.

“Hey.” She smiled, quirking her nose up at me. I leaned down to give her a quick kiss, the pizza box bumping against my chest.

“Hi.” I said softly, entangling my fingers in her curls. “I love your hair today.”

“Do you?” Her thick eyebrows lifted in surprise.

“Yeah, it’s gorgeous.” I whispered, pulling her in for another kiss. I felt her smile underneath my kiss, warm heat rushing to her cheeks as my hands slid down to cup her face. As I pulled away, I whispered in her ear, “You’re gorgeous.”

“Why, thank you.” She said, affecting a British accent. “I try my best.”

I laughed and took the pizza from her, ushering her inside.

“You cleaned in here.” Sakura commented, sitting on the couch while I set the pizza on the table.

“Ah, a little.” I sat down next to her, slinging an arm around her shoulders. “I’m supposed to babysit for my sister’s kids tomorrow. They make a huge mess, so I try to clean up a little before they come.”

“You like kids?” She asked, nestling into me. I caught a whiff of her Daisy perfume.

“I never really interacted with them much until my nieces were born.” I told her, playing with her hair. “I think I just like children related to me.”

“You wanna have kids?” Sakura plopped her legs into my lap and I ran a hand over her fishnet tights, observing the way they disappeared underneath her little floral skirt.

“Yeah, someday.” I leaned my head back against the couch lazily. “If I ever get married.”

“Married, huh.” Sakura said, a dark note in her tone.

“What? You don’t like marriage?” I looked down at her, noticing a little freckle right next to her nose ring.

“How would you propose to someone, Jimin?” She asked abruptly, looking up at me. I pondered the question for a moment, plucking absentmindedly at her tights.

“I’m not sure. But my sister used to tell me the story of our parents’ proposal when I was young. It’s one of the few things I know about them. My dad proposed to my mom so many times and she always said ‘No, not yet.’ He started to get discouraged, but he never left her. He loved her too much and wanted to win her over one day. So he started asking why she rejected him and each time she came up with a new answer. He’d work on flaw after flaw until one day he said, ‘I’m not asking you again. I’ll wait until you’re ready to marry me. Until then, I’ll just enjoy the time we have.’”

“Your dad didn’t get fed up?” Sakura asked in wonder. “I would have left her after she rejected me the first time.”

“You wouldn’t.” I shook my head. “You never left Jin until now after all these years.”

She was quiet for a long while. I started to worry I had offended her and opened my mouth to apologize, but before I could, she asked me a quiet question.

“What happened then? How’d your parents get engaged?”

I smiled, loving this part of the story. “One day, my dad was in the kitchen, cooking dinner for my mom. She had come over for a night of dancing, but he’d wanted to surprise her with a meal first. After they were done eating, she pulled out a small little wooden box. She told my dad to close his eyes and opened the box, then placed whatever was in it in his hands. When he opened it, he was holding a very simple ring. Just a plain gold ring. He stared up at her in confusion and she smiled and said, ‘That was my grandfather’s. He gave it to me and told me when I was ready, I should give it to the man I want to marry.’ He just sat there staring at her until she laughed and took his hand and asked ‘Will you marry me?’ My sister said my dad always swore when he told this part of the story, because my mom would . But he burst out crying, so happy that my mom wanted to marry him. He thought she’d never say yes to him, but she ended up proposing. I guess it’s kind of a lame story if they’re not your parents, but I always thought it was kind of sweet.”

“Your dad certainly had a lot of perseverance.” Sakura took my hand, playing with my fingers. She studied my ring finger for a while.

“Would you marry Jin if he asked you?” I thought about the engagement ring I had hidden underneath my bathroom sink. It was my mother’s, and once I’d planned on giving it to Maya.

“I don’t know.” She replied wistfully. “I really don’t know.”

Sakura’s POV

The doorbell rang and Jimin jumped up, striding over to answer it. He froze halfway to the door when we both heard the distinct call of a child’s voice.

“Uncle Jimin!”

“, , !” He hissed under his breath, hopping up and down. “I can’t believe I forgot.”

“Forgot what?” I stared at him as he made his way to the front door, hopping and cursing under his breath the whole time. He looked ridiculous and adorable.

Jimin threw me an apologetic glance. “I mixed up the dates for babysitting. Good thing we didn’t go out ye.t” He added ruefully.

“What? Your sister’s here?” I glanced down at my clothes. This was clearly a trashy night-out at the club outfit. I was wearing fishnets, for Pete’s sake. She’d probably think the worst of me, especially if she was a mom. My mom certainly thought the worst of my outfits.

Jimin raked his gaze over my body, studying me for any imperfections. “You look beautiful.” He said simply. A few butterflies fluttered in my stomach at his words. “You don’t need to worry. Besides, my sister will probably just be happy a girl’s here.” He winked at me.

“Jimin! We’re here!” His sister rang the doorbell again.

“Uncle Jimin! Uncle Jimin!” A chorus of kids called his name. How many nieces and nephews did he have again?

“Coming!” He shouted, shooting me a smile before unlatching the door.

I watched from my seat at the table as two little girls launched themselves at him, screaming his name and assaulting his face with kisses.

“Uncle Jimin! Uncle Jimin, we missed you!”

“I missed you ladybugs, too!” Jimin grinned, squeezing them tightly.

“Girls, let Uncle Jimin breathe.” A woman reprimanded them. So this was Jimin’s sister, huh? She had her gorgeous black hair piled in an intricate bun on top of her head. She adjusted the baby on her hip before offering her cheek to Jimin for a kiss.

“Hi, baby brother.” She smiled at him; I suddenly could see the family resemblance. They both had blindingly bright smiles.

“Hi.” Jimin set the girls down and took the baby from her. “How’s baby James today?” He nuzzled his nose against the baby’s stomach, making James gurgle with laughter.

I sat there alone on the couch, momentarily forgotten in the midst of the hubbub. I didn’t mind; my heart was slowly melting at the sight of Jimin with his family. He looked so happy and energetic. The kids were cute as well.

Jack came sniffing into the room, growling when he saw the girls. They both screamed and clung to each other, terrified.

“Oh, .” I heard Jimin mumble. “Sakura, can you put him in my bedroom? He’s terrible with these children. Grumpy old dog.”

“Sure.” I said quietly as four sets of eyes swiveled towards me. The only one uninterested in my presence was baby James. He was too busy gnawing on his fingers and drooling to pay attention to me.

I quickly escorted Jack into Jimin’s bedroom, my cheeks on fire. I wished I could hang out in there with him as I heard several whispers of “Who’s that? Who’s that lady, Uncle Jimin?” and “Jimin, I didn’t know you had company. I like her fishnets.”

“Yeah, aren’t they pretty?” I could hear the smile in his voice. “They show off her beautiful thighs.”

“You guys are sleeping together, aren’t you?” She chuckled, trying to keep her words soft, but immediately her daughters asked,

“Mommy, what does that mean? Uncle Jimin takes a nap with that lady?”

“Oh my god.” I heard Jimin sigh, exasperated. “Melissa, can you just…”

I briefly considered faking sick and hiding in Jimin’s bed until they went home, but my pride got the better of me.

I stepped outside his bedroom door, face dark red in embarrassment, and presented myself to the curious eyes of Jimin’s family.

“Hi.” I gave a small wave, biting my bottom lip anxiously. “I’m Sakura.”

“Nice to meet you, Sakura.” Jimin’s sister offered her hand to me. “I’m Melissa, Jimin’s older sister.”

I shook her hand, using my society girl manners. For some inexplicable reason, I wanted to impress her.

“These are my daughters, Arielle and Celeste.” She pointed at one and then the other. “They’re twins.” She added, seeing my look of confusion. “And then this one right here,” She stepped over to Jimin, taking the baby from him. “Is my youngest, James.”

“It’s very nice to meet you all.” I smiled down at the little girls. They hid shyly behind Jimin’s legs.

“Are you Jimin’s girlfriend?” Melissa asked me, smiling even while being blunt.

“Melissa!” Jimin elbowed her in the side. “Stop interrogating her.”

“Yeah.” I smiled back at her. “I’m Jimin’s girlfriend.”

Jimin glanced up at me, so surprised, before a warm smile spread across his face.

“Uncle Jimin has a girlfriend?” Arielle asked, peeking at me from behind Jimin’s legs.

“You’re pretty.” Celeste whispered, hiding her face again as soon as she said it.

“Thanks.” I grinned down at them.

“Are you gonna play with us?” Arielle asked shyly, poking her head between Jimin’s legs.

“You don’t have to stay, Sakura.” Jimin said quietly, meeting my eyes.

“I’d like to.” I smiled at him. “It’ll be fun, right?”

It wasn’t fun.

By the time Melissa came to pick up the kids, Jimin and the twins were passed out on the couch and I was struggling to get the baby’s spit up out of my skirt. The apartment was a wreck and I had marker on my face. The girls had drawn freckles on me and a moustache on Jimin. James, at least, cooed happily in his little bouncy chair.

A quiet knock at the door distracted me from my task. I pushed a few unruly strands of hair back, having long since pulled it into a bun. My curls were not safe around children, I’d learned fairly quickly. The baby had tried to eat it and the twins had tried to brush it, God forbid. Jimin had ripped the brush out of Arielle’s hands when he noticed what she was doing, making her cry from surprise and hurt feelings. The only way he could get her to stop was to give her a cupcake, and then Celeste had to have one, too. And then they were all hyped up on sugar while the baby was screaming to be fed and I decided right then and there that I would never have children.

I decided that I had made myself as presentable as possible and quietly opened the door to see Melissa smiling back at me.

“Hi, Sakura.” She greeted me warmly. I stepped back to let her in and led her to the little sleeping family.

“They’re all tuckered out.” I laughed, picking up the baby. “Except this one right here.”

“Oh, hello my handsome little boy.” Melissa cooed, taking James from me and planting a kiss on his chubby cheek. “How were the girls?”

“They were good. Very energetic.” I smiled, choosing not to mention that they made me want to get my tubes tied.

“Good.” Melissa beamed. “So, how long have you and Jimin been dating?”

Oh, great. Time for the inquisition. I wished Jimin were awake so he could save me from this.

“Um…not that long.” I said evasively. “We’re still getting to know each other.”

“Yeah? How did you two meet?” She asked, bending down to place James in his carseat.

“At his bakery. He gave me a free slice of cake.” I smiled, remembering. “He’s such a sweetheart.”

“He is.” Melissa agreed, straightening up. “He’s a nice boy. Doesn’t deserve to be taken advantage of.” She added pointedly, looking over at me.

“No, he doesn’t.” I nodded, feeling horribly guilty. I was taking advantage of Jimin; he was my little life raft amidst my sea of love for Jin. I was using him to keep from drowning in my feelings and going back to Jin.

“Well, I hope you two work out, Sakura. You seem nice. Nicer than his last girlfriend, at least.” She went over to the couch and shook Jimin awake.

“Hmm?” He blinked, trying to focus his eyes on her. “Mel, you’re here? The twins are…here.” He gestured to the couch, half-asleep. “They’re good. Had some cupcakes.”

“Jimin! I told you not to feed them sugar!” Melissa scolded, scooping up Arielle into her arms. She stirred in her sleep, but Melissa patted her back and she nestled against her neck.

“They were crying and wouldn’t stop.” He yawned, standing up. He picked up Celeste and waved to me, picking up the carseat with James in it. “I’ll be right back, Sakura.”

“Okay.” I waved at the pair of them and went into the bedroom to snuggle with Jack.

Jack leapt up onto me as soon as I opened the door, as eager for kisses as ever.

“Hi, baby.” I crooned, petting his shaggy fur. “Oh, aren’t you the cutest?”

I laid down on Jimin’s bed and snuggled under his blankets, feeling very sleepy all of a sudden. Jack hopped up next to him and rested his head on his paws, staring at me with his pretty blue eyes.

The front door clicked and I heard Jimin’s footsteps before he came and leaned against the doorframe with his arms crossed, smiling down at us.

“Well, isn’t this such a domestic scene?” He laughed, kicking off his boots.

“I’m sleepy.” I yawned, watching him as he walked over to his closet, pulling down a faded red and black flannel.

“Change into this.” Jimin ordered, tossing it to me. I caught it, staring at him warily as he came over and laid down in bed next to me. He smelled good, like cologne and babies and cake. I had a fleeting thought that they could bottle his scent and sell it. I would buy it.

“Why?” I nuzzled my nose into Jack’s fur as Jimin wrapped his arms around me. His body felt warm against my back. I closed my eyes, briefly picturing Jin lying next to me until Jimin kissed my bun, giggling as my curls tickled his nose.

“Cause you’re sleeping here tonight.”

“Oh, am I?” I asked, turning towards him. Our noses collided and he kissed me, a soft little sweet kiss.

“Yeah.” Jimin whispered, holding my hips in his hands. His finger traced the outline of my little rose tattoo; the gesture felt intimate, somehow. Only he and Jin knew I had it. “You are.”

“Thanks for asking.” I said wryly. “What if I had plans tonight?”

“You did.” Jimin chuckled. “With me. Remember? We’re going to get drunk.”

“Oh, yeah.” I traced the outline of his marker moustache with my index finger. His skin felt scratchy under my touch. “You need to shave.”

“Ah, my 5 o’clock shadow has come in.” He ran a hand over his face. “You’ve got some peculiar freckles on your face. You might want to visit your dermatologist.”

I pecked his cheek before pushing off of him and scooting off the bed, snatching up his shirt.

“Leave the fishnets on.” Jimin called after me as I made my way towards the bathroom. I stuck up my middle finger, smirking back at him before I shut the door.

Once in the bathroom, I stripped down to my underwear, choosing to leave the fishnets on. Why not, right? I slid my arm into the sleeve of Jimin’s soft red flannel, sniffing the collar for traces of his scent.

I buttoned it up, fingers working at the stubborn little tan buttons. Curls fell into my face, blocking my view as I wondered how I’d ended up in this situation. I finished dressing and stared into the mirror, surveying myself. Black dots sprinkled across my nose and cheeks like sunspots, messy bun quickly falling apart from the trauma of changing clothes, sleepy brown eyes peeking out of a pale face.

“What are you doing, Sakura?” I whispered, reaching out to touch my reflection. “How can you sleep with another man after Jin proposed to you?”

I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t pictured being a mom while babysitting Jimin’s nieces and nephew tonight. What it would be like to hold mine and Jin’s baby, nestled in a cozy little apartment with books scattered all over the place. Jin playing with our oldest daughter while I changed the baby’s diaper. Tucking them up in bed and then sneaking off into our bedroom to make love.

“No, it wouldn’t be like that.” I shook my head, slipping out of my daydream. I imagined another scene, of me alone with one child in a large, pristine house while Jin worked late. Taming my daughter’s wild curls and stuffing her into a stiflingly frilly dress for the endless society dinners we’d have to drag her to. Only ever being able to have one child because of the immense workload. Endless streams of nannies in and out of the house until she was a teenager, wild and rebellious like I had been.

I’d been unlucky to fall in love with Jin. If he’d just been willing to leave that life with me, then maybe we could work out. But if we were together, he would always remain the dutiful son and husband and we would both be miserable, no matter how much we loved each other.

“Sakura!” Jimin shouted from his bedroom. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Washing my face!” I called back, reeling myself back in from those unhappy thoughts. I splashed water on my face and stole some of Jimin’s facewash, eager to remove the marker.

He didn’t respond, apparently satisfied with my answer.

I turned back to the mirror, water dripping from my now clean skin. I pressed my face into Jimin’s hand towel, smelling his scent on everything.

“Jimin is a nice boy.” I whispered. “Try to fall out of love with Jin.”

I stepped out of the bathroom, shutting the light off with a click. Jimin looked up as I walked in, a smile spreading across his face. He'd somehow managed to remove his marker moustache.

“You’re hot.” He said, resting his chin on Jack, his eyes following me as I made my way over to the bed.

He sat up and scooted over to the edge of the bed, taking my hands in his. He interlaced our fingers, tugging me down for a kiss. I smiled against his kiss, deciding to sit in his lap. He let go of my hands and pulled the tie out of my hair, breaking the kiss and watching as my curls spilled over my shoulders. Enchanted, he took one and wound it around his fingers, leaning forward to kiss it.

“You’re so gorgeous.” Jimin whispered, trailing his hand down my thigh. I wrapped my legs around his waist, fingers threading through his hair as I pulled him in for another kiss. His hands held my hips, squeezing gently. “Holy , you’re so ing beautiful.”

I stifled a sigh as he slowly ed the flannel shirt, kissing down my neck at the same time. It had taken me so long to button it. His hands explored my body as I closed my eyes, resting my forehead against his shoulder, trying to block out the memories of Jin.

Let’s get married. I want to marry you.

I heard his voice in my mind as Jimin picked me up and laid me down on the bed, shoving the bed. He let out an offended bark before padding out into the living room. I closed my eyes, listening as Jimin closed the door behind him. Soft footfalls and then the creak of the mattress before he was lying on top of me, leaving heated kisses on my neck, my stomach, my thighs as he shimmied off my tights.

“You’re beautiful, Sakura.” He whispered, and I imagined Jin above me, whispering those same words.

I won’t cry, I thought. But Jin’s voice kept ringing in my ears.

Just like we used to pretend.

But everything with Jin would always be make-believe. I didn’t want to play house with Jin in a mansion, acting out the part of a happily-married couple with our beautiful children. I couldn’t be in unrequited love my entire life, pouring out unanswered affection until I broke, just like my mother.

I couldn’t live my life like that.

“Sakura.” Jimin whispered, kissing my forehead. “Look at me.”

I hesitated for a moment, finally opening my eyes when Jimin climbed off of me. I watched him as he leaned against the headboard, taking a deep breath and running a hand through his hair.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, pulling the sheet over my body.

Jimin glanced over at me with a small smile. “Don’t force yourself.”

“I’m not for-” I began, but Jimin cut me off, placing a finger on my lips.

“I know when a woman is thinking of another man.” He said, a rueful smile on his face. “Don’t force yourself.”

“I’m sorry.” I whispered, burrowing under the covers in an attempt to hide myself. I suddenly felt so ashamed.

“Don’t be sorry.” He laid down next to me, pulling the sheet down to reveal my face. “I know you don’t love me.”

“I like you.” I said truthfully, reaching out a hand to cup his face. “I think you’re really great.”

“Thank you.” Jimin turned his head and kissed my palm. “I know, it’s hard.”

“Yeah.” I agreed, taking in a shaky breath. I felt like crying. “I’m sorry. Maybe this isn’t a good idea. I should go home.”

“Don’t go home.” Jimin whispered, kissing my forehead tenderly, his hand cupped around the back of my neck. “Put my shirt back on and we’ll cuddle. Wake up in the morning and eat cold pizza for breakfast while reading books. It’s Saturday tomorrow. Let’s not spend it alone.”

“Okay.” I nodded and Jimin sat up and picked his shirt up from the foot of the bed. He tugged the sheet down, revealing my body. I watched him bite his lip before he pulled my arm through the sleeve, dressing me. I shifted so he could pull my other arm through the corresponding sleeve. I played with his hair as he carefully buttoned up the flannel, lips centimeters from my skin. I could feel his breath on my body as she made his way up the shirt, inching closer and closer to my neck.

Finally, Jimin leaned back and surveyed me, satisfied.

“You look really beautiful like this.” He murmured, tugging on a curl. “Wild and free. Like a tiger or something.”

“What a fanciful imagination you have there.” I laughed, lifting the sheet so it covered him. I intertwined our legs as Jimin buried his nose in the crook of my neck, inhaling deeply.

“I’m going to fall asleep just like this.” He decided. “You smell so comfortable.”

“Mmm.” I held onto the fabric of his shirt, fingers curled loosely against the soft cotton.

I closed my eyes, listening to the sound of Jimin’s steady breathing.

I tried not to think of Jin.