DAY 31

I grab my wrist watch at the table while I look at myself at the mirror. I wear the watch on wrist and make my hair look proper. I look at my pale restless face and exhale a deep breathe. My phone beeped. It's my mom. 

"Hello, mom."
"Where are you right now?"
"My house."
"Still? How long you want me to wait up for you?"
"I'm on my way. Order whatever meal you want. I'll pay." I said and end the calls.

It's sound cold. Yes, I know. That is how I suppose to treat her. She abandoned me when I was young. She leave me to my dad. I don't know whose fault and I don't want to know. My dad married twice and my mom asked for divorced then she ran away. After a few years, she appeared back as a maid in my house using me as the reason while I know what she really want. Money. My dad was penniless when they were divorced and now, my dad's wallet will never empty. My dad said that he just feel pity towards my mom so he let her live in the house even though as a maid. That's why, I got my own house. I feel so ashamed towards my step family because of my mom's behaviour.

I'm heading the cafe that I've asked my mom to wait me up there. I set all the plan today. I meet her here because my dad told me that mom once again ran away from the house after she took his money. Where do I should put my ashamed face when confront my step family?

"You are here?" she greeted me as I take a sit in front of her.

"Where have you been?" I asked her.

"What's bring you to meet me?" she asked me back, change the topic.

"Why are you hesitate to answer my question?"

"You did it too."

"Because you didn't answer me."

"It's not important to answer."

"Well, am I ever be important to you?" I asked, smirked.

I could hear her sighed.

"If we here to urgued about this crap, I'm going first." she said and standing up, starts to walk away.

"I'm getting married." I said and her step stop. 

"Leave if you want. It's good since I've told you." I said and she take her sit back.

"When?"

"Soon."

"With whom?"

"With someone that no one know."

"Did your dad know about this?"

"No."

"Why you tell me first?"

"To make sure you won't make a mess on my ceremony weds."

"When will you stop make me feel hurt?"

"When you stop make me fell ashamed for all your doings."

"You know nothing."

"Then let me know."

She went into silence and stand from her sit.

"Text me later about your wedding." she said and walked away. 

I don't know why but my eyes drop the tears off. Suddenly, I see a hand give me a handkerchief. I take the handkerchief and wipe my tears before take a look at the person. It's Joonmyeon. "It's too harsh." he said. "So you hear it." I said, stop from crying. 

"I never know about your parents but I told you all. Why?"

"Because it's ashamed."

"Ashamed of what? For having a mom like that? She's still your mom. She must have her own reason."

"Reason? Even if she got one, I still bear all of her doings."

"But she's still your mom."

"Yes, she's my mom but I never be her daughter." I said and stand from my sit.

"Where are you going?"

"Somewhere. Don't into my business." I said and he grab my wrist.

"Come with me." 

"Why would I?"

"Because everything happen for a reason."

I got no strength to stop him and I just follow his step towards his car. "Where are we going?" I asked after a few minutes got into silence. "Hospital." he said. I could read his face full with anger so I just take a look at the scenery of moving car on the road. I stares it blankly as my mind catch up my last night dream. Why I only got 70 days from my death? How can the paper for my last quotes had been sworn? How can I choose this nonsense for myself? Am I also have been curse?

We are heading the hospital with his hand still grabbing my hand. I don't know why he looks so angry with me. What I have done, though? Is it just because of my mom? He walks me towards his father department which is cancer department. "Why you take me here?" I asked him but no respond. He finally stop his steps and let my hand go. "What's gotten into you?" I asked him. "I suppose ask you that." he said and walk towards the patient's register conner. He talks to the nurse and the nurse take out some files and hand it to Joonmyeon. He walks towards me while hold my hand slowly. "Follow me." he said and I follow his step. What's going on? I really don't get a thing. We both studies in medical course but I was in pharmacy part. It's only some classes that we have to take it together since it still in medical course. Then, why he brought me here? 

After a few minutes walk, he stop his step and let my hand go and he continue a few steps. There are a lot of rooms. But he stands in front of the pancreas cancer check-up room. There's a big transparents sound proof mirror that can let anyone see what the doctors did inside the room. He look at me and hand me a file. I take a few steps and take the file from his hand. I read the file front page.

Patient's Analise of Cancer Medical Check-up

The type of cancer; Pancreas cancer. 
Patient name; Choi Sungjoo.
Cancer's level; 3

My tears drop from my eyes without I realize. My hands lose its strength to hold the file. I look at Joonmyeon and he walks closer me. I could see his eyes already drop its water. "You should tell me earlier about your mom so I could recognize her at the first place." he said and I was speechless. My legs feel so weak to stand. Joonmyeon hold my shoulder from fall down and he put me slowly on the waiting bench. He hold my hand. "It's okay to cry a loud. I'm here." he said. I lean on his shoulder and cry as loud as I can. I could feel his hand caress my back slowly. I know that cancer got no cure. Patient only can rely their life on medicine or surgery to stay alive. But the surgery also doesn't effect too much. It's only live slow-taken. "Your mom did a surgery once when she was at level 2. It's about 4 months ago. My father said that she didn't take her medicine consistently so the cancer level up." he explained as my eyes stop flows its water. "That's why, she took dad's money and ran away again." I said. "I told you, everything happened for a reason." he said while lean a kiss on my forehead. "My mom got no money to bought her medicine. It's really expensive." I said. "Your mom will be just at this hospital. She don't have a lot of time. So let's be just appriciate everything, okay?" he said and I nodded. "That's my soojunghan." he said and kiss me on my forehead while tighten his hug. At this time, I only have to learn to accept everything that might and will happen soon. 

I don't know where am I. It's all grey and its full with sharp steel and thorn-like metal on the floor and wall that make me couldn't move even a step. One step if I take, I know I'll get hurt. "Soojung," I heard Joonmyeon's voice scream out my name. I turn back and he's there... stick on the wall. I could see there are a lot of thorn-like metal and sharp steel that cut and tear up every inch of his skin. "Help me..." he cries. He eyed me a move wall that comes closer to him slowly. I can't think anything and I run towards him. Suddenly I couldn't move a step. My eyes formed its water as I feel the pain on my legs. I look at my legs. My legs... with the flow blood and I could see my legs vein and something like meat and bone's pieces. There's no even leave any piece of skin. Its all covered by blood. My legs now all destroy like I was blending my own legs and the wall move closer to Joonmyeon as I heard his screamed my name. I don't know what is it and what to do but crying for nothing. Not because of the pain of my legs or Joonmyeon, but.... "GAMES ON!!!!"