Woohyun’s POV

         Her lips were as soft as I thought and imagined for so long. During the time I was not able to find Hyewon, when she hid from me, I found myself more than once thinking of this moment, of the moment I’d be finally able to kiss those lips that had been threatening me to kiss them so many days ago, but I had restrained because I didn’t know how did Hyewon feel towards me.

         But at that moment, I could see her eyes shining for me, though she was clearly in pain, though she seemed to be hurt but I didn’t know why. And also did I not how to make her feel better so my only thought was to kiss her and make her feel worthy of being kissed with love or cherish or what I was already feeling towards her. I didn’t know anything at that moment. I just knew that Hyewon was already too important for me and I just wanted to prolong that kiss as much as I could.

         I moved my hands to the back of her neck, to her hands and her waist when she tugged the edges of my t-shirt and kissed me back. Her lips were demanding more from mine and I just wanted to give her what she wanted. Her kiss was trembling, insecure, but I knew she wanted it because she grasped more of the fabric of my t-shirt. I kissed her deeper, threatening her teeth to make way for my tongue as they finally did and I kissed her, explored her cavern and softly her lips. I could feel the heat growing in my body as my back was feeling hot and my neck was becoming thicker.

         At that time, I haven’t realized she had already stopped kissing me, and was trying to slightly push me away, slightly asking me to climb off her. I opened my eyes just to meet a pair of eyes full of fear, anger and sadness. I felt the worst human being ever. I was almost on top of her; she was holding her body from my weight just with her elbows.

         I moved away as fast as I could, and sat again where I was before jumping over her. The awkwardness overtook the place immediately.

         “Hyewon-ssi… I’m sorry.” I rushed to say first, before she would say anything. I tried to take her hand but she rejected it, not even looking at me. “Hyewon-ssi, please… I’m sorry.” I moved to her but she slightly moved backwards, still not looking at me.

         “Nam Woohyun-ssi… please… leave…” She said, almost whispering but her words were so sharp, cold and harsh that they pierced my heart deeply. I felt tons of arrows breaking my heart into pieces but I couldn’t think of me but of what I’d done and that I didn’t deserve less.

         I looked at her for some seconds, hoping that she would look at me or say something else but she didn’t. I then had to stand up, without saying anything else as I shoed my feet and leave her flat, closing softly the door behind me.

         As I walked to my flat I was cursing myself mentally, all the time. I was really stupid. Hyewon probably would never forgive me this stupid act that I made. I was such an animal, acting by sensations, by poor animal sensations. I still felt the heat of the kiss and it made me feel even worse. I had never felt like hat kissing anyone ever, I liked that kiss too much that just by thinking about it, my heart raced immediately but it just made me worst.

         Hyewon-ssi, I’m really sorry. Please, forgive me this…

         I reached my department and sat on the edge of the bed, thinking of my stupidity. I couldn’t stop thinking of the possible side effects that this would bring me and it made me uneasy. What should I do? What on earth was I thinking? It was just our first kiss, the kiss that I hope would develop many other kisses during our story but I screwed it with big feet, as a teenager, as a pubescent who had never kissed a woman.

         But truth was that kissing Hyewon made me feel like I’d never kissed before. I felt like she was… I didn’t know how to express it. She was too much for me and kissing her made me found how important she had already became to me. I couldn’t lose her like that, not by my stupid anxious of a woman.

         What if she didn’t want to see me again? What if she slaps me? Well, it’d be better than anything. I deserved that and anything that she would want to do if it made her feel better and accept me and my apologies. I had to check it by myself so I went back to her department and knocked on her door but she didn’t answer. I knocked harder but the answer never came.

         “Hyewon-ssi, I know you’re there.” I said to the closed door but I was sure she was listening. “I know I’m a moron, a berk, a blithering idiot, everything you want to call me but please forgive me, please. It’s not what you might be thinking, I’m not that kind of man, I swear. I should’ve… not kissed you like that… I shouldn’t have kissed you… I’m really sorry…” I was getting anxious that she didn’t even come, I didn’t hear any move from behind the door when I put my ear. “Please, let’s talk, please… I… I really need you…” I found myself saying this, my heart was in pain but it sort of felt relieved when I said all that, though the pain wasn’t any lesser. “I’m not going anywhere before talking with you.” I finally said, feeling defeated. I sat on the floor, facing the door and knocked slightly. I knew she wouldn’t open but I couldn’t stop, as I repeated with every knock, “Hyewon-ssi, I’m sorry, I really am…”