[Rv] Miss Saitō's Wedding
❂ The Forgotten Phoenix ❂ : Review + Advertisement ShopMiss Saitō's Wedding by YakiManduUnicorn
Genre: Drama, Romance
Description: Miss Saitō Suzume: much known as a refined, well-cultivated young lady belonging to the prosperity, luxury, and richness of a noble family. She lives in the grandest of homes, wears many fine kimonos and western dresses, sumptuously vacations abroad, thrives in manners and etiquette, and she could easily trace her ancestory back to hundreds of years ago. Suzume is also known to be very temperate to the likes of her dear parents and especially to her beloved grandfather, Saitō Makoto, the current prime minister. If anything, she naturally felt it necessary to bring honour and always please her grandfather to be a grandchild worth his while.
Marriage was a topic that was regularly brought up by Suzume's mother although Suzume herself did not like to discuss it very much. Each time it was brought up, it was normally pardoned. Nonetheless, as Lady Suzume edged on to her twenty-fourth year of living, her mother could not stand not having grandchildren of her own. Thus, an arrangement was formed, and with the help of Grandfather Makoto, he had chosen a young groom worthy for his blossoming granddaughter from the Japanese navy.
However, Suzume's heart was somewhere else. Her heart belonged to a man by the name Byun Baekhyun, someone she cannot have for herself without bringing shame to the people around her. Now, she goes through the conflict wanting to please her peers or bring happiness to herself.
Title: 9/10
The title already told me that there's going to be a wedding, but it doesn't give any other information away. It was short and simple but to the point.
Story Description: 7/10
The description was really long. I know that the description describes the story but your description just seems too descriptive. You could have said some of the information in the description in your story. The description should be short but also informative. Maybe around four sentences?
Character Description: 0/0
There was no character description. The character grade will not be included with the overall grade.
Graphics: 4.5/5
Grammar / Vocabulary: 25/25
I don't think I found any grammatical errors in this story. Your vocabulary usage was excellent by the way. It really pulls Suzume to be seen as an elegant woman. Your description through out the story was able to form a well-detailed picture in my mind. My favorite part had to be Suzume being dressed up in her crimson kimono and her golden hair pin.
Story Line / Content: 25/25
I'm not sure how the fanfic will play out since there is only two chapters, but what I've read so far impressed me. You have a really nice pace through out the chapters. Based on past experiences reading arrangement marriages, I was a little bit worried about clichés but you really pulled through and proved me wrong. Hopefully your future chapters will do the same.
Overall Enjoyment: 20/20
I already said this but I'll say it again, your writing blew me away. I'll watch out for your future chapters. Just keep on writing!
Overall Grade: A+
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