Sorry My Friend , i have to stole this Baekyeol gif from your wall. Just blame yourself for putting too much Baekyeol on your wall,it's killing me. Thanks. ^^

► Heartache.

He didn’t know that sometimes,it’s really hard to catch a breath. But,when he saw Chanyeol and Luhan together,day by day,Baekhyun can felt that. He don't know why. It’s not that  he didn’t try to fight with his feelings,but its really hard to ignore it when he will saw them together every day. Today,Chanyeol invite Luhan to lunch with them at their table. Baekhyun felt tired and it’s really hard for him to continue showed them a fake smile. He felt that he will cry anytime. So,he just stay silent and focus with his mission,eat his lunch without left anything.

" Luhan,I always saw you alone. Did you didn’t have any friends, I mean,best friend?" Kyungsoo asked Luhan.

" Yeah..I..I don't know. Looks like everyone don't want to be my friends. You know, there’s one day,I went to the toilet. When I was inside,I heard someone talk about me with his friend. They called me…” He paused. “… . They also said that I will seduce anyone I want to get err…you know…that things.” Luhan paused again. He take a deep breath.  “ I'm not like that. It's not my fault if those boys  try to ask me out,right? I've never go out with them,though." Luhan looked sad.

 " But you make it with Chanyeol at last." Jongin interrupt with a stupid grin on his face

Luhan just shook his head. Chanyeol smiled.

" Sometimes,I feel really jealous at you guys. You have friends,who always with you,no matter what happen. Most of time, i really jealous at Baekhyun. He can get new friends easily. I've tried to be a bubbly person like him but it's hard to become another person,right?"

Baekhyun lift his head when he heard someone mention his name. 

' He talked about me?'

He looked at Luhan with his confused face. 

Luhan nodded.

“ Yes,I envy  you. Actually,I want to be your friend since we’re in grade one. But I’m afraid to asked you.Besides,Kyungsoo always with you. I don’t want to be a third wheel.”

Baekhyun just rub his neck while he tried to think the best words to answer Luhan.

“ Err..Kyungsoo is my best friend since kindergarden. That’s why I always with him. You can be my friend too. I didn’t mind.”

Luhan smiled. “ Really?”

Baekhyun nodded.

“ Yeah… But I think he can’t be your friend,Luhan.” Chanyeol interrupt with his poker face.

“ Why?” Luhan ask.

“ Because he’s a dwarf. He’s small,fat,eats a lot,little,short and..” Chanyeol whispered to Luhan but it’s loud enough to make the others heard that.

 “…he’s crazy.”

' .'

“ Yah,! I can hear what you tell him,you idiot! Don’t listen to him,Luhan. He just got jealous with me.” Baekhyun said while he throw a broccoli at Chanyeol.

Kyungsoo’s eyes widened. “ Yah! Byun BaekHyun! Don’t play with food. You’re wasting them! I always remind you that!”

Baekhyun want to apologise but he cancelled his intention when Chanyeol throw him a slice of meat,with his grin at his face.

“ Yah! Park ChanYeol! You too! Don’t waste it!” Kyungsoo looked angry.

Chanyeol and Baekhyun ignore him while they keep throwing anything in front of them to each other. A carrot,slice of cheese,chocolate chip cookies,spoon,fork and a plastic cup just flying freely in front of them. Luhan and Jongin just laughed at their childish behavior.

“ I’m done with both of you!” Kyungsoo stood up angrily and leave all of them,dumbfounded.

“ Looks like my baby was angry..” Jongin said.

“ This is all your fault,! You’re really annoying,I swear!” Baekhyun stood up and followed Kyungsoo.

Chanyeol just let out a small laugh and he turn at Luhan.

“ Am I right,Luhan? He’s crazy..”

Luhan shook his head.

“ You two are impossible.”

Baekhyun walk fastened while he tried to catch Kyungsoo’s step.

“ Kyungsoo-ah,I’m sorry. Don’t get mad at me,please? He started it first. You should just mad at him,not me. I’m your best friend,right? Kyungsoo-ah..”

Kyungsoo just ignore him and just walk straight to their class.

“ Kyungsoo-ah,please…”

Again,Kyungsoo ignore him. He just went to his place and open his Mathematics book.

“ Kyungsoo…”

Again. No response.

Baekhyun felt really sad. His best friend was mad at him. His best friend didn’t want to answered him for the first time since they became friend. He already felt sad when he looked Chanyeol with Luhan earlier. Now he have to deal with his feeling again. He could feel that his views are becoming blurred. He ran out of class and headed towards the toilet immediately.

‘ Stop it,Baekhyun. Nobody can know that you're crying. Stop it!’

Chanyeol and Jongin was on their way back to the class when they saw Baekhyun running  while he lower his gaze to the floor.

“ Hey,what happened?” Chanyeol asked Jongin.

Jongin shrugged.

“ I don’t know. Follow him and check what’s wrong.”

“ Why me?” Chanyeol asked again.

“ Because I want to check on my baby,dude. Just follow him,tried to talk with him. Go.”

Chanyeol obeyed him. He follow Baekhyun and saw the latter go to the toilet. He stood at the doorway and saw Baekhyun in front of the mirror,with his hand at his face.

‘ He’s crying?’

Baekhyun still crying,without move his hand from his face.

‘Thank God,there’s nobody inside this toilet now.’

Suddenly,he heard someone clear his throat.

‘ Oh My God. Someone’s coming!’

Baekhyun quickly opened the tap and washed his face,in order to get rid of all traces that can showed he just cried.

“ Hey.”

That voice.

Baekhyun closed his eyes.

‘ Please tell me this is a dream. Bad dream. I don’t want him to become the person to see me cry.’

“ Hey.”

‘ Okay. Just relax,Baekhyun. Answered him. Smile.’

Bakhyun turned back with a smiled at his face. A smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

“ Oh,hey. What are you doing here?” He asked Chanyeol,with his hoarse voice.

“ Why did you cried?”

‘ Bam! Oh God. He saw me cried. What to do? What to do?’

Baekhyun let out a small chuckle and shook his head.

“ What? Cried? No,I’m not. Why must I cried? It’s just..err…there’s something inside my eyes, I guess.”

Chanyeol just stare at him with his blank face.

‘ Stop giving me that look. You make me want to cried harder!’

“ Liar.”

“ Huh?”

“ You’re liar.”

“ Wha—what? Why me?”

“ You cried. I know that. I’m here since last 10 minutes. You cried.”

Baekhyun thinned his lips. He moved closer to the wall and leaned there. Again,his views become blurred.

“ You can cry if you want.”

Baekhyun inhale deeply.

And he cried.

He cried and try to lessen a pain at his heart.

Chanyeol walk towards Baekhyun and he pulled the smaller towards his arm.

“ Just cry. No need to feel ashamed. It’s just me here.”

‘ Oh God,please stop time from moving right now. Please..’

“ Kyungsoo was angry at me. Hhe…He didn’t want to talk with me. He’s the only one that I have. He’s never like that before this. I’m scared… if he didn’t want to be my friends again.”

“ It’s not like that. He just a little bit angry. Just give him time,everything will back to normal after this. It’s okay,Baekhyun.”

‘ He called me Baekhyun..again..’

“ But…”

“ Baekhyun-ah!!”

Kyungsoo suddenly come with Jongin. Chanyeol quickly let out his hold on Baekhyun.

“ Kyungsoo..I’m sorry. I—I  swear,I won’t do like that again. Please,don’t get mad at me..” Baekhyun said while he wipe his tears.

“ No,I’m sorry. I’m just pretend that I’m angry with you. I didn’t meant it. I’m sorry. Baekhyun,please don’t cry. I’m sorry..okay?” Kyungsoo said and he hugged Baekhyun.

Baekhyun just nodded and he buried his face at Kyungsoo’s shoulder.

“ Yeah..stop crying,dwarf. You look ugly.” Chanyeol suddenly said.

‘ Dwarf again?..where’s ‘Baekhyun’?’

“ Shut up,Chanyeol. Baekhyun, let’s go back to the class,okay? I’m so sorry. I promise,I will not doing that again. Let’s go.” Kyungsoo grab Baekhyun’s arm and they walk together to class,leaving Jongin and Chanyeol dumbfounded.

Jongin changed his gaze to Chanyeol when Kyungsoo already lost from his sight.

“ What?” Chanyeol asked.

Jongin smiled.

“ What? Stop smiling,you looks like a dork.”

Jongin chuckled. He shook his head.

“ I saw you hugged him.”

And he exited the toilet,leave Chanyeol alone.

Dumbfounded.

With his eyes wide open.

22 January 2013

Dear Diary…

Remember when I said that I’m afraid to like him more? Well,looks like today what I’m afraid of already become a reality. I like him a lot. And I can’t control my feelings when it involves him. I already try my best to ignore it and try hard to push this feelings away from me,but I can’t. It hurts a lot when I see him with Luhan,every day. Even they didn’t do a stupid lovey-dovey conversation like what Kyungsoo and Jongin always have or didn’t give each other pet names,it still hurt me.

 I really need someone to talk about this. And I’m sure,Kyungsoo is not the best option. No! I didn’t say that because I don’t trust him,but I can’t guaranteed that this things didn’t slip out from his mouth when he talk with Jongin. Kyungsoo and his absent-minded habit. Chanyeol cannot know about this. No.

You know,Kyungsoo-that jerk was pretend that he’s mad at me today-when I threwed a broccoli at Chanyeol. And I fall for his trick. I’m scared. I’m scared because he is the one who always on my side when I’m in trouble or I feel alone. What will happen to me if he doesn’t want to be my friend?

I have nobody. No mum,dad or siblings. That’s why I’m scared. So,I cried. I cried to remove all the sadness in my heart. The sadness that I’ve tried to remove for almost a week. The worst part is,he saw me cried. That ,no, scratch that,that Prince. Yes,he saw me.

Really,I didn’t know what I felt when he pulled me into a hug. I just hope that time will stop. I want to feel it longer. I love this side of him. He’s totally different. And he called me by my name,not ‘dwarf’ as usual. I really love the way he called me. I don’t know how to tell you,but it’s really a great feelings.

It’s weird when he just called me with my name when nobody was around us. Just when we were together. Is it really embarrassing if he mentioning my name in front of others? Is it?

a/n:

update!

guys,maybe this is my last update because i'll be on hiatus for around 2-3 months. 

i need time to recover.

but,don't worry,I'll try my best to persuade my mom,to allow me to use the computer.

so,see you again in next time. 

byebye.^^

kaylie.