Five
3,652 Days
0586. The Day of Kris’s 23rd Birthday
“Make a wish, already, ge,” Tao said, his lips, eyes glinting with hunger.
“Okay, okay.” Kris closed his eyes. I wish you would call me, Giraffe. With a powerful exhale, Kris blew out the candles, a light wisp of smoke in the air as the five others clapped. He allowed himself to smile, to laugh, to enjoy his birthday, but as the celebration came to an end, the members heading to bed early, he found himself feeling empty. Aching.
Chanyeol paced back and forth in his room, cell phone gripped tightly in his hand. He glanced at the time on the screen. 12:52AM—meaning it was still 11:52PM in China. Just do it. No, don’t do it. No, do it. All the other members at least emailed or texted him. He’s going to think you’re being weird. Do it. No, stop.
“Yeollie, whatever you’re putting so much thought into, either do it already or don’t. Just stop pacing; you’re making me dizzy,” Baekhyun complained, lying upside-down on the top bunk, head hanging over the edge of the mattress.
“It’s your fault for staring at me in that stupid position instead of sleeping,” Chanyeol grumbled under his breath as he walked out of their room. He walked into the living room and made sure everyone had gone to bed. He inhaled a considerable amount of air and released it slowly as he pressed the second number he had on speed dial (the first being his mother). His foot tapped crazily as the dial tone sounded, his mind a chaotic mess.
“Chanyeol?”
It took him a few incoherent peeps before he finally said, “Happy birthday, hyung.”
“Thanks,” Kris said, and Chanyeol heard the smile in his voice.
“Sorry I’m calling so late.” He bit his lip. “I just… I wanted… I wanted…”
“Yeah?”
Chanyeol’s voice came out as a whisper. “I wanted to be the last person you talked to before your birthday ended.” He squeezed his eyes shut at the silence from the other end of the line.
Kris chuckled softly. “I was wondering why everyone but you had already wished me a happy birthday. But now you’ll be the most prominent memory I have of today.”
“Hyung, I need to ask you something.” What are you doing?
“Hmm?”
“What happened the night of the anniversary? You know, the night I had a little too much to drink?”
Again, a silence. Kris cleared his throat. “I don’t know if you really want to know.”
Chanyeol gulped. “Why?”
“You said something that was a little… out of character.”
Great, you really did tell him. “What did—what did I say?”
Don’t make this awkward, Kris. You already got your wish. “Chanyeol, you should go to bed. It’s late over there.”
“It’s only one o’clock.” His mouth was dry, his hands clammy.
“Suho told me you guys have a busy schedule tomorrow. Go to sleep, I’ll talk to you later.”
“Okay, hyung. Happy birthday again. Good night.”
“Thanks, night.”
Chanyeol stared at his phone, uncertain of what to feel.
0607. The Day of Chanyeol’s 21st Birthday
“Yeollie, your phone is ringing,” Baekhyun stated, looking at the caller ID. “Oh, it’s Kris-hyung.” Chanyeol froze as Baekhyun answered the phone. “Hello? Hi, hyung. Yeah, he’s right here. Just a moment.” He handed the cell phone to the birthday boy, placing it in his hand and putting it to his ear when he didn’t move. “Speak,” he mouthed, climbing into his bed.
“H—Hello?” Chanyeol stuttered, walking into the empty hallway.
“Hey, buddy. Happy birthday.”
Kris’s deep voice resounded through his body, filling him with warmth. “Thanks, hyung.” There was a lull as Chanyeol fidgeted with a piece of loose thread from the hem of his t-shirt.
“Is there anything you want? Something I can order and ship to you from the internet perhaps?”
Chanyeol inhaled and exhaled a couple of times before making his request. “Actually, there is something that I’ve been wanting.”
“What is it?”
“Tell me what happened after the anniversary dinner.”
Kris felt his pulse increase in speed. “Chanyeol—”
But he was firm this time. “Tell me.”
After taking a few moments to calm himself down, Kris decided there was no use in keeping it to himself anymore. “You told me you liked me.”
“Yeah, I kind of remember that.”
“You knew?”
“I wasn’t exactly sure. But now I know for sure, and hyung, I was just wasted. You know how—”
“You kissed me.”
Chanyeol’s heart clenched and he drew in a sharp breath, pressing himself against the wall as everything around him began to spin. “I what?”
“You kissed me,” Kris repeated, more softly. The occurrence was vivid in his mind, the memory still fresh. “You were pretty much gone, so I dragged you into your room and tucked you in. But when I was about to leave, you told me to stay. So I did.”
“And then?” Chanyeol could barely hear his own voice.
“And then you said to come closer. So I did. Then you pulled my neck down, and… you kissed me.” A light pinkness crept into Kris’s cheeks as he remembered the soft touch of Chanyeol’s lips against his.
Chanyeol sat down on the floor slowly, trying to collect himself. “Hyung.”
“Yeah?”
“I still like you.”
“I know.”
“I miss you.” Chanyeol’s voice broke, his chest tense.
“I miss you too. But Chanyeol, I need you to do something for me.”
“Yeah?”
“I need you to get over me.”
Chanyeol let out a breath as if he had taken a blow to the stomach. “What?”
“We can’t do this right now. We’re not even in the same country. I just—we can’t.”
The younger boy made a strangled noise. “Hyung—”
“I have to go, Chanyeol. I’ll talk to you some other time.”
As the line went dead, Chanyeol clutched at his chest, choked sobs quaking through his body.
“Chanyeol? What’s wrong?” Suho asked as he came into the hall, crouching down to the boy, but he was unable to speak, simply gripping a fistful of his shirt over his heart, uncontrolled cries overflowing. The leader pulled the broken boy into his arms tightly. “Shh, it’s okay, Chanyeol. You’re going to be okay.”
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Omg why do I always end up writing sad things. Sorry guys. But thank you for your adorable comments!
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