Hidden in the Shadows

by jackieway

fiction, angst, depression, romance, a bit of fluff

Not only is Lee Seoyoon Sungmin's younger sister and Super Junior's head choreographer, she is also one of the most talented dancers in SM. She's trained for most of her life, but she will never have a chance to be in the spotlight, no matter how much she wants to. Until the very end, she'll always be hidden in the shadows of one of the most successful boy groups in South Korea. She may seem flawless on the outside. But she's only human, and she's far from perfect. She goes through what everyone else does, only many times worse: Blood. Sweat. Tears. Betrayal. Heartbreak. Depression. Self-harming. But at the end of the dark tunnel of depression that is her daily life, there is also love. Love for a member of Super Junior who helps her find herself again.

Title: 9/10

The title is very original where it gives off a mysterious feel to it. What's "hidden in the shadows?" Even though it was original, it's not eye catching. 

Story Description: 9/10

It was an appropriate detailed summary where it gave enough for the reader to yearn for the story more. The only reason why I took off points was because the way you worded some sentences. I could understand it, but only when I reread it more. 

Graphics: 5/5

Grammar / Vocabulary: 18/20

As far as I can tell, the grammar in here was superb. I just want a little more use of vocabulary to bring the story more. This may be my taste in writing and reading, but I want “show, not tell” in the story. Simply stating sentences tends to be boring, so bring all of the senses together to bring the reader in the story itself.

Story plot: 20/25

I really like the way in which you brought your story to life by adding a little drama and putting in the right amount of emotions needed. Everything was thought out and well paced. Although to me it seemed like a typical kpop trainee fanfic, I liked how it was realistic in its conflict and slowly added in the romance. However I've noticed that around the end of the story, it starts to break apart and become a little predictable between Seoyoon and the other characters. 

Characterization: 10/10

Each character was developed nicely where each of them have a different distinct personalities that balance each other out. This helped a lot because it made the characters easy to remember. 

Creativity: 9/10

Overall Enjoyment: 8/10

Overall Grade: B