“Why don’t you listen to me?”

She whispered, quietly. Dizziness hit her hard. He talked too fast, and she’s too slow to grasp his meaning. He should have let her speak. He should have stopped and listened. So, at least she had time to understand what exactly happening.

But no. He didn’t. And it all was painful. It hurt her just to think how she hurt him.

“Why don’t you try to listen to me?”

Another weak mutter came out along with her remaining energy. He had left, walking farther along with the dim light surrounded him. Sobbing quietly, she looked at his back which slowly disappeared. It was hurt, her chest was. What was this? What had she done that he became so angry? What was her fault that he turned his back like that?

… there is no future between us. Because I’m that G-Dragon like what the world believe. …

“That’s not what I said …” her voice was getting even weaker.

True. It’s better to just step back, like nothing has happened.

Like you don’t feel anything to me …

Like I don’t feel anything to you …

“I didn’t say that …”

It was really painful. Eunji began to fall, hugging her knees and crying silently. “I didn’t say that.” again she tried to speak though no one was around to listen. Maybe, it’s better like this. Letting the cold air accompanied her together with the dim street. So that no one saw the falling of Jung Eunji. So that nobody knew this pitiful side of her.

She hid her head through her arms. If somebody found this, she would be done, her career ruined, her future broke, no such thing like happy ending for her. What was her fault? If only he told more clearly. She didn’t understand a single word he’d said. The only thing that she grasped was he misunderstood everything she said.

He wasn’t that G-Dragon like everyone said. She wanted to say this but he didn’t give her a chance. If only he let her she would have corrected him. No, he wasn’t that G-Dragon, he’s that Kwon Jiyong. That certain Kwon Jiyong whose smile enlightened her, whose voice flattered her, whose gaze allured her. He’s that Kwon Jiyong who’s so kind to her, he’s a warm dragon, the gentlest dragon she ever knew. She would have said this if only he let her.

And the future … how could she talk about future when she didn’t even know his true feeling? Was it same? Did he feel what she felt? She’s just afraid, scared of being too greedy. She didn’t want to be a pitiful girl who demanded everything to the guy she loved. No, she’s not that kind of girl. But, what if she’s changed, what if her greediness led her to that path. It’s not the future she sought. Shouldn’t he let her tell this first?

You dislike that feeling?

“How can you say that? … No, I love you … I truly love you.”

How could he just go without even listening to this sentence?

It’s so painful, her chest was still. Even taking a deep air felt so painful. And cold, like it hated her, blamed her. Why it was like that?

Where was his usual sly grin? That warm voice? That gentle touch? Where was all that? She didn’t understand. What would happen next? Nothing? So, this was the end? No more midnight visit? No more seeing his chuckle? No more hi, Ji? Why?

Would he never see her again?

“I love you, you, bastard …”

….

“You do?”

____

One step, two steps and each one added weight onto his shoulder.

She’s crying! For goodness’ sake, Kwon Jiyong!

No. This was better. No more tears in the future.

Future?

… It’s not hard to picture how ugly her future if she’s tied with you. Why bother to ruin someone’s life? Chorong said and it lingered.

Ugly? Her future would be ugly, and messed, if she stayed with him, her leader believed and should he believe that too? It’s maybe true though. If … if they were together, how much hate she would gain? Why? Why they hated her when she’s the nicest girl he ever met? Where this theory came from?

But Eunji, she herself didn’t even wish a future between them. Why he had to bother to even make some reasons? They didn’t make sense. Anything between them sounded like a true delusion. Maybe Taeyang was right. Everything he felt was just a slight excitement for seeing such a nice girl next to him. Maybe what he felt was just a tiny spark which would puff away soon. Maybe … no. If Taeyang was right, why it’s so devastating when he knew her true feeling?

Her true feeling… she’s afraid, she’s afraid to be with him. All this time, he took her hand here and there was all wrong. He shouldn’t push her. What was him to do this to the person that didn’t even want a future with him?

But why? Why it’s so damn painful?

He stopped, couldn’t properly breathe. Chin was lifted, eyes opened up looking at the dark sky. Honestly, it’s more painful to remember the way she cried. She looked hurt, so hurt, and he just left. Believing that he was hurt as well. She’s broken, but he’s too, and it was so painful.

She though had Mino. Mino would heal her. A seemingly nice guy. Yes, he’s nice, Jiyong believed. An extra point that he might lose. So, he wasn’t nice too? So, Kwon Jiyong wasn’t nicer than Song Mino?

No, Kwon Jiy