I am not fine.

Thankfully, Kris was still practicing so I have time for myself to let everything out. It was hard letting Yixing go, now that he mentioned his longing for me. If only that didn’t happen, we would still be here ling each other while murmuring soft love whispers enough to melt someone’s heart.

Right now, my heart is too cold due to both of the weather and Yixing’s absence. Yes, I admitted it. I want Yixing back but it’s not that easy.

So I decided to just go out and talk a stroll, forgetting every worry that’s bothering me. I should’ve accepted Luhan’s offer earlier but it’s fine. I could just pick up some fish cake from the road.

The weather was indeed cold, below 0 degrees. I didn’t wear muffins and I was starting to regret the decision of going out because it was freezing and I had nowhere to go. I stopped by a bakery and bought a slice of cheese cake and coffee for Kris. He would love to come home seeing this later.

The roads were still busy at this kind of hour. The sudden growls from my stomach made me realize that I hadn’t have dinner yet. Wondering what I should eat, a certain restaurant caught my eye. Sushi sounded delicious for the moment. The waiter greeted me as I walked in to find a perfect table, maybe close to the window because I would be delighted to enjoy both the scenery and my favorite food. Menu was handed for me but I didn’t have to scan through because Sashimi and Udon was my regular.

Not far away, I spotted a familiar figure at the register, waiting for his service. Zooming onto his face, it was that boy from dance club. Kim Jongin, if I was not mistaken. I see him often at school but I’ve never spoken a word to him before. Perhaps it’s because I was shy, or he was too much of a low profiled person.

He was certified a talented dancer because everyone could tell from the way he moves. It’s just so artistic and intriguing that lured your attention of wanting more from him. He was quite famous amongst juniors because he is one as well.

Jongin looked troubled when he fumbled his pockets and talked to the waiter. It seemed that the house was packed and he had nowhere to sit. Poor dude. The waiter asked him to wait for a little bit and my order came in right just in time. After all the thoughts about Jongin, I almost forgot of my hunger.

While I was chewing the sashimi, a voice caught my attention. I looked up to see Jongin staring back at me with a pained look. “Uhh, may I sit here?”

“Yes... sure,” it was not intended but what’s the loss of declining? So Jongin took his seat with a small smile on his face. It was influential because I was smiling also. “Thank you, senior,” he bowed slightly but I stopped him. There’s no need for respect outside of school. This was the first time I talked and actually gotten close to the latter. He had always been so quiet and mysterious at school, dancing as if it was another language that he understood.

“I saw you a lot at school,” I broke the ice in between us, “You’re really good. Kim Jongin, right?”

Jongin nodded, as expected, I guessed it right. No one can resemble this handsome face. Dark hair and slightly tanned skin that made him look attractive and kind of y. His wide smile was a rare trademark and I should be thanking the heavens for letting him smile for me despite our relation.

I introduced myself to him and he said he saw me a lot also. Maybe it’s because I’m one of the members. Jongin took his order and our conversation travel deeper.

“I guess you like sushi,” I said, finishing my udon. Jongin’s food hasn’t arrived yet so we had to talk to reduce the awkwardness. “That explains why I was so desperate until I sat with you,” he chuckled. Strange, how charming he looked when he smiles. “I like sushi too,” I revealed. I don’t know, I just thought that it might be a nice sentence to say for now.

“I’ve always wanted to talk to you,” Jongin spoke, “Finally found out who exactly Sarah Wu was.”

“I’m that popular?” I blurted and Jongin laughed loudly this time. I wondered what’s so funny that made him so bubbly and active like this. “Yeah, you’re the talk of the juniors. They’d nicknamed you as ‘pretty noona’ as well.”

I had to admit that I heard that a lot. Beautiful genes run in my family since my parents were attractive as well as my brother Kris who was everyone’s eye candy. I got used to compliments because I receive them everyday like oxygen. “Wow, I guess I should go and visit the junior world then,” I joked and Jongin broke into a soft chuckle.

“Thanks for everything, senior, you’re a nice person,” A sweet line from Jongin, it was enough to melt my cold heart. “Come on, just call me noona.”

“As you say, noona.”

Jongin’s order arrived pretty late and we were too absorbed in our talk until we forget that an hour has passed. The story about Jongin’s puppy was paused halfway as he excused himself to eat. “His name is Monggu and he’s the only son I have.”

“You said you raise two, where’s the other one?”

“Jjanggu passed away a few months ago. It was horrible, I know. But everything comes and goes, right?”

Yixing. I was concerned once again. “I’m sorry,” apologizing to Jongin since I knew there’s a hint of sadness beyond his eyes. There was a long silence after that as the latter consumes his Japanese food while I watch the outside view. The snow was increasing and there were still many people walking to and fro. A ringtone broke the silence and it was Jongin’s. He placed his chopsticks on top of the table as he picked the phone.

“Ah, Sehun? I’ll be there, ok, bye.”

After the call, Jongin quickly finished his sushi and got up. “I’m sorry but I have to go right now, my friend needs me.”

I gave him permission to go and Jongin thanked me for that. He pulled out some money from his wallet and handed it to the waiter. “I’ll be treating, thank you pretty noona.”

For crying out loud, Jongin’s really a gentleman. The waiter gave him the receipt and Jongin waved at me before going out. Maybe dinner wasn’t so bad after all.