Pots and Pans

Since Baekhyun can't play any instruments to save his life, what makes him think he can compose instrumental music?

"Baekhyun it sounds like you just recorded yourself banging pots and pans together," Kris quickly turns off the speakers after 15 seconds of cacophony. 

"It does not!" Clearly Baekhyun is offended because that is exactly what he did. Kris doesn't need to know that, "You just haven't gotten to the good part yet!"

"Come on, let's just give him a chance," Luhan reaches for the speakers. Immediately a horrid screeching that sounds like a dying rabbit escapes the speakers.

"Oooh! Wait for it! Here's the good part!" Baekhyun bounces in his seat.

The good part ends up being a sound of "Shattering glass and a barking dog" as Kris describes it.

"It...it's not that bad," Luhan forces a smile while side eyeing Kris, who raises an eyebrow, "Well, I mean it could use a little improving?"

Baekhyun does not look convinced and promptly deflates like a balloon, "I'm going to fail this class. Why did I even take it?"

"It's a lost cause, you'll just have to repeat the year. Hey, at least you'll graduate with Sehun and Jongin."

"Nooo! I can't be stuck with Sehun and Jongin of all people! Sehun can't even play his viola properly!"

"I heard that!" Sehun yells from across the room.

"Aw come on, that's a little to drastic, Kris. You won't fail Baekhyun! We'll help you!" Luhan smiles encouragingly.

"Nope, loss cause. No can do. Zip. Nada. Not helping." Kris swivels towards his computer and promptly puts his earphones in.

"Luhan! Help me!" Baekhyun whines.

"Well...let's start from the beginning." Luhan plays the track again and pales when he hears the banging pots.

"Lost cause," Kris whispers.

Baekhyun looks at Luhan who starts gnawing at his lip, "You know what! Kris is right! Let's just start over!" Luhan reaches over Baekhyun and presses the delete button.

Squishy Booties

Butts. Yes. Good. Jongin could get used to this. He steps back and stares at the position Kyungsoo is in, "You'll definitely hit a home run, Soo!" Jongin scales his eyes shamelessly down the smaller boys' behind.

"You think so?" Kyungsoo smiles at Jongin.

"Yup!" Jongin walks away from home base and plops down onto the grass next to Chen.

"You couldn't have been a little, you know, more discrete?" Chen supplies helpfully.

"I can't help it. Aren't you ever attracted to certain body parts? Mine's just unfortunately has a negative connotation."

"Teeth. Teeth are very nice," Baekhyun chimes in.

"Hands are very nice, especially Kris'" Yixing says dreamily.

"See! There's nothing wrong with liking butts!" Jongin rationalizes as he stares at Kyungsoo's bouncing behind as he's running.

"Well, you don't have to make it so obvious," Chen adds.

"At least he doesn't go around groping them," Luhan rolls towards the group.

"Well...that's not necessarily true..." Baekhyun remembers the numerous times Jongin had helped him with baseball.

Chen freezes.

"You let him touch it!" Luhan yells, "And you returned the favor!"

Chen stares at Jongin in horror. First spit, now groping? He needs to un-friend this disgusting bastard before he gets infected by his weird antics.

"Awww Chen Chen, don't be scared. I won't do anything to you! As cute as your flat is. I prefer round squishy kinds!"

"Do you think it's too late to transfer out of this class?" Chen whispers to Yixing.

"Don't worry! touching is just how Jongin shows his affections for his friends!" Yixing smiles back, "See!"

Chen pales when Jongin gives Kyungsoo a hard smack against his cute squishy .

"Come on Chen, I'll help you fix your position!" Jongin moves to get up.

Cue ear shattering scream from Chen.

The Hobo Life

"This one for the boys with the booming system. Top down, AC with the cooling system. When he come up in the club, he be blazin' up. Got stacks on deck like he savin' up." 

"Is-is that Chanyeol?" Luhan stops mid-stride at the outlet mall he's shopping at.

"Er...I think so?" Minseok stares at the gangly teen who is perched underneath a tree playing an acoustic rendition of Super Bass.

"I didn't know he was homeless," Luhan sips on his iced latte from Starbucks. (Wow, so hipster, Luhan).

"He's not?" Minseok states...questions? "I mean, I drove him home the other day..."

"Well, it looks like he has all his stuff with him," Luhan points at the large backpack and multiple guitars.

At that moment, Chanyeol looks up and his eyes shine with recognition.

"Er...hi?" Luhan waves cautiously.

Chanyeol immediately smiles with all his teeth and beckons the two shoppers to come over.

"What are you doing here, Chanyeol?" Minseok questions.

"I'm making a living!"

"...You mean working?" 

"Nope! Living!"

"Is everything alright?" Luhan asks.

"Everything is perfectly a-okay! Why do you ask?"

"Don't you think he's...er...exceptionally more happy that usual?" Minseok whispers to Luhan.

"Yes...it's more forced that genuine though..."

"Shouldn't you be at home?" Minseok supplies helpfully.

"What do you mean? This is my home!"

Luhan grips Minseok's arm and swivels him away from Chanyeol's ears, "See, I told you he was homeless!"

"No! He's not! I SAW him walk into the house!" Minseok whispers back fiercely. 

Luhan rolls his eyes, "Here you go, Chanyeol. That was wonderful playing," Luhan drops some money into Chanyeol's open guitar case.

Chanyeol looks at the gold colored coins in his case and frowns, "Luhan, those are coins from the arcade."

"Right! That way it'll give you a reason to stay in an air conditioned building!"

Chanyeol pouts and scoops up the change and stuffs it in his pocket.

"Come on Chanyeol, let's take you home," Minseok sighs and makes way to grab for the acoustic guitar.

"No! I told you this was my home!"

"Chanyeol, I watched you walk into your house two days ago! I saw your mother wave her hand at me."

Chanyeol shakes his head at Minseok.

"Chanyeol, are you trying to become a street musician?" Luhan recalls the conversation he overhead Kris and Chanyeol having about a man who made $200 from playing his violin on the streets.

"Yup! I don't have to pay rent and the pay is good!"

Luhan and Minseok make eye contact come to a silent mutual agreement. Minseok grabs Chanyeol's guitar and shoves it back into its case, while Luhan does his best to wrangle the giant baby to bring him home to his mommy.

Character Background: Luhan

Luhan is a senior and is in band, choir, orchestra, and symphonic bland. He plays the tuba and violin (5th chair, 1st violin). In choir, he is a soprano. He picked tuba, because it felt like a manly instrument. He wanted to prove himself in middle school because it was nearly more than half his size. He picked the violin because he thought it would be an easy instrument since everyone played it. Boy was he wrong. He has a GPA of 3.8 because he needs to keep it up in order to be a Student Body Officer. He joins nearly every club in his junior year because he wanted to get votes in order to be a Student Body Officer his senior year and because of the free food. Outside of music, he is part of nearly all the clubs, except for Crochet Club, yeah, that one is weird, he plays for the soccer team.

A/N:

Wow was that a word vomit or what. Sorry I haven't updated in like a year? Hahahahaha....yea no. Well here it is! Finally! I hit a major writer's block and then Spring and Summer semester decided to smack me in the face. Anyways, sorry to finally update and........to finally burst your bubble that this was the last chapter...BUT before you throw knives at me, there's a fancy epilogue coming soon! Plus, if you're interested in this kind of style of writing or humor, I have another fic in process with OT12 in a fraternity/college au. So, skidadle your cute squishy booty over there. Comment below and see you guys soon!

Edit: I put in Luhan's Character Background. Oopsie...meant to put it in before I published it. Thanks to a Dummyworm for remiding me!