Italic = Moon

Normal = Bang

*

I’m Moon Hyuna, member of the girls band Nine Muses. Not that popular, right ? That’s right, when you think of Hyuna, Kim Hyuna pops out automatically.  

I’ve always loved him. I mean in a platonic way,  fan to musician. I was a sunbae to him but as soon as he debuted or maybe even when he was still in the underground, I loved his character. Bang Yong Guk, he seemed lovable, kind of person that bring light to your days. But I’ve never thought that one day our relation will be more than fan to musician, sunbae to doensaeng.

I remember that day, where both of our groups were promoting. He had made fell his microphone, and as I had my eyes glued on him, on his charming manners, on his dazzling person, I didn’t miss that fact out. I just pick it on the floor and even before thinking of how to call him back, he was there, smiling.

I handed him back his microphone and he bowed a little to me, whispering a little “thanks”. At this moment I was surely an appreciable person for Bang Yong Guk, this person that you just are in contact with for seconds, not the one that you want to share your house, your life with as a spouse.

He’s sat there on the couch, watching mindlessly some TV show. In such a bad mood. I never wanted this to happen, I never wanted to discover his true character and now I’m stuck here, as his wife for a large part of my life.

I don’t want to be here.

In this apartment, with our wedding photos everywhere. Neither do I want to assist or organize diners for my in-laws where both of us need to fake some closeness.

In this silence, this unbearable silence.

*

I didn’t know her, she was from a rather “nugu” group and I didn’t really like their style. Now, I can say that they’re underrated, for models with singing ability.

Myself was too taken by my current relationship that nothing else mattered. Kim Hyuna, this kind, cute, bubbly girl. Nothing like her y character on stage. Hyuna was a simple girl, shy, capricious and full of complexes. She had nothing to be ashamed of, by the way. She’s the sweetest and the cutest girl I’ve ever met in my life.

Those days in my apartment when we would jus cuddle for hours, make love as sweetly as we could with the passion burning in us, I’m missing those days. I remember well when those days ended, when this innocence was replaced with something more eager, more quicker. After the wedding, this disponibility, this slow way to love each other was gone, it was still the same apartment, but with those wedding photos, with the fear to be caught on during the act. All was quickier, from my way to kiss her to my way to send her out.

I knew Moon knew, but she never talked about my bed or my hair being messy those days. She would just sit there in silence, in this unbreakable silence.

“Hey, son, we have found the one for you.” My father told me one day.

I didn’t met her until the wedding day. All I knew was that her name was Hyuna, I was persuaded that my family and hers were doing us a surprise and I was pretty excited for this day to come. 7^th december 2012 I arrived with my suit, all pampered by my mom. Ready to see my little sun coming with her wedding dress. At this time I thought the concert she was supposed to perform at was just a part of the big lie surrounding the wedding.

I was surprised the first time I saw my future wife, she had this simple white dress on, more a summer dress than a wedding one. My mom never forgot this dress, this slight act of rebellion. And well, my mom never really liked Moon at all.

I was so enraged that I grabbed her wrist. “Who are you ?”

She looked at me with those terrified eyes, back then I didn’t realized that her eyes were slightly red, sign that she cried before coming.

"Hyuna.” She answered, quite disoriented.

I almost wanted to slap her, she answered honestly but I was so sure that My Hyuna will come. Her mom approached us and set her free.

"Yong Guk, I introduce you to my daughter, Moon Hyuna."  The young woman bowed quite politely, forced by the firm hand of her mother on her shoulder.

We had a bitter wedding dinner that night, I realized that my parents just dislike Hyuna and put this substitute as my wife to make it hard for me to date her.

"I hope you don’t feel too deceived that you can’t go on your honeymoon ?" My mother in law asked me that night.

I looked at the woman sat next to me, eating as much as a bird and I felt relieved that we didn’t have to go on a honeymoon together. This dinner with my parents and her mother just ended as fast as we signed the papers.

“So I hope you two will get to know each others, I’m sorry that we let the surprise live until tonight !” My father said to us, dropping us at my apartment. He looked at Hyuna with admiration, as a kid seeing Santa Claus for the first time. At that time I didn’t get why, I just looked at Hyuna smile back, actually she moved her lips, but I’m sure even herself doubted that she was making a smile.

She had this suitcase, and if at this precise moment she seemed indifferent to me, upsetting, now I get that it was her way to protect herself, to stay calm. I didn’t help her to bring her things, as back then I thought that she was totally fine with those.

“How can I call you ?” I asked, with a irritated tone in the elevator. It was impossible at that time, that I would call her by her name. After all, Hyuna was the name of the girl I loved, the one I loved to whisper endlessly during the act. It wasn’t at all one name that I wanted to use awkwardly to a total stranger.

“Moon Hyuna.” She repeated, thinking that I forgot her name.

“Let’s make it clear : Hyuna is my beloved girlfriend’s name, you’re just … Moon, okay ?”

She was shocked if I believed her face change of expression, and replied “ You have a girlfriend ?”

“Huh, the mighty and cutest one, Kim Hyuna.” I said with a jerky tone. formed an “o” and she stayed silent the whole night.

Since that day we didn’t have a lot of conversations, first because we were both idols, this said, we were both busy people. Also I was used to talkative people , to people being annoying with monopolizing the conversation, like the members of B.A.P. Moon didn’t talk until it was necesarry. She sang a lot in her room but with me, I was always the first one speaking. And I wasn’t myself a talkative person, so our dinners were weird, until Moon decided to turn on the TV to make up for the silence.

 Until a while after, while we were eating. I had already the TV and started to eat while she was still in her room. Suddenly the silence came back, and I looked at her facing me, eyeing behing her the turned off TV.

“Bang, I’d like to ask you something.”

I stopped to eat and looked at her. Two month after, it was still so weird to hear her voice. This particular voice, a very mature one. And I guess that as she didn’t talk much, all she said seemed important and smart.

She sat in front of me, on our kitchen table and i'll repeat mysself but two moths after, it was still so weird to eat with her.

“I have two cats, and when I came to this apartment I left them in my dorm, will it bother you that I bring them here ?”

Moon never asked me anything, whether it’s money, food, time, services or whatever else. It was the first time she was daring to do that. For the first time I focused my attention on her, she seemed like a child, polite and almost terrified to this idea to ask something to an adult. It’s at this moment I realize that I was too harsh on her, that she was so afraid of me that she wouldn’t even talk to me.

“Nope. You can bring them.”

The next day, when I came back home, I was greeted with two cats, a big white cat and a slimmer one, in a brown tone. I liked them, it was easy to be kind with them , even if I hided this fact in front of Moon.

After that, I was able to see a more relaxed side of her. Moon was maternal, childish with her cats. Hoya and Moya were a way to brighten the house, to make the mood lighter between two persons that had nothing to say to each other.

“Hoya, Moya, time to eat !!” She would say, when each plate were full of food , those two animals would come and eat as much as pigs. She gave them always too much food, give them too much love.  Moon bought everything related to cats, her bags had cute cats paws on it, so does her cup to drink tea, some of her tee shirts, her jewelries, her phone case, her wallet and many others things. 

Her birthday coming, my father  kept reminding me that I must offer her something for this occasion. He believed in this union, and he appreciated Moon a lot, loving her as much as a daughter. I complied to that request and  I chose her a blanket with cute cats prints on it. My wife came back late with a soft smile on her face, until she saw me. I was tired and needed to wake up early the next day, but here I was waiting for a spouse that i didn't chose, to come home.

*

Here he was, waiting for me as I came back home. My husband was looking at me with a tired look and an almost angry one. I highly doubted that Bang would know my birthday, yet my heart fluttered when I saw the big packed thing next to him.

“Where were you ?” he asked, with a rather harsh tone.

“spending time with Namyu.”

“Namyu ?!” He asked, with a irritated tone. He seemed to forget that well, I was in a band too.

“Hmm… faster way to say Nine Muses.”  I said, trying to say it without any arrogance or showing that i was vexed. He looked at me with surprised eyes and cleared his throat.

“Anyways happy birthday.” I looked at him surprised, i didn't expected this sentence from his person. But let's stay real, it was said more by obligation than with sincerity.

“Who told you ?” I carefully asked, while sitting on the couch.

“My father kept pestering me for that, he harassed me to get you a gift all the week.”

I ignored that despicable sentence and sat in front of him. Instantly, Moya came to sit on my lap, ignoring the fact that I had a black dress on already leaving his long white hairs on it, while Hoya was trying to play with my toes. I got distracted by those two cuties and forgot Yong Guk presence.

Soon, his ringtone resoned in the room, frightening me and my cats. I realized that his ringtone was Unripe Apple from 4Minute’s Hyuna. I stared at him smiling seeing who called and before answering he said quickly, almost waving me off :

"Your gift is there !"

I bowed a little, thanking him and eyed the gift with an eyesmile, but my heart broke a little bit hearing 'Oh Hyuna, how are you doing my love ?'

I gulped and did as if he didn’t say it loudly  in the room and waited him to be on the veranda. Making sure that i didn't hear any of his mellow yet hurtful sentence, I went in my room to open my gift. This article just made me super happy. Cats always made me happy. I slept with my new blanket as well as her two cats, happy as a kid with his super cool gifts.

Hey hey, here the first chapter

I tried another way to write here, showing each point of view. And don't hesitate if this chapter confuse you, even more with Hyuna and Moon, i must have missed some places and misplaced the names. And tell me how you feel about it , i've tried to show another side of the arranged marriage, a more realistic one.

But let's stay real, arranged marriage ain't be realistic =)