You are thinking that becoming a popstar is an overnight sensation. But I tell you…it’s like a living hell… almost. What I’m trying to say is…as an Irish-Genovian that speaks no Korean at all, it’s absolutely a berserk experience, since I’m a foreigner. But during those hardships, I’ve met someone that would always be by my side. Yup…you’re thinking of Jake from ENHYPEN.

To tell you a little, I actually seemed to like him, even if I was afraid to admit that I really did have a crush on him. But he found out anyway, and he accepted it. 

As it turned out, he needed someone to stay by his side, as well. But…in the end, he was casted in a K-Pop group…and I wasn’t. I was treated like I was rubbish in a waste basket. I know it wasn’t fair…but I had to keep going.

Even if I had to train for a long time, even though I had to diet frequently, even if every one of my teachers had to yell at me for no reason at all…I learned to keep going.

And I tell you, you are always going to find people that are going to criticize you. It just seems hard to follow your dreams when no one really appreciates your work to move all the way up.

I’m sure Jake had to go through all of this too. But no matter what happened during that time, and if I’m being really honest…I am actually glad to have found a friend whilst going through the toughest times in my life, and that includes losing a few friends (that weren’t really friends at all). One day at a time…I’ll just…work hard for now.

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I was about, what? Fifteen, sixteen years old when I managed to pass the auditions for the K-Pop agency Dream Life Entertainment.

But I was only let in because of my dance skills. And the CEO Kim Hwa-min was the one to do so. And I’ve never felt so appreciated in my life. And the Mr. Hwa-min was one of those people. 

But my dance teacher was even kinder. How I had to do the auditions was pretty hectic, even for a foreigner like me.

I had to learn difficult dances, and I had to memorize song lyrics that were in Korean.

It was while I was practicing the choreography for Boy With Luv by BTS when my mother suddenly walked in. She looked proud of me as she saw my flawless moves.

“I take it that you are practicing?” she asked.

“Well…you can’t do a monologue for these things.” I replied.

At the same time, I believe Jake Shim was still living his life as a normal teenager. But, we’re not at that part yet. He only comes in by the time I’m in I-LAND.

But anyways, as I kept practicing, I felt as if I was getting better and better. But that was only for me. I didn’t know if the agency thought so either.

I arrived at the agency at five in the morning. I know it’s too early, but it’s okay. I could handle it. I thought of it as a miracle, when they let me in.

But that day changed almost absolutely everything. When Kim Hwa-min entered the practice room.

He said, "Ladies, since our usual dance teacher was in a freak accident, we now have a new one to take her place. Please welcome my younger cousin, Shim Tae-woo. But as your usual was laying in the hospital, she said on the phone that she was flooded with so many memories."

Tae-woo: Oh boy! This is a snooze fest!

*overlapping voices until Hwa-min is out of the room*

I felt nothing