”I didn’t choose you, my heart did.”

-unknown-

Is this our first quarrel? Yonghwa asked inwardly as he turned left his car, entered the parking lot of his office building.

After the reunion incident, Joohyun acted coldly to him. Not so obviously, but he could feel it. She tried to act like nothing happened but her aura showed otherwise. And every time Yonghwa tried to talk about that day, she would avoid it right away.

He knew that Joohyun could be really stubborn. She wouldn’t talk much about what in her mind. She would choose to silence if she had a problem. And it made him desperate.

He didn’t know, since when he demand her trust above of all. He felt that her trust was an important point for him.

“I knew it would be like this if Hongki hyung butted in.” Jungshin stated after Yonghwa told him what had happened yesterday. Yonghwa really needed other point of view to give him an opinion, especially about Joohyun’s personality. He couldn’t ask Yoona because she always stared coldly to him, or Minhyuk when he didn’t close with him at all. So he decided to ask Jungshin. He was still her best friend during their High School days after all.

“He really wishes you’ll end up together with Shinhye noona.” Jungshin added. “But if Joohyun act coldly to you, it’s mean that she feels really uncomfortable with what happened.” Jungshin said as he munched his pasta.

“I knew that already, Jungshin-ahh. But that‘s not my point, you babbo!” Yonghwa exasperated as he hit Jungshin head lightly.

It succeed make Jungshin chuckled so he needed to place his fork in the end.

“Okay, I’ll try to give you an opinion, but not as her best friend, Hyung. I’ll try to tell you my neutral opinion first.” Jungshin started as he looked so serious this time.

“I think you need to make a priority, Hyung. I know exactly that Shinhye noona is your best friend. It’ll be easier if you and Shinhye noona never have a feeling for each other… “

“It’s not like that, Jungshin-ahh,” Yonghwa tried to argue.

“Don’t deny it, Hyung. Everyone who knows you will tell the same thing as me.” But Jungshin replied back sternly. It succeed make Yonghwa silenced.

Jungshin didn’t continue right away. He waited Yonghwa to argue back. But when Yonghwa chose to silence, Jungshin continued, “As I told you before that it’ll be easier if your relationship with Shinhye noona is a pure friendship. But the fact is not like that. I don’t know how you feel toward her now, but let’s face the fact here, you’re a married man now. You have a wife. I don’t know how you feel toward Joohyun too. But if you continue like this, you’ll always hurt both of them. It’s not fair for them, Hyung. So, you have to choose. Take your priority.”

Yonghwa stunned by Jungshin advice at first. But in the end, he took a deep breath, agreed with what Jungshin had said to him.

“In the end you’ll end up hurting one of them, but it’s inevitable,” Jungshin added as he patted Yonghwa’s shoulder lightly. “I know it’s really difficult for you. But don’t take too long. Two hearts are waiting for you decision, Hyung.”

Yonghwa kept in silence when Jungshin decided to end his explanation as he continued his lunch.

Do I really need to choose? But Shinhye and I are never been in that kind of relationship. Yonghwa said inwardly.

“And I’ll tell you my advice as Joonhyun’s best friend now.” Jungshin added abruptly. “As so we know, Joohyun is an A type. She wouldn’t tell everything what bothered her mind, especially to you as her main problem. Joohyun and you are so similar for this point. So, my advice is you should try to open your feeling to her first. If you feel sad or disappointed or angry, just tell her. Explain the reason why you feel that way too. Don’t force her to talk about something that makes her uncomfortable. According to my experiences as her best friend, she will opened her heart too and tell her feeling slowly after we poured our feeling first.”

Is that so? But how can I tell her about what I feel when she always avoided me all the time?

“This Saturday is Joohyun’s birthday. Just prepare something special for her, Hyung!” Jungshin added again.

Yonghwa didn’t reply him but he created his own idea in his mind.

***

Joohyun took a deep breath as she looked at her laptop monitor. It was an invitation e-mail of international conference. Yes, she had to attend the international conference in Jeju this Saturday.

“So, you won’t celebrate your birthday with your husband?” Yoona asked as she sat beside her.

“I don’t know, Unnie. But I feel so relieved because of this. I don’t know how to do if we celebrate my birthday together.” Joohyun replied so honestly.

Yoona pouted her lips as she read the email from Joohyun laptop. “But the conference will hold in Saturday, it’s mean you don’t have to…”

“No, Unnie. I’ll stay there until Sunday.” But Joohyun cut Yoona suggestion off right away.

“Hyunnie-yahh…” Yoona tried to persuade her. But Joohyun shook her head sternly.

“I just don’t want you regret it later,” Yoona added.

“You may think I’m so childish, Unnie. But I need a time and space. I’m afraid I can’t control my expression in front of him.” Joohyun replied stubbornly.

It succeed make Yoona clucked her tongue. “So stubborn, as always,” she commented, “I don’t remember you can make a strange expression except that poker face. Don’t try to make an excuse Joohyun-ahh, you’re not afraid you can’t control your expression, you’re just afraid you can’t control your own feeling. Just admit it Joohyun-ahh.”

“Admit? What do you mean, Unnie?” Joohyun asked back, innocently.

“Just admit it that you’re jealous of Park Shinhye.”

Am I….?

***

Yonghwa drove his car toward the Coex World Trade Center. He just heard about Marco Polo restaurant that had the best night time view in all of Seoul. It might be sounded so cheesy but he wanted to ask Joohyun to have a romantic dinner with him in her birthday night.

He wished he could make clear all misunderstandings between them.

He prepared a special gift for her too. So after he booked the dinner at Marco Polo, he visited Tiffany & Co. store to find the gift.

But he was so confused. His relationship with Joohyun was not close enough for him to know her taste. But after several minutes he walking around the store and asking so many things to the sales girl, he finally chose to buy two similar gold Aloma's Sleek bracelets for her and himself. It would be their couple bracelets.

Don’t worry about her reaction. The main point is sincerity. Yonghwa said inwardly, as if he wanted to cheer himself.

After he finished his purchase, he walked out of the store.

He didn’t know that there was a pair of eyes that watched over him since he entered the store.

***

Friday morning, Joohyun prepared the breakfast as she always did. Her communication with her husband was not getting better. And it was always her who avoided him. She felt so guilty toward him but she needed a time and space. She decided to try to talk to him after the conference.

“Ahh, I wonder why you woke up so early,” Yonghwa who just finished his preparation before he went to work, said abruptly. It surprised Seohyun who was drowning in her own thought.

“Ahh, ne~” Joohyun replied as she stuttered a bit.

Seohyun put a cup of coffee on the table in front of Yonghwa. She took a deep breath, before she finally said, “I’m sorry Oppa for telling you late, but today I have to go to Jeju and stay there until Sunday.”

Yonghwa, who was sipping his coffee, choked by Joohyun sudden information.

“What? For what?” He asked back as he reached the tissue.

“I have to attend the international conference there. I’m sorry because I tell you just now.” Joohyun explained it further as she tried to maintain her own expression.

She waited. But Yonghwa didn’t reply anything. So she looked at Yonghwa who just stared at her.

“Wae – yo…Oppa?” Joohyun asked as she became hesitate.

Joohyun thought he was angry, but his eyes showed…a disappointment?

But wae? Seohyun asked inwardly.

Yonghwa took a deep breath, before said, “Did you do this in purpose?”

“Ne~?” Joohyun confused by Yonghwa sudden question.

“Why you didn’t tell me earlier? And why you don’t ask my permission first?” Yonghwa asked again, her tone sounds deep. He looked angry at that time. “Do you ever see me as your husband, Joohyun-ahh?”

What? Joohyun shocked by Yonghwa last question.

“What – do you mean, Oppa?” Joohyun asked back, confused.

Yonghwa didn’t answer it right away, he still stared at her.

“I think you don’t…” he answered it himself.

“What?” Joohyun more confused.

“You decided to attend that conference without ask my permission first. You avoided me and refused to hear my explanation.” Yonghwa said in disappoint tone. “You…never trust me in the first place, don’t you?”

Joohyun looked so speechless at first.

I admit for his first sentence. But the rest…how can he accuses me when he, himself, didn’t do something that make me trust him in the first place too? And he said that I never see him as my husband?

It took a while until she got the courage to reply him.

“You said that you will support my career, Oppa. I thought you’ll allow me to go as long as it’s a business trip. But I’m sorry if I hurt you by decided to go without ask your permission first.” Joohyun started.

“And I admit that I avoided you these several days. I’m sorry but I need a time and space. I hope you’ll understand me.” Joohyun added. It was not a wise choice to argue him back.

“If it’s the problem, why you didn’t try to tell me about this earlier? Does it too difficult for you to tell me that you just need a time or space? Why you kept in silence? How can I understand you, if you didn’t tell me?” Yonghwa argued back.

The situation became more complicated. Yonghwa looked so emotional.

Joohyun really wanted to argue back too, but she took a deep breath again. “I’m sorry if my childish act offended you, Oppa. But let’s talk again after I back from Jeju, when our minds are calm.”

There is no point to argue him. Joohyun told to herself.

“Okay, if you said so. But let me tell you one thing, Joohyun-ahh. Trust is a basic foundation of our marriage. And you, obviously aren’t trust me. I’ll never be a good husband for you if you keep thinking that way.” Yonghwa stated as he got up and reached his blazer.

Joohyun closed her eyes as she screamed inwardly. Why he talk as if it’s all my mistakes?

“I’ve tried, Oppa. I’ve tried to trust you. It’s you who didn’t do something that makes me trust you.” Joohyun couldn’t hold her anger anymore. “And how come you accuse me not see you as a husband because of that?”

But Yonghwa smiled bitterly. “You even didn’t try to hear my explanation back then…” He stated again as he walked away, left Joohyun who cried soundlessly.

***

Yonghwa slumped himself into the car as he banged the door hard. Feeling frustrated by his wife last statement.

He suddenly remembered