.2.

She never liked drinking.

She always hated the taste of alcohol but she had to make an exception today, that despite the bitterness, it was the numb feeling that consumes her. It made her forget things even for a fleeting moment. It wasn’t always the best idea but it made her feel better at some way.

She started drinking in college when she was invited by her classmates after an event at school, as a timid person that she is, it was an opportunity for her to make new friends considering that she was still a freshman. She thought it was time for her to step out of the box to try new things, which was what she had missed in high school.

She didn’t like the taste especially the burning sensation overpowering but somehow she got used to it until it became her temporary safe haven amidst the chaos.

She found herself sitting on the red couch at the living room surrounded by people who she barely know, chugging on her fifth beer as she finally got used to its pungent taste, but she just sat there, watching them converse to one another, minding their own businesses.

She didn’t care anymore if people would steal glances at her.

She didn’t care anymore if she looked miserable because she is.

Then she thought of Ina, about the conversation they had a while ago. She didn’t want to admit it to herself that a tiny bit of hope sparked within her that Ina might’ve meant it when she said she wanted to catch up but Haru knew better that Ina just said it out of politeness, something she always did.  She finished the remaining content of her cup as she was ready to call it a night.

She stood in front of the bathroom mirror, staring at her reflection, her cheeks were flushed red, her eyes getting heavy as well as her head. Good thing she reached the bathroom on time before throwing up her whole dinner. It wasn’t on her list of crazy adventures to puke at a party in front of strangers. She wasn’t much of a heavy drinker and she always knew her limit when it comes to it. Then again just as she said this was an exception but she might’ve had a bit of a miscalculation on the grams.

Someone accidentally ran into her, bumping her shoulder as she took a step to regain her balance. She fished her phone out from her pocket as she dialed a number. She leaned against the wall, lifting her head up to prevent herself from another trip to the bathroom.

“Pick up. Pick up.” She whispered desperately. The person on the end wasn’t picking up and it was hopeless even if she calls her again. She took a few deep breathes, trying to calm herself down. “Okay, you got this, Haru.”

She made her way through the crowd as the party never died down, she noticed the arrival of another batch of guests. She can’t help but think how much of a killjoy she is if she was the first person to ever leave the party then again she didn’t have much more of a reason stay anyway and her head was killing her already.

She was already at the hallway through the front door when she noticed Ina approaching her. “Haru, I’ve been looking all over for you. Where have you been?” She didn’t answer her, it’s not that she doesn’t want to, it was just she can’t seem to process her thoughts. Her mind was scattered everywhere and the loud music wasn’t helping her at all.

“I’m – “She pressed both of her hands on her forehead as she tried to focus on her thoughts.

Ina gave her a discern look, “Haru? Are you okay?”

“I’m, I’m fine.” She firmly said.

Her head was pounding like crazy. Being alone with Ina asking her if she’s okay is the least of things she wants to deal with right now. She couldn’t stand being with Ina and her fake sincerity anymore. She could feel her emotions coming up again and this time, there’s nothing that could help her from bottling it up.

She needed to leave.

Now.

“Ina, I – “

A familiar figure suddenly came by the door and she instantly regretted coming to the party. She wasn’t much impressed to herself at her decision-making skills, how it might have slip her mind when she was weighing the cons and pros of going to this party, specifically. She was one hundred percent sure Ina was going to the party but she left out the thought that Lucas would be coming too as she assumed him to still be at HongKong.

“Ina,” He greeted her first also surprised at the unexpected scene in front of him. He shifted his gaze to the person next to her, “Haru, what’s up?”

Haru suddenly tensed hearing his voice as she kept her head down, mentally cursing at herself. She could feel her stomach churn. She was now desperate. She needed to get out before she embarrass herself any further not that she care of but she wanted to at least leave this place with the slightest dignity.

The music grew louder and her head was immensely pounding.

“I think Haru’s drunk.” Ina stated with concern.

“Hey, Haru, do you want to sit down for a while?” Lucas asked as he took a step forward to assist her but she quickly backed away. Seeing him and hearing his voice again is one thing that she can get use to but being near him is different thing.

“I said I’m fine!” She said in her defense, her voice a bit louder than the usual. She could feel her emotions coming one by one and she can’t seem to stop it now.

***

It had been months since he went to a party.

The last time he attended one was an event at the hospital but that was more formal compared to w