Broken
Immortal
Jackson's POV
The alcohol burns my throat as I chug another bottle down. I snarl as I throw the now empty bottle into the pile behind me, frustrated that even now, I cant get drunk. I sigh.
I want to get drop dead drunk but I cant.
I want to feel my throat burn and my mind throbbing pain as the alcohol takes over me but I cant..
I want to forget about tonight...
But I cant.
Flashes of what I saw in our victims minds fill my mind causing my body to shake and my lips to tremble. I bite back my tears as I smash open another bottle. Glass scatters onto the floor as I stare intently at the sharp jagged edges of the bottle. My mind blanks as I sense a dark shadow take over me, bringing the bottle nearer to my lips.
The glass tears at my mouth as my blood mixes with the alcohol in the bottle. It continues to cut my lips, the edges of my mouth and my tongue as I chug the cardboard tasting drink down. The pain is refreshing. Feeling my blood slip down to my chin almost makes me feel human again. Almost.
The pain disappears as fast as it comes, my body already starting to heal with whatever of the red liquid left in me. I curse. I want that refreshing feeling again. I need it.
My head hits the table as I stare at my blood dripping from the bottle Ive been drinking. The way it drips onto the floor, staining the floor crimson red and the way the jagged pieces of glass catch the moonlight. My mind goes blank, almost as if Im no longer in control of my own body, as I watch my own hand smash the bottle to pieces. Jagged pieces of glass stray across the table as my slightly bleeding hand grabs the biggest piece, gripping it hard as it get stained crimson red. Slowly, I twist it around in my hand, watching as the moonlight bounces of the red glass. I bring it to my neck, pressing it down until I feel a stinging pain.
I catch my reflection in one of the jagged pieces on the ground, the glass at the nape of my neck, the blood dripping from it and the smile across my face; the crazy sinister smile of someone who is done with his life.
I close my eyes as Im about to drag the glass across my neck, ready for the pain. Ready for my last breath.
???: Coward.
Jackson: Tsk. Always spoiling the mood now arent you JB..
My hand was gripped and forced away from my neck as I open my eyes to see a disapproving JB.
JB: If you want to take your life, let it at least be by battle, not by some petty will to die-
I grip him by the neck, smashing him to wall but he doesnt even wince. I growl a reply,
Jackson: If you had even seen what I saw, YOU'D WANT TO DIE!
I watch as even as hes strangles by the neck, he keeps a calm expression and places a hand on my shoulder, smiling as he says,
JB: Then show me.
Shocked, I release my grip and back away.
JB: *Rubs neck* Nasty grip.. *notices Jackson's shock expression*
JB: *Places hand on Jackson's shoulder* We're brothers Jackson, youre pain is mine. If your suffer, we all suffer. So, show me what you saw.
I chuckle, a wet tearful chuckle as the tears Ive been holding back come pouring out. A newfound strength fills me, its source holding me tight on my shoulder.
~~~~~
JB: man, how'd you even swallow this .
I chuckle as JB throws the empty bottle aside, a disgusted expression on his face. Human food taste disgusting to us, and I have to agree that the alcohol tasted like piss on cardboard after drinking it with a sane mind.
I feel the cold night breeze pass on my skin as I shiver thinking just how close I was to ending my life.
JB: Hey man, stop thinking about it. I would be pretty shaken after seeing what you saw.
Jackson: Yeah but you'd handle it better than me. Not go into depression and try to slice your neck open..
JB: Dont underestimate yourself man. You just witnessed around a 100 men's death and your girlfriend is officially in a state of "I-dont-know-who-you-are-you-monster" shock yet here you stand, drinking piss-tasting beer underneath the moonlight.
I laugh as he playfully punches my arm but I know hes right. The only reason I fell into that state of utter darkness was because I doubted myself and let the darkness swallow me up. I need to learn to accept terms as they are, and that means dealing with Youngji officially being scared of me.
JB: Speaking of Youngji, where'd you leave her anyway?
Jackson: Our forest villa. Best spot I could think of in such a sort while.
JB: Safest spot too. But shouldn't you be there explaining stuff to her by now.
Jackson: *sighs* I dont know man. I dont think I ready to face her scared expression again, knowing Im the one causing it..
JB: *chuckles* Trust me, I know what you mean. But let me give you a little advice.
I look down from the moon to my brother. His expression is serious but his eyes hide the sadness of losing your one true love whom youve thought would stay with you through thick and thin but ends up betraying that trust and leaving you alone.
JB: Dont drag it any longer. The more you stall the harder it gets to let her go.
~~~~~
I reach the forest villa fast, Marc on my tail. Standing at the door, I cant bear myself to open the door. I feel Marc place his hand on my shoulder as I read his mind. Its ok. Her aura is mostly just a mixture of worry and her being afraid.
I nod, reassured by her feelings. As much as I trust her, JB still doesnt so he made sure Marc came. If she truly isnt on our side, her feelings will give it away.
I place my hand on the handle and turn. Instantly, I hear her pacing stop from the kitchen. I take a deep breath and walk towards her.
I hear her gasp as I enter the room and Im shocked to see her shaky hands holding a knife. Cold sweat gathers as I hold up my hands in surrender. The last thing I want is for her to hurt herself.
Jackson: Youngji-ah.. Its-Its me.. Put that down, please.
I watch as her body starts to shake and her lips part as she tries to speak. Her grip hardens around the knife as she looks down, almost as if she cant let go of it as much as she wants to.
I cant take it anymore. I run to her side, appearing in front of her in an instant and grabbing hold of the knife in the process. She gasp while I lift her face to meet my gaze. As our eyes connect, I feel her grip loosen and her body start to shake less. I shake my head making her loosen her grip with the knife completely, as f she just realized what she was doing.
I hug her close but she doesnt hug me back, her fist balled by her side. I sigh. I know shes holding back until she understands whats going on.
I send Marc a mental message, telling him to keep a close eye on her emotions and keep me updated before gently grabbing her hand and leading her towards the second floor,
Jackson: Come on, I'll answer your questions upstairs.
I lead her to my room in the forest villa. Its empty except for a bed and a small couch next to it. I take a seat on the couch but she chooses to sit on the edge of the bed facing me instead of beside me. I feel my heart break slightly but push the feeling down as I lean forward, showing her Im ready for her questions.
Jackson: I know this is all... New to you but I'll answer anything you ask so..
Youngji: I.. I have so much to ask.. To understand.. But.......
Her voice trails of at the end. I my head to the side, inviting her to continue but her gaze falls to the ground. I reach out to Marc for help. As his thoughts float into mine, I cant help but lift her lips to mine.
She's confused. She wants to know the truth but shes scared that the truth may take you away from her..
I replay what Marc had said over and over again in my head as I kiss her deeply, muttering the words she longs to hear,
Jackson: You will never lose me.
As I say this in between kisses, tears stream down her face as she responds to the kiss now, pulling my face closer as she hugs me close. We stay like this for what seems like hours before finally breaking apart to catch our breaths. Her tears still run down her cheeks as she lays her forehead on mine. I wipe away her tears, her pent up feelings as I caress her face, leaving a small peck on her forehead and hugging her close to me.
Youngji: .......... I really do hate you sometimes....
Jackson: *smiles* I know..
Youngji: *Pushes him away* Im serious. You just left me there... I didnt know what to do, I didnt know what was going on, Heck, I didnt even know if-
Her voice trails away at the last part but her eyes give it away.
She was scared I wouldnt come back, that she lost me in that fight.
I take her hand and kiss her fingertips, wrapping them in mine as I rest my gaze upon hers,
Jackson: As long as I live, I will never leave you. Ever.
Harrooooooooo
Again, sorry if this chapter came out later than usual, Im really busy this week because my exams are two weeks away >~< (And I should be studying but distractionsssss HAHAHA)
Alsooooo,
HAPPY RAMADHAN/ FASTING MONTH TO ALL THE MUSLIMS OUT THERE!!!!!! It may be hard (or may not) but let it be the month that test your patience and strength. It only comes once a year so lets pull through this wonderful month together ;)
And also,
@heegunsungim95 : Thank yew so much for the support!!! More Jackji next chapter but hope this satisfies a bit of the suspense :D
@Lillethy: Thank you for being such an awesome reader!!! Saranghae~~~ and pls keep reading despite my non-consistent updates ^^"
Anyway, hope you guy enjoyed this chapter! Its a bit dark but I wanted to show how bad the situation was on Jackson, with the people he brought to their deaths being humans and not immortals like them and Youngji finding out about his secret and all. I also wanted to show how easy it was for people to fall into the darkness/ depression, a personal experience of mine.
Hope that all of you are happy with where this story is going hahha. I tend to put in a lot of personal (both good and bad) experiences in the chapters when I write so it means alot to me if you guys comment on the story. Especially if you think the story is too dark or you more of this or that, please dont be afraid to leave a small comment! I will reply to them like above~
Anyway, I'll see you guys in the next chapter~
Love you my little bookworms~~
- Syarahh <3
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