Chapter [8]: Can I love you.. at this exact moment?

SiWon POV

Usually it will be awkward, like really really awkward between the two of us after such an AWKWARD situation.. but what happened was rather fun.. I dragged him along to Baskin Robbins across the street so we can spend some more time together.. alone..!

“its almost Christmas time.. The weather is freezing and ur dragging me here to eat ice cream.. and not even paying for it”  he complained with that famous pout on his face.

I grinned.

“we could have enjoyed Hyuk’s cooking if u didn’t just withdraw from thee just like that..”

And I see his facial expression changed, he was annoyed..

I ordered 2 vanilla + chocolate ice cream with extra nuts for the two of us before deciding to go for a night walk.

I looked at him, he was still out of it.

I sighed.

“r u gonna sulk all night.. u look horrible..”

He glared at me.

“am not sulking.. am just tired..”

“or maybe jealous…” I said while testing the 1^st spoon of my ice cream.

He stopped and turned to look at me.

“jealous…? Why would I be jealous.. for ur info Mr.Choi.. I don’t give a crap about who u hang out with, ur friends if u have any.. ur love life… THERE IS NOTHING ABOUT U THAT I GIVE A CRAP ABOUT OKAY?”

I smiled.

“what I meant is that ur jealous coz I got 3 scoops of the ice cream U IDIOT..”

He was now 100 times more annoyed than earlier, I kept smiling like a fool.. for some reason I felt good for pissing him off.. there was something about him being mad at my intimate relation with Teuk hyung that made me feel a bit just a little bit happy :P

There was that bench ahead of them, like 10 more steps away where they decided to sit to finish eating their ice cream before heading back home.

I looked at him while eating, he was spaced out.

‘’is it the first time..?’’ I asked.

He looked at me.

‘’is it the first time u space out to think of me..’’

YeSung placed his ice cream cup aside and looked at me.

‘’awuh Choi SiWon ur giving ur self so much credit.. u know?’’

I grinned.

‘’why not? Isn’t that like DUH.. common sense.. am young, good-looking, fit and tall.. who won’t fall for such a guy…?’’

YeSung act as if he was thinking deeply.

‘’straight men I would say…’’

And both started laughing.

I felt ease now that I saw his smile for once that day.

There was a minute of silence before I looked back to him.

‘’he is my best friend…’’

He looked at me with the same angry, sad eyes from earlier.

‘’a friend whom u will be so physically intimate around, that’s so not like u SiWon..’’

I smiled again.

He is jealous, it’s official !

I seated myself so that I was facing his side.

‘’Teuki hyung is like my life savior, when we met back at the states, I was being hospitalized after getting assaulted by a gang in my class back in college, Teuk hyung was my hospital roommate, his case wasn’t similar though, he was being hospitalized after suffering from sugar tumult since he is diabetic..’’ I stopped for a second before sighing.

‘’Teuki hyung.. stick up by side like a glue T.T I was never the friendly guy.. like never.. for some reason he got so interested in studying my mentality, psychology and attitude as a sample for one of his research papers.. eventually it didn’t feel irritating anymore as we grow a deep relationship that goes beyond brotherhood, he is like… my everything.. even though I am technically orphan as my mom is dead and my family ties are almost torn apart with.. he will compensate the parents and the hyungs spot in my life….’’

I felt him placing his hand on my thigh.

‘’from now on. And if u truly open ur heart a little bit more,.. he won’t be the only one willing to sick by ur side SiWon.. just try.. would u…?’’

I smiled, looking at him.

‘’I could also go out with him, u think he will turn the offer down…?’’

He frowned once again before standing up.

‘’ U JERK.. GO MARRY HIM IF U WANT.. ITS MY FAULT FOR FALLING FOR UR TRICKS.. NO COMPASSION ANYMORE.. AM LEAVING…’’

I laughed before standing up and running to catch him.

He turned to look at me as I held his arm.

‘’did anyone tell u before how hateful u are…?’’

I smiled before sliding my hands down his arms and held both of his hands.

‘’and did i tell u before that ur worth losing not only my mind for.. but my sanity, hatred for life and all insecurities….’’

End of POV

YeSung POV

It was THE DAY, Kangin’s birthday in which we have been preparing for, on the last 7 days.. we decided to close the restaurant today, the party will be held in there but we weren’t planning to serve any customers today.

Cleaning is done, same for the orders of flowers, buffet and all.. since our restaurant doesn’t serve Chinese food, we ordered lots of that from another restaurant, since its Kangin’s favorite food :D it was around 7:00 PM when we started decorating the walls, some funky wallpapers, and banners with ‘’Happy 36^th birthday Kangin’’

‘’AAAAish.. wouldn’t it be more funny if u add the word – ajhussi- at the end of that sentence..?’’ SiWon started his sarcastic attack.

I gave him the LOOK.

‘’yah.. stay quiet and help me hanging this, hold the chair for me…’’

‘’arasooo =.=’’ he said in a bored tone.

I stand on the chair to reach for the upper side of the wall right in the straight view once someone enters the restaurant.

I was struggling a bit trying to glue the edges of that.

‘’AAH u shorty, let me do that instead, its gonna take u forever…’’

I turned slightly to scold him.

‘’who are u calling shoo.. oh oooooh’’ the chair start moving and I was almost fell on the floor when SiWon held my waist tightly.

‘’KINCHANA…???’’  he asked.

I took a deep breath.

‘’yes am fine.. thanks…’’

He frowned as a reply and pulled me down.

‘’forget it, ur clumsiness is not a choice here, u will break ur neck or back if u fell.. not only a shorty, but a clumsy one hahaha’’

I pouted and was about to yell at him when Hyuk appeared from nowhere.

‘’TADAAAAAAAAAAAA.. surprise…’’

Teuk walked after him with 2 other men carrying what looks like a piano.

SiWon eyes widened.

‘’hyung ur not serious?’’ he said, his jaw half-dropped.

Teuk gave his perfect dimpled smile before crossing his arms.

‘’am not.. make it worth the renting fee Choi or else <____________<’’

What I realized later is that SiWon is a freakin awesome perfect pianist.

Teuk suggested adding a piano performance during the party since Kangin is a classic music fan and SiWon can play some pieces.

SiWon was seated there, stretching his arms, playing some random pieces of music.

I was back at his shoulder, looking closely at how he plays.

‘’r u gonna stand there for so long…’’ he asked without looking at me.

‘’wanna observe the pianist Choi… am not convinced yet…’’

SiWon then turned to look at me.

‘’hyung ur really is giving me too little credit, I will be more than pleased to proof u wrong.. now come sit here..’’ and he pulled me down to sit next to him on that already half-occupied seat.

Did he just call me.. Hyung…?

He started playing some random pieces and honestly it sounded SO good.

‘’so….?’’ He asked.

I smiled at him.

‘’I have to admit its good..’’

‘’there is thing one nice piece, will teach u how to play that…’’ and he asked me to place both my hands on the piano keyboard and spread them lightly.

‘’just copy me…’’ and he placed both his hands on top of mine, his left arm is circled over my back and placed on my left hand.

I felt a bit nervous.. this was the first time we sit too close with such a way of physical contact..I saw him playing a random piece, he was playing it using MY fingers.. I couldn’t stop smiling.. I couldn’t stop looking at him..

Handsome isn’t the right word, too handsome…? Not this one too.. FREAKIN handsome.. not that too.. he was….

‘’done staring at me Boss…?’’ he said looking straight at my eyes.

I looked away.

‘’staring.. Tsk.. I was just…’’

‘’mesmerized….?’’

I looked back at him with a pout.

‘’ur SO in love with ur self..’’

He smiled before taking his hands off of me and placing both his arms on the edges of the seat, literally trapping me there.

‘’wouldn’t u be…..?’’ he asked with that undeniably y smile.

I swallowed my saliva slowly, trying to avoid looking at his eyes.

‘’Hyung….’’ He called me again and I felt my heart thumping.

‘’mmmmm…’’ all what I manage to say in reply.

He was staring at my….. LIPS…??????

What the hell was this brat thinking.

He then grinned before releasing his trap around me.

‘’never mind….’’ He said still grinning like a DEVIL ;-;

I sighed before slapping his arm.

‘’IDIOT….’’ I said before walking away angrily.

That idiot..

Who he thinks is he playing around with >:(

End of POV

What neither one of them knew, is that they were being watched with concerned eyes.

Hyuk sighed before turning to look at Teuk.

‘’I think its clear now.. the reason for my concerns…’’

Teuk was looking straight at SiWon who was now fooling around still-angry YeSung inside the restaurant, where he and Hyuk were watching them from outside.

‘’so… YeSung-ssi is basically engaged to SiWon’s elder brother…’’

‘’ who happen to resemble him identically..’’ Hyuk added.

Hyuk’s phone started ringing so excused himself.

Teuk smiled to him before looking back at SiWon who was now helping YeSung carrying some chairs to set them in a certain order inside the restaurant.

That smile in his face..

I don’t even remember I saw his smiling like this before..

SiWon-ah… if u r to fall in love..

Why..? why does it to be him…?

Why…?

It was around 8:00 p.m when Kangin called Hyuk to confirm with him that that urgent meeting he asked for is still scheduled to be in the restaurant.

Hyuk hang up and looked at everyone in the room, including Hae, Teuk, SiWon, YeSung and the restaurant staff who joined later for parting.

‘’he is few steps away, keep quiet and follow the plan OKAY..’’

‘’YES’’ everyone said in a whispering voice.

The moment Kangin stepped in the restaurant which was so dark as the lights were off..

‘’BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG’’

A chaos was heard and the famous singing chores started.

‘’HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO KANGIN.. YOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO’’ and a  loud applause was heard.

Kangin was standing there dumbfounded when SiWon ran to his side.

‘’HYUNG.. ur forever a failure.. what’s with that face.. u should act all shy and happy.. AAAAAAH.. chincha…’’

Kangin looked at him with a stupid expression on his face.

‘’this is not a secret camera.. is it…?’’

And everyone burst in laughter over the hilarious comment.

Happiness isn’t the right word to describe what Kangin felt, he was beyond happy.. he was smiling sincerely.. the smile that was rare to appear but surely to capture everyone’s heart.

‘’so this is ur Teuki hyung that u told me about hundreds of times before..’’ Kangin asked looking at SiWon who nodded.

‘’nice to meet u Kangin-ss…’’ said Teuk, shaking hands with the other.

‘’same here.. this kid is obsessed with u.. its serious….’’ Kangin said and SiWon slapped his arm.

‘’Hyung don’t put it that way.. it sounds so weird…’’

Teuk then pulled SiWon to his side before placing his arm around his shoulder.

‘’YA.. Choi.. do u probably have feelings for me..? if yes, why the denial.. just propose already…’’

And everyone started laughing.

YeSung was busy making sure that everyone is enjoying their meals, and once the music started playing, MaRi who also was invited ran to where the guys were gathering and held DongHae’s arm.

‘’oppa let’s dance together..’’

DongHae placed his plate of food aside and dragged Hyuk along with MaRi and Teuk, and all started dancing, 2PM ‘’Hands Up’’ was playing.

SiWon thought it was the best time to hand in his present for Kangin.

‘’HYUNG.. this is ur gift.. make sure not to get overly emotional and cry coz u will definitely be touched.’’

Kangin looked suspiciously at his donseng before placing the gift SiWon handed him and place it on a nearby table and start unwrapping it.

His eyes widened in shock and SiWon started giggling.

‘’WHAT THE…’’

‘’PERFECT choice right.. hyung should get me a gift for choosing such a gift for him….’’

‘’U ERT.. boxers.. is that what’s gonna move me in tears u SICK PERSON..’’

And SiWon was literally rolling on the floor laughing with Kangin pinching his arms.

YeSung smiled at the view of their brotherly love overwhelming feeling.

It was around 9:15 p.m when everyone gathered for cutting the cake.

Kangin blow the candles, and the same chaotic applause from earlier was heard.

He was about to cut the cake, with SiWon hand placed on his.

When the sound of the restaurant door being slapped, everyone turned to the direction of the sound.

YeSung gasped.

Kangin dropped the knife..

And Teuk eyes widend.

It was MinJung....

She walked slowly making her way into the centre of the place when she herself gasped.

‘’you….’’ She pointed at Kangin, who was now starting to get dizzy.

‘’Min…Min Jung-ah….’’

Teuk, SiWon and YeSung looked at him in shock.

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON..?

Teuk was trembling, he turned around, not wanting to look at her.

Hyuk thought something is wrong with him, before he could ask him if he was okay.. She started to talk.

‘’SiHan-ssi…..’’ she moved her focus to SiWon who was so annoyed at that instant.

‘’there we go again…’’ said SiWon in an irritated tone, she then ran to his side, pushing away some people along the way before she hugged him so tightly.

YeSung eyes widened.

‘’SiHan-ah.. I was going crazy SiHan-ah.. how could u do this to me.. u get into an accident.. u fell in coma,, u regain ur conciseness without even thinking of informing me.. do u know how worried I was..’’

Now things were getting all out of control. Kangin was close to lose balance when DongHae held him.

‘’President.. are u okay…?’’

SiWon pushed her away so harshly that she fell into the floor. And walked to hold Kangin.

‘’Hyung.. are u okay….? Look at me.. hyung…’’

MinJung was sitting on the floor where SiWon just pushed her, looking dumbly at Kangin and SiWon not understanding a thing of what was going on.

‘’unni.. r u okay..? did SiWon oppa hurt u…?’’ MaRi walked to MinJung side tapping her shoulder.

MinJung looked at MaRi in confusion.

‘’SiWon..??’’

YeSung stepped in.

‘’Yes SiWon-ssi.. Choi SiWon-ssi.. SiHan younger brother.. so stop clinging into him and hanging around.. WHAT THE HELL BROUGHT U HERE ANYWAY…?’’ YeSung yelled at her.

‘’MinJung-ah….’’ Kangin called her name, he was clearly pale.

She stands up, cleaning her dress, before looking at him.

‘’WHAT? What do u want..? if ur gonna beg and plead.. its not the right time to do so..’’ She then looked at SiWon.

‘’SiHan-ssi.. I need an explanation.. what the hell is this other name they are calling u by… and that man….’’ She pointed at Kangin.

‘’why the hell are u sticking by his side.. did he get to u? told u about our history together.. are u mad at me because of that…?’’

Everyone was getting so confused, until Hyuk couldn’t take it anymore.

He held MinJung arm and pulled her away from everyone.

‘’u created enough troubles, ruining our party.. so now GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE…’’

She struggled but wasn’t able to resist Hyuk strong grip on her arm so she end up shouting.

‘’SIHAN-SSI DON’T BELIEVE HIM.. HE IS LYING.. I REJECTED HIM.. THAT’S WHY HE WANNA GET HIS REVENGE.. SIHAN-SSI…’’ and she was pushed away, out of the restaurant before Hyuk looked the door once she way out.

There was no point of carrying out the party, everyone felt so uncomfortable and disturbed, so everyone left.. including SiWon who decided to drive Kangin home since this later was close enough to faint, he will spend the night over at his brother’s place.

Around mid-night

Hae, Hyuk, Teuk and YeSung was almost done with the cleaning.. everyone was so quite..

YeSung covered MaRi’s body with his jacket, since the kid end up sleeping in a tiny couch across the locker’s room.

‘’ur okay…?’’ Teuk tapped YeSung’s shoulder as he stopped cleaning and sat in the first chair he saw his way.

‘’maybe.. I don’t know…’’

Teuk pulled a chair and sat next to him.

‘’it didn’t turn out well.. ‘’

YeSung shake his head in agreement.

‘’it was terrible.. Kangin almost passed out.. and all the things she said.. its very confusing…’’

Teuk face looked uneasy.

‘’can I ask.. who.. who is she…?’’

YeSung sighed.

‘’ that woman.. she is my ex-girlfriend…’’

Teuk gasped.

‘’ we broke up almost 4 years ago when she was casted in a movie that ensured her talent and get her explosive popularity.. we never contacted each other ever since.. but recently she showed up here in the restaurant and all that talk about SiHan-ssi.. I just.. I don’t know… I don’t understand.. and what she said about Kangin.. really.. am losing my mind.. I don’t know what the hell is going on..’’

Teuk closed his eyes, trying to function all what YeSung just said.

YeSung looked at him.

‘’sorry for troubling u.. its been only 3 days and u never had a peaceful day ever since u arrived here…’’

Teuk smiled weakly before placing his hand on YeSung’s thigh.

‘’am very…very grateful to u YeSung-ssi….’’

YeSung looked at him in confusion.

‘’to me…? For what…?’’

‘’our SiWon.. I never see him smiling in such a charming and sincere way.. I never see his being his REAL self before.. I always knew he is the hyper, cheerful, kind-hearted type.. its just.. his pain, his childhood and teenage weren’t that flowery.. this guy.. he is happy.. thanks to YeSung-ssi…’’

YeSung who was feeling totally annoyed a minute ago managed to draw a lovely smile.

‘’I don’t think this had anything to do with me.. SiWon-ah.. for me is so mysterious.. he is very moody.. one minute he will be so lovely and sweet.. the other minute he will be just a butthole…’’

Teuk laughed.

‘’well.. and that doesn’t make u find him charming at all…?’’

YeSung zoomed out.

‘’SiWon-ah.. is just…’’ and he sighed before looking at Teuk and smiling.

‘’if he is happy as u just said.. am happy to hear that.. this guy.. for some reason.. ‘’

‘’he is in love….’’ Teuk interrupted.

YeSung smile vanished.

‘’you.. what are u talking about?…’’he stuttered.

‘’he is happy because he is falling in love.. the love u and SiHan share.. am sure is the reason behind SiWon finally letting go of his fears of love.. allowing himself to just let himself feel what he restrained it before..’’

YeSung didn’t smile, or pout.. he just went blank..

‘’sunbanim.. we r done.. ‘’ Hyuk said.

‘’Teuk-ssi I will drive u home.. SiWon will sleep over at President place..’’ Hae added, and that how that gloomy night came to an end.

Next Day

Hae, Hyuk and SiWon decided to make up for Kangin for the night before, so they decided to go in a group hangout..

‘’where…?’’ YeSung asked as HaeHyuk dragged him into the car.

‘’amusement park…’’ Teuk who wanted to drive before he forget how to do so, answered behind the steering.

‘’that’s so childish ;A;’’ YeSung complained, after closing the door since everyone is seated now.

Teuk started the engine and started running the car, Hae guiding him through the way.

‘’I didn’t expect SiWon to convince Kangin of joining us…’’ Hyuk said.

‘’well if he failed to then what’s the point of this entire hangout…?’’ DongHae said, crossing his arms.

‘’SiWon is the only one capable of getting Kangin to do things he won’t usually do..’’ he then looked at YeSung who was seated at the back beside Hyuk through the front mirror ‘’he is capable of causing the most loyal heart to waver… that’s our SiWon…’’

YeSung lowered his head before trying to distract himself by looking through the window.

I don’t know why..

I really can’t find a reason..

Of WHY.. why the hell am I annoyed..

SiWon is in a relationship..?

What’s so wrong about it..?

He is only 21 years old..

He is in the age of dating..

Get ur head straight YeSung..

Its SiWon whose in a relationship..

Not SiHan.. but.. who is that person..?

Is it someone I know..

By the time YeSung finished his self-monologue, Teuk parked the car in the 1^st available parking spot and all 4 men get off of the car.

‘’where are they…?’’ DongHae asked.

‘’mom…’’ Hyuk was looking around.

‘’here we go.. there is SiWon..’’

YeSung turned to look at SiWon’s direction, he was waving at his friends, he and Kangin were standing right beside the entrance gate.

Kangin was looking way better than the day before.

‘’how did it go….?’’ Teuk asked SiWon.

‘’good.. very good that am worried he is gonna break-down but is deceiving me…’’

Teuk smiled.

‘’leave that to me.. I will try and get him to talk…’’

SiWon smiled to his friend before looking around, searching for that one person, but he couldn’t see him anywhere.

Teuk knew what SiWon was looking for.

‘’they went to get the tickets..’’ Teuk said and SiWon replied with a smile. Kangin joined after coming back from the toilet.

Hyuk got tickets for all 6 of them and they decided to spread around.

DongHae and Hyuk were wandering around taking silly selcas while Teuk and Kangin went to grab some coffee.

‘’sulking again…?’’ SiWon asked with a smile.

YeSung smiled.

‘’no.. am spacing out.. that’s different…’’ they were walking, not heading to a certain spot.

‘’well if u wanna stare at me I will allow u to do so although it annoys me but spacing out TO think of me is lame.. am over here…’’ and he stopped walking to look at the other.

‘’enjoy the view’’ and he bend a little bit while closing his eyes.

YeSung started laughing.

‘’idiot…’’ before pushing SiWon’s forehead lightly with his index finger.

‘’SiWon-ah.. YeSung hyung.. its our turn.. hurry up….’’

And the 4 were now seated, getting ready for a life-threatening experience in the roller coaster.

‘’WOHOOOOOOO gonna be fun….’’  DongHae was dancing in his seat.

‘’YA.. keep quite..’’ Hyuk scolded.

YeSung closed his eyes tightly.

SiWon looked at him and smiled.

‘’is it the right time to take a nap.. the right place…?’’

YeSung glared at him then SiWon closed his eyes immediately imitating him from earlier.

‘’aren’t u doing the same thing Mr. Big Mouth…’’

SiWon shake his head as no.

‘’nope, am praying for u to rest in peace…’’

‘’YOU CHOI SI…………..NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO’’ and the game started, for Hae and SiWon it was freakin hilarious as they were laughing out loud at the other two who screamed their last wishes throughout the game.

Once they get off, Hae and Hyuk disappeared.

‘’HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA oh god my stomach POUAHAHAHAHAH’’ SiWon tears stated to fall coz of too much laughing.

YeSung was pale.  He was still trembling in fear.

‘’oh God am still alive.. thanks God…’’

DongHae came running to SiWon’s side, he whispered something in his ear before running away to God knows where.

SiWon stopped laughing before turning to YeSung’s side.

‘’Hyung…’’

‘’……’’

‘’HYUNG….’’

YeSung looked at him.. his face is still colourless..

SiWon knew the guy is still praying for his survival from the roller coaster so he held YeSung arm and started running.

‘’YA YAAAAAAAAAA WHAT THE HELL.. WHY R U RUNNING.. LET GO OF MY ARM…’’ then when he regain his senses.

SiWon laughed at the elder, and didn’t reply back.

He then stopped in the middle of a big circular shaped kinda slippery stage.

YeSung was out of breath, he tried to collect his breath and pointed his finger at SiWon and before he could say anything at all he felt something elastic hitting his back.

‘’OUCH….’’

He turned back to see DongHae holding a balloon filled with water, he waved at him.

‘’Hyung.. don’t hate me for this….’’ YeSung didn’t get what he was saying.

‘’what…. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH’’ BAAAAAAAAAAANG.. it was SiWon’s turn to throw a water balloon at YeSung, it burst and his shirt is drenched in water now.

‘’YOU BRATS.. UR SO DEAD…’’

There was so many balloons in the edges of that big circular stage, and by the time YeSung held his first balloon, he received a third strike from Hyuk this time.

‘’sunbaenim meyanhae – sorry- plz don’t get me fired for this…..’’

Hyuk and Hae ran away once furious YeSung started running after them, he slipped 24554635645 times until his clothes were too wet, like totally wet.

SiWon walked carefully not to slip and help him stands up before he start another round of uncontrollable laughter.

‘’ur enjoying this so much Choi aren’t u…’’ YeSung said with a pout.

SiWon wasn’t that much splashed with water, he just pulled up his pants from the bottom so he can walk freely since they had to take off their shoes.

YeSung started walking slowly toward the other edge of the slippery stage when a rain of balloons showered him as more people started playing the same game.

SiWon stopped following him for a second.. the view of YeSung avoiding the water balloons attack felt more like YeSung dancing in the rain..

Jesus..

What the hell is this feeling..

YeSung stopped ‘’dancing’’, his thin layer shirt ‘’wet’’ shirt was more like a see-through now.. showing his milky skin..

SiWon was standing there like a fool looking at the elder who was trying to fix his messy wet hair which make him feel 100 times ier.

‘’SIWON U LITTLE JERK.. UR SO DEAD.. AM SO GONNA KILL U TODAY CHOI.. COME HERE…’’

SiWon smiled hearing the other’s usual threats, but in a matter of seconds his smile vanished as he saw 2 girls sitting in a small trolley being pushed by  a guy rolling on the trolley which was rapidly speeding into YeSung’s direction.

SiWon immediately ran to YeSung side and pulled him away, in that exact instance, a guy was almost ‘’skiing’’ barefooted, end up pumping into YeSung’s back pushing him forward into SiWon’s chest.

SiWon reflexes took over and he embraced the smaller man tightly.

YeSung was so upset, he started hitting SiWon back with his fists when the other held him even tighter as a response.

‘’tappon saram –bad person-…’’ YeSung said in an angry tone.

‘’did u get hurt somewhere….’’ SiWon asked in a low tone, still holding the other between his arms.

‘’how can I not when ur part of it.. all what I get being with u is pain.. just.. let go off me SiWon.. please…’’ YeSung then sounded like crying so SiWon pulled away.

He looked straight into YeSung’s eyes.

‘’r u really hurt…?’’

YeSung who looked ready to cry at any second tried to get SiWon to loosen his grip on his arms..

‘’just let go SiWon…’’

SiWon pulled him closer..

YeSung raised his head and looked at him with teary eyes.

‘’r u really angry coz I dragged u into this game…’’

YeSung sighed deeply before lowering his head.

SiWon raised the elder’s chin up and gasped seeing that YeSung was merely crying.

‘’ur … ur crying….?’’

YeSung looked away.

‘’am not.. this is water.. can’t u see am totally wet…’’

‘’if not then why can’t u look at me in the eye…’’

YeSung remain silent which made SiWon feel bad, like really bad.

‘’Hyung listen.. am sorry.. I thought u would like this game.. I didn’t know….’’

‘’chowanen saram…. –a person u like- essayo- do u really have someone u like….’’ YeSung said in a low tone.

SiWon looked confused.

‘’if u have someone u like u should have some consideration for that person’s feeling.. stop toying with me SiWon.. its enough.. I can’t take it anymore…’’

SiWon sighed before loosen his grip on YeSung’s arms.

‘’if am toying with u.. then its u to be blamed for me losing my sanity….’’

‘’see.. those stupid things u say gets on my nerves.. u say it so casually knowing NOTHING of how it sound.. of how it makes me feel….’’ YeSung said in a loud tone.

‘’how does it make u feel….’’ SiWon asked, looking deeply into the others eyes.

YeSung lowered his and looked away.

‘’what else.. how can I tell when ur forever is a slave of ur mood swings.. one minute ur this arrogant, butthole and another minute ur hugging me, holding me close like this.. making me feel like….’’ And he stopped.

SiWon took one step closer.. he raised YeSung’s chin up.

‘’feel like what…?’’

SiWon then placed a hand on YeSung’s cheek

 ‘’how do I make u feel YeSung…?’’

It’s the first time..

He call me by my name..

I swear I heard my heart thumping as he call my name..

I didn’t realize another tear fell of my eye until I felt his other hand erasing that..

He was now holding my face close.. too close.. too close for me not to give in..

SiWon then lowered his hands, they end up holding YeSung arms again.

‘’for a minute.. only for this one minute.. can u think of me… look at me.. at SiWon not Choi SiWon…’’

YeSung with water drops falling from his wet hair edges, looked directly at SiWon’s eyes, a bit confused.

‘’for once.. can I see u as.. YeSung.. rather than my brother in law.. can I … can I hug u….?’’

And it was the first time YeSung witness SiWon’s weak side even since the graveyard incident, it was the 1^st time he see him fighting his tears.

‘’I wish I had ever looked, thought… or felt of u as Choi SiWon.. if I ever did I wouldn’t been succumbing to my downfall…’’ said YeSung with a sad smile before he feel SiWon pulling him into a very tight hug.. a hug that made him realize that his life will never be the same after this day.. that his last bit of sanity evaporated the moment SiWon pulled him close to his heart, between his two arms.

For a minute..

Just a minute..

At this exact moment..

I wanna love you..

Kim YeSung..

End of Chapter [8]

A.N: another annoyingly long chapter ;A; am sorry for that..

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