-you're not my homeland anymore, so what am I defending?-

 Hey Dorothea, do you ever stop and think about me? 

 Jongin was about to turn the radio off when he heard this line in the sweet voice of a singer that Yerim liked. He knew this voice. He knew this song too, even though he had never heard it before. The voice filled the large void of his room as he tossed the soccer ball from one hand to the other. 

 He wanted to make a snowman.

 But then he’d just end up feeling sad.

 You got shiny friends since you left town. A tiny screen's the only place I see you now.

 Jongin fell back on his bed and stared at the ceiling, thinking about that very line. He hugged the soccer ball and pressed his face into the blanket’s surface, clicking his tongue. He tried everyday, to make a snowman on his own. His mother told him, Yerim will fade into the sky like a star when he'd grow up. But Jongin knew she would rise by the nights, like stars, her thoughts would be there with him all the time and he’d never be bored; thinking of her new friends, scrolling through her pictures on his phone, he would feel her last hug to his bones until she returned to this dead town again. 

 The song finished. Jongin turned the radio off and thought about it.

 And if you're ever tired of being known for who you know, you know, you'll always know me,
 

 Dorothea
 

 Yerim texted her last day. Jennie was out doing grocery shopping with her nephew when she stopped at the aisle and fished the phone out of the pocket of her coat. The little boy who accompanied her burst into awe as he walked down the aisles between all the toys. There was a link sitting on the box when she opened it.

 Sehun had made an instagram account. Jennie chuckled to herself, wondering how the hell Yerim finally convinced him. But then her smile fell as she wondered if it was truly Yerim who had convinced him to do so. Jennie kept the phone back but couldn’t help her curiosity when she took two more steps towards the cornflakes sitting at the corner of the shelf for her.

 There was a picture of his shadow on the sidewalk of New York on the round display. He had gained some followers but only followed his sister and power rangers. Jennie just knew Yerim had made this account for him. Even though Sehun could be rather smart at fixing the electronic equipment, he wasn’t smart with socializing in such apps. His name was neatly written underneath the picture, and there was nothing else. Jennie pressed on the blue icon to follow him.

 There was a picture underneath. Jennie clicked instantly, her smile brightening at the weird picture of the two siblings. Clearly, Yerim was very keen about taking pictures of every moment and so was Sehun but he barely acted on this quality. Jennie hoped they were done unpacking while zooming in on her friend. Sehun was in the background, posing with their new lamp shade, two fingers sticking up in a V. And as she swiped from the right, he just got weirder, and closer, making her laugh in the middle of a crowded store. Clearly, he never knew these pictures were going to his first ever social media account.

 And she knew when he would find out, the pictures would be gone from here. She pressed the multicolored circle around his profile picture out of curiosity, expecting to see another set of Yerim’s photography of her brother doing his daily chores but instead, she saw a girl.

 In her red sweater and short denim skirt, his date almost got lost in the crimson wall behind her little frame. Bright smile accompanied her pretty face. Jennie watched the picture change, one after another, so many. The vision became blurry. Jennie tried to smile. But she felt so jumbled. Leaving the cart right there, she ran out of the shop with tears b up her eyes. She was running home, to her left, crying uncontrollably. It hurt so much in her whole body. There was a rock on her chest, digging into her skin with the pressure of the whole world. Jennie stumbled and didn’t bother getting back up when her hit the pavement.

 She cried.

 For no reason at all.

 He did tell her...that they were going to have a date. Friday, 7 pm. But Friday never came. She had waited, with her hair curled and her shirt ironed and her pretty nails. Sehun didn’t pick up his phone. He ignored her and she ran around the neighborhood, worried that he had gotten in trouble. He never came. She waited. So she cried.

 But then she remembered she had left her nephew in the shop.

 Yerim had noticed it. Sehun had become such a mom. She didn’t want that for him. When their mother ran away that night, Yerim was shocked, she was trembling from head to toe, scared that if she went near Sehun, he would tear her into halves with the rage in his quivering hands. The blood had pooled around them while their mother slammed the door to her room upstairs. With his head on her lap, she had felt the extreme need to treasure him and keep him safe. A responsibility bloomed deep in her stomach along with the crippling fear that she might lose him that night.

 Junmyeon broke through the flimsy door. His face shone in the golden lights of the house that flickered on the three of them. And on the blood, and on all the things they had lost that day. The sirens of the ambulance still haunted her dreams. She went with him, trying to wake him up inside the white vehicle, slapping his cheek with desperation. When he woke up, he had already been transferred into one of Junmyeon’s large rooms. She was right next to him. But she was shaken from the core, too afraid to approach him as the scenes of last night floated before her eyes.

 So she retreated to her room and cried for a father she had never known. He used to play badminton with me, Sehun had told her one day, and cards, and basketball, and he’d help me do my science projects too, Rim. But don’t worry. I’ll do all those for you too.

 Now her brother, who had promised to be her father, had also become her mother.

 “You having trouble at school?” He asked one morning while coating his pinky with toothpaste. That was because he had burnt his fingers with the hot iron. Yerim took a bite of her sandwich and prolonged the silence to make up an answer in her head.

 She shook her head while eating, “I’m fine. Why?”

 Sehun arched his brows, as if in confusion. “Your school called last night. Actually, your homeroom teacher called, out of her own interest.”

 , Yerim thought, her chewing slowed to a stop when she swallowed the big chunks down out of fear. Sehun read her face and smiled a bit. “So I am right. You are having problems at school,” he smirked lightly, before walking to her while placing the spiraling cap on the tube of the paste. Yerim gulped once again.

 “Did I say that?”

 “Yes, your face did.”

 “I know I know, you’re lying. Teacher didn’t call you. You just...guessed.” Yerim caught up with him, watching the smile vanish from his face as he became more serious. “What? My teacher doesn't even care.”

 “Are you being bullied at school?”

 “No.”

 “I’ll drop you off today so I’ll see for myself.”

 “No! I don’t...look, Sehun...you’ve got some chatting to do. Did you even greet her good morning? I’ll be fine. I have all the homework done. And Tiana’s really nice to me. I’ll handle school and you handle your potential girlfriend. Sounds like a plan, yup.”

 Sehun folded his arms and inhaled in the tense silence that followed. Yerim drummed her fingers on the table with a big smile. “That’s not convincing at all,” he commented. “I don’t have any big work at home. I just need to fold your clothes and mop the floors and that’s it. So, it’s decided. I’m going with you.”

 Yerim’s shoulders fell. She didn’t want him to watch her fail in her fights at the school gates. Yerim actually had no friends. She missed Jongin but her school always had something to distra