“So it just comes out. From thin air? Like BAM!” I just couldn’t believe it.

“I used to talk with Teddy, but now it doesn’t work that way. I just need to think harder,” he clarifies, taking a piece of nachos and putting it into his mouth. We were at a side booth in Clyde’s next to a window facing the streets, with a glass of water in my hands, a root beer in his and a platter of nachos to share. I took off my flats and sit cross-legged on the wide booth seat, a habit I’ve unconsciously picked up when I get excited. Never did I imagine I would hear these stories coming out of his mouth firsthand, about his creative process and his music equipment, it was a world that I never world have imagined. Sometimes I think that all he really needed was a friend to talk to. I look at his hands, still lined with the rings and accessories I know he’s famous for, and I’m glad that even here, he remains himself; G-Dragon. “Did you know who I was from the beginning?”

“Your debut? No. I fell in love with Big Bang about four years ago, when I was eighteen. You do know you were basically the answer to a teenage girl’s hormone imbalances right?” He laughed out loud in response. I was glad I could amuse him.

“Harsh. That really wasn’t the reason why I pursued music, though.”

“Well, it’s not a bad side-accomplishment.”

“Not for Seung Ri, no,” he agreed, “he lived off their screams and tears.” I caught him reminiscing and curiosity got the better of me.

“Ji yong-ah,” I slowly begin, “Do you miss it?” I take a huge gulp of water as I stare at him. His face seemed confused, conflicted and I immediately began to feel guilty. I realized that I had no right to ask him.

“Of course,” he replies reassuringly, “It was five years of my life where I was as close as I could be to living the dream.”

“It’s not over yet, I’m sure.”

“Maybe, but I’m not ready to be so, well, exposed. I already had a taste of the repercussions it had. But I really can’t say much. Daesung-ie, he went through so much more. I had no idea why I had to choose, at that moment, to make it worse.”

“It’s a double-edged sword,” I agreed, “Is that why you don’t drink much? You’re too self-conscious?” I remember he didn’t even touch a drop of alcohol last night.

“That was because I had to drive. I drink, leisurely. It just comes with the industry, Erika.”

“Lee Ri Ah. That’s my Korean name. I don’t use it much though, everyone calls me Erika.”

“Ri Ah.” The words tumble out of his mouth so effortlessly, and I don’t know whether it was because it’s been a while since I heard it, but it felt so sweet that I almost shuddered.

“But strangely, it sounds so much better when you say it.”

“It’s a good name.”

“It’s a matter of formality really.” The pelting down of rain onto the window, reminded us of the passing time and Ji Yong quickly paid the bill and got us out of the restaurant. “Do you know what Dutch pay means?” I ask him.

“Yes. And I don’t do it.” He sees my frown and looks away, trying to figure out how to get us safely to his car under the pouring rain. It was past midnight, and the slight fog along with strong winds certainly did nothing to help our cause. I was warm, protected by my jacket and my hoodie which he pulls up over my head, but the poor man had nothing on but a shirt.

“Run?” I suggest. Waiting it out was going to take forever.

“Should we?” he gives the most gorgeous smirk I’ve ever seen, and grabs my hand as we run towards the car, which was quite a fair distance from the entrance. I was laughing, he was laughing, then the idiot forgot which pocket he put his car keys in, so we spent a good couple of seconds just standing near the car and letting ourselves get consumed by the wet. I would’ve been mad, if it weren’t for the fact that he was suffering from the rain more than me, his white shirt almost see-through. We sat in his car, trying to catch our breath and get warm as he turns the heater up. It was silent like that for a while; listening to the radio, looking at the rain, looking at each other. With as much courage as I could muster, I lift up my hand and use my sleeve to rub off the droplets of rain that was still on his hair, moving down towards his left cheek, never once breaking his gaze. I desperately wanted to know what he was thinking. About me, about him, about everything; I wanted some kind of assurance that he was going to be fine. Suddenly, I feel his hand on mine, and see him close his eyes and press his cheek onto it with a soft sigh. I smile, rub his cheek a little with my thumb and let my hand return back into my lap, convincing myself that was all I needed from him.

“Let’s go,” I say, “Before you get sick.”

Note: Anything in italics is spoken, written in Korean.

AN: Thankyou so much to the subsribers and readers, you're amazing. I hope you're enjoying this as much as I am writing it!