Chapter 3 - The Ache

The snow fell outside as he stared onto the street, drawing random shapes on the window’s foggy pane. The wind whistled outside softly as it blew past and he shivered when a gust of wind entered the room through the slightly open window. The silence in the house was too unnerving. Usually, either Changmin or Yoochun would be bothering him. But ever since the lawsuit, Yoochun had retreated into his shell and Changmin... He had no idea. He missed their two other brothers a lot, so much that that at times, he would even dream of the times they were together, but the only difference with them not being dreams but memories. Happy memories, memories that they will always treasure forever, memories that is the only thing that ties them together. They weren’t allowed to contact the two at all. He knew that Jaejoong had been trying his best to contact them but it’s always the dial tone that he ends up getting. It felt weird. Usually, there won’t be a moment of peace in the house as the two youngest are always bickering, either over food or video games. It just didn’t felt right without Changmin quarreling with him, as if something was missing from his life. The boy blinked his eyes in an attempt to prevent his oncoming tears from falling.

He turned his head back in time just in time to see a picture frame that was leaning against the wall on the table fall onto the ground with a dull sound. His eyes widened in shock and he rushed over to it, slumping down on the ground and picked it up, checking it over and over again for any signs of damage. There was none, thankfully. The boy let out a relived breath before standing up slowly, clutching the picture frame tightly to his chest as he stumbled onto his bed and sat on it.

Brushing his finger gently over the picture, he allowed it to trace over the familiar outlines of the figures in the picture. Droplets of water dripped onto the frame, it was only then he noticed that he was crying before quickly wiping his tears on his hand. The pain, the regret, the loneliness was too much for him to bear. All he wanted was for them to be together again. Was that too much to ask? Apparently so.

“Jingle bells, jingle bells...”

The cheerful singing of the Christmas hymn drifted into his thoughts and pulled him into reality. He got up and switched off the radio, with completely no idea of how it was on in the first place. The hymn was supposed to bring joy and happiness to everyone, but he was not included in the ‘everyone’. All it brought back was painful memories and lingering feelings.

Christmas was around the corner. A happy event for almost everyone. But definitely not them. It was their anniversary after that, something that they should be happy for. But how could they? How could they feel happy when the feeling of emptiness always around? It would be another cold anniversary without them. Another anniversary that will only consist of three, not five. Another lonely anniversary.

Knock knock.

T