SeungHyun stared at the Police Chief Jin, at Jae Sang, at his dad. Still, none of this made any sense.

Seungri was seventeen years old – seventeen – and he had held his license for such a short time that he was even more safety conscious than his mother was.

Had been. His mind cruelly reminded him of the brutal fact that his mom was dead. He wondered how in hell he was going to break that fact to his brother. And he also wondered how he was supposed to pick up the pieces when the dust settled over all of this.

As always, his eyes sought out his father – seeking guidance and strength. But he had to look quickly away. Even as he did, he squeezed his eyes tightly shut – right now, he did not need to witness his dad descending into complete disintegration.

SeungHyun’s heart also ached and though he longed to follow his father's spiral into grief, he was equally determined to focus on the living.

His brother still lived – and he needed him.

SeungHyun’s eyes sought out a door – and he found it with frightening speed. The lettering was red and prohibitive, but SeungHyun still felt himself drawn towards it. Seungri, he knew, was behind that door. Too much previous experience – too many painful memories – told him that.

Then Jae Sang grabbed hold of his arm, stopping him in his tracks. He turned, intending to voice a protest, but the look on the young cop's face stilled his tongue.

Jae Sang looked distraught – but determined. "You can't go in there" he said – and though his tone was firm, it also carried clear reluctance.

"Like hell I can't," SeungHyun growled in response. All he knew was that his brother would need him – nothing else was of any consequence.

"SeungHyun…" Jae Sang tried to start an argument that he had no hope of winning – but then rescue came from the most unlikely source.

"SeungHyun." Hyunsuk’s voice was ravaged by tears but still held the strength that his son needed to hear. "Son, we need to… we need to formally identify…"

"NO!" SeungHyun screamed out the denial and then tried to fight as his dad grasped his arms; as he was surrounded by people all imploring him to calm down; as he tried to focus on the living and not the… Even his mind shied away from the word.

"No…" The word was more of a sob this time and he was blindsided as grief and shock double-teamed him. "No…" He collapsed into his dad's embrace and then just let him hold him as if he were five years old again.

"No, dad…" He couldn't go to the morgue; couldn't see his mom lying on a cold, metal slab. It all held to much finality. And he wasn't ready to face that yet.

"We need to do this." Hyunsuk’s normally strong voice shook with grief. He grasped his older son’s shoulder – trying to offer strength; but also seeking it in return. "We have to go and say goodbye."

But what about Seungri? SeungHyun’s mind screamed in response. Focus on the living. "How are we going to tell Seungri?"

Hyunsuk shook his head and sighed. It was one conversation he was dreading with all of his heart. How did you tell your son that he might have been responsible for the death of his own mother?

Somewhere along the line, someone had already broken the devastating news to Seungri. He had asked questions and his insatiable curiosity wouldn't accept the fobbed off answers that were being offered to him.

In the end, there had been no choice. Seungri had been getting more and more agitated – convinced that he was being lied to. And it had been down to a doctor to tell the awful truth as gently as possible – offering only minimal details and promising that someone would be along to talk to him very soon.

They also told him that he would be kept in overnight – just as a precaution – and, for once in his life, Seungri didn't protest at all.

He was sent from the Emergency Room to Recovery and then into a Private Room – and it was there that the remainder of his family were allowed to see him.

The remainder of his family… His eyes misted over as he tried to comprehend what he had just been told. His mother was dead.

He himself had a headache, a few aches and pains and a nasty seatbelt bruise. And his mother was dead.

Seungri’s memories of the afternoon were a blur – and the more he tried to focus on them, the more indistinct they became. Trying to force any more recollections only served to make his aching head pound. A small part of him wondered if he could ask for some stronger medication – but he didn't want his already fuzzy thinking to degenerate any further.

He knew that his dad and his brother were there – and they might be the ones to give him the answers he craved. He needed to know the details. He needed to know if it was, in any way, his fault.

Then Seungri heard a gentle knock at the door and he forced his eyes open.

"Hey." SeungHyun’s greeting was forcedly relaxed and simple, as per the doctors' instructions.

It was incredibly difficult to try and stay calm. Not when he was still reeling from the devastating shock that had so recently been thrown at him. Not when his father was clearly on the verge of breaking down completely. Not when his brother was lying in a hospital bed looking as though his world had just ended.

But somebody had to keep it together – and, for now at least, that somebody had to be him.

"How are you feeling?" He scrutinised his brother as he asked the question. Bumps and scrapes aside, he didn't seem any the worse for wear. Not physically at least, but there was a haunted look to Seungri’s eyes that chilled him down to his very soul.

"Hyung? Dad?" Unsurprisingly, Seungri didn't answer the direct question. He lifted his eyes for a brief moment, and then quickly returned his gaze to the bedclothes. "What happened? They won't tell me… Other than…"

Don't say it! SeungHyun didn't want to hear his brother's sad voice speak of their mother's demise. Each time such words were spoken out loud, it stabbed at him so deeply that the pain it caused was almost physical.

But he had no need to worry on that count. Seungri seemed as equally incapable of saying the words as SeungHyun was. However, his relief was short-lived as he realised that Seungri was still awaiting an answer from him.

"Seungri…" He began – and then trailed off. What could he possibly say? The doctors had warned him of the need to try and keep his brother calm; of not to overly agitate him in any way. Primarily, the young man needed to rest.

"Seungri." His father’s tone made SeungHyun wonder if his dad had been privy to that same instruction.

SeungHyun straightened up and looked towards his father. Grief had aged the man; had deepened the furrows on his brow and the fine lines around his eyes. But there was also a strange blankness to his distinguished features.

SeungHyun’s breath caught in his throat. Was his dad already, somehow, blaming his youngest son for his wife's death? He had to stop this before it even started, as there was a very real danger that things might go too far. Words might be spoken that could never be un-said and their fractured family might be destroyed completely.

"Hey, it can wait until morning." He forced what he hoped was a reassuring smile. It didn't matter that it was still only the early evening. He just wanted to put off this conversation for a while – at least until he'd had a chance to talk to his dad. "Seungri, if you can't remember…"

"Seungri, the police are right outside." Hyunsuk spoke over his eldest son – and his tone was still ground out of granite. "They have some questions for you."

"Dad, does it have to be now?" SeungHyun already knew the answer to that. Police Chief Jin would never put such pressure on them at a time like this.

"SeungHyun!" There was a definite and clear warning in his father’s tone – and SeungHyun bristled against it. He was only trying to help; trying to stop grief driven words from driving a wedge into their family. He didn't deserve such castigation.

He thought he knew what his dad was trying to do: he was trying to maintain some distance; to treat Seungri as a witness and not a family member; to try and get some answers without his emotions getting in the way. But, though SeungHyun understood the method, he couldn't agree with it.

An angry retort sprung to his lips and, if he had spoken, he might have compounded the very damage he was trying to avert. But a soft, sad voice stilled his tongue.

"It… It's okay, Hyung." Seungri actually sounded as though things were anything but okay – and when he raised his head, there were tears in his eyes. "I guess it's better we do this now…"

And Seunghyun wanted to rage against his father – as it looked as though that were the very last thing Seungri wanted to do. But he couldn't. He couldn't make things worse, when they were already rapidly descending towards hell.