For 5 whole seconds, nobody reacts.  

"."  Suho breathes, before starting to laugh like crazy.  "Just.... ."

How?  How could I missed it?

"Jongguk-ah, Uncle Mark is sorry okay?  I didn't mean it like that, honest.  Can you forgive meee?"  Mark's pleading voice suddenly comes in through Chanyeol's laptop speakers and I groan.  He actually is his uncle.  .

"So this really is his uncle?!  Yah, Chanyeol, check again!!  Click Victoria's name!  Maybe this is all just a big scary coincidence!"  Baekhyun says, slapping Chanyeol repeatedly.

"Here you go."  Chanyeol clicks on the name Victoria Tuan and right there, right before my eyes, I see the girl who left me six years ago.  I see the girl who I fell head over heels for.  I see the girl who, on February 28th, 6 in the afternoon, laid on the hospital bed in a white hospital gown, cradling the newborn Kim Jongguk.

I see the girl who was once everything in my life.

And suddenly, breathing becomes hard.

"Kai... are you okay?" 

"No."  I reply, closing my eyes.

"It's okay.  But I think I just want to go with noona today."  Jongguk's dejected voice replies seconds after, and I lean back from the pure force the shock gave me.  How could I miss it?  How could I not realize anything?

"Oh.. okay."  Mark sighs.  "Do you want me to take you there?"

There?  There where?!!

"There?!  There where?!!"  Baekhyun screams out loud.  What the .... creepy bro telepathy going on here.

"It's fine.  Jongguk and I can take the subway."  Iseul replies.  "Bye Mark."

"Oh.. okay."  Mark mumbles.  ing hell, Mark!!  Mark ing Tuan!!

"This guy?  This guy is really Jongguk's uncle?!"  D.O. squawks in disbelief. 

"He's Kai's ex-fianceé's younger brother?!"  Sehun pitches in.  He turns to me. "Who has met his nephew?!?!  Does he even know?"

"I don't know, I don't know!!" I groan, clutching my hair.  "Honestly everything is ing up!!"

"Go do your job!"  Iseul says jokingly, and oddly enough I'm able to picture her saying that in my mind. 

"Arrasso, arrasso.  Bye!"  In the distance, I watch Mark wave to Iseul and Jongguk. 

"Jongguk-ah, don't think about that babo okay?  Just think of... grocery shopping!  Target!  We can get you a toy or something today!"  Iseul begins to sound so excited which actually made me want to smile… if I weren’t six feet deep in right now.  "Then we can go home through Yongsangil-dong and have some street food there!  Like Kim Bok Joo!”

" Oh oh, and can we go to Bok Chicken??!?!  Can we meet Kim Bok Joo?!"  Jongguk immediately sounds high-spirited and again, I can see him laughing and tugging at Iseul's hand excitedly.  Note to self, run a background check on this Kim Bok Joo!”

"So um, do I turn it off now Boss?"  Chanyeol asks jokingly.  "Just kidding.  I am.  Stalking isn't healthy for you and I need to drive."

"Yah--"  I begin to protest but Chanyeol shuts his genious-hacker laptop down.  "Aish!"

"."  Suho says, like it's the only word he's ever known.  "... I still can’t believe I’m right.”

“Neither can I,” I say, nodding.

 “What are you gonna do about this Kai?”  Chanyeol asks, actually looking worried right now.

"How do you not know about this?!"  Sehun asks in sheer disbelief and I squeeze my eyes shut even tighter.

"I don't know... I don't know... maybe it's because we dated in utmost secrecy and when she got pregnant and we got engaged, her parents kicked her out.  I didn't really know her family... I've never even seen this guy before, and he's never met me either.  I knew she had a younger brother but... but I didn't think his name was Mark!  I don't remember her telling me about any Mark at all, Goddammit!!" I yell, banging my head on the window.  "And when I did a background check on him... I got someone else to do it, like I always do.  Which reminds me--  did I ask you, Yeol?"

"Me?"  Chanyeol looks at me with wide eyes.  "I actually—“

"And it's been six years!  I must've forgot even if she did mention him."  I continue, lost in my own angry monologue already. Did she mention any Mark at all?  I shake my head.  "Dammit.  Dammit.  I really don't know.  I don't know how we missed it.  God, I should've known if I did the background check my--" 

"Hang on a sec."  D.O. says all of a sudden.

I turn to look at him.

D.O.'s eyebrows are knitted together and his eyes shone with concentration.  "But if you did ask someone to run a background check on him, then you must've known his full name.  Which is Mark Tuan."  D.O. says critically, and my jaw drops at how right he was.  Did I actually know his name?

"Did you not realize that he was also a Tuan?"  D.O.  continues, and I curse again. 

"ing hell, Sherlock's right."  Baekhyun looks at D.O. in awe.  "How could you not know, Kai?"

"Until a few seconds ago, when Chanyeol typed his name in, I don't even remember.... Wait."  I turn abruptly to Chanyeol. 

Something's not right here.

"Chanyeol, how did you guess that he was Mark Tuan?"  I ask, trying hard to peer at him from the seat behind him. 

“What?”  Baekhyun's head immediately snaps at Chanyeol's direction.

Chanyeol quickly shakes his hands.  “I don’t!  I just typed in what—“

“And when Suho asked those questions...”  I turn to Suho.  “And Suho, how did you know that Vic had a brother named Mark?  No, how could you just… know that he’s her brother?”  I look from Suho to Chanyeol.  “I don’t remember her telling you anything about this guy.  And neither did I.” 

“Dudes… what the ?”  Sehun spits from the backseat.  “You guys knew?”

“And didn’t tell me?!”  I asked, still not being able to believe it.

“Okay before we break out into a stupid fight, I’d just like to say that— first of all, even if Suho knows, I didn’t, okay??”  Chanyeol swivels around to look at me.  “I just typed in what he was hinting at, and I guessed correctly because maybe I did subconsciously know he was a Tuan, which I found out about when you made me transfer her contacts and program her new number into all her contacts’ phone when you got her a new SIM card, remember?  After the weird psycho dude called her? That’s how I knew anything.”

“And I swear on my life that I didn’t know he was her brother either.”  Suho holds up two fingers.  “I totally guessed it.  I swear.”

I narrow my eyes, still doubtful.

Suho continues.  “It’s just—I remember you telling us that something seemed fishy about this guy, and that you felt like you’ve seen him somewhere before, remember?  And when I saw him just now I was like…. I think I’ve seen him too!  I tried to remember where I’ve seen him too— and I couldn’t quite place my finger on it… but as I listened to him talk… but it was his words that gave him away to be honest.”

“Him?”  I squint at Suho. 

“First of all, he has that not-so-Korean accent thing going on.  His intonation… his.. I don’t know, his accent hints Chinese.  Have you never noticed that?” 

“I’ve only met him like… twice!  The first time, he was singing along to this English song on the radio with Iseul in his cab, and the second time, he was singing something else in Korean!”  I scratch my head and shrug.  “Aish, he was being so noisy and I was so annoyed that I didn’t really pay attention.”

“He was busy being jealous, this guy.”  Baekhyun whispers loudly to his loverboy, who snickers before high-fiving the former.

 “For God’s sake!”  I groan. 

Suho continues.  “Well, after hearing him speak just now… he kept calling himself Uncle Mark to Jongguk!  Who the does that?  Not even us, who have seen diaper-stage Jongguk.  We call ourselves hyung.  Because that’s what little dudes call older dudes here in Korea.”  Suho looks around.  “From the moment he called himself that I already felt something was off.  And then he said he knows Iseul isn’t Jongguk’s mom like that.  And then, Kai, he freaking said, ‘your mom isn’t here right?’  How could he know?  That’s when it hit me.  He looks like Victoria.” 

“But how could you know too?”  I ask persistently.   “How could’ve guessed so spot-on that he was her brother?” 

Now Suho looks a bit flustered.  He bites his lip.  “That’s what I was just going to tell you.  Well… I did know that he was a Tuan too, to be honest.”

“WHAT?!”  I yell right in his face.  “You told me you—“

“I told you I didn’t know he was her brother!   And that’s true!  I guessed that part!   But I guessed it that easily and so spot-on, as what you said, because I found out that there was a Mark Tuan in Iseul’s life last night?  And I just realized, no, I just remembered 5 minutes ago, when he called himself Uncle Mark to Jongguk that Victoria was a Tuan too!”  Suho yells back.  “Aish, honestly, I just made the connection right here, 5 minutes ago.” 

“Last night?”  I repeat, raising my eyebrows. 

“Yeah, while you guys were at the underground club.”  Suho pauses.  “You guys remember how I didn’t wanna leave because I had too much the day before right?” 

“Yep.”  D.O. nods, concentrating hard on Suho.

“Well, I was lying there on the couch like she told me to.  And I don’t know if you guys saw or not yesterday, but the couch area was literally littered with her stuff.  I mean, there was her laptop on one side, and then some folders on the table, something about her grad-ball that you mentioned before, now that I think of it— and I even poked my on what turned out to be her transport card holder—“

“Yeah, that’s Iseul alright.”  I sigh.  “Then?” 

“Then it was right there!  Right at the very top of her grad-ball folder.  There was this spreadsheet which had the costs of the grad-ball décor or something, I’m not sure—“

I nod quickly.  Everything seems plausible up to this point.  Iseul did mention that she was on the grad-ball’s décor committee right?  When I came back from that cancelled trip to Hong Kong and lied saying that I was coming back to get her…  Aish, instead of swooning or something over that she actually asked WHY!!  I mean, the prank would’ve worked so much better if she just fell into it?!

“And then along the margins of the paper… um…”  Suho looks unsurely at me. 

“What?”  I eye him closely.  Then it hits me.  “Aaah.  She must’ve doodled stuff about him right?  Like, doodle his name all over it?” 

Suho nods quickly, which elicits a fake sob from Baek.  “Did it have hearts around it?” 

“You sure you wanna ask that in front of him?”  Sehun says, jutting his chin at me.  I glare at him. 

“Go on.”  I tell Suho. 

“So basically it was all over the sides of the paper.  The name Mark Tuan being circled over and over and over again with exclamation—haha, wait for it—MARKS around it, and it was underlined, and there were couple of… stars, actually, around it.”  Suho lets out a confused half-laugh.  “It didn’t have any hearts, just so you know, but she did draw stars.” 

“So?  I don’t care.”  I mutter, but Suho only nudges me playfully.  “Aish!  Then what?!”

“That’s it!  There were a few other ‘Mark Tuan’s, and there were some other words like, ‘hungry~~”  and a ‘Kim Bok Joo!’ and even a ‘Nam Joohyuk’—AH!  WHICH REMINDS ME!!  THE NAM JOOHYUK HAD A HEART BESIDE IT!!  YAH KAI!!  CODE RED!  FIND NAM JOOHYUK!!”

“Nam… Joohyuk??”  I repeat, rolling the word over my tongue.  Hmm, I’m positive that I’ve never heard about that guy before.  Did I miss something she said or….

“Forget the Joohyuk dude, what I wanna know is who the hell Kim Bok Joo is!  Sounds like a weird- pseudonym to me!”  Baekhyun says, nodding decisively to himself.  “Wait, does Jongguk know who this Bok Joo is too?”

“Yeah… I think Bok Joo is the person Jongguk mentioned before right?  And Iseul mentioned him too!”  Chanyeol points his finger at me, like his trying to say something but can’t quite remember what it is.  “Uh… uh… Yongsangil-dong!  Youngsangil-dong!”

“Aish, we’re getting off tangent here!”  I grumble, although I have to admit, I am literally itching to know who this Bok Joo that Jongguk wants to meet is. 

And who the Nam Joohyuk (with a heart) is too!

“That’s it!  Yesterday night, I remember getting a funny feeling because when I read Mark Tuan over and over again, because it was scrawled like 3 or 5 times around the paper, I felt like I’ve known this name somewhere, you know?  And that it just seems familiar!”  Suho re-addresses me.  “Then seeing Mark and hearing him call himself Uncle…  I just realized that it was the surname I was familiar with, you know?  Tuan.  Victoria Tuan.  Bam.  ing mindblown.”

“Holy ing .”  I mutter to myself in utter amazement.

“Yah, Kai.  Now it’s my turn to ask you something.”  Suho taps my knee. 

I look at him.  “What?” 

“I know six years was a long time ago, and you’ve really went all out to go and just forget about her... but how could you really not know anything?”  He gestures his hands vaguely.  “I mean… did you not catch anything?”  

“I know I’m so stuuuupid!”  I moaned, clutching my head.  “I didn’t even remember the fact that his full name is Mark Tuan.  And like I’ve already mentioned, I didn’t actually meet him that often!  I just hear Iseul mention his name a lot, Mark this, Mark that… so that’s why I didn’t catch anything.” 

“Well.”  Chanyeol clears his throat.  “There’s that… so we good now right?”

Suho nudges me.  “We good, bro?”

“Only if you guys aren’t lying.”

“I swear, we aren’t.  It was just a matter of coincidence and deduction, I swear.”  Suho holds up two fingers, and Chanyeol quickly does too. 

“Arrasso.”  I nod, deciding to trust them.  These guys didn’t betray me even with their life at stake, so why would they do so now? 

“Okay okay so can we get some food now?”  Sehun asks in an insufferably bored voice from the back. 

“Yes!!  Food!”  Baekhyun makes a shooting gesture with his fingers.  “Call!”

“Kai’s treat, right?” D.O. asks, smiling evilly at me.  I know what he has in mind already.  Probably high-class teppanyaki buffet, or something else equivalent to the haute couture of food.  But no!  We’re not going there today.  Because…

“Yup.  My treat.”  I smirk.  “Bok Chicken.” 

“Yah we’ve went around Yongsangil-dong 3 times already, where the hell is it?!”  Chanyeol, our tired and cranky driver, yells exasperatedly.  “Are you sure it’s in Yongsangil-dong?!” 

“Yeah, positive!”  I reply.  I look around.  “This neighborhood isn’t that big… it’s bound to be here somewhere…” 

“Yah!  Google maps it or something, jebal!  I’m getting hangry here!”  Chanyeol groans, looking at me through the rearview mirror.  Which, by the way, if you didn’t know, is a mashup of hungry and angry.

“I already did!  But for some reason… nothing came up!  There’s no such place as Bok Chicken!”  I try again, refreshing the page furiously. 

“Aish, then what the hell?!  Let’s just eat wherever, at this point!  I don’t even care!”  Chanyeol yells, stepping on the gas.  “Everybody keep their eyes open for food!” 

I frown.  “Wait!  But—but what if Bok Chicken is some scam place that Iseul and Jongguk are—“

“Yah, Kai, if we can’t find it, then they’ll never be able to either, arrasso?”  Baekhyun interrupts, sounding starved already.  “Yah, Yeol, there’s a hotpot restaurant right there!  Let’s hit it!”

5 minutes later, the guys are making it rain.

“Meat!  More meat!”  Suho hollers, and Baekhyun, sitting right next to the take-it-yourself fridge where all the items are, reaches over and pulls out another plate of raw red beef. 

“That’s three plates already!” he announces happily, pushing all the meat in the pot with his chopsticks. 

“I want more of the glue fish!  Oh, and the meatballs!”

“Hey!  Enoki!  Who took my enoki?!”

“Doesn’t matter, just take another one!”  Sehun says, eyeing me gleefully.  I sigh and make an I’ll-kill-all-of-you-later face as I absently fish out a piece of abalone.  It’s not that I don’t like the food—the hot pot is great, take it from me, but I just—

What the hell is Bok Chicken?!

Who the hell is Kim Bok Joo?!

And lastly, who the hell is Nam Joohyuk?!  Isn’t one stupid guy enough for her??  Huh???  Where is she gonna put Mark Tuan if she likes Nam Joohyuk huh?  And if she liked him so much then how I come I never hear her mentioning him?!  Why did she even say yes to that idiot Mark when he asked her to grad-ball huh?  Does Nam Joohyuk not like her back?  And Kai, why the hell are you even thinking about this??

GO!  EAT!  That’s your money they’re cooking! 

Filled with resolution to just dump all those stupid Iseul-related thoughts in the hot pot to evaporate, I shove the abalone in my mouth and chew furiously.  Aish… so many problems!  Does Mark know about Jongguk being his legit blood nephew at all?  Has he told Victoria about any of this?  And if Mark does know, how did he?  Did Vic leak any information about me, my job, and the HOC in general?  Goddammit!!!   Maybe Sooman was right…. No.  He wasn’t. 

“Kai!  Hurry eat that last piece of shrimp before D.O. dies from an overload of shrimp poop in his body!!”  Baekhyun yells, interrupting my thoughts.  “Yah, why aren’t you eating?  This is seriously so good!”

“How can I eat when I just found out that the creeptard Iseul has been hanging around with is really Jongguk’s uncle?!”  I say in frustration.  “Hey, I need to see this Mark, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, of course you do.”  Chanyeol says, chewing.  “But first, you need to eat!”

I sigh passively.  And what about Bok Chicken??

Suddenly, I feel a raging urge to go.

Go where?

Go and track Iseul and Guk down just to make sure they’re safe, of course.

“Oh my GOD!”  I suddenly exclaim, slapping the table.  ‘Yah, ALL OF YOU!  I NEED YOUR OPINION!!”

Immediately, all 5 pair of eyes—along with about 10 other in the restaurant—froze and slowly turned to me.  A piece of lettuce fell from Sehun’s mouth.   “I bet you my ing house that this is about Iseul.” He says through a mouthful of rice.

Aish!!!  Stupid idiotas!!  I ignore the comment and continue with my main purpose of gathering their attention like this.  “Do you think I should tell Iseul about this?  About Mark being Jongguk’s uncle and ??”

D.O. rolls his eyes.  “Aish, this was the question?  Of course you should!!”

"Yeah, do you want her to quit... again?!"  Suho seconds.  "She'll totally do if she doesn't find out about this from you, Kai."

"I know, but... how do I tell her?  I can't just go 'Ayo wassup you know that Marky dude you like?  Mhmm he's my ex-fianceé's sister which means he's Jongguk's uncle bruh!'"

"Maybe a little less thug-like?"  Baekhyun suggests.  "Like, 'babe, you know that Mark guy who's been hanging around you a lot?  Yeah, he's me--"

"Shut up." I mutter.  It's hopeless asking these guys for help, really.  The only thing they know how to do probably is kill and clean it up quickly!

"You should just bring it right up to her, Kai."  Suho says, and I turn to him because he's the only one capable of giving actual advice.  Never trust Baekhyun with your personal life, trust me.  Your drunk self would still have done better.

"So I really should just go and talk about it... like that?"

"Yeah, because if you wait for an opportunity to slide into the topic smoothly... it probably will never come so in the end, you're not going to tell her." Suho shrugs.  "If she finds out from Mark I'd say it's game over with your work contract deal, dude."

"O-kay... but what do I tell her first?"  I ask.  "The fact that Mark is Jongguk's cousin or the secret about Jae?"

"God, you're so ed up."  Baekhyun shakes his head.  "You know what?  It doesn't matter. She'll freak out anyway.  I'd suggest you do it drunk and kill both birds in the same conversation." 

"Hey!!" I protest.  "I'm not gonna do it drunk!"

"Why not?  You grow the balls to spill everything by being drunk!"

"Along with other irrelevant nonsense, so nope!"

"Suit yourself."  Baek shrugs.  "Just tell her."

"Yeah, Kai."  Suho nudges me.  "Before she finds out secondhandedly again."

I sigh.  Okay, so I'm gonna have to tell her.  But when?

For some reason, by 5 in the afternoon, my son and his babysitter isn't home yet.  I went back home to change into my gym clothes and grab my gym back, even went to the gym for a workout session already, did a bit of Muay Thai and kicked that dude’s face while I'm at it because I can, and came back home again to find that this girl is still not home yet???  I'm pretty sure you don't take 3 hours to grocery shop!!

"Where the ....?"  I whisper to myself as I open my Line to see if there was anything from her.  But no!  She hasn't told me anything yet! 

This is why I need to install one of those phone tracker thingys on her.  The one like I saw the dude in that mermaid drama of hers had.  I bet I myself could get it done in no time-- no need for Chanyeol.  Anyway, what time is it now?? 5.10??  Where the is this woman exactly??

I know, I know.  I should just call her.  It's really just one click away.  But.  I.  Don't.  Want.  Too!!  I have to act cold so that she doesn't get any wrong ideas, because, believe it or not, I don't like her okay??  Not in the romantic sense at all!  Yeah, she's cute and funny and kind and also quite pretty but please, pretty funny cute kind girls aren't for me. 

I'm a little too mobster for that.

The door clicks open and a second later--

"Jjang!!" 

I jump and quickly slam my phone down on the table.  .  Why did I even do that?  Keep calm, Kai!  This is not you!!

Eherm.  Okay so they're back.  That's great right?  Now how do I ask about ing Bok Chicken without letting her know I eavesdropped her conversation???

"Come on Jongguk!!  Let's go try it!!"  Iseul squeals excitedly, running across the room without even acknowledging me.  I raise my hand and try to grab her attention but she disappeared into her room already.  "Turn it on because Noona doesn't know how okay??"

"Okay!!  Noona just hurry up and get changed!!"

What in the world?!   What are they up to this time?!!

"Jongguk-ah!"  I call, and my son immediately skids to a stop.  Holding a huge blue bottle in his hand, he runs over to me excitedly. 

"Appaaaaa!"  He says affectionately, hugging my torso.  When he does this, when he makes me feel like I'm the best father in the world, it always makes me think how much I don't deserve him.  I don't deserve an angel like this.  I don't deserve to have such a loving and pure child.  Just like he doesn't deserve to have such a ass father with a ed up job who barely spends any time with him.

If one day I do retire from being a mobster, and decide to adopt a fake ID and live somewhere along the Mediterranean Sea, Jongguk will be the only sole basis of my decision.

Unless… you know.  He grows up and decides he wants to ruin his life just like me!

"Did Appa go to the gym?"  Jongguk wrinkles his nose. 

I glance down at my sweat-drenched muscle tank and grin sheepishly.  "Yeah.  Why?"

"Appa stinks."  Jongguk replies cheekily.  "But luckily, noona just bought Jongguk a......"

Cue the drumrolls please.  I already have a feeling of what it is. 

"...Coca-cola smelling bubble bath!!!"  He squeals, proudly presenting the blue bottle.  My jaw drops.  It's worse than I expected!  This one smells like freaking Coca-cola!!

"Jongguk, I'm ready!!"  Iseul suddenly emerges wearing a--

"YAH!  WHEN DID YOU GET HERE??"  she points accusingly at me with her back pressed on the door.  She's wearing a thin white tank top with the shortest pair of red shorts I've ever seen, by the way.  Which is completely, totally unexpected. 

And did she really have to wear a black bra underneath?

Shut up, Kai.  Shut the up. 

"An hour before you did, hello to you too."  I reply, pointedly glaring at her as I down a glas of water to cool my nerves the down.  For a scratch of a second, I notice her eyes subtly roaming my shoulder and arms.  She then quickly looks away, blinking madly, and I mentally smirk.  She's so obvious it's almost cute. 

"Noona!  Appa is going to join us too!"  Jongguk proudly declares, shaking my arm. 

Iseul's eyes pop out of their sockets like hot pockets.  "WHAT?!  Well if he's joining then I won't!!"

Ooooh.  I see what's going on here.  Iseul was gonna have a bubble bath with Jongguk in my jacuzzi that she still has no idea how to properly use!

"What?!"  Jongguk shrieks. "No!!  Appa has to shower too!  He just went to the gym and now he's smelly!!"

"Yeah, yeah, Appa can join but if he does then I won't!!"  Iseul replies resolutely. 

"But why not?!"  Jongguk asks, looking at me with a mortified expression.  "Noona said noona can't wait to try this out!!"  He shakes the bottle vigorously.  

"Yah, don't shake!!  It'll spill!"  I interject, stopping him.

Iseul looks at Jongguk like she cannot believe his stupidity, which is probably the case right now.  "Becaaaause, Jongguk, noona can't shower with your appa, duh!!"  

"But why not?!"  Jongguk demands persistently.  "It will be much more fun with noona and appa!!"

Iseul looks at me and she looks so ing lost it's hilarious.  I let out a snicker and her eyes turn huge and wide and protesting which makes her look even funnier.  "Kai!  Explain!!"

"No, I think I'll let you do it this time."  I smile.  "Whose idea was the bubble bath again?"

"Whose kid is it asking the crazy questions again??"

Oooh, not bad.  "Who gave the kid the reason to ask crazy questions again?  You!"

"I'm not a kid!"  Jongguk huffs.  Yeah, whatever!

"What?!"

"If you didn't refuse joining our fun little bubble bath here..."  I start, slinging my hand over Jongguk, "he wouldn't have asked."

"Co-rrect!"  Jongguk agrees readily.

"Then are you saying we should—"  her nostrils flare and drops open, "shower together?!"

I grin.  Annoying the crap out of her has become my number one hobby!

"Aish, whatever, whatever!!  Jongguk, noona can't shower together with appa because that's only what married people do, arrasso??  Now bye!  I want to get changed!" 

"Why only married peopleeee?!  Just now noona said noona wants to shower with Jongguk!"  Jongguk stomps his feet childishly.  "Noona stop lying!!"

"I'm not!!"

"Then does noona want to marry Jongguk?"

"...HAHAHAHAHA!!"  I burst out laughing, unable to keep it in anymore.

"AaaaRGHHH!!!"  Iseul shrieks, angrily rubbing her face.  "Aish!  Fine, let's go!  LET'S GO!!"

OH MY GOD just look at her.  Look at her lose her all over the— wait, what??

"YAAAYYYYIIEEEE!"  Jongguk screams like a minion, running over to the bathroom. 

I stand there, slack-jawed.  Is she serious about this?  Is this even Iseul? Am I hallucinating?  Am I dreaming?  Did she really just say 'LET'S GO!' to a bubble bath with Jongguk and me?

"Are you coming or not?!" She snaps at me, and I stand there blinking like the ultimate moron.  She tsks impatiently and follows Jongguk into the bathroom, leaving me in standing in the living room alone. 

"."  I whisper to myself.  This is really happening.  I shove all thoughts about Bok Chicken and Nam Joohyuk and Kim Bok Ju to the lowest drawer on the very back of my mind... and take off my muscle tank.

Shower time, es.

ISEUL'S POV

Lalalala, guess who needs a restraining order?

This !  ME!!

Did I really just say 'Let's go!!' to shower time with Jongguk AND KAI?!  I mean, Kai?!  KAI?!  Freaking mobster boss, my literal boss, bossy Kai?!

Even though 'let's go' doesn't mean 'I'll join in the bubble bath with you'... MUAHAHAHA!!!

But goddammit!  I knew I should have left those bubble bath bottles back in the aisle I saw them.  They should never have been on that stupid BUY 1 GET 2 deal!

"More noona more!!"  Jongguk claps, splashing around in his underwear inside the jacuzzi tub as I squirt some of the bubble bath into the water.

"No!!  This is too much already!  If this gets outta hand and spills all over the floor, guess who's cleaning it up?!  Me!!"  I quickly close the cap and set the bottle aside.  "There!  Now we mix!!" 

I kneel in front of the tub and reach my arm in, mixing everything together.  It quickly develops into foamy, bubbly , causing Jongguk to practically bring the house down with those animalistic shrieks of his. 

"More!!  More!!"

"The whole house smells like diabetes already!"  A very grouchy and familiar voice snaps from the doorway behind me.  Irritatedly blowing some hair away from my face, I turn around to counter that but—

Boom.

I'm dead.

I'm literally DOA (dead on arrival)!!

My heart did not freaking ANTICIPATE such y and shirtless with ing rock-hard abs and a very tempting V-line Kai.  How is this possible, even?  His arms, God, his veins, and his body-- tanned and sculpted and the happy trail leading down to--

Oh God, nosebleed.  Nosebleed I swear.  I don't know if I'm nosebleeding yet or not but sooner or later, if this Greek-god-y presence lingers another second around my weak, mortal heart, I'll be shooting my next period out through my nose.  I swear!!

That is, if I still have ovaries after they explode from thi—

"Take a picture, it'll last longer."  Kai smirks, shutting the door behind him as he steps inside.

I splutter.  "No-- I-- Yah!!"

"What was that?"  He asks, sarcastically sweet.  He stands beside me with one hand on his hip and I swear, it takes all I have in me to just prevent myself from ting all over the floor.  I don't even know how to properly react to the fact that he's a mobster, and now the Lord just has to rub it in my face that he's got an extremely able body—WHOA who said that— too??

"Nothing."  I mumble quickly turning away.  Stop looking Iseul.  Stop wanting to look, even!  I bet you're as red as a tomato by now!

"Whatever you say then."  Kai says, cautiously stepping inside tub with his back facing me.  Thank God he can't see me.  I'm basically a messy hormonal trash overdosing on his testosterones right now.  And , that tattoo.  I barely remember he has one on the base of his neck.  God, it looks even ier on his like this.

STOP STARING YOU IDIOT!!!  

"Are you gonna continue staring at me from behind?"  Kai ask, looking over his shoulder.  He smirks that illegally y smirk of his. "Get in here and join us!"

The Lord is testing me.

"No!"  I manage to croak, drying my arm with a towel nearby. 

"What no?!  Noona said you're gonna join!!"

"I said 'let's go' not 'I'll get in take a bubble bath with you' didn't I?"  I say mischievously, extremely proud of myself for being able to trick the both of them.

"MWO?!"  The two dudes yell at the same time.

Heol!  But why is Senior protesting too?!  Does he actually want to--

No, stop you , STOP!  STOP!!  You still need that brain for graduate school, please stop pushing your IQ down the mothering drain!!

"Bleh!!"  I stick out my tongue proudly.  "Paaaboooo~"

"Appa!!"  Jongguk screams, pointing at me.  "Noona!!"

"Well... she did say that, didn't she Guk?"  Kai says slowly as he lathers himself with the bubbles.  , how come he looks so attractive doing that? 

I mean, glistening wet skin, semi-weight hair, his broad shoulders and chest rising from the white foam...

And oh God, his collar bones.  I want to bite them. 

Holy , what?!  Who am I even?!  Since when did I get so…. Jeez.

"So technically... she's right!"  Kai continues, trying to make a foam beard on Jongguk. 

I.

WANT. 

IN!!!

/slaps self/

Oh, and in case you were wondering, he's wearing basketball shorts under all those bubbles.  If not I would've—

Let's just say I'd be 9 inches less of a already.  HEHEHE. 

LOL.  Who am I kidding.  I'm Seo Iseul, the girl who freaks out and flees when a bare male organ comes within 3 km radius of her pathetic self.  Bye life!!

"But— but— that's not fair!"  Jongguk stutters, probably not knowing what to do with the blow that just insulted his manly child ego. 

"Noona will just stay here and accompany us bathing while doing her homework or watching some drama, right noona?"  Kai says, looking at me.  Finally, finally this guy puts himself into some good use!

"Uh..." 

Kai glares at me.

And I, instantly comply. 

"Absolutely!"  I nod hastily.  "Hold on, I'll just get my laptop."

Dashing out, I quickly return with my laptop in hand and settle above the toilet bowl.  Turning it on, I head over to my regular Kdrama streaming site and continue with the 15th episode of WEIGHTLIFTING FAIRY KIM.  BOK.  JOOOOO!!! 

I cannot express how much I absolutely adore this drama!   Lee Sungkyung and Nam Joohyuk's chemistry-- GODDAMMIT, I WAANTTT!!!   Jeon Joonhyung is just so cute and thoughtful and loving to Bok Ju!!  And even though Bok Ju is so freaking noisy and talkative, she's also very lovable and affectionate towards Joonhyung!!  Not to mention Bok Ju's friends!  DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON SUN OK AND NANHEE!!

"What are you watching noona??"  Jongguk asks as he struggles to push Kai--who's trying to bury his son in bubbles--off valiantly.   Which is soooo not adorable, by the way.

"Weightlifting fairy!!" I reply.  "There's a new episode already!!"

"From mermaids, to fairies... what else?  Goblins?"  Kai asks boredly.

HAHAHAHA GOBLIN???  doesn't even know where he landed!!

"GASP!!  HOW DID YOU KNOW??"  I gasp exaggeratedly.   "Omooo, you've been watching it too, haven't you!!'

"What?!"  Kai shoots me an annoyed glare. 

"Goblin!!  That's another drama I'm watching!!"  I continue feigning my surprise just to annoy him even more.  "You totally like dramas now don't you!  And it's all thanks to... moi!"

"Seriously?!"  Kai wrinkles his nose.  "There's a drama called Goblin?!"

"Yeah, with the Grim!  Do you want me to tell you about it?"  I offer cheerfully, knowing fully well that he'll reject it in a heartbeat. 

"What I do want you to tell me is..."  Kai pauses, as if reconsidering, "who the hell is Nam Joohyuk??  Is he another boyfriend of yours??  And what about Kim Bok Ju?  That sounds like a stupid pseudonym to me!!  And where in the world is Bok Chicken huh?!!  Yes, I know about all those because I saw them doodled across your files that you left on the living room table, now spill!!"

Crickets crickets.

I blink.  "...What?"

Kai's face starts morphing into that 'I KILL YOU!!' face he often gives me.  "Do you really want to make me repeat all that?!"

But I'm genuinely confused.  Did he really just ask about Bok Ju, Nam Joohyuk, and a fictional chicken restaurant?!

"Great, your babysitter's deaf now Jongguk."

"Appa, you know Bok Ju and Nam Joohyuk too?"  Jongguk asks instead, looki