I was looking up at the sky counting stars. The night is a little cold and I don’t have anything to put around me but I don’t care. I was lying in the grass, surrounded by the purple flowers. It would’ve felt like heaven but there’s something missing. There’s no one to share the moment with me.

            I was in the Sakura Garden. Coming here with my free time has been my ritual and every time I go here I am half expecting to see Toushiro, waiting for me like he used to. The place looked less happy without him but still beautiful.

           It’s been a month since he went to America and he calls every weekend, telling me stories about school and asking me how I have been. Sometimes I feel jealous that he’s so happy there because he’s learning so much and I was afraid that he wouldn’t comeback. I chastised myself every time I think about that. Sometimes he’ll call in the middle of the night to tell me that he misses me and that’s when I know that nothing’s really changed. He’s happy and I should be.

            I willed myself to get up from the grass and leave. I can’t stay here for the night. Toushiro has been so worried when he learned from Saki that I go here even at night without company. I want to save him from all the worries so I go home at exactly eight pm.

           I arrived at my house and made my usual routine. It was all like a blur until I realize I’m already in bed. I sleep without dreams ever since he went away.

             I woke up the next day feeling weird. It’s Saturday and I should have stayed longer in bed. I got out from bed and made myself some breakfast. The purple mallows were gone but the box is still inside the refrigerator.

             I sat on the sofa and I thought. Another day without him. I wonder if he’s feeling like this too. I stared out of the window and I frowned. I felt like I forgot something and that’s bad. Way bad. Ever since my memories went back I get a little worried when I forgot something. It’s freaking me out.

             The door bell rang and I answered it. I opened the door only to find that no one is there. I shut it off feeling a little pissed off. It’s early in the morning and I’m getting played at. The door bell rang again and this time I looked around but still nothing.

             “It’s not funny!” I shouted at no one and I slammed the door.

             The door bell rang again. I closed my eyes in irritation and for the third time wrenched the door open.

             “What the hell is your problem? Whoever you are!!” I shouted my eyes still closed.

             “What the hell is your problem freak?” a voice said.

             My eyes flew open and I saw Misaki’s face. “Why are you ringing my door bell again and again?”

             “What?!” she asked.

             I frowned. “My door bell rang twice but whenever I open the door there’s no one  outside.”

              Misaki laughed. “Way to freak out yourself, Tehru.”

              “I am not freaking myself out.” I smirked.

              “Yeah, whatever. Whoever rang your door bell wasn’t playing prank on you.” Misaki  said.

               “How do you know?” I asked challenging her.

               “Someone left you a package.” she pointed out.

                I looked downward and there it is. Two packages in my front door and I didn’t notice. I picked up the first box and it’s so light it might contain nothing. The second box is a lot bigger and it’s wrapped in purple with a red ribbon on top. I picked it up and it’s a lot heavier.

               “Who sent these?” I asked.

               “Duh, I just got here.” Misaki pointed out. “Can I come in now or am I not welcome?”

                “Oh sorry.” I said letting her inside.

                Misaki settled herself on the sofa and I followed her. That’s when I noticed that she’s carrying a basket with balloons tied to it and she’s also carrying a big paper bag.

               I frowned. “Why are you here so early in the morning and why do you have so many things with you?”

               Misaki looked at me like I was crazy and then she jumped up from the sofa. “Oh right. I forgot something.”

               She went outside again and when she comes back she’s holding a big square box. She went to the kitchen and put it in the table. I followed her still confused.

               “Are we having a picnic?” I asked stupidly.

               She me. “What day is it?”

               “Saturday.” I replied at once.

               “And?” she prompted.

               I stared at her. “And what?”

               She sighed and closed her eyes. I can hear her counting from one to ten. She  does that when she’s trying to stop herself from hitting me.

              “It’s your birthday!!!” she yelled at me.

               I stared at her.

               What?

               “It is?” I asked unable to believe.

               “Yes.” Saki answered impatiently.

               Great. It’s my birthday and I’ve completely forgotten about it.

              “Geez. You do forget a lot of things, huh?” Saki said opening the box.

              “I can’t believe I forgot about my birthday.” I said miserably.

              “That’s probably because you’re thinking about him too much.” Misaki said slowly like she doesn’t want to upset me.

               “What’s that got to do with my birthday?” I asked.

               Saki sighed once more. “Tehru, Toushiro said he wanted you to be happy but with what I am seeing you’re not sad but I don’t think you’re happy either. You’ve completely shut yourself down. You don’t do fun things anymore. You just go to school, to the shelter, to your work and then to that Sakura Garden and then home. Your life looks like a ritual. Toushiro said live in the present but right now I can see you living only now so that you can see the future already.”

               I stared at her blankly and my mind tried to process everything. She’s right.

               “It’s only been a month what will you do for the rest of the time you will wait? You’ve even forgotten about your birthday.” Misaki explained.

              “You’re right.” I said and I felt guilty because I know I’ve let her down. “I’m sorry.”

               “I understand but I want you to know that Toushiro is not your world. You have your own, don’t live for him. Live for yourself and one day when he comes back you’ll have to live for you and for him. I’m sure he wouldn’t want your life to revolve around him.”

                When Misaki said that I felt like I’m hearing Toushiro’s last words to me again back in the airport. I felt a tear ran down my left cheek. I’ve been so caught up on his departure and to my promise that I will wait for him that I haven’t paid much attention to what’s really happening around me and that means ignoring Misaki unconsciously.

                I suddenly wrapped my arms around her. “I’m sorry, Saki.”

                “It’s okay.” she said patting me on the back. “He worries about you.”

                “I know. I’ll do better I promise.” I said pulling away.

                Misaki nodded. “That’s the spirit.”

                “So are we going to celebrate my birthday now?” I asked wiping my tears.

                “Of course, what am I here for?” she replied smirking.

                “Just make sure my birthday cake doesn’t have the word ‘freak’ on it.” I warned her.

                 She gave me a guilty smile and opened the box. There in the middle of the cake were the words: ‘Happy Birthday, Freak!’

                 I laughed. “I should have known.”

                 To celebrate my birthday Misaki and I went out and did some shopping. We also bought food and drinks. I am so happy and I felt like I am back to normal. There’s so much I have missed. We ate the cake after dinner and then Misaki gave me her present.

                  I opened it to find a new Lolita dress inside. I squealed in delight and gave her a hug. She knows that I love Lolita dresses.

                  “Open you other gifts.” Misaki said.

                  “Huh?”

                  She rolled her eyes and pointed at the two packages that arrived earlier this morning. “Oh, right.”

                The packages were from Toushiro. The first box contained a pillow in the shape and color of a purple marshmallow and the second box contained three books and a photo album. The books were for school that Toushiro might have bought there in America and the photo album contains pictures of him with captions. What made me smile is that he’s making funny poses which he doesn’t do and every picture has a caption of Happy Birthday Tehru.

                 “He’s crazy.” I laughed.

                “He’s in love.” Misaki corrected.

                “Arigato, Saki.” I smiled.

                “Aren’t you going to call him now?” Misaki frowned.

                I shook my head. “Nah, maybe later before I sleep. Let’s continue our celebration. Want to watch a movie?”

                "It better not be The Grudge. I’ll kill you.” Misaki said.

                This is the time where I should start being a good friend. I promise to myself not to shut her out again.

A/N:

   it's not all about love you know...sometimes it's about frienship too. ^^

that's why i lovemy friends.. :)) and you who have stuck to this story till the end.. :))

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