Chapter 9

“Ugh, why is this part so hard?” Jessica groaned in frustration. She sprawls herself on the carpet in the middle of the living room. She has been practicing the same part over and over again. But, she keeps failing to get it right. No matter how much she tries it, her voice would end up cracking at some point during the part. She felt defeated.

“A young lady shouldn’t lay on the floor like that.” Taeyeon spoke and took a sip of the black coffee. She has her eyes focusing on her phone’s screen.

Jessica looks at her. “Why’s that? Is it inappropriate?” She asked. She might speak Korean fluently but she still has yet to learn everything about the cultures. She was born in California and she had been living there almost half her life.

“No, unless you have guests over and you’re purposely laying there. I meant you’ll get back-pains.” Taeyeon replied; her eyes still glued onto the screen.

“But, I’m not having back pains-oh, is that old people’s problems?” Jessica gave a teasing grin. It made the older woman rolled her eyes. She playfully throws the cushion at Jessica. “Yah, I’m not that old.” The brunette can only laughs it off.

It has been about three months since Taeyeon and Jessica met, the older woman founds her usual afternoon routines had completely changed over the last few months. Instead of spending the rest of the day sleeping on the comfort of her bed, here she is, babysitting the 24-years old idol. Jessica would come to her doorstep almost every week; bringing food or simply lazing around in her apartment. Not that Taeyeon minds it, she loves having Jessica around.

“I’m hungry!” Jessica stood up only to plopped herself next to Taeyeon. “I want…noodles…and oh, dumplings!” She said excitedly.

“I thought you’re on a diet.” Taeyeon responded. The brunette pouts at the answer and lets her head fall onto the older woman’s laps. She gently pushes Taeyeon’s phone away. “I’m reading, jeez.” Taeyeon complained. But upon seeing Jessica’s cute, begging expression, she gives in. “Alright, alright.”

“Yes!” Jessica cheered happily.

Taeyeon goes ahead to the kitchen. Ever since Jessica’s frequent visit to her apartment, she has been buying more groceries to stuffed inside her fridge. She even considers buying a new one since the ingredients would not fit sometimes. After three months, Taeyeon seemed to understand Jessica’s appetite. Whenever she cooks, she is forbidden to put cucumbers in it. The last time she did; Jessica almost fainted from the smell. Quite dramatic, Taeyeon thought.

“Ah, that looks so good!” Jessica clasped her eyes as she breathed in the scent of the fried dumplings cooking on the pan. Taeyeon just smiles when she sees the younger woman is happy just seeing the simple dish she made. It made her wanted to learn more about cooking.

“Lunch is served.” It did not take long for the dishes to be done. Taeyeon puts down two bowls of Ganjang Bibim Guksu; one is garnished with cucumbers while the other doesn’t. Afterwards, she puts down a plate of freshly fried dumplings. Jessica’s eyes sparkle at the sight of the mouth-watering dishes. She waited for Taeyeon to sit down first before they started eating.

The day Jessica heard that Summer would be overseas for solo activities, she is so hyped about it. She would not be seeing the wicked witch for another four to five months. She can finally have some peace. Just the thought of not having to be scared and anxious all the time made her overly grateful. Besides that, Jessica can spend time more time with Taeyeon without Summer being so nosy about it.

Once the showcase ended that night, Jessica was preparing herself to received another beating from Summer at home. After Taeyeon’s heated confrontation with the older member, Jessica expected a much worse punishment from Summer.

However, nothing happened. Summer entered the car and did not utter a single word. She did not even spare a single glance at Jessica during the whole trip back to the dorm. It was odd. Could it be that Summer was actually intimidated by Taeyeon? That was impossible. Summer is an aggressive and short-tempered woman. Jessica simply thought she was too tired to even give her a slap. The next thing she knew, Summer had already packed her bags to go to her overseas schedule the day after that.

“Ah, I ate well.” Jessica satisfyingly rubbed her full-stomach. Taeyeon feels proud at herself when she sees the empty bowl and plate. She is a much better cook nowadays. Suddenly, Jessica’s phone rings. She looks at the screen to see none other than her manager’s name, Kang Seulgi. “Hello?” She spoke as she soon she picked up the call. It is a cue that Jessica will be going away for a schedule after this. Taeyeon silently takes the dirty dishes to the sink while Jessica is still on call.

“Sure, sure, okay. Bye.” The brunette sighed.

“What’s wrong?” Taeyeon asked while leaning on the kitchen’s counter.

“Seulgi just told me she wouldn’t be able to pick me up. The company’s van suddenly broke down.” Jessica regretfully informed about the situation. “She asked me if I can take the taxi instead.”

Taeyeon glances at the clock on the wall. “I’ll drive you there then.” She said. “I’m pretty sure I can reach there before your schedule starts.” Jessica smiles brightly at the idea. This means, she can spend more time with Taeyeon. She nods rather excitedly; saying yes to the offer.

***

The car arrives in front of a company’s building. “Today’s your recording, right?” Taeyeon asked. Jessica nods to the question. About a week ago, the young singer was offered to sing a duet song with Onew, the main vocalist of a famous boy-band. This is her second ‘biggest’ project after her solo debut. But, she is unsure of herself if she can do well during recording. She has been struggling with the high notes on the bridge part of the song.

Taeyeon notices the concern expression on the brunette’s face. She reaches her hand to pat Jessica’s head with a gentle smile. “Hey, don’t worry. You’ll be fine.” She said.

“I…I don’t know. I’m scared that I’ll screw this up.” Jessica sighed heavily.

“You won’t, trust me.” Taeyeon hums as she think of the words to comfort her. “If…you’re too nervous, then just imagine…that you’re singing with me.” Jessica looks at the older woman. The concern expression she had earlier is replaced with a smile. “You should go now. You’ll be late.” Taeyeon said.

Jessica nods and puts her hand on the door’s handle. But, before she leaves, she have to do something first. She turns around to give Taeyeon a peck on the cheek. “Thanks for sending me here. I’ll see you later.” She smiled brightly and got out of the car. She hurriedly runs to the company’s building; leaving Taeyeon dumbfounded on her own.

“That woman…” Taeyeon held her thumping chest as her lips formed a smile.

***

Jessica keeps humming on the same part repetitively while waiting for her turn to record. She has been inside the recording studio for hours now. Due to the two singers’ clashing schedules for the rest of the month, the producers decided to finish recording the whole song by today. Despite getting sore from singing her parts, she ignores it.

For Jessica, she never got the chance to fully shows her vocal capabilities. Sure, she did released her first solo mini album but the songs were not showing her truest potential as a vocalist. Meanwhile, whenever she sang for the group’s songs, Summer always get the most lines. Jessica always ended up getting only 1/3 of the parts in those songs. Hence, when the duet was offered to her, she got excited about it. She can finally shows her skills as a vocalist with an amazing vocal range.

However, Jessica has been busy from her solo activities that she hardly has the opportunities to practice. She refused to give herself an excuse though. Despite her anxiousness, she has to stay professional. But, she cannot deny the fact that she is still not confident. “Rest a bit.” The producer said to Onew. He nods his head before going out of the recording room. Jessica offers him a bottle of water once he sits down on the couch.

“You sang great, sunbaenim.” She praised him.

“Yah, come on. Don’t call me that. We’ve been friends for years now.” Onew chuckled.

The two have known each other since they were trainees. They went to the same vocal academy. Onew debuted a year before Jessica did. Despite the man being her senior in the music industry, he never treated her any differently. He was actually the one who suggested Jessica to the producers for the duet. Onew has always thought of Jessica as an incredible singer. She was just unfortunate to be put in a group with Summer; the selfish idol.

“Hey,” The singers looked at the producer. “Since Onew isn’t in his best condition, how about we record the bridge part first?” He said. Jessica could feel the anxiety slowly creeping up on her after hearing the suggestion. The bridge of the song consisted of notes that gets higher for each lines. Her voice has been cracking on that particular part during practice. She thought she would have more time to prepare herself.

“A-are you sure?” Jessica stuttered. The producer nodded. “We don’t want to overwork his vocals.” He stated his reason. “We’ll get over the bridge so Onew can take it easy afterwards.”

“I’m fine with it but…” Onew then turns to the side to look at Jessica. Of course, she hesitates to do so. But, seeing how Onew is pushing himself today despite his poor health condition, she could not bring herself to be selfish. Jessica fakes a smile. “Sure, let’s do it.”

“Great! You two can get ready now.” The producer said before going back to check on the recordings again. Both of the idols enter the recording room to prepare themselves. Jessica is too anxious that she accidentally drops the headphone and almost knocks over the lyric stand while picking it up. Onew quickly notices that his friend is feeling nervous.

“If you need more time, I can always do the second verse first.” He said. But, Jessica shook her head. “I’ll be fine, you don’t have to worry.” She gave him a reassuring look. Onew could only responded with a nod. After a short briefing from the producer, the recording begins. Jessica can hear the second chorus being played. Onew sang the part beautifully; which made her more anxious if she would mess it up after this. She took a deep breath.

Geugeotmajeodo kkuk chamasseo,
Geureoke ilnyeoni heulleowasseo,

The producer lift his head up to look at Jessica. She had her eyes close as her lips stay shut. The instrumental keeps playing at the background. Onew gently places his hand on Jessica’s shoulder; causing her to flinch. He worriedly looks at her. “You didn’t…” Her eyes widen upon realizing she did not sings the next line earlier as she was supposed to. She was too caught up by her anxiousness that she had completely forgotten about it. Ah, she have already messed it up, she thought.

“I-I’m sorry.” Jessica apologized.

“It’s alright, let’s try again.” Onew said with a soft smile. The second chorus was played once again. Jessica took another deep breath. She cannot afford to make the same mistake again. She forcefully shoved away the anxiousness swirling inside her chest. The second chorus plays again. She softly taps her finger on her thigh to get the right timing.

Geureoke ilnyeoni heulleowasseo,

Jessica opens . Hoksi neodo nae mam gateulkka,

Onew sings the next line. Dasi hanbeonman gihoereul jugenni,

Jessica tries to harmonizes with Onew but all of the sudden, her voice cracks and she immediately coughs. The producer quickly stops the recording as Onew hands her a bottle of water. “Are you okay?” He worriedly asked. Jessica nods while holding her chest. She was about to belt out those notes earlier when her anxiety strikes again; causing her to sang off tune. She felt she could not make it. She believes that even if she tries to do it, she will sing horribly. The thought of it made her lose the little confidence she had earlier on.

“Y-you don’t need to force yourself.” Onew spoke.

“I…Can I please have a minute?” Jessica said before turning around to the other side. She looks down at her trembling hands. She feels frustrated at herself for not being able to ignore her nervousness. She did not want to mess it up but she did anyways. She shut her eyes to hold back the tears threatening to fall.

“If…you’re too nervous, then just imagine…that you’re singing with me.”  Jessica slowly open her eyes. She remembered Taeyeon’s words back in the car. All those times, whenever she started doubting herself, Taeyeon was there to stopped her from feeling that way. It would always work. Jessica did not know why but the bartender she met three months ago somewhat became her comfort space. She feels safe and at peace when Taeyeon is there with her, or talking to her on the phone. Just listening to her words and seeing her in person, Jessica becomes serene.

Maybe, if she imagines Taeyeon being here with her, would her anxiousness and insecurities go away?

“I’m ready.” Jessica spoke as soon as she turned to Onew. Her friend looks at her and notices the changed of expression. He smiles and nods. After preparing themselves, the producer plays the track’s second chorus once more. This time, Jessica is no longer seeing Onew standing next to her. Instead, she imagines Taeyeon is there beside her. She opens to sing.

Hoksi neodo nae mam gateulkka, [Are your feelings the same as mine?]

Dasi hanbeonman gihoereul jugenni, [Can you give me one more chance?]

Ijen ara jeoldaero urineun heeojil su eobseo [ I now know that we can never part,]
Saranghago tto saranghaneun han saram, [You’re the one person I loved and still love,]

Ohhh

Uri johatdeon cheoeum geuttaero [If we could have gone back to those good old days, I would,]
Dasi doragasseumyeon hae [To the days when,]
Areumdawotgo (areumdawotgo) [ Our love was beautiful,]
Haengbokhaesseotdeon (haengbokhaesseotdeon) [and happy,]
Sarangieotdeon naldeullo [Heartbreaking stories, meaningless arguments,]
Gaseum apeun yaegideul (Oh wow) heotdoen datumdeul [Let’s bury them all now,]
Ijen modu da mudeodugo [ And say we’ll never,]
Dasin kkeonaeji malgiro hae [ Bring it back up,]
Gyejeori tto heulleo [ The season changes again,]
Myeot nyeoni jinado [ Even when many years pass,]
Oneul gateun mannam dasin eobtgil. [ Let’s never have the same feelings we had today.]

As the rest of the instrumental plays towards the ending, Jessica looks at Taeyeon and smiles at her. Even though she is not physically there, but Jessica can still feel the deep connection she has with her. She did not know that somewhere in town, Taeyeon can feel the same connection too.

**

“I did well! Thanks to you, I did it.” Taeyeon smiles brightly as she remembers the conversation she had earlier with Jessica on the phone. As soon as the recording session was finished, Jessica called Taeyeon and told her everything. Taeyeon was glad that her words helped Jessica to fought back her insecurities. She replies to the singer’s chat before putting her phone inside the locker. She exits the staff’s room to see Hyoyeon carrying a crate full of red wines out from her office. Taeyeon arches her eyebrow and approaches her cousin. “I thought you don’t want to sell wines?” She asked.

“Yah, these aren’t for sales. It’s for the party!” Hyoyeon said.

“What party?” Taeyeon raised her eyebrows when her cousin gave her a disbelief look. She never bothers remembering any of the staffs’ birthdays. She often forgets her own birthdays too. If it wasn’t for Sunny calling her at the most inconvenient time during that day or Hyoyeon giving her a birthday cake every year, she wouldn’t have celebrated it. She never finds the importance of the event. She just gets a year older. That was it.

“Dude, are you serious?” Hyoyeon scoffs when she saw her cousin shrugging her shoulders. “Come on, you’ve worked here for like, what? Six years? You can’t even remember the pub’s anniversary!”

“Ah, that...” Taeyeon shortly replied.

“I…Never mind. I’m planning to throw a party to celebrate. I’m having our family and friends over. So, we won’t be opening tomorrow.” Hyoyeon explained. Taeyeon nods her head. “Does this mean-”

“No.”

“I haven’t even finish yet.”

“I already know what you’re going to say. You’re coming to this party, Kim Taeyeon. This is an order from your boss .” Hyoyeon said while pointing at herself. Taeyeon sighs heavily. She rarely comes to any types of gatherings. The thought of having to socializes with people tires her. She rather stays at home and binge-watch her favorite movies. But, seeing how persistent Hyoyeon is, she didn’t bother to argue and just goes with the decision.

“Hey, invite someone.” Hyoyeon said as she checked the wines in the crates.

“You know my mom hates me working here.” Taeyeon responded.

“I know that. She almost choke me when I told her that I hired you.” The woman shudders at the memory of her aunt’s rage years ago. “Invite someone else.”

“Soonkyu and her golden retriever.” Taeyeon replied.

“Soonkyu always comes here even when we don’t invite her. The woman drinks so much, I swear her lips are getting thicker every single day. Don’t you have any other friends?”

“No, I don’t, Hyo.” Taeyeon turns around to take out a few glasses from the shelf.

“Aish, you’re a lost cause. You could’ve bring at least one guest to the party.” Hyoyeon sighed heavily while shaking her head.

“I have no friends…” Taeyeon did not finishes her sentence when a certain someone suddenly comes into mind. “Except for her.” She said in a low voice.

“What’s that?” Hyoyeon asked.

Taeyeon has been wondering for a while now if she should introduces Jessica to them. It has been three months since they have become close with each other. No one knew about their relationship except for Seulgi and Summer. She did not want to cause a chaos. Jessica is an idol. People would start questioning of how they’ve met and she certainly did not want to disclose that information. But, the thought of it also made Taeyeon curious of how Jessica feels.

The singer never hides her relationship with Taeyeon. She even invited her to the showcase. She wonders if Jessica ever feels the want for Taeyeon to do the same thing as well; introducing her to her family and friends. Taeyeon slowly turns to look at Hyoyeon who is busy checking the rest of the wines. “I…um, I actually have one person in mind.” She flinches when her cousin sharply turns her head towards her.

“Really?” Hyoyeon sounded disbelief.

“Yah, what’s with the tone? You said you wanted me to invite someone.”

“A-ah, sorry, it’s just…I never would have thought….Anyways, who is it?”

Taeyeon shrugs. “I’m not telling you.” She replied with a teasing smile.

“Y-Yah! Aish, you know what, I’m not going to ask again. You’re too secretive, it annoys me.” Hyoyeon gave in. Taeyeon simply chuckles at the reaction she receives from her cousin. She is curious; if Jessica will accepts her invitation.

**

Taeyeon tiredly leans her back on the brick wall while silently looking at the starless night sky. She can still hear the sound of vehicles on the road. She takes out a cigarette, slipping it in between her lips and lights it up. She smoothly blows out the greyish smoke into the air. “Is she sleeping already?” She asked herself. After a minute of staying still, Taeyeon picks up her phone and opens her contact list. Jessica’s name is first on the list. She places the phone’s speaker on her ear. It did not take long for Jessica to answers her call.

“Taeyeon!” The brunette cheerfully greeted.

“Hey, sorry for calling you this late at night, Sica-yah.” Taeyeon said. “Are you going home?” She asked when she heard the background sounds on the other side of the call.

“Yeah, I just finished my last schedule earlier.” Jessica answered.

“Ah, okay…” The older woman went silent for a short few seconds as she thinks of the right words to say. “I, umm, I actually called you…because I wanted to ask if you’re...f-free in the evening?” Taeyeon didn’t realizes how tightly her hand is gripping onto the bench. She can hear Jessica humming on the speaker. It made her more anxious as she anticipates the response.

“I have an interview with xxx.” When Taeyeon heard the answer, she feels an odd ache inside her chest. She lowers her head in disappointment. Damn, is this what people feels when their crushes could not accept their invitations? It was a first time experience for the 33 years old woman. “Why are you asking?” Jessica asked after receiving no responses.

“Ah…” Taeyeon takes a silent, deep breath. “Uh, it’s nothing.” She dryly chuckled.

“Oh, come on, tell me.”

“Well, Hyoyeon told me that we’ll have this…party to celebrate the pub’s anniversary. She asked me to invite someone. I could only thought of you.” Taeyeon honestly answered.

“Oh.”

“Look, you’re working so…it’s fine. You don’t have to worry.”

“You sound sad.” Jessica said. Taeyeon shut her eyes; cursing at herself for being so obvious about her feelings. She is usually good at hiding her emotions but it seemed she fails to do it tonight. She could have just make an excuse. But, she decides not to. “I am.” She bits the corner of her bottom lip. “We’ve known each other for 3 months. I really…wanted to introduce you to my friends. I was excited about the idea.” She honestly answered.

Jessica becomes silent. When she first met Kim Taeyeon, she never would have thought their relationship would bloom in a special way. She is an idol who is beloved by dozen of fans while Taeyeon is just a bartender at a small pub. They are living such different lives. After what happened to Tiffany, Jessica was scared if she would make the same mistake again; ruining another person’s life. It became the sole reason why she was afraid of being personally attached to someone. She was terrified if her attachment towards Taeyeon will ultimately hurt them both.

What if after meeting Taeyeon’s friends and families, it would be harder for Jessica to ignore her feelings? The thought of it saddens her heart.

“I’m sorry, it must’ve been awkward for you to hear that.” Taeyeon suddenly spoke after minutes of silence. “Just forget about what I said-”

“I’ll go.”

“What?” Taeyeon almost let the cigarette falls onto her thigh when her jaws dropped.

“I’ll be going…to the party.” Jessica repeated her answer.

“B-but, what about your interview?” The older woman can hear Jessica’s sweet chuckle.

“You won’t mind if I come a bit late, right?”

“No! I-uh, no.” Taeyeon slaps her forehead for being too excited about this.

 Jessica holds back her laughter. “Then, I’ll be there.” She said.

“I…” Taeyeon smiles. “I’ll be waiting.”

To be continued.

Hello, this is reowesome. I'm sorry for not being able to update sooner. I have been busy. I finally have the time to finish the latest chapter. Thank you for the new subs and new votes. Also, thank you for the comments! I appreaciate it a lot :) I know the story has quite the slow-pace but I believed that's what makes it more interesting for the readers. I hope you guys enjoy the latest chapter and please let me know what you think of the ff so far.