It's Okay, Love is Like This Sometimes
Children of the Night
Play, Listen & Read
The car ride couldn't have been more than twenty minutes, not with the abrupt turns consisting of short cuts and dirt roads. My stomach got accustomed to the rugged paths but it was when we reached a concreted path my stomach was thrown off again. It was the main strip of road that led into the cities and towns, escaping the rural farmlands to modern suburbia.
"He'll be glad to see you," Yixing mumbled to himself as he transferred from one lane to the other. "Especially you."
I could already feel a flustered blush powder my cheeks but I had no control over that, unfortunately; I can't save myself from my own self-embarrassment. "I would be just as glad to see him." As my eyes scanned outside of the window, they found a grocery store where I could purchase a little something filled with such sympathy. "Hey, pull over here." The tip of my index finger mashing into the glass of the window to display the location.
He pulled into the deserted lot, not even a single soul roamed outside the store and from the looks of it, I doubt the fact of the store being possibly mobbed. As he placed the car in park, I simultaneously yanked at the handle and exited the vehicle; shutting the door behind me.
I was greeted by some employees as I did the reciprocal, giving them warm smiles of appreciation. Swiftly, I jerked to my left as I discovered the bouquet stand down the isle, flowers entrapped in a glass case where I suppose they retained them misted regularly. With my best judgement, I selected the bouquet with several species of flowers: roses, baby breath's, lilies, and other scattered greenery that I couldn't recall off the top of my head. I made my way to the check out counter where quickly paid my fee and scurried out of the building, the more time I consumed in here the more time I have less with him.
"I got them," I stated as I settled into the passenger seat once again. The ruffling of the plastic that kept the flowers contained I found rather pleasant and brought flashbacks as to when my mother and I purchased flowers for the house; a sudden nostalgia washing over me. Shaking my head, I laid the flowers gently against my lap to secure them.
"They're pretty, he'll love them."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Just through that door," a busty doctor directed me to the first room on the right side of the hallway we were currently standing in.
"Thank you so much," I slightly bowed my head to him, wrapping the bouquet closer to my body. I don't know what got into me but suddenly I was anxious to see him again, alive, breathing, view his condition; I don't know what it was but it was contradicting everything I was being brave and courageous for.
Yixing abandoned me to search for his father, for he visited Yifan once before to deliver medicine here. I didn't mind though, Yixing probably never saw his father as often as an average teenage boy should, plus it allowed more alone time between us both.
My heels clanked against the floor, another noise that I was alert of besides the distinct beeping of the heart monitor next to his bed. I approached him slowly, incredibly slow that it almost hurt to breathe, silently and not giving my presence away. I wanted to stare at his sleeping state for a little while longer, a few seconds that would stumble into minutes but I knew I shouldn't be selfish.
"Usually the guy buys flowers for the girl, but I guess this is different."
His eyes peeled, gawking intently at the ceiling in what seemed to look like confusion, astonishment, and a hint of disbelief. "But I guess we weren't the usual couple anyways." I dryly laughed, at least I thought it was ironic that the roles have altered.
"Jaewa," his hoarse voice cracked the brief stillness and silence of the both of us. "You're here."
"I wouldn't miss it for the world."
He had stammered something about a remote control and I supposed he meant he wanted the bed to be propped so we could converse for a bit. I did as he rhetorically requested, our bodies dangerously close as they once were that I almost lost my self-containment.
"Thank you," he shuffled under the sheets, concealing his arms that were patched up with multiple tubes. "How have you been?"
"I think I should be asking that, how do you feel?"
Though he was out for not even a month, he appeared a lot paler and scrawny than I recalled, his cheekbones and jawline were more prominent due to the weight loss; but nonetheless, he was still attractive physically and internally and my Yifan no matter what.
"I feel a lot better now that you're here." He glanced at the item in my fierce grasp, out of a nervous manner at least.
"Oh, these," I inspected them as well, suddenly at a loss for words. Searching, scanning, was my vocabulary not broad enough to throw and mash words together? My word bank was snatched and I had no idea what to place in the crossword puzzle, time was ticking but the puzzle was set aflamed before I could even land a finger on it.
"Are they for me?" A tone in his voice- admiration and heart-warmed- created a wonky and irregular beat that my heart was repeating.
I handed them over to him, so he could smell the roses, literally, and have full possession of my thought for him. A gradual tug of his lips displayed his grin, not just any smile but the one that showcased his sincere happiness. I took a seat next to his bed- which was no further than a handful of inches- tucking the ends of the dress under my legs to not risk any humiliation.
"Thank you," his attention swapped several times from the flowers to me, flowers, me, me, until he was gazing into me with those eyes that I couldn't escape from or describe for the most part; orbs that reflected so much life and innocence that it was nearly impossible to pry my attention from.
Another awkward giggle emitted from me, which made him laugh as well, it was just different that how much time we were used to being around each other flourished and we weren't seeing each other frequently like it had been years. It felt like centuries since we last spoke to each other, something that I always thought upon during long evenings when I couldn't slip into a slumber.
"You look beautiful," his eyes roamed over me, my heart spazzing out once again. "You always do."
"Thank you." I involuntarily covered my cheeks. "I wanted to look pretty."
"All this for me?" He laughed, wholeheartedly. "Maybe I should be sick more often."
"Don't say that!" I smacked the air, hopefully swatting that statement away so it wouldn't be jinxed. "I missed you too much."
"Oh, did you?" He rested his chin on the palm of his hand, a fabricated amazement tying his features together. "It doesn't seem like it."
"I really did," I glanced down at my lap, my finger knotting and picking at the leather of my purse. "It was kind of hard to not to see you every day, especially since I was so used to it. That was also the scariest part."
"I'm here now, I'm living for you, because of you."
I obtained a steady expression to not shatter into a sob and retained my tears from spilling. "Thank God, honestly." I dared to confront him, his eyes, as his darted to mine. He complimented me for the second time, saying that he wished that he took me out on more dates but I waved his thought away with a chuckle. "When are we going home.. together?"
He hesitated, not exactly placing his finger on a definite response, there wasn't a response so sure of itself. His expression grew slightly sullen, he desired to hold me just as much I desired the same.
"In a bit, we have to wait awhile before I can get better. But anywhere you are I am home."
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