Title: 4/5

Although the title was alike Alice In Wonderland, it was cute :D

(Thank you :P I normally at coming up with titles~)

Poster: 5/5

I liked the poster. It was cute, fun, and suited the story. And I liked how you had the guys all labelled and also with the small picture of the Alice in Wonderland characters, it helped me understand the story a lot. And the background was cool as well, kudos to the person who made the poster and background.

(I adore the poster and background too :D imaninjadude made them for me and they are so nicely done.)

Description/Forward: 8/10

I liked the description. It was short yet detailed and makes the readers more intrigued to start reading. The trailer was very good as well but I didn’t think you needed to have the Boyfriend MV there, it just swayed away from the fanfic. I liked the foreword as well but I thought it was so alike to Alice in Wonderland’s start that I wasn’t that interested.

(The trailer I made myself :P because Boyfriend is so new, there really wasn't much footage of all the guys to work with in that.)

Originality: 7/10

Honestly, it was too alike Alice In Wonderland for me. I love Alice in Wonderland, and I thought yor fanfic was good, but it felt like I’m rereading Alice in Wonderland and it just bored me out a bit at the start. I suggest, though this would be very difficult because you’re already into the fanfic, that you should stray a bit from Alice in Wonderland. You don’t need to have most of the parts and characters of Alice In Wonderland in your fanfic, try to give a bigger twist of your own in it.

(Well... with all due respect... it's like Alice in Wonderland because it IS Alice in Wonderland. It's not supposed to be just a story that follows the same lines of Alice in Wonderland... it is a story that IS Alice in Wonderland with a little twist. There isn't any way I'll be straying from it... sorry. And my bigger twist is the curse and everything that happens to her. All this romance is my twist.)

Plot: 17/20

Truthfully, I didn’t really like your plot at first. I didn’t like the idea everyone falling in love with Alice. It may be very original, but it sounded really silly. It just didn’t work out for me.

At times, the story was so fast paced and, since everyone is in love with her, I wasn’t sure who the main characters in Boyfriend that the story is meant to revolve around were. And having all 6 of the members in a love heptagon would make the story very confusing (although it is a wish for every fan to have all the Boyfriend members in love with them).

I think you should plot out (on a paper or in your head) where you want this story to be heading and who your main characters are and, one by one, put everything together. This would help you a lot in getting your ideas refined.

(I actually do have everything plotted out, and there is no main character because all of the boys are the main characters.)

Flow: 10/10

The flow was good. You clearly stated the POVs at the start and the whole thing is spaced out so it was easy to read.

(Yay finally a perfect score I can take credit for :P)

Character/Detail: 8/10

I was a bit confused with your plot that everyone loves the mortal. Wouldn’t other immortals in Wonderland fall in love with her as well? Yet there’s no mention of them a just the Boyfriend group. And according to your description of the town and your addition of some town members like the shop assistant, I’m sure that the Boyfriend members are not the only people there.

(Yes, everyone in Wonderland is in love with Alice... she just hasn't had a chance to meet anyone yet. The shop keeper is in love with her too and so is every single inhabitant of Wonderland, not just the boyfriend boys. They just haven't met her yet, so they don't understand what they're feeling.)

Grammar: 20/20

On the other hand, your grammar and punctuation was very good. WELL DONE! You tenses were written well and you had very little mistakes.

(I'm a grammar nazi :3)

Style of Writing: 9/10

As I told you before, I thought your style of writing was too fast paced at times and this made me very confused about where the story was heading.

(Yeah... I gotta work on that. I've been trying to slow it down ^^')

Total: 88/100

General Comments:

I think this story has a lot of potential to become a really good fanfic but I think you should slow down a bit. Rethink about this fanfic and plan out everything before continuing is the best way you should go. And about your writer’s block, everyone has it so don’t worry too much. I’m sure your subscribers won’t mind if you take your time to get everything together again. Don’t force yourself to quickly write the next chapter while you have writer’s block. Just let your ideas naturally come to you and base your stories upon them. I really do this this fanfic can get a better response, so keep up the good work!

(Thanks for the review!)

**Reviewed by Deuce's Review Shop http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/44270/deuces-review-shop-review